Tofurky


cjones11242016

Among all the stupid and idiotic issues Donald Trump ran on the promise of jailing his political opponent was the dumbest.

First, it’s illegal. It was one of the Articles of Impeachment written up for Richard Nixon, and yet Trump ran on it. He was promising to be impeached. Second, it’s not what we do. We’re not a banana republic, or at least we weren’t.

His supporters feel betrayed. He encouraged chants of “lock her up.” He said he’d order his Attorney General to open an investigation of Hillary Clinton. During the last debate he said she’d “be in jail” if he was in chargeย (between his sniffles). He claimed her email scandal was larger than Watergate. Now he says “never mind.”

Even Breitbart, the alt-right bastion of hatred and a magnet for white supremacists and Nazis is upset. They supported Trump during the campaign and even took his side after his (now former) campaign manager roughed up one of their female reporters. Their leader is taking a job as Trump’s Chief Nazi Strategist.

The thing is, Trump doesn’t decide who gets investigated. The president does not do that. If he does do that then he and his Justice Department are breaking the law. Donald Trump is either a huge liar who lied all along or he doesn’t know what his new job entails. It’s not king. I don’t care if he does convince Scotland to move windmills away from his golf club.

Donald Trump is going to break a lot of promises so his supporters should get used to it. Now he says he’s “open minded” about climate change and wants to keep parts of Obamacare. You know that wall he promised and you voted for? Yeah, that’s now gonna be a fence and in some parts, an imaginary wall. You fell for the sales pitch of a con man.

If you’re a liberal disappointed that Trump won’t pursue punishing his political enemy because you wanted to see him impeached, don’t worry. He’s guaranteeing us the most corrupt administration in American history. He’s holding meetings with foreign leaders and bringing up his business and having his daughter, who will lead his company, in on the meetings. He’s stated that a president “can’t have a conflict of interest,” which is like when Nixon said “it’s not illegal if the president does it.” Maybe this is something he will learn.

Creative stuff: This is the second Thanksgiving themed cartoon I’ve drawn this year. It’s also the last since I’m not usually fond of them and this is dated for Thanksgiving day. Some cartoonists continue to draw holiday themed cartoons even after the particular holiday is over. I don’t get that. At least I didn’t use the pardon or a Pilgrim about to chop off a Turkey head.

I had fun with Trump’s mouth. That didn’t sound right. Let me rephrase it. I had fun DRAWING Trump’s mouth for this one. I tried something a little bit different and took a cue from Alec Baldwin’s impersonation of Trump he performs on Saturday Night Live. He does this thing where he leaves his mouth hanging open, like a mouth breather, and gives the impression he’s confused and trying to think with great difficulty. It really works.

I research some bizarre stuff for my cartoons and today I researched Tofurky. Yes, I spelled it correctly. I would have spelled it “Tofurkey” if I hadn’t looked it up (and I just noticed the trending hashtag on Twitter spells it incorrectly). Tofurky is actually the copyrighted name of a product. It’s meatless turkey made from tofu (bleah) and soy (double bleah) and it looks kinda like a roast you don’t want to eat. During my research I even went over a taste test of veggie turkey dinners and some looked like a roast and others resembled cat food. Apparently they all tasted kinda like cat food except for one, which wasn’t Tofurky. I don’t know for sure what I’ll be having on Thursday but I guarantee you it won’t be Tofurky.

Several years ago I was seeing a girl who is Jewish and I went to her home on Thanksgiving. There wasn’t any turkey or cranberry sauce but they had a brisket. On the way home I had to stop at Wawa for their “gobbler” bowl thingy. It wasn’t Thanksgiving for me without turkey, cranberry sauce, and stuffing.

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12 comments

  1. Hey now… don’t knock brisket. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    (I’m Jewish, but I happen to agree. I want me some turkey & stuffing on Thanksgiving. Someone wants to cook a brisket as well, that’s fine. But, it’s not the main course. LOL)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m the same way. I don’t mind brisket. Put it out. But I wants me some turkey too. I have a lot of friends who are Jewish but I haven’t really talked to them about Thanksgiving, except for that one girl (and her brisket was terrible). I dated another Jewish girl we it wasn’t over the holidays. I did go to a Jewish friend’s home during Xmas and it was very nice.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh, then you’re lucky you & that girl broke up (clearly, I’m just kidding; I’m sure she was a lovely woman). Bad brisket – unless it’s the occasional one-off, even my Grammy made some gnarly brisket & matzoh balls that were more like golf balls – does not bode well.

        I shouldn’t talk. I can’t cook anything (well, actually, I make a mean matzoh ball soup), let alone brisket. LOL I should get Grammy’s recipe while she’s still around.

        Oh! Did you get to go experience a traditional Jewish Christmas, with Chinese food & a movie? They’re fantastic! *dies laughing*

        Liked by 1 person

      2. BTW, Happy Thanksgiving (AKA, turkey genocide day, AKA, can’t believe we’re treating Native Americans like crap in 2016 day ๐Ÿ˜‰ ). Whether you went to Wa-Wa, family, or friends, I hope you had a lovely time & got your turkey on. ๐Ÿ™‚

        Like

  2. And liberals shouldn’t get too excited about this flip-flop on climate change or anything because he will flip back and again and again.

    Reading through the entire NY times transcript yesterday gave me brain damage by the way.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Sadly, the conflict of interest thing was written specifically to exclude the president, VP, Congress, and federal judges. You’d think they’d all need it more than anybody else. (Yo, Scalia and Thomas, talking to you, dead or alive.)

    And Tofurky is actually pretty good. Sliced thickly with its stuffing and organic cranberry sauce on whole-grain bread with organic mixed veggies around it, it’s a fine lefty feast that even my non-vegetarian husband will eat happily. I haven’t eaten meat since 1972, but I always thought turkey was dry and tasteless anyway.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I wasn’t actually “dating” her. It was a fling type thing. I have done the Jewish Christmas before without being with anyone Jewish. Thank God for the Chinese. I may do that again this year. Though I just moved and the last place in my area I ordered from didn’t have good Kung Pao so I gotta find another place.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey, now… I’m young, I’m hip… I know what “dating” means. I had a full conversation today with a 16 year old today (she was buried in her phone, we busted her chops about it, it was hilarious). I used it today to describe someone I was … “flinging” with for 3 years, but never “dated” in a “change your status on FB” sort of way. LMFAO ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜›

      I fully support non-Jewish people having “Jewish Christmas.” The more, the merrier. Unless you make my Chinese food take longer, then we’ve got beef. & not the delicious sesame-seed kind! LOL

      I feel like life is the quest for the perfect Chinese food restaurant. Where we live, we have good Chinese food. It still took some shopping around to find an ideal delivery spot.

      Good luck in your quest. May the Kung Pao be with you! ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I haven’t changed my FB status since I got on FB. Where I lived before I had a place with really good Kung Pao. There’s a lot of options here and I just have to find the one that does it right.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Wow! I didn’t think relationships could be official unless FB knew about it! ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜›

        Well, I’m glad you have options where you live! Kung Pao is a really popular dish, right? I’ve never had it, but I’d assume someone near you must Kung their Pao well.

        My Aunt has to drive all the way out from Ohio to get decent Chinese food. & pizza. & bagels. She says it’s something in the water. It’s probably raw sewage, but that flavor… LOL

        Like

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