Alvarado Explodes


crsta11092018

This cartoon was first published November 9, 2018 in The Costa Rica Star.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

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Trump’s California Dreaming


cjones11212018

Donald Trump is going to California. Sorry, California.

Trump is very bitter toward California because they didn’t vote for him and it’s ground zero for The Resistance. Their governor doesn’t like Trump. Their two senators don’t like Trump. And now, Orange County, which was the bastion for Reagan conservatism, will be represented in Congress entirely by Democrats.

California is burning as wildfires have claimed the lives of at least 71 people. Over 1,000 are missing. Trump’s first response to this was to tweet a dig at California, blaming the state’s forest management for causing the fires, which of course is wrong.

One woman living in a shelter told the BBC, “If you insult people, then you go visit them, how do you think you’re going to be accepted? You’re not going to have a parade.” That’s sad because Trump really likes parades. What he hates is rain.

Trump flew to France to commemorate the 100th anniversary marking the end of World War One and then skipped a ceremony at a cemetery for American veterans because…it was raining. He also refused to walk with European leaders and allies in the rain. Later in the day while giving a speech to veterans, he complained about having to stand in the rain. When he came home, he skipped going to Arlington National Cemetery on Veterans Day.

What California needs desperately at this time is rain, to drench the wildfires and to keep away Donald Trump.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Zucky’s Sticky Van


cjones11202018

When Facebook discovered Russians were using their platform to meddle in the 2016 presidential election to help Donald Trump, sow seeds of chaos in our nation, and disrupt our democratic process, what did they do?

Did they stop it? No. Did they alert the public? No. Did they do anything to protect our sacred democratic institutions? Oh, hell no. They started a public relations campaign to distract us and hired a Republican opposition research firm to engage in conspiracy theories to deflect the company’s responsibility in the crisis. The GOP firm actually mimicked the Russian strategy and conducted a smear campaign against Democratic financier George Soros by linking him to anti-Facebook protesters.

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is denying any knowledge of the smear campaign or of the hiring of the GOP dirty tricksters. Maybe, your best defense isn’t to copy the defense of the nation’s most historic liar. Next, Zuckerberg will be tweeting (if he tweeted) “no collusion, Russian hoax,” and “witch hunt.”

Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg is blamed for the hiring, but she’s blaming an underling, which is about as believable as Trump not ever knowing there were Russians meeting with his son, son-in-law, and campaign chairman in his campaign headquarters.

A New York Times article accuses Zuckerberg and Sandberg of ignoring warning signs that Russians were exploiting Facebook to “disrupt elections, broadcast viral propaganda and inspire deadly campaigns of hate around the globe,” and of concealing it from the public.

According to the Times article; While Mr. Zuckerberg has conducted a public apology tour in the last year, Ms. Sandberg has overseen an aggressive lobbying campaign to combat Facebook’s critics, shift public anger toward rival companies and ward off damaging regulation. Facebook employed a Republican opposition-research firm to discredit activist protesters, in part by linking them to the liberal financier George Soros. It also tapped its business relationships, lobbying a Jewish civil rights group to cast some criticism of the company as anti-Semitic.

Though Zuckerberg and Sandberg are in denial, the Times story places them in meetings over the events, which is based on interviews with more than 50 people. At some point, the two will start crying “fake news” and go on Hannity.

The Russians have been meddling all over the globe. They’ve attacked our elections, elections in Europe and the entire Brexit mess is their fault. On top of all that, they are a big reason we have a president Donald Trump. What used to be a joke on The Simpsons is now reality. Facebook helped them do that. Since Russians were also paying for ads on their platform, Facebook profited from it.

Facebook was afraid of implicating Russia and taking down fake pages of Russians and their followers because it would anger…wait for it…Republicans. So, instead of angering those Republicans, they joined them. No, they didn’t start a campaign about Clinton’s child-sex-slave pizza joint. They started an anti-Semitic campaign against Soros, people who protest Facebook, and competing companies.

Who could have predicted that Facebook and Twitter would be the end of humanity and civilization?

Facebook and Zuckerberg are complicit. Zuckerberg claims he doesn’t know the stickers are on the side of the van, but it’s his van.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

A Cereal Liar


cjones11192018

The damage Donald Trump has inflicted on this nation in just the past few years will last for generations. Forty years from now, a couple of people will be sitting in a cafe in Paris debating if the United States is still dumb enough to elect a lying, racist, sexist, stupid, juvenile, corrupt reality TV show host.

Trump sycophants with daddy issues believe their deity has restored international respect and prestige to the United States. In reality, he’s brought scorn and ridicule. Donald Trump is an international dumbass.

The sycos are mad at CNN’s Jim Acosta and believe Trump was right to pull his White House press credentials. They accuse him of being a prima donna and disrespecting the president. At the press conference where Acosta infuriated Trump, the reporter prefaced a question about the caravan by pointing out that it’s not an “invasion.” Why did Acosta do this? Because he doesn’t work for Fox News.

It’s a reporter’s job to push back when a politician lies, especially such blatant Trump lies. That’s why Trump goes to the Daily Caller, a wing-nut publication that won’t push back.

Yesterday, Trump gave an interview to the Caller where he again lied about voter fraud in Florida. But, he compounded his usual stupid lie with an even amazingly dumber one. He said, “When people get in line that have absolutely no right to vote and they go around in circles. Sometimes they go to their car, put on a different hat, put on a different shirt, come in and vote again. Nobody takes anything. It’s really a disgrace what’s going on.”

It is a disgrace what’s going on. It’s a disgrace that the president of the United States doesn’t just engage in conspiracy theories but also invents them. It’s a disgrace that the reporters he does talk to don’t call him out on it. But, it gets even dumber.

While arguing for voter ID laws, he said, “If you buy a box of cereal — you have a voter ID. They try to shame everybody by calling them racist, or calling them something, anything they can think of, when you say you want voter ID. But voter ID is a very important thing.”

Trump made the claim last August that you need an ID to buy groceries as if going to Kroger is the same as entering The Viper Room. But, needing an ID to buy cereal? Yeah, maybe if you’re a silly rabbit because Trix are for kids.

And changing shirts to vote again? The pollsters would have to be really stupid to be unable to recognize your face because you changed shirts. That’d only work in a Republican primary.

Trump should bounce his lies off a committee, so they can take a vote on whether the lie is too stupid for a president to tell. Of course, any lie Trump tells passes the smell test for his followers, but how about lies for the rest of us? How about something with a little uncertainty, that’d at least make you Google? Some of us aren’t Tomi Lahren.

But, telling us thousands of illegals in an invading caravan full of Middle Easterners desiring to commit cereal fraud isn’t going to swing it. That’s just a Honey Bunches of Bullshit.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

The Doctors’ Lane


cjones11182018

When the National Rifle Association told doctors they’re not qualified to have an opinion on gun violence by tweeting, “Someone should tell self-important anti-gun doctors to stay in their lane,” there was a backlash.

Dr. Marianne Haughey, who works in the Bronx, tweeted back, “I see no one from the @nra next to me in the trauma bay as I have cared for victims of gun violence for the past 25 years. THAT must be MY lane. COME INTO MY LANE. Tell one mother her child is dead with me, then we can talk.”

Another doctor tweeted, “Single GSW to the head as a drive by. Surprisingly little blood, but plenty of blood curdling screams from this middle schoolers mother when we told her that her baby was dead. Tell me how do I get her screams out of my head 4 years later?

The NRA was angry that the American College of Physicians issued a paper on firearm injuries and deaths. The paper stated, “Firearm violence continues to be a public health crisis in the United States that requires the nation’s immediate attention. Restrictions should be lifted on gun-violence research conducted by the C.D.C. and other government agencies.”

The NRA accused the doctors of being “biased” and “anti-gun.” Dr. Christine Laine, the editor in chief of Annals of Internal Medicine, replied, “Annals of Internal Medicine is not anti-gun; we are anti-bullet holes in people. And if we are biased, the bias is toward counseling our patients to reduce their risk of firearm injury and toward evidence-based solutions to the public health crisis that firearm injury has become.”

The NRA’s lane is defending the weapons that put bullet holes in people. It’s not their lane where the holes are removed, or where parents are told their children are dead.

The NRA should just park it.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Melania’s Bad Side Can Be A Drag


cjones11172018

Melania Trump is not the first First Lady to influence her husband, the president of the United States. It’s not unusual, unique, or strange.

Sarah Polk helped her husband craft speeches and wrote letters for him. Sarah Fillmore helped create the White House library, which Trump still doesn’t know is in there. Caroline Harrison, a proponent of women’s rights and historic preservation was the first president-general of the Daughters of the American Revolution while she was serving as First Lady. Woodrow Wilson didn’t see anything unless his wife, Edith, approved, as she made daily decisions about what items should or should not be taken to him. Eleanor Roosevelt fought for the New Deal and women’s and civil rights while in the White House. Betty Ford was an advocate for the Equal Rights Amendment and the legalization of abortion (Time called her the country’s “Fighting First Lady,” and many conservatives wanted her to resign, though I don’t know how that would work). Betty even delivered her husband’s concession speech. Rosalynn Carter sat in on cabinet meetings. Hillary Clinton was appointed by her husband to the Task Force on National Health Care Reform and became and still, is a national villain to gaslighted Republicans. Nancy Reagan coordinated her husband’s schedule with an astrological chart, claimed Donald Regan, who was fired as Chief-of-Staff for disagreeing with her.

Normally, a First Lady’s influence on the staff is leaked out from White House insiders and not blasted in a press release stating the equivalent of “I hate their rancid ass and it should be kicked to the curb.” That’s basically what the East Wing issued yesterday in calling for the ouster of deputy national security adviser Mira R. Ricardel. The West Wing issued a response that they had no control over the East Wing. There’s more drama between these wings than left and right Twix.

The statement read, “It is the position of the Office of the First Lady that she no longer deserves the honor of serving in this White House.” No. There wasn’t a “meow” at the end, but she did tweet later about World Kindness Day. Here’s the weirdest part; Ricardel hasn’t been fired yet.

Ricardel is John Bolton’s deputy because that much xenophobia needs an assistant. Three current and two former White House officials said Tuesday that Ricardel had berated people in meetings, yelled at professional staff, argued with the first lady and spread rumors about Defense Secretary James Mattis. Now, I wanna know the Mattis rumors. They can’t be any worse than the president’s Mario-Mushroom rumor.

Chief-of-Staff John Kelly has been pushing for Ricardel’s ouster, but Melania may be pushing for his too.

There are rampant rumors that Homeland Security Director Kirstjen Nielsen and Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke are also on the poop list.

Melania told ABC News in an interview last month that there are some White House advisers she doesn’t trust. It’s nice to know we’re not the only ones except, I don’t trust any of them.

Maybe it’s good for us that Melania is influencing who should stay and go. But, perhaps she should focus on the East Wing a bit more than the West Wing. Not because she’s a woman, but because she has started a campaign she hasn’t engaged in. Her anti-bullying campaign is stark hypocrisy and a national joke since her husband is the most sexist bully this side of Biff Tannen. It would be like Ivanka leading an anti-nepotism campaign.

Personally, I’m looking forward to the future firing and their replacements and their future firings. I’m also hoping Trump acts as his own Chief-of-Staff for a while. But to be honest, I’m also a big fan of train wrecks.

I’m going out right now to buy Melania an astrological chart.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Counting Isn’t Cheating


cjones11162018

Donald Trump refused to believe Russia meddled in the 2016 presidential election, often calling it a hoax. He claims the investigation is a “witch hunt.” He trusted Vladimir Putin’s denial over American intelligence, which is part of his government. He claimed millions voted illegally and created a sham commission, now dismantled, to investigate. He campaigned during the midterms on a caravan invasion that the Democrats created to vote in U.S. elections.

Trump called for a new election in the Arizona Senate race, claiming there was corruption. The race has now been called for Democrat Kyrsten Sinema and her Republican opponent, Martha McSally has conceded.

In Georgia, where the race is still too close to call and counting continues, Trump declared Republican Brian Kemp the winner, “the transition should begin”, and “it’s time to move on.”

In the Florida recount, he claims it’s impossible to get an “honest vote count,” and that a “large number of ballots showed up out of nowhere,” and that we “must go with Election Night” numbers.

Donald Trump wants voting to stop. He wants thousands, if not millions of Americans to have their votes disenfranchised, even service members whose votes are still coming in from overseas. He believes counting every vote after he perceives his side has won, amounts to cheating and election fraud.

Donald Trump is the president of the United States of America, and he doesn’t understand how democracy works. We count votes here in the United States. Every vote should be counted. For that matter, other Republicans don’t seem to understand it either.

Georgia Secretary of State Brian Kemp worked hard to remove African Americans from the voter rolls to prevent them from voting in an election in which he was competing. Florida governor Rick Scott, has also accused the recount of being corrupt, and sent law enforcement to oversee the recount.

Scott’s state government has debunked his and Trump’s accusations of voter fraud and corruption. Sure, Broward County, where they’re still counting, is inept at handling elections, but that doesn’t make them corrupt. Republicans are afraid of voters. They’re afraid of every vote being counted. Voters should be afraid of Republicans. If they can’t win fairly, they’ll cheat. Even when the odds, numbers, and demographics are in their favor, they’ll still cheat. They’re like the New England Patriots, except really racist while cheating.

Donald Trump doesn’t understand how Democracy works. Maybe, in 2020, we can show him.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.