claytoonz

Carving Up Fox News


cjones10252017

Conservatives and Republicans had a field day going after Harvey Weinstein after it was revealed he spent decades using his power in Hollywood to sexually harass young, wannabe starlets.

You would think the people who were silent over the sexual harassment allegations against their idols Roger Ailes, Bill O’Reilly, and Donald Trump would be smart enough to continue to keep their traps shut. They should have had as much to say about Weinstein as they did about former Republican Speaker of the House, Dennis Hastert. In case you need a reminder, they had nothing to say about Hastert and his pedophilia.

I saw a post by a conservative colleague of mine defending Trump, as if everything against him was only allegations. This same guy frequently refers to Bill Clinton as a rapist.

I’ve seen about two dozen cartoons on Weinstein from people who never touched the stories on conservatives, while liberal cartoonists haven’t held back on Weinstein. Donald Trump Jr. tweeted about Weinstein, momentarily forgetting he’s the son of a man who brags about assaulting women, barging in on teenage girls while they’re undressing, and openly cheated on Jr’s mother. Donald Trump himself went after Weinstein, because he’s a shameless hypocrite, and it was easier to discuss than American troops being killed in Niger.

People like Ted Cruz, who voted and supported Donald Trump for president went after Weinstein as if they actually have an issue or care at all about sexual harassment.

When it comes to hypocrisy, nobody beats the sorry excuses for journalists at Fox News, a bastion of hypocrisy.

There was much outrage all over the media, not just over Weinstein’s decades of sexually harassing women, but also over the fact that his company, and an entire industry, allowed him to get away with it. There were clauses in Weinstein’s contract, not that he’d be fired for harassment, but that there would be penalties to be paid.

Fox News didn’t just report on this, a few of their talking fucks had to express their own personal outrage.

I’m not one for giving parenting advice, but to future parents out there I would advise you never name your kid “Tucker.” That kid will grow up to become a bow tie-wearing asshole who says shit like, ““many powerful people knew what Harvey Weinstein was doing, and not only ignored his crimes, but actively took his side against his many victims.” Shit like that is why Tuckers are constantly getting beat up and receiving swirlies.

Let’s play with Tucker’s sentence. ““many powerful people knew what Bill O’Reilly and Roger Ailes were doing, and not only ignored their crimes, but actively took their side against their many victims.” Why didn’t you say that, Tucker?  Do you honestly believe sexual harassment is a partisan issue that is only committed by Democrats and supported by their benefactors? Or, are you just a d-bag, partisan, hypocritical, shameless, idiot?

As it was revealed over the weekend, after Bill O’Reilly settled a sexual harassment lawsuit for $32 million, his employer, FOX FUCKING NEWS, where Tucker Carlson works, rewarded him with a new contract….and the company knew about the settlement. And, they allow fuckers like Tucker to go on the air and bemoan the scandal of movie studios, Hollywood in general, and Democrats of ignoring and taking Weinstein’s side.

But, there’s more. Tucker is not the only hypocritical sorry son of a bitch working at Fox News. Sean Hannity went after Weinstein also and said, “Liberals love to be so sanctimonious, holier than thou, but they’re really hypocrites.” Yes, Hannity. Liberals are the hypocrites here. I’m shocked he could make that statement with a mouthful of Trump’s meatloaf.

Hypocrisy is what Fox News has done. They’ve renewed contracts of known sexual harassers and then allowed these two scumbags to go on the air and bitch about companies who looked the other way for that kind of crap.

Maybe, the jerks at Fox News don’t understand how hypocrisy works. Or maybe, they don’t believe it applies to them.

Or just maybe, they’re afraid if they speak the truth that the old-craggly-ass-stupid-fucker demographic will change the channel.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Advertisements

Hate In The Old Dominion


cjones10242017

There are only two governor races this November, New Jersey and Virginia. The Democrats have a lock on New Jersey, but the one in Virginia is a contest.

Virginia went blue for Hillary Clinton in 2016, and Donald Trump still polls very low in the state. However, the state is not a solidly blue state. It’s purple.

Republican Ed Gillespie is running against Democrat Ralph Northam. Currently, both U.S. Senate seats, the governor and the lieutenant governor are all Democrats. They will most likely outspend the Republicans, but money doesn’t always mean victory. Gillespie is a very dangerous candidate.

Gillespie is a tireless campaigner, hitting every county, and his volunteers have knocked on over a million doors. But, what hurts the Democrats the most is that they are lazy voters in off-year elections.

Mark Warner is a very popular senator. He had high approval ratings as governor. In 2014, every poll had him leading Gillespie by double digits in his bid to win re-election to the Senate. He only won by eight-tenths of a percentage point. This wasn’t due to voters being unhappy with Warner as much as it was to Gillespie knowing how to campaign, and that a lot of Democrats stayed home. They can’t afford to stay home this November.

Gillespie is not running away from Donald Trump, but he’s also not campaigning as a Trump guy. While Mike Pence has campaigned for him, you won’t see Trump in Virginia before election day. While he’s talking about the economy and promising tax cuts, his commercials have mostly been about the dangers of brown people in Virginia. He’s running a campaign based on fear and hate. That tactic has never failed to pull Republicans to the polls.

He’s railing against immigration and scaring people on the threat of MS-13, which is active in Northern Virginia but will probably scare well in Caroline County. He’s also running against sanctuary cities and claiming Northam is in favor of them, despite the fact there are no sanctuary cities in Virginia. That threat is about as real as the war on Christmas. But, boogie men scare Republicans.

While the suburbs of D.C. in Northern Virginia, Richmond, Hampton Roads, Norfolk, Roanoke, and my town of Fredericksburg will vote blue, the rural areas can push Gillespie over the top if Democrats stay home. They can’t take this race for granted. At this time, Gillespie has overcome a 13-point deficit to lead Northam by one point.

Though Gillespie may be silent on Trump, you can be sure Cheeto-in-Chief will claim a victory here as his own and say it’s a referendum. Do you really want to hear him and his sycophants crow about taking a state that voted for Hillary Clinton? I don’t.

Gillespie has been a political operative for George W. Bush and Mitt Romney. Most of his experience has been as a lobbyist. His clients have included Anthem, AT&T, Bank of America, Microsoft (each company having state contracts in Virginia), and Enron. While Enron was defrauding employees and shareholders billions in pensions and stock prices, the company gave Gillespie’s lobbying firm over a million dollars to lobby the Department of Energy and the president to resist efforts to re-regulate the western electricity market during the California Electricity Crisis.

Gillespie has made millions from lobbying. He’ll work on issues that favor those corporations if he wins the governorship. You can bet after he’s governor that he’ll resume lobbying and collect money from those firms. His interests are not our interests, unless you’re really excited about helping this millionaire become a billionaire.

Gillespie’s interests have always been with big corporations, even those who commit fraud. What would make anyone think he cares about the poor or middle class?

We can’t give Donald Trump another ally who wants to erase democracy and install fascism. We can’t award a man for running a campaign based on hate and fear. You can’t stay home.

You need to get out and vote on November 7, and show Trump and his sycophants that Virginia says no to his agenda, racism, nationalism, and fascism. We need to tell Trump Virginia is for lovers and not the haters.

Creative note: Yeah, I was gonna take Saturday night off. But, I’ve been wanting to cover the race in Virginia. I probably will again before election day. I have finished up earlier than usual tonight, and I still plan to watch a movie and eat some ice cream. There’s also an unopened can of Pringles calling my name. Since I am more than one day ahead with cartoons, I’m definitely taking off next Saturday. Probably.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Fascists In Florida


cjones10232017

What kind of nation have we become that now when we hear George W. Bush speak, we think, how enlightening and refreshing it is. It has become the kind of nation where the current president calls black athletes protesting racism “sons of bitches” and folks marching among Nazis “good people.”

When Bush spoke last Thursday, what he said was what our current president is incapable of saying…or even thinking. It would disenfranchise his base, plus he’s not smart enough.

During his speech, Bush said, “we’ve seen nationalism distorted into nativism, forgotten the dynamism that immigration has always brought to America,” and “bigotry and white supremacy is blasphemy on the American creed.”

On the same day, while campaigning in New Jersey and Virginia Obama said, “bigotry seems emboldened. Our politics seems more vulnerable to conspiracy theories and outright fabrication.”

Two former presidents, one Republican and one Democrat, neither would agree on much of anything, except that Donald Trump is bad for America. Donald Trump is blasphemy on the American creed.

Neither president named Trump, but they weren’t talking about your crazy uncle who keeps sharing racist memes and conspiracy theories about uranium deals on Facebook. White House Press Goon Sarah Huckabee Sanders said neither president was talking about Trump because they didn’t mention his name. If you had any doubt the White House is full of stupid people, that should take care of it right there.

One person who isn’t as dense as Sanders on the subject is Steve Bannon. He was furious with Bush. How dare he attack racism and white nationalism. He attacked Bush for reading a speech he didn’t understand and that was probably written by a speechwriter. Let’s forget for a moment that Bannon and his understudy in white nationalism, Stephen Miller has written speeches for Trump, that he can barely read off a teleprompter.

Bannon also said Bush was the “most destructive” president in U.S. history, which is something I would have agreed with before last January.

The racist and white nationalists have become more emboldened since the election of Trump. They were emboldened after the election of Obama, but back then they were more covert by hiding their true intentions under the Tea Party label.

The Tea Party shouted “I want my country back,” and claimed it was about Obama’s heavy spending. They ignored that Bush had wiped out the federal surplus. They held rallies with Alaskan dingbat Sarah Palin. Today, we have a president who is promising to spend more on the military, a useless border wall, and a tax cut for the rich that will hike taxes on everyone else and increase the deficit by $1.5 trillion over the next decade. He is also attacking the First Amendment, engaging in nepotism, and using the government to fund his businesses. How many Tea Party rallies have sprung up since he took office? How many of those same people have shouted “I want my country back” or expressed any concern over government spending? And, just how bad is Sarah Palin that she didn’t get an administration gig with the rest of the stupid people? They hired Ben Carson for fuck’s sake.

I guess it wasn’t about government debt after all. It was about a black guy becoming president. They were upset about a black man being elected president, but have no concern over a president who benefited from Russian meddling in our election, and continues to deny it ever happened. The people who claimed they wanted their country back gave it away. Do you see why I always say that conservatives don’t get irony?

One person who hates black presidents, black people in general, and is emboldened by the election of Donald Trump is Richard Spencer. Spencer is a white nationalist who once said he wants to “bathe in white privilege.” 

Spencer was a part of the Nazi-Tiki march in Charlottesville, and this past week he was allowed to speak at the University of Florida. After the violence and death in Charlottesville, the concern in Florida was so high that the Republican governor declared a state of emergency. The concern wasn’t unwarranted as three men who were making Nazi salutes and Hitler chants shot at protesters.

These Nazi fascists are emboldened. After Trump’s election, Spencer held a rally in Washington, D.C. and shouted, “Hail Trump! Hail our people! Hail victory!” Many in attendance threw up Nazi salutes. In the past, Spencer has said, “the ideal I advocate is the creation of a White Ethno-State on the North American continent.” He’s also stated, “when White men talk about ‘restoring the Constitution’—or, more so, ‘Taking Our Country Back’— leftists and non-Whites are right to view this as threatening and racialist: it implies a return to origins and that the White man once owned America.”

They are only going to get worse. When people asking for equality are “sons of bitches” and Nazis are “good people” in the eyes of the president, we need our elder statesmen to speak out.

It is extremely rare for former presidents to criticize the current president. But right now, remaining silent is criminal. It is dangerous to be silent and allow the white nationalists work to corrupt our democracy.

I want my country back. I also want our former presidents to fight for it with me. Next time, they need to say his name. Don’t let there be any confusion for the stupid people who work in the White House.

This cartoon is my way of punching Nazis in the face.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Kelly Gets Smelly


cjones10222017

Normally, I would feel guilty for using the “he knew what he signed up for” line twice in one week. But, the first Trump cartoon I created with that line won’t be published by most of my clients because it has a giant fat ass in it. Plus, it includes a naked butt.

General John Kelly, the White House Chief of Staff is a man who has earned our respect. It has been believed by many that his presence in the White House is good for the nation as it will restrain Trump from unleashing total stupid hell on the rest of us. The same has been believed about Secretary of State Rex Tillerson, Generals H.R. McMaster, and James Mattis.

Kelly lost his son, Second Lt. Robert Kelly in combat in 2012. The general has gone to great lengths to keep his son out of the public limelight and politics, even as he has served in high-profile positions in government. Thursday, Kelly defended Trump’s call to a Gold Star widow, and he gave a description of what happens to the remains of those killed in combat, and how the grieving families back home are notified. The description was stark, somber, and delivered with a heavy heart. It was one that should be listened to with great respect and appreciation. Then, Kelly lost his shit.

Rex Tillerson refused to answer if he called Trump a “moron.” He didn’t want to play the ridiculous games of Washington or dignify the rumors. Excuse me, Rex, but you work for Donald Trump. Your part of an administration that doesn’t have Jack shit on dignity, and Jack left town. Rex has been neutered by Trump and his credibility was sold with his soul when he signed on with Donald Trump.

H.R. McMaster lost his credibility when he assured us that Donald Trump did not give classified information, provided by an ally, to the Russian ambassador and foreign minister. Then, Trump told us that’s exactly what he did. These generals and titans of business have reduced themselves to the respectability of Sean Spicer, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Kellyanne Conway, and Anthony Scaramucci.

Representative Frederica Wilson claims Trump told the war widow that her husband “knew what he signed up for.” Her account has been backed up by the widow and his family. Trump called her a liar and Kelly did the same thing…as he verified Wilson’s account of what was said. Trump tweeted this morning, “The Fake News is going crazy with wacky Congresswoman Wilson(D), who was SECRETLY on a very personal call, and gave a total lie on content!” Sucking at comprehension as most conservatives do, Trump missed the fact that Kelly actually verified the account given by “wacky” Congresswoman Wilson.

Kelly said, “It stuns me that a member of Congress would have listened in on that conversation — absolutely stuns me.” Yes, it stuns Kelly that someone would listen in on a conversation he listened in on. Am I the only one catching this shit?

Kelly said he was so upset by the politicization of war deaths that he had to take a walk through Arlington National Cemetery. During his walk, did the General contemplate how Trump was the first one to politicize war deaths when he used them to create a contest between himself and President Obama? Did he ponder how Trump was the first one to bring his son into this issue? Did he speculate why Trump would drop a lie that Obama, Bush, or Clinton had never called Gold Star families? Did he think, even for a second, just how utterly stupid and ridiculous it was for Trump to conduct a condolence contest like it’s another episode of The Apprentice? Perhaps, in the back of Kelly’s memory are the instances where Trump said he doesn’t “like people who get captured,” or that they’re “only war heroes because they’re captured,” or the time he feuded with a Gold Star family.  Did any of those events “stun” him?

Kelly didn’t stop his criticism of Ms. Wilson there. He noted that during an emotional 2015 ceremony, Wilson had crassly claimed political credit for getting funding for an F.B.I. building in Miami that was named for fallen agents.

He said, “and we were stunned — stunned that she’d done it. Even for someone that is that empty a barrel, we were stunned.” Apparently, a lot “stuns” Kelly except for Trumpfuckery.

Ms. Wilson has accused Kelly of lying about this occasion and said it’s impossible for her to take credit for the funding of the building since the funding was passed by Congress before she was elected. She has taken and been given credit, for naming the building. Kelly was also off on the amount of funding, but that’s probably not a big deal. What may be a big deal is that many people find the term “empty barrel” racist. It’s new to me, so I can’t say. I Googled it, but every description I found only seemed to describe people who support Donald Trump.

Kelly can be taken seriously when he speaks for the military and about Gold Star families, as he is a member of those families. But, when it comes to defending Trump, Kelly, like Tillerson and H.R. McMaster (and soon, Mattis), is losing all dignity and credibility.

But, hey. He knew what he signed up for.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Me Too Part Two


cjones10212017

Americans are justly outraged over the revelations that Harvey Weinstein spent decades sexually harassing, and maybe, raping actresses. The anger has only intensified as more and more of his victims speak out. It’s even worse now that it’s been revealed his company had clauses in his contract regarding sexual harassment.

In Weinstein’s contract, there were stipulations that he had to pay penalties to his company for each time they paid off an accuser. Most contracts don’t work that way as it’s usually accepted that if you grope people then you’ll be fired, and not treated as if you only ran red lights.

As the #MeToo campaign took over social media, men started to realize just how common sexual harassment is. That was the campaign’s purpose, in addition to making men look into their own behavior. I have looked into my own behavior.

I can honestly tell you I have never sexually harassed anyone at work…as far as I know. I hope I haven’t done it in my personal life. I hope at my very worst, I’ve only been annoying. But, I am positive I have inadvertently made someone feel uncomfortable in the past. For that, I apologize to anyone who I may have ever offended. The last thing I want is for anyone to feel pressure or discomfort from being around me, other than normal reasons to find me unpleasant. I don’t want to be THAT guy, so I will try to keep it in mind for the rest of my life.

I was actually thinking about that over the past few years. It’s OK if everyone else needs the #MeToo campaign. Nobody is perfect, especially me. Sometimes a little push is necessary.

I’m not surprised how many women I know who typed “#MeToo.” I would be more surprised to meet a woman who claims she’s never been harassed. I’ve lived with girls. I have a mother. I have sisters. I have a lot of friends who are girls, and I was never blind to it in the workplace. In almost every instance, I watched the perpetrator get away with it.

And, it seems you’ll have a hard time finding a man who wasn’t sexually harassed. At least, that’s what I’m seeing on social media. Here’s the thing, dudes. The #MeToo campaign wasn’t created for you to hijack it.

I’ve been sexually harassed. I’m sure it’s happened a few times, but only one stands out. It was terrible and made me dread going to work. I actually requested a transfer and I got it. The moral of this is, only the one stands out to me.

Yes, it’s terrible to be sexually harassed whether you’re a man or a woman. But, men are not subjected to it nearly as often. Men don’t face the humiliation nearly as much. Men are rarely put into the position where they don’t have the power, or they’re physically weaker. Men are rarely harassed to the point where they have fear. Even as bad as my situation became, I never had fear. Hell, even when they make a movie about it, the harasser is Demi Moore. So, guys. Shut up. This time, it’s not about you. But, good job of using the #MeToo campaign to perfectly illustrate that you. don’t. get. it.

The other people who don’t get it are the conservatives using the Weinstein issue to promote their agendas. If the agenda is to end sexual harassment, good. Use it. Politicize it. But, that’s not the agenda.

Every political cartoonist has drawn on the Weinstein issue. That includes the conservative cartoonists, but each time they do it, it’s to attack Democrats. One of them has drawn on it three days in a row with the same message (for him, it’s the new Benghazi). I saw another one criticize NBC for not covering the issue…though NBC has been covering the issue. Of course, none of those people criticized Roger Ailes, Bill O’Reilly, or Donald Trump. For them, sexual harassment is a partisan issue. Conservatives don’t get irony or hypocrisy. They rarely get humor.

Donald Trump Jr. is another conservative who doesn’t get hypocrisy. He tweeted at Jimmy Kimmel to tell some Weinstein jokes. Kimmel sent Jr. the Access Hollywood tape where his daddy bragged about grabbing vaginas. Don Jr. once famously said that women who can’t handle a little sexual harassment should go teach kindergarten.

Ted Cruz sent out a tweet that the Clinton Foundation should get rid of all the money Weinstein donated to them. Maybe the charity should donate it to charity.

Then, there are the schmucks at Fox News. Tucker Carlson said, “many powerful people knew what Harvey Weinstein was doing, and not only ignored his crimes, but actively took his side against his many victims.” Is he describing Hollywood and Weinstein, or Fox News and Roger Ailes? Nobody at Fox knew what was going on? Oh wait. They had previous settlements as well. Again, conservatives don’t get hypocrisy.

Sean Hannity said, “Liberals love to be so sanctimonious, holier than thou, but they’re really hypocrites.” Yeah, hypocritical would be politicizing this while having dinner at the White House with Donald Trump, the chief pussy grabber.

Donald Trump said it wasn’t a surprise to learn about Weinstein. It’s not a surprise that Trump can flagrantly wield the sword of hypocrisy, but while Weinstein has been ostracized, after Ailes was fired Trump brought him on as an adviser.

Bill O’Reilly isn’t getting off the hook here. He tweeted at CNN’s Jake Tapper about his low ratings. Tapper replied with, “Low’ would be sexually harassing staffers and then getting fired for it — humiliated in front of the world. Now THAT would be low.”

Low is using the Weinstein issue and neglecting to focus on the victims. If you don’t have anything to say regarding the seriousness of the issue, or even to acknowledge that it’s a non-partisan, maybe you should just shut the hell up.

Next time you see or hear “me too,” maybe you should just listen.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

What You Signed Up For


cjones10202017

Every now and then, someone will purchase a signed print of one of my cartoons. This cartoon probably won’t get any takers. Who wants Trump’s orange ass on their wall, other than Trump sycophants? Mmmmmm…Trump butt.

I get a little self-conscience when I draw several Trump cartoons in one week. I know they make some of my clients nervous, and I should draw on other subjects in addition to Donald Trump anyway. I have a brand new client in Montana, and this will be the first cartoon they receive from me. Let’s hope it’s not the last. “Boy, I can’t wait to see what the new cartoonist sends us….AAAGH!!!”  Though I did receive a first last week and that was an editor submitting a cartoon idea on Trump (which I didn’t use). That may not count though as it was from hippy liberal California.

This cartoon will probably go over great on the internet, but unlike some cartoonists, I’m not working exclusively for Facebook shares (but please share).

One of my policies on drawing Trump cartoons is to make sure the cartoon is about a specific issue, and that it doesn’t merely tell the reader what a horrible human being Trump is. We know he’s horrible. I believe the cartoon should tell us what he did today that makes him so horrible. This one might be bending my rule, though I occasionally break them.

Enough creative notes and my insecurities. Let’s talk about what Trump did today that makes him such a horrible person.

Donald Trump is a horrible person. It’s really hard to find something positive about the guy. When pressed to do so, Hillary Clinton couldn’t do it so she complimented his children…who are also horrible people. Trump is so horrible that the nice things he says about himself usually turns out to be horrible when they’re not actual lies. He’s the kind of guy who, with few exceptions, surrounds himself with horrible people.

So, what did he do this week that was horrible? He fucked up expressing condolences. How in the hell does one mess up giving a condolence? It’s the most unselfish thing you can do. Yet, Donald Trump has to make it about himself, use it to criticize his predecessor, lie about him, turn it into a contest, use the death of his Chief-of-Staff’s son for a political purpose, and when he does finally make the call he tells the widow that her husband “knew what he signed up for.”

Darth Vader probably gave a better condolence call to the widows of the admirals he force-strangled than Trump gave to the widow of the soldier who died in the Niger ambush.

Now, the report that Trump told a Gold Star widow that her husband “knew what he did for, but it still hurts,” comes from a third-hand account. Congresswoman Frederica Wilson, a Democrat from Florida, was present during the call and the phone was on speaker. Wilson personally knew the family and had worked with the slain soldier in the past. Wilson also claims Trump didn’t know her husband’s name.

Trump has responded to the accusation with a tweet. He claims the congresswoman is fabricating the story and he has proof. So who do we believe? The Congresswoman who knew the young soldier, or the guy who threatened he had tapes of James Comey and proof that President Obama was born in another country? Hmmm…decisions, decisions.

But, hey! He’s finally talking about the soldiers who died from the ambush in Niger. Granted, it’s still all about Trump, but he’s talking about it.

Trump does a lot of horrible stuff on a daily basis, so I’m not going to run down everything that makes him such a sack of crap, but let’s bring up a few more where it concerns his “respect” for the military and those who serve.

He attacked a Gold Star family who dared to criticize him at the Democratic National Convention. The day after his inauguration, Trump stood in the lobby of CIA headquarters in Langley, before a wall of stars honoring intelligence officers who died in service, and lied about his crowd sizes. During the campaign, he said John McCain was not a war hero, then said he was only a war hero because he was captured and that he “doesn’t like people who are captured.”

If the soldiers killed in Niger had merely been captured, would Trump not like them and claim they’re not war heroes?

Yesterday, Trump threw a warning at McCain. He was still wearing the unchanged diaper he loaded after McCain criticized his nationalism. Trump told us that right now he’s being nice. He said, “I’m being very nice. I’m being very, very nice. But at some point, I fight back, and it won’t be pretty.”

Nicole Wallace, a former staffer in the George W. Bush administration and McCain’s presidential campaign put it best. She said, “nothing you do is pretty.”

And on that note, I’m giving you a cartoon that is not pretty.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Hazards


cjones10192017

A few weeks before the election last November, I was sitting in a bar drawing a cartoon. No, I wasn’t drinking but I had to draw two cartoons for clients and by no fault of my own (honestly), my home was being smoke bombed to kill bed bugs. Seriously.

I couldn’t drink or even engage in conversations because I needed to concentrate on drawing for The Costa Rica Star and The Seattle Times that day. And, I wasn’t paying much attention to the few people who were around me. I just wanted to focus on my cartoons and steal the establishment’s Wi-Fi. But, what sticks in my memory from that day were the comments made by an older gentleman.

This man had just walked in, and he was obviously a regular and a day drinker. The bartender asked him who he planned to vote for. Usually, you don’t talk politics in a bar, but it was kinda dead and she knew the guy, so the odds of anyone getting a beer bottle broken over the head or a fork stuck in their eye were very low.

The man seemed resigned to voting for Trump. I could have stereotyped the guy as a Trump voter, but he didn’t seem excited about his choices. He didn’t look insane, so maybe I could have had a civilized conversation with him if I had started one, but I don’t campaign to change minds in bars.

When the guy said he was voting for Trump, he elaborated as though he needed a reason other than having a recent lobotomy. He said he was voting for Trump because his son was in the military, and since Trump was a Republican that meant he was pro-military.

That’s an old myth that needs to be eradicated.

I wanted to point out to the guy that Trump had disparaged a POW, a Gold Star family, and had dodged the draft, none of which can be called “pro-military.” But, I was in a bar and on two deadlines, and it’s hard to draw with a fork in your eyeball. I would not have won Hillary a vote that day. I suspect the bartender, a very nice lady, was not voting for Trump, and she took the same tact. She asked the question, and continued the conversation as if she merely wanted to know, not engage in a debate. Maybe she was asking questions to know which patrons deserved a little pee in their drinks.

Back to this old adage that Republicans are more respectful of the military than Democrats; This is as old as the argument that conservatives are more patriotic which also makes me nauseous.

Republicans are only better at the narrative they’re more patriotic, better at foreign policy, better at defending us from terrorism, and care more about those who serve than Democrats. It’s kinda like the false belief they’re better at the economy. The only thing the GOP has been better with over the past several decades is standing on soapboxes, being demagogues over it, and taking credit for Democrats’ accomplishments.

Republicans ignored the warnings before 9/11. Republicans started a wrong war in Iraq. Republicans started a war without any provocation. How well did George W. Bush handle the war in Afghanistan? Who let bin Laden slip away? Which president killed bin Laden?

Which party cuts spending on military pay, VA benefits, and treatment for PTSD? Which party cuts spending on embassy security?

Trump has been very hawkish toward the military. He has equated his prep school to military experience. He has inquired about increasing our arsenal of nuclear weapons. He’s goading “Little Rocket Man.” He’s talked about attacking Venezuela. He’s bombing runways in Syria after giving them a phone call to get out of the way. He’s really good at playing Battleship, but when it comes to the actual duties required of Commander in Chief, all his boats sink.

After Americans were killed in Benghazi, Republicans shouted and screamed about Obama’s and Hillary Clinton’s liability. They held scores of investigations. They’re still screaming about it at Fox News. Two weeks ago, four American soldiers were killed in the nation of Niger. I really wanted to watch Fox News the next day to see who messed up in pronouncing “Niger.”

Trump did not mention the deaths of American service members in Niger until yesterday, after a reporter asked him about the issue at a chaotic press conference. It took Trump two weeks, and only after being pressed on it by the “fake news” to mention the deaths in Niger. When the bodies were returned from Benghazi, Obama and Clinton were at the airport. When the remains from Niger arrived at Dover Air Force Base, Trump’s fat ass was on a golf course.

That’s the logic of Republicans for you. Hate a president for golfing all the time, so elect a president who owns golf courses. Perhaps, Trump would have been there if that voice in his head told him they had died fighting for the national anthem.

Yesterday, Trump talked about how tough it is for him to call families of service members who are killed in the line of duty. He said many presidents didn’t do that, and that Obama never did.

When asked about his lie that Obama never called the families, Trump backtracked and said it was something someone told him. Who told him? That voice in his head?

This truly pissed off former Obama staff members. Former deputy national security adviser Benjamin J. Rhodes said, “this is an outrageous and disrespectful lie even by Trump standards. Also, Obama never attacked a Gold Star family.”

Former Attorney General Eric Holder tweeted, “stop the damn lying. I went to Dover AFB with 44 and saw him comfort the families of both the fallen military & DEA.”

Alyssa Mastromonaco, former White House deputy chief of staff got upset most of all. She tweeted, “that’s a fucking lie. to say president Obama (or past presidents) didn’t call the family members of soldiers KIA – he’s a deranged animal.”

Dotard, moron, deranged animal. Lately, there seems to be an international contest for best Trump insult.

This man has information at his fingertips, yet he will believe something someone tells him based on his desire to believe it. That might be an OK policy for your tinfoil-wearing crazy uncle sharing memes created by Russian trolls on Facebook, but it’s a huge flaw for a president. Presidents, especially in military situations with lives at stake, should work on actual information, not on what they want to believe.

Trump also used the deaths of soldiers to once again attack Obama. How is this supportive of the military? How is this honorable? How is this patriotic?

Former chairman of the Republican National Committee Michael Steele hypothesized that Trump was caught flat-footed by the question. He wasn’t prepared, didn’t expect to be called out on it, and since he hadn’t actually done anything yet, went to his greatest hits which is to attack Obama. Trump had not called the families or written letters to them yet. He said he was going to do it later in the day (two weeks after), and his defense for not doing it yet was to create a lie that other presidents never did what he was going to eventually get around to doing.

There are reports that Trump doesn’t ever call families or write letters, and that he throws it off on military commanders. I’m not sure how comforting it would be for the families to receive a garbled letter written with crayon anyway.

The next time someone talks about Republicans being more patriotic, better at defending America, or how they love the military more than you do, ask them for proof. That old guy in the bar, ask him how he knows this? He said he had to vote for Trump because his son was in the military. I can’t think of a better reason not to vote for Trump. I wouldn’t want to put anyone’s lives in Trump’s tiny piglet fingers, less enough a family member’s.

I’m in favor of Trump playing more golf. Maybe the more time he spends on the back nine will be less time he is asked to make important decisions. Better yet, I think he should take an early retirement for golf. Voting against Trump was a vote for the military and those who serve. If you voted for Trump, you failed at protecting America. Getting Trump out of office now will be the best thing for the military and all Americans.

It’s the patriotic thing to do.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.