Harlan Crow grew up as a trust-fund boarding school baby. Today, he’s a real-estate tycoon who’s Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas’ sugar daddy.

It was revealed a few weeks ago that Harlan has been funding Clarence and Ginni Thomas’ extravagant lifestyle. He’s flown them on his private jets, taken them island hopping on his superyacht, hosted them at his private properties and clubs, paid for other lavish vacations, and has bought them gifts such as a portrait of the two that costs over $100,000 and a bible that once belonged to Federick Douglas at a price of $19,000.

What’s the deal with accepting luxurious vacations from a friend for over two decades? Who does that? I can see taking family members on a vacation, but friends? And for two decades? Clarence is a big boy with a big boy salary. His wife has a salary too. The couple can afford their own vacations. Maybe they can’t afford to superyacht around Indonesia for three weeks (yes, I used “superyacht” as a verb), but they can surely afford a Carnival cruise. Since Clarence said he’s more of a Walmart-parking lot kinda guy than into luxury, and Carnival cruises are really popular with rednecks, he should love it. I hear they have shrimp buffets (I’ve never been on a cruise and I don’t have a billionaire benefactor, but I hear things).

Harlan has been Clarence’s benefactor for over two decades, but rules that took effect this year state that SCOTUS justices must disclose many forms of gifts unless they’re personal, which is a huge ridiculous loophole. Basically, it’s OK if your friend bribes you because then it’s personal. Who defines what a friend is?

Crow argues he’s never tried to influence Thomas and has never discussed issues before the court with him. If you believe that, I’ll sell you a house, or maybe Clarence Thomas will. More on that in a minute. Clarence says that it’s OK to have Harlan as his sugar daddy because Harlan has never had issues before the court. All that is bullshit.

There have been plenty of cases before the Supreme Court that applies to the real estate industry, but also to Harlan’s political interests, not just his financial stakes. Harlan Crow has given over $5 million to GOP candidates, many of whom went on to vote for or against Clarence’s colleagues on the court.

As for it being OK to take bribes from friends, bullshit. Harlan never had any interest in being Clarence Thomas’ friend before 1991, when Clarence became a Supreme Court justice. But whether Harlan is a true friend or not, Clarence Thomas has broken the law by not disclosing gifts from Harlan.

Clarence Thomas co-owned his mother’s house and three nearby empty properties in Savannah, Georgia. On a 2009 financial disclosure firm, he listed the combined values of his stake in the properties at $15,000. In 2014, Crow bought the properties for $133, 363. Crow says he plans to turn all three into a museum celebrating Clarence Thomas’ life. Of course, before he can do that, Clarence’s mom has to move out. Oh, yeah. She still lives there.

I’ve never been a homeowner and I’ve never sold a house (I’m poor and bad with money), but again, I do hear things. What I have heard is that once you sell a house, you move out. Only in “Two and a Half Men” does a house get sold and the former tenants remain (After killing off Charlie Sheen’s character, Ashton Kutcher’s character buys the house, but Jon Cryer and Angus Jones’ characters remain in the house). That’s what I want to do. Buy a house and live with the strangers that come with it…no.

Once Crow bought the properties, he spent $36,000 worth of improvements to Williams’ home, including a carport, a roof repair, a new fence, and gates. Quite frankly, these don’t sound like improvements to turn the place into a museum, but more like gifts to Clarence’s mom, thus, more gifts to Clarence.

Clarence did not disclose this sale. Federal law says that justices and other public officials must disclose real estate sales over $1,000. In case you’re a Republican, $133,363 is more than $1,000. Now Republicans might argue the law doesn’t apply…if you’re a Republican.

Since Clarence’s mom still lives in the house, the $133,363 question is, does she pay rent to Harlan Crow? If so, then how much? I do not expect a clear answer to come from Clarence.

What Clarence needs to do to clear all this up and make it right is to tell us if she’s paying rent, how much, if are there any other gifts from Harlan Crow we’ve yet to hear about…and resign. Resign your seat, Clarence, and before 2024.

Clarence Thomas is corrupt and needs to resign. He’s dishonest, has spent the past two decades sucking at Harlan’s teats, and deliberately failed to disclose the teat sucking.

Now, in the future when you hear a Republican screaming about George Soros donating (legally) to Democratic campaigns and liberal causes, tell them to go eat Crow.

Creative note: I wrote this idea over a week ago but I figured that Clarence’s corruption is still relevant. Also, the Lady Justice statue isn’t really in front of the Supreme Court building, but I bet you didn’t know that. There are two statues in front of the building. The Contemplation of Justice (female) is on the left and the Guardian of the Authority of Law (male) is on the right. This blog is educational, yo.

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