Republicans

Angel Of Bannon


cjones10312017

Steve Bannon might just be Mitch McConnell’s worst nightmare. Not so much that he can remove him as Majority Leader of the Senate, but that he may run enough racist, right-wing, lunatic, freakazoids who will make the GOP lose the actual majority.

Let’s take a look at Alabama where Democrats never, ever, ever, ever, ever win…and thanks to Steve Bannon, they’re leading in the polls.

Right-wing extremists are the majority of voters in Republican primaries. In 2010, they gave the Senate nomination to Joe Miller in Alaska, only to lose to the incumbent Republican, who he beat in the primary, by a write-in ballot. People who are normally too lazy to even vote, got off their ass and wrote in “Murkowski” on a ballot. Alaskan voters hated the idea of Miller so much that they got off their asses and learned how to spell “Murkowski.” This is a state that thought making Sarah Palin governor was a great idea.

Roy Moore is the lunatic backed by Bannon in Alabama. He ousted the incumbent in a special primary election and now the race is tight. Alabama may not want to send a bleeding-heart liberal to represent them in the United States Senate, but they may be able to live with a moderate Democrat over a judge who was kicked off the bench twice.

Bannon is now aiming his sights on Mississippi, Nevada, Arizona, and Wisconsin. And, despite the racist wolf-whistle ads by the Republican nominee for Virginia’s governor, he wasn’t Bannon’s pick. That guy was even scarier.

If Bannon’s guys win their primaries, then Democrats may take seats in states where they didn’t stand much of a chance. The Republicans may lose their majority. Of, if they have enough victories, they can make life really hard on McConnell, and even worse…encourage more racist Bannon/Trump goons in the future.

Can you imagine the Senate full of racist idiots who don’t know how anything works? What about governors across the nation?

This is why Democrats and Independents need to vote in off-years and mid-term elections. While it might be fun to see the chaos and draw cartoons about it, it’s worse for our nation. Nobody wants to see America resemble 1930 Germany.

Don’t let these idiots win their elections. It’s bad enough now that we have to get rid of the big orange one sitting in the executive branch.

Creative Notes: I was working on a cartoon about the JFK Files and then I was struck with this idea. I’m planning on taking Saturday night off for a movie and ice cream, so I was going to put this Halloween cartoon off until Sunday night and publish it Monday morning. Then I realized that the cartoon I was working on was dated for the 31st, Halloween. That meant the Halloween cartoon would be dated for November 1st. I felt weird dating a Halloween cartoon for November, even though a lot of cartoonists will continue drawing Halloween cartoons the first week of November. I hate those. Hell, I saw a Thanksgiving-themed cartoon earlier this week. It also occurred to me that if editors like this cartoon, then they probably need to receive it today.

That’s all the geeky business side of cartooning. I do like the other cartoon I was working on so I’ll probably finish it. It’s already lettered.

Last creative note: The kid as the mummy was a late addition to this cartoon. I realized I can’t remember the last time I drew a mummy and then I really wanted to draw a mummy.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

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Normalize This


cjones10282017

Retiring Senators Jeff Flake of Arizona and Bob Corker of Tennessee have both denounced Donald Trump’s recklessness, divisiveness, undignified and dangerous behavior while continuing to support his agenda.

Both Senators supported Trump for president and today they openly oppose him (while voting to strip banking regulations and repeal Obamacare). Why do they oppose him now? Trump being a stupid ass of a human being who behaves like a toddler isn’t new. He ran his entire campaign that way. His rhetoric on the trail alerted all of us that he would go beyond merely being a disappointment as president, but that he would become an unhinged temperamental madman engaged in public hissy-fits while having the nuclear launch codes.

Both Senators are fed up with the lies. Trump’s lies are also not a new development.

Flake and Corker want every Republican in the United States Senate to do now what Flake and Corker should have done over a year ago. Denounce Trump and not allow him to become the new normal. Couldn’t they have done something beforehand to stop this? Did they not see the tape where he makes fun of a handicapped reporter?

Flake told the press that other Republicans will join him and Corker in resisting Trump. Then, the second-ranking Republican in the Senate, John Cornyn, endorsed Roy Moore, the lunatic gun-packing Republican in Alabama who doesn’t know what DACA is and believes that kneeling while the national anthem is playing isn’t legal. Jim Risch, Republican Senator from Idaho said it’s “not my job” to call out Trump when he lies. Is it his job to protect the United States?

America-First Republicans are actually Trump-First Republicans.

Flake and Corker hate the new normal, so they’re leaving which will make the United States Senate an even more extreme alt-right environment. Steve Bannon is working to replace both men with wingnuts like Roy Moore. It’s his dream to have 51 Ted Cruz’s in the Senate.

The Republican Senate is full of cowards, and Flake and Corker are no exceptions. They’ve only denounced Trump after they decided they won’t seek re-election. What we’re going to be left with is a body full of sycophant lackeys who will disregard the best interest of the nation in favor of a man-baby with a loaded diaper.

And, I’m going to start campaigning that we change how we pronounce “sycophant.”

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Bannon’s Blue Chips


cjones10122017

Former White House chief strategist, head of Breitbart, and poster boy for nationalism Steve Bannon isn’t just trying to redesign the Republican Party into his racist image, he’s trying to do that to America.

Bannon’s politics are so warped to the right, he was against Trump picking Christian zealot and homophobe Mike Pence as his V.P. pick. Say it with me now. Yikes!

Bannon’s first success in electing a nationalistic bigot was Donald Trump. Unfortunately for Bannon, Trump’s only true ideology and passion are Donald Trump. Plus, he’s an idiot. Bannon will need to stack the United States Senate with racists and Nazi sympathizers if he wants to see the United States truly become an authoritarian state subservient to one master.

Inspired by Roy Moore’s primary win in Alabama, Bannon has promised to make every Republican senator face a far-right candidate in their primaries. Well, every Republican senator except Ted Cruz, because he’s horrible enough. Bannon is also targeting Congress and is supporting a former-congressman and felon who’s running for the last Republican-held seat in New York City.

The only problem Bannon may have with the type of candidates he prefers is that they also tend to be kinda stupid. Roy Moore didn’t even know what DACA is and had to have a radio show host explain it to him. Perhaps, after the candidates assume office they can call Bannon who will tell them how to vote.

Bannon envisions an authoritarian nation that rules instead of governs. He wants a government where the head of state’s authority won’t be questioned, and the legislative branch is a paper tiger that folds at his will. The only reason current Republican officeholders are subservient to Trump is that they are afraid of his base. While Trump’s disapproval ratings among people who are not total maniacs hover around 70%, his approval among those who voted for him is around 90%. These are people satisfied with the job performance of a man who has yet to do his job. And, people who voted for Trump are OK with racism.

Bannon wants to replace Republicans who don’t play nice with Trump and don’t share his vision of a culture war and race-baiting politics. Bannon promised to “cut off the oxygen” to Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell and stop his fundraising for establishment candidates. He’s also called for Senator Bob Corker to resign because he had the gall to question Trump’s ability to serve as president.

He said Corker’s comments about the White House being run like a daycare center are unacceptable, and he had the “audacity” to make those comments to The New York Times. For Breitbart, a propaganda machine, an actual news source that informs people are the enemy.

Bannon said Republican incumbents have committed “economic hate crimes” against the “forgotten man.” What the hell is an economic hate crime? Also, when he says “forgotten,” he means white.

Bannon is declaring “war” on the GOP establishment and all those that don’t back what Trump ran on. He said there is a “new game in town.”

Bannon’s “war” isn’t just on the GOP. It’s on all of us who don’t want a xenophobic, nationalistic racist nation run by complete dumb-asses.

Democrats can’t be fooled into believing that scary, freaky far-right Bannonites toppling establishment Republicans is good for them. First off, the Democratic Party doesn’t have their act together. While they may find a few opportunities in Arizona and Nevada if those incumbent senators are defeated, there’s not much they can do in places like Alabama.

There are eight Republican-held Senate seats up for re-election in 2018. Expect Bannon to target Arizona, Nevada, Utah, Mississippi, Wyoming, Nebraska, and Tennessee. Bannon may also support candidates in states the Democrats are defending, like Florida, Missouri, Montana, North Dakota, Ohio, Indiana, Michigan, West Virginia, Pennsylvania, and Virginia (I won’t let Virginia happen).

We already have Ted Cruz in the Senate and Roy Moore is likely to join him. Can you imagine how truly horrible it will become if six or seven more like them are elected?

Putin will be so happy.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Nazi The Equivalence


cjones09032017

At the start of World War II, nearly every Scandinavian country declared neutrality. It only worked out for Sweden. Norway and Denmark were invaded by Germany. Even Iceland didn’t escape, and they were invaded by the good guys when England stormed their shores in what should become a comical movie (go read up on it).

Finland may be the most interesting case. At the start of the war they were opposed to Nazi Germany, as Hitler was aligned with the Soviet Union, Finland’s enemy. Finland attempted to build a defense structure with help from England, to no avail. After Hitler betrayed Stalin, Finland found itself on the same side as the Nazis. This was most peculiar because Finland didn’t send their Jewish population to German concentration camps (many fought for Finland), and they were the only Axis nation that was also a democracy.

Technically, democratic Finland was an enemy of the allies, including the United States. Finland actually succeeded in defending their homeland from the Soviet Union, and never initiated the war, or invaded anyone. However, they still had to pay a cost as they lost ten percent of their land, including their second largest city, and pay war reparations, even though they weren’t the belligerents.

Why did they get lumped in with the bad guys and have to lose so much when all they really wanted to do was protect their homeland? Because they sided with Nazis.

If you’re a conservative or have friends who complain about protesters and activists and throw all the attention on Antifa, or Black Lives Matter, then they’re siding with Nazis too.

Why are conservatives and Republicans more focused on people against fascism and who want cops to stop engaging in police brutality? Because Nazis are closer in alignment to Republican beliefs. That’s not a group you want on your side, so conservatives’ best defense (in their little minds) is to deflect, ignore, and engage in false equivalence.

And, it is a false equivalence but, let’s patronize it for a minute and look at our players.

Black Lives Matter is protesting for an end to police brutality, and are asking for more community oversight of police departments, stricter limits on the use of force, independent investigations of police misconduct, community representation in municipal governments, body cameras, better training, an end to “policing for profit,” demilitarization, and union contracts that don’t protect misbehaving police officers from being held accountable. Seriously, they should not even be in this conversation, but asshole conservatives placed them here.

Antifa is more complicated. Antifa is hard to understand as they don’t understand themselves. There is not a national Antifa organization. It can basically include anyone who is against fascism. Some who label themselves as Antifa do engage in violence and vandalism, such as punching alt-right dickheads and trashing their local Starbucks. While Indiana Jones makes punching Nazis look like an erstwhile endeavor, it’s not something I condone. And, I’ve yet to meet a liberal who wouldn’t get upset if his or her local Starbucks was firebombed. There is a huge difference between being a liberal who really dislikes Donald Trump and anarchists who hurt people and break stuff. The objective of ending fascism is a noble one and I believe we can achieve that goal without torching my favorite spot to get a large mocha (or is it “grande’?”).

So, anarchist who engage in violence and vandalism, cut it out. It really hurts your cause more than it helps…as in, it doesn’t help at all. If anything, it helps Nazis because it gives them footage from Breitbart to share on Facebook.

When you look at the objectives of our three groups here, the equivalence is false. I don’t see a fair comparison between people who want to end police violence and fascism, and assholes who strive for racial superiority who march with tiki torches while shouting “Jews will not replace us” and “blood and soil.” At their very worst, Antifa is punching people and breaking windows while Nazis are driving cars into crowds of people and killing them.

We can denounce the violence committed by some members of the Antifa community, if it is an actual community. I’m not on the email list and I don’t get a newsletter. But, if your focus is on Antifa and not on Nazis or the KKK, you’re enabling the racist.

Pointing and screaming about Antifa may deflect attention from where you’re standing for a while, but eventually, people are going to notice when that spot where you’re standing is among Nazis.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Kollege Is Shtoopid


cjones07152017

Shortly after the invasion of Iraq, Vice-President Dick Cheney was asked about opinion polls reflecting that a majority of Republicans believed Iraq was behind 9/11. Cheney said he could understand why people believe that, but he wouldn’t state that Iraq didn’t have any involvement with that terrorist attack. Why not? It’s because his agenda fed off of an ignorant base. Basically, stupid people.

Part of Russia’s meddling in our election to plant a dumbass in the White House required them to spread bogus stories all over the internet, which was shared like wildfire by trolls on social media. It helped that the audience they were targeting were Republicans because that meant the stories couldn’t be too stupid.

They spread bogus stories like the Pope and Denzel Washington had endorsed Trump, Hillary Clinton was a criminal suffering from serious health issues, there would be violence if Clinton won, election rigging, fake ballots in Clinton’s basement, and that Clinton was running a child-sex trafficking ring out the basement of a pizza shop that didn’t have a basement.

When it came to sharing the fake stories, Republicans were useful idiots. Some members of the Trump campaign even shared the fake stories, including Trump himself.

Today, a majority of Republicans believe millions voted illegally for Clinton and that Trump won the popular vote. They probably still believe Obama was born in Kenya. These are the people who put an idiotic, crooked narcissist in the White House.

Conservatives love to whine how the press has a liberal bias. I’m asked occasionally “why are you so liberal?”. My views are liberal because I base them on facts. The press has a bias for facts and the truth is biased toward liberalism. Climate change is real, Hillary won the popular vote, there were not millions of illegal votes cast, Trump did not have the biggest inauguration crowd ever, and Obama did not have Trump Tower wiretapped. Sorry, conservatives. Facts hurt.

Facts hurt so much that Republicans have to make shit up about their opponents like Obama was invading Texas, or that more Americans are uninsured since Obamacare was implemented. If you watch Fox News, read Breitbart, the Daily Wire, Daily Caller, or InfoWars, you will be fed a lot of lies. That’s because facts don’t work for a conservative audience.

A new Pew Research Center poll released Monday revealed that a majority of Republicans think that colleges have a negative impact on the country. Fifty-eight percent of Republicans now say that colleges “are having a negative effect on the way things are going in the country.” That kinda adds up since Democrats capture the majority of college educated voters.

Cost is not the biggest reason Republicans oppose free college education for everyone. If voters are educated, that’s bad for the GOP. The fact that Donald Trump is actually the freaking president of the United States of America is all the proof you need that this is true. Smart people didn’t put Trump in the White House.

My advice is: Read newspapers. Knowing things is good.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $50 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Muscling In Montana


cjones05282017

The non-partisan Congressional Budget Office has issued their report on the Republican’s tax cut for the rich disguised as a health care plan, and it’s not pretty.

House Republicans were so anxious to repeal Obamacare and pass their joke of a replacement that they didn’t wait for the report on their plans impact. As it turns out, it may leave over 23 million Americans without health insurance. So quite naturally Republicans don’t want to talk about it.

One Republican who is real testy about it is Greg Gianforte. Gianforte is a candidate for Montana’s lone Congressional seat that should be a walk in the park for the GOP. Montana is a red state and when Trump put their congressman in his cabinet along with all the other white guys, the party just assumed it was their seat to keep. Wrong.

With Trump in the White House Americans, even in red-meat eating red states, are realizing the guy is a disaster. With Republicans stealing everyone’s health care to make sure millionaires and billionaires become richer, those seats are getting harder to hang onto. Democrat Rob Quist supports the Second Amendment and he wears a cowboy hat. He has a slim chance of winning the Montana Congressional Seat, especially now that Gianforte is beating up reporters.

Gianforte was giving an interview to a local station when Ben Jacobs, a journalist with The Guardian, interrupted to ask questions about the CBO report, which Gianforte has been ducking. Gianforte’s response, according to several witnesses (some with Fox News even) grabbed Jacobs and body-slammed him against a wall, and broke his glasses. It was also captured on a recording.

The candidate has been charged with a misdemeanor assault. The big question this raises is will it affect the outcome of the election, which is tomorrow (Thursday). The two largest newspapers in Montana, the Missoulian and the Billings Gazette, both retracted their endorsements of Gianforte.

Gianforte’s campaign issued a statement blaming Jacobs for being aggressive and described him as a “liberal journalist.” I suppose assault is bad to Republicans unless you’re assaulting a liberal journalist. After all, Donald Trump has described the press as “enemies of the American people.”

I don’t know if this will change anything. Voters didn’t seem to care that Donald Trump was a bully and encouraged violence and assaults at his rallies. Maybe Montanians will like the idea of a congressman who beats up journalists.

What’s next? Gianforte broke Jacob’s glasses (nerd!). Maybe Republicans will start shoving reporters into lockers and giving them swirlies and wedgies.

Creative note: I was more of a Mad Magazine fan when I was a kid and didn’t read comic books much. The only two I did get into for a while was Spiderman and The Hulk. I think every political cartoonist enjoys drawing Hulk.

I was getting a later start than I had planned last night. I was halfway through my first cartoon when this idea hit me. It was all over the news, especially MSNBC. I bounced it off a friend and former FLS colleague and she thought I should go with it. Around midnight I started all over again.

Clay smash first idea. Clay start over. Clay tired. Clay drink too much coffee.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

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Do Your Job


cjones02142017

Do your job. That’s what attendees of a town hall conducted by Utah congressman Jason Chaffetz shouted at him last week.

The crowd is upset that the congressman has failed to hold the president accountable for his hateful and dangerous policies. The funny thing is neglecting to do his job didn’t begin after Trump was sworn into office. Chaffetz has spent the bulk of his time engaging in pointless investigations into Benghazi and Planned Parenthood, and trying to end legal marijuana and gay marriage in the nation’s capital.

Chaffetz later accused the crowd of being paid protesters and said he may not provide a venue in the future for “radicals” to further intimidate him. The snowflake provided no proof anyone was paid to attend, shout, and harass him.

I’m on a lot of political mailing lists for conservatives and liberals. Every week someone invites me to join political groups, events, and protests. I hear a lot but I’ve yet to be offered any money to attend a protest or hear from anyone who has. What up with dat?

Despite doing it pro bono, people are showing up to Republican town halls to yell “do you job,” “shame,” and to question their representatives. And to Chaffetz’s credit, at least he actually showed up.

Other Republicans have scheduled town halls and have failed to show up or they have sneaked out the back after seeing they weren’t going to be greeted with cheers and showered with adoration.

If nothing else they could always do what Donald Trump does and make up numbers and claim everyone present was there to cheer them. Though Trump is into a different kind of showering.

Democrats are trying to emulate the Tea Party in building a base for the midterm elections. There’s just one problem with that and it’s the fact Democrats are lazy during midterms. Conservatives are very loyal to the GOP, even when they throw out their incumbents for newer scarier Republicans (How ya’ doing, Eric Cantor? I miss drawing you). Liberals aren’t as loyal to the Democratic Party. A great many of them are independent and feel burned by the party. Go ask a Bernie supporter how he feels about Hillary’s candidacy or Debbie Wasserman Schultz (I miss drawing her).

Another issue is that during the 2018 midterm elections there are 33 seats up for election. Currently 23 of those belong to Democrats and two independents who caucus with the Dems. Republicans only have nine. A lot of these, even for the Democrats, are in states that voted not only for Trump in 2016, but for Romney in 2012.

I expect the Democrats to make gains in the House but they can actually lose seats in the Senate. Even if the Republicans burn the nation to the ground before then.

Creative notes: You gotta know this cartoon is a Blues Brother reference. Just in case you don’t (what’s wrong with you?) I will explain. Warning! Spoilers ahead (and I still haven’t seen Rogue One).

The Blues Brothers steal a gig from a country band at Bob’s Country Bunker, and they tell Bob they are the “Good Ole Boys” band. Bob’s Country Bunker features both kinds of music, “Country” and “western.” As the boys go into their first song, which is neither “country” nor “western,” the crowd becomes rowdy and starts throwing beer bottles at the band. Fortunately for the band the stage is erected behind a protective layer of chicken wire.

The boys appease the crowd by playing the “Theme To Rawhide” and “Stand By Your Man.” The audience loves it yet they continue to hurl bottles at the band.

When I played in bands I never had to play behind chicken wire or dodge beer bottles. But I have been in the predicament The Blues Brothers found themselves in at the end of the night where the band actually owes the bar money because of all the beer they drank. However my bands have always paid the tab and didn’t finish the evening with a high-speed chase pursued by an RV full of angry Good Ole Boys.

I anger and get pursued by good ole boys for other reasons.

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