Republicans

The Republican God


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Here’s your cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

I’m going to use this cartoon to digress and rant on something that kinda annoys me.

The thing that annoys me about Trump supporters is that they have to pretend Donald Trump is a lot of things he’s not. Self-made billionaire, smart, honest, great negotiator, non-racist, not corrupt, etc, etc. In fact, I have never heard or read a pro-Trump argument or defense that didn’t contain at least one lie. So, when I hear Christians and Evangelicals praise Trump, I know they’re phonies.

A couple of my Facebook “friends” shared a link to an article about why a Christan can support Donald Trump. Of course, neither of these fine, upstanding Christian men care that the article contains bullshit. The piece, “How Can You Follow Jesus And Support Trump,”  written by a Shane Idleman, is total bullshit. The article is in a publication called Christian Voices which obviously has a low standard for journalism and not something on my regular reading list.

In the article, our author argues he’s in favor of legal immigration but only if the immigrants are “god-fearing.” So right away, he’s in favor of discrimination. He’s too stupid to realize he’s making that argument. My friends are too stupid to realize it also. If you’re arguing that you only want people entering this nation who believe in what you believe, how long until you say you only want people who look like you? But, it’s his choice of what issue to focus on when it comes to defending Trump. He makes the claim that Donald Trump isn’t separating families or putting kids into cages. That’s not just a lie. It’s a lie racists use.

Mr. Christian writing man, if you’re such a great follower of Jesus, then why are you a liar? Yes, Donald Trump separated families after they crossed the border. Yes, he put kids in cages. They even forced minor children to go to court alone. It was part of his policy. He’s on record advocating for this. His Attorney General at the time it began, Jeff Sessions, made a speech announcing the policy and giggled about it to the point I thought they were going to have to administer oxygen to the racist elf. If this policy didn’t exist, then why did a court order them to stop doing it? You’re a liar.

Nowhere in the article does he mention Donald Trump lying, his love for Putin and cheating in an election, grabbing pussies, his racism, or stealing money from a children’s cancer charity. The guy would rather complain that the media is out to get Trump and his supporters. But there’s the thing about that argument, they never point what the media is lying about. Or, at least not successfully. There’s also an argument about socialism which is another huge lie unless the writer is totally ignorant on the subject, which is possible. So once again, another Trump defense based on lies.

If you have to justify your following of Donald Trump, you’re in the wrong. I don’t have to justify who I vote for or the positions I take. Probably because I’m not a lying piece of shit. If you have to lie to support your political positions, then you’re on the wrong side.

These Christians argue they’re getting judges for supporting Donald Trump. But where in the Bible does it say you can trade in your convictions and principles for stuff? I went to church a lot when I was a kid. Really. I don’t remember that sermon. And the other thing about these judges, our Christian friends don’t care by what means they get their stuff. They don’t care if the seats are stolen (and they stole more than one Supreme Court seat) or that you have to cheat in an election to get them.

The thing is, you never had convictions or principles. You were lying then just like you’re a liar now. But we’ve known that for a long time from your silence on government spending when a Republican is in control or from your love of the death penalty while claiming you’re “pro-life.”

The author says they’re not following a man but a movement. Your movement is a cult. You don’t follow Jesus anymore if you ever did (who, by the way, was a socialist). You follow Donald Trump because he’s your god, which he stated when he claimed he’s the “chosen one.” Guess what. That wasn’t mentioned in the article either.

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You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

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Menacing Mittens


cjones02122020

Today, Mitt Romney, Republican Senator from Utah and former presidential candidate, voted to convict Donald Trump on one charge of impeachment. Mitt Romney exercised his conscience, dignity, and independence which are all things the Republican Party had thought they had eradicated. I thought they had eradicated it too.

On Wednesday, every single Republican Senator voted to acquit, not exonerate, Donald Trump on the two impeachment charges the House brought up. Romney voted guilty on one of them.

The majority of the Republican Party consists of cowards and sycophants who pretend those traits are virtues. Donald Trump prefers the GOP to be weak and in fear of his wrath which consists of mean tweets. On Wednesday, Mitt Romney displayed a profile in courage, which is extremely rare in Washington. He will be punished.

Donald Trump wanted a totally partisan vote on his impeachment so he could argue he was exonerated, which he will anyway. While Romney was speaking on the floor of the Senate explaining his vote, Trump was canceling a photo-op before the press. Coward.

Donald Trump Jr. tweeted that Romney should be expelled from the party. Fox News host Laura Ingraham threatened to run against him in four and a half years. The flying monkeys are assembling.

Romney explained he took an oath before God. For all the other Republicans, Trump is their god. How dare he.

Romney, while criticizing the Bidens, stated that what they did weren’t crimes. He was shooting down Trump’s defense team’s arguments. He took down another Republican talking point when he said, “The defense argues that the Senate should leave the impeachment decision to the voters. While that logic is appealing to our democratic instincts, it is inconsistent with the Constitution’s requirement that the Senate, not the voters, try the president.” Mitt Romney may be the only Republican in Washington who’s actually read the entire Constitution and understands it.

Then Romney laid out some facts. He said, “The president asked a foreign government to investigate his political rival. The president withheld vital military funds from that government to press it to do so. The president delayed funds for an American ally at war with Russian invaders. The president’s purpose was personal and political. Accordingly, the president is guilty of an appalling abuse of public trust.” Those are all facts.

Romney made another point every Trump sycophant has refused to recognize. “The grave question the Constitution tasked senators to answer is whether the president committed an act so extreme and egregious that it rises to the level of a high crime and misdemeanor. Yes, he did.”

Mitt Romney is not perfect. I’m really glad he wasn’t elected president, and instead, we got four more years for Obama to build a great economy for an old racist white man to inherit and take credit for. Romney has always stood for the 47% and displayed a lack of understanding of working-class and poor Americans. But that doesn’t mean he’s an evil person. That doesn’t mean he’s dishonest or a liar. That just means he’s not the right guy…until now.

He strongly opposed Trump’s candidacy and delivered a speech mocking the future president (sic). After Trump’s election, he had a discussion over frog legs to be Trump’s Secretary of State that really confused everyone. Donald Trump and Mitt Romney eat frog legs? When he was elected to the Senate, no one was expecting him to be a liberal never-Trumper firebrand, but we were hoping for some independence in the GOP. Finally, we got some.

I drew a cartoon and wrote a column last Sunday about the Cowards of Historic Proportions. I wrote there wasn’t one Republican in the Senate who wasn’t a coward. And while some Republicans privately said they voted to acquit Trump out of fear, it turns out there is one who stood up. I wrote history will remember them all as cowards, but Romney will be remembered for his bravery. While Lindsey Graham, Marco Rubio, Susan Collins, Lisa Murkowski, and Mitch McConnell have cemented their places next to the Vichy French, Romney will be next to Margaret Chase Smith. In this case, I like being wrong.

In that column, I wrote, “The founding fathers didn’t put clauses in the Constitution to protect someone like Donald Trump. They put those clauses in to protect our nation from the likes of Donald Trump.” Maybe Mitt Romney read it.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

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Cowards Of Historic Proportions


cjones02072020

In 1950, as the Republican Party was abandoning what made it the party of Lincoln and well on its way to becoming the party of Nazis, Klansmen, Putin-lovers, and conspiracy-driven fucknuts, Joseph McCarthy, a Senator from Wisconson was in the midst of his red scare campaign. McCarthy was accusing Americans, usually without evidence, of being communist. He worked to smear and ruin careers, often succeeding. He even claimed, without evidence, that our government was filled with communists. He said the State Department alone had 205 members of the Communist Party, which was probably a number he pulled out of his ass.

The Republican Party was full of cowards. They were afraid if they criticized McCarthy, that he’d accuse them too of being communist. Even the president, Dwight Eisenhower, was a coward to McCarthy. He only criticized the Senator privately.

Only one Republican Senator stood up to McCarthy. Margaret Chase Smith was the first woman to serve in both houses of Congress. As a Senator from Maine, she faced scorn and threats from within her own party for speaking her mind and standing up against McCarthy.

In opposing McCarthy, Smith said, “It is high time we stopped thinking politically as Republicans and Democrats about elections and started thinking patriotically as Americans about national security based on individual freedom.”

McCarthy was finally brought down in 1954 over a different scandal after the Senate voted 67-22 to censure him. During the hearings, Army Counsel Joseph Welch famously asked McCarthy, “At long last, have you no decency, sir?” Today’s Republicans have zero.

Margaret Chase Smith was initially on McCarthy’s side even introducing a very unconstitutional bill to outlaw the Communist Party, three years after speaking out against McCarthy. But she’s not remembered for that. What will each of today’s Republicans be remembered for? Not for bravery or putting their country before their party.

Now is a time when one Republican could stand up and cement their place in history. Make no mistake about it, history is not going to be kind to Trump or those who became sycophants to him. Trump will be regarded by historians as the very worst president. Except for Richard Nixon, even our bad presidents have short paragraphs in history books. But even Nixon has positives brought up. Trump won’t have any. History will not praise him for inheriting a strong economy.

You would think at least one Republican in the United States Senate would want to be remembered for being heroic. That at least one would be able to face scorn and mean tweets. That at least one Republican would be willing to lose their seat for standing up for the United States. Nope.

While two Republicans did vote for witnesses, don’t kid yourself. There’s no bravery just because they want to hear more evidence. That’s not voting to impeach Donald Trump. In fact, a few Republicans even said they think Trump is guilty, but they still refuse to oust him or even hear evidence that he did something wrong, even when they say they know he’s wrong. What a bunch of sniveling cowards, like Ted Cruz, a sniveling coward himself, once said of Donald Trump.

Cory Gardner is a Republican from Colorado, a state with the most opposition to Trump that has a Republican in the Senate. He’s more afraid of Trump and his party than of voters in his state. He couldn’t even hear one witness in the Senate trial.

Marco Rubio said he assumes all the allegations are true, so he doesn’t need to hear more witnesses and says he’ll vote to acquit as removing Trump would inflict “extraordinary trauma” on our nation and help Vladimir Putin. Never mind the fact it’s Putin who helped put Trump in the White House. If the allegations are true, that Donald Trump abused his office and tried to bribe a foreign president, then doesn’t it inflict “extraordinary trama” by allowing him to remain? Good job defending America, Little Marco. Is it OK if I call you “Little Marco”? It must be since Trump gave him that nickname and now Marco is kissing his ass.

Retiring Senator Lamar Alexander could have gone down in history fighting the good fight. Instead, he caved. He said Trump is guilty, but what the House charged “does not meet the United States Constitution’s high bar for an impeachable offense.” If bribery doesn’t amount to an impeachable offense, then what does? Alexander says the voters need to make the decision on removing Trump, despite the fact Trump has already cheated in this election. For what it’s worth, Lamar says he’ll be voting for Trump in 2020.  Coward.

Ben Sasse of Nebraska wrote a book called the “Vanishing American Adult” and is considered to be one in the Senate. He said, “Let me be clear; Lamar speaks for lots and lots of us.” CNN’s Manu Raju (the reporter one Republican Senator called a “partisan hack”) asked Sasse directly, “if he believes then that Trump acted inappropriately,” which is what Alexander said of Trump. Sasse refused to be an adult or brave enough to actually say the word “inappropriate” himself. He refused to answer the question. Sasse is another coward for the history books.

Alaska’s Lisa Murkowski claimed she voted against witnesses to avoid a tie vote in the Senate and to bravely protect Chief Justice John Roberts from breaking the tie. Murkowski successfully framed herself as just another Republican coward.

If President Barack Obama refused to give the House any documents and even told Hillary Clinton not to testify during their multiple Benghazi investigations, do you honestly believe that not one of these Senate Republicans would have been calling for his impeachment…or voting that way if there was a trial? This isn’t about the presidency, Constitution, or what impeachable or not. It’s about 53 United States Senators being cowards, lackeys, lickspittles, and asskissers. It’s about 53 United States Senators putting a cult of rancid personality over the oath they took to protect this nation from a person just like Donald Trump.

The founding fathers didn’t put clauses in the Constitution to protect someone like Donald Trump. They put those clauses in to protect our nation from the likes of Donald Trump.

Donald Trump is a vile, disgusting human being. You shouldn’t want him in your house, less enough the White House. In allowing, excusing, ignoring, and even defending his lack of decency, the Republican Party has abandoned theirs. History won’t remember any of them as heroes because there aren’t any. But history will list each and every one of them for the cowards they are.

At long last, have you no decency, Republican Party?

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire

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Spin On This


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Here’s your cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

Several Republican senators said they were learning new information during the impeachment arguments from the House managers. They were shocked to learn new details about Trump’s corruption. Why is this? Because they don’t want real news or bother reading anything that might contradict their dogma.

It’s terrible that Trump supporters, members of his cult, don’t deal with facts. When you point out out a fact to them, like Donald Trump stole from a charity or said a veteran is only a hero because he got captured, it’s news to them. Try telling the cult Donald Trump has told over 16,000 lies since becoming president and watch the expression on their faces while they try to compress the information. But it’s terrible when United States Senators, people who took an oath to fight for and defend this nation, refuse to hear facts. A Republican senator, Martha McSally or Sally McMartha (we’ll figure it out right after we find Ukraine on a map) screams at a CNN reporter for asking her a question, insults him by calling him a “liberal hack,” then goes straight to Laura Ingraham’s show on Fox News to talk about how terribly the media treats her by asking questions.

I saw a post last week where a cultist was defending Republican senators like Lindsey Graham who kept walking out of the hearings, by stating Democrats had walked out too. Yeah, but the argument the House managers are making isn’t new to the Democrats. As I’m watching the hearings, I’m only hearing details I already knew. Why did I already know this? Because I haven’t had my head stuck in the sand.

On Saturday, I knew everything the Republican defense was laying out, and I don’t even watch Fox News. Of course, it helped that everything they said were lies Donald Trump had already said. There weren’t any new lies.

We also learned that in the absence of electronic gadgets, some senators are playing with fidget spinners. Senator Richard Burr handed them out to his colleagues and who spent their time, instead of paying attention to the House managers, trying to figure out how the spinners worked.

Republicans don’t just naturally excel at being ignorant and uninformed. They put a lot of work into it.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Damn Skippy The Fix Is In


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Here’s your cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

This is very similar to the oath cartoon I did last week but in this version, I give them a different oath. It’s an oath where they promise to be corrupt. The trial has started today and Mitch McConnell has already broken his oath.

McConnell wants to ram the entire thing through so that the bulk of it happens late at night, perhaps until 1:00 a.m. He’s hoping Americans stop paying attention. If voters pay attention, it’s not good for Republicans.

It’s not good because the majority doesn’t just want to hear witnesses. A majority wants Trump removed from office. It’s not good for Republicans for Americans to pay attention because they may hear the evidence, and Donald Trump is guilty. Donald Trump should be removed from office. The facts don’t help Donald Trump or Republicans.

Republicans have the majority in the Senate and they still need to fix the trial. They violated their oath before they ever took it.

Yesterday’s cartoon was on Trump goons. In a way, this one is too as each of the 53 Republicans in the United States Senate has chosen to participate in Trump’s coverup. Each of those senators has chosen to be a Trump goon.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Liberal Hack Journalists


cjones01252020

Last week, temporary Arizona Senator Martha McSally screamed at CNN congressional correspondent Raju Manu, calling him a “liberal hack.”

Later, McSally went on Fox News to talk about her harrowing experience of being asked a dangerous question by a liberal hack reporter. The Fox News hosts she chose to talk to about hacks in the media were Laura Ingraham and Sean Hannity. Nobody detected the irony and hypocrisy.

While screaming over it, Hannity said about CNN, “They’re not a news channel. They’re state-run, radical, leftist, socialist TV.” Again, no irony detected. A person has to be smart to catch that.

McSally said to Sean, “I actually thought they understood that they were liberal, that they were a part of kind of helping with the Democrat agenda.” Hello? Irony? Is this thing on?

Now, McSally, the unelected Senator, is campaigning on it. She has an ad on her site asking for at least five bucks. Even the Trump campaign is using it.

In decrying the way she was assaulted by Manu Raju, she said to Hannity, “I was a fighter pilot. This was a choice I made. I did not crumble under their pressure. I have flown A-10s in combat.”

It’s a good thing too that she has that experience in combat so she won’t crumble under the pressure of being asked….”should the Senate consider new evidence as part of the impeachment trial?” Oh my God! How is she still standing? The strength of this woman to continue to carry on despite the brutal beatdown of being asked a question about her job! What will they ask next? The time? How’s the weather? Do you bleach above your upper lip?

Hold your children close tonight and keep Republicans like Martha McSally in your thoughts and prayers because if I know the liberal hack media like I think I do, they’ll ask questions again. Oh, the humanity!!!

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

To Solemnly Lickspittle


cjones01192020

I spent last Thursday morning nauseous and queasy from food poisoning. This morning, I was looking up photos of Senate Republicans, so yeah…another Thursday morning feeling nauseous and queasy.

Senate Republicans have already abandoned the oath they swore to when they took office. You know, that quaint idea of protecting and defending the United States of America from all forms of aggression, foreign and domestic. Because with Donald Trump, our nation’s received forms for aggression, foreign and domestic. How have Senate Republicans responded to it? They’ve all rolled over for belly rubs.

On the 2016 campaign trail, Donald Trump gave loyalty oaths at his hate rallies. He defended the practice from comparisons to the oaths Hitler demanded as “fun.” Republicans in Congress haven’t had a problem with the oath, at least not since the election. Before Trump was elected was another matter.

Lindsey Graham said of Trump, “He’s a race-baiting, xenophobic, religious bigot,” and “You know how you make America great again? Tell Donald Trump to go to hell.” Now, he promises not to be a fair juror in Trump’s impeachment trial which is starting next week and said “I’ve clearly made up my mind, I’m not trying to hide the fact that I have disdain for the accusations and the process.”

Ted Cruz called Trump a “pathological liar” and a “sniveling coward” after Trump retweeted a meme comparing the beauty between their wives. Now, he’s defending coming to a conclusion before the trial.

Marco Rubio said, “No senator can be impartial.” Back in 2016, he was making fun of the size of Trump’s penis.

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell has resisted calling witnesses, despite new ones coming out every day stating how Trump was trying to bribe a foreign leader to help his reelection. McConnell is totally coordinating the trial with the White House.

This morning, Senate Republicans are going to take an impeachment oath they’ve already promised to break. You can argue that Democrats are doing the same, but at least they can base their opinion that Trump is guilty on the fact that all the witnesses, documents, and facts support that Trump is guilty.

And the Republicans who are promising to be openminded will only do so if they don’t have to hear any more witnesses or evidence against Trump. The only way this could be any worse would be if we found out later that one of the Senators was helping Trump bribe Ukraine. But fortunately, the guy who did that in Congress is in the House.

The impeachment trial of Donald Trump beings next week and should continue for two more. But this morning, Republicans will get a head start by swearing on an oath they don’t have any intention to follow. At the same time, they don’t have any intention of representing the United States.

Creative note: Can’t recognize all the Republicans and wanna give up? Here you go. Left to right (top row); Tom Cotton, Rand Paul, Rick Scott, Joni Ernst, Jerry Moran, Ben Sasse (bottom row) Mitch McConnell, Lindsey Graham, Ted Cruz, Cindy Hyde-Smith, John Kennedy (very bottom) Marco Rubio.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.