Republicans

Something To Smite About


I am so looking forward to the impending Trump/DeSantis war. DeSantis is trying to blow off Trump’s attacks as just “noise” because he knows it’s too early to attack Trump. Nobody but Trump needs to start officially running for president right now. DeSantis and everyone else can wait about a year before creating official campaigns. DeSantis is exhibiting just how better disciplined he is than Trump by holding off for now, but the time will come when DeSantis will have to run against Donald Trump, and that will require attacking him.

Donald Trump is a god for the Republican base and they have become a cult. DeSantis is very popular with the same base, but how will the cult respond when DeSantis attacks their deity? I hope he goes the Marco Rubio route and tells them Trump has a tiny penis.

That’s it for today’s blog, kids. It’s Sunday and I spent about six hours on this cartoon. I’m flying back to the east coast in the morning and I have a lot to do before that. Later.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

FIFA Florida


When I started this cartoon, it was just a joke and creative license that the next World Cup will be held in Florida, but guess what. In 2026, the next World Cup will take place in Florida, at least part of the tournament anyway.

There have been a lot of protests against FIFA holding this year’s World Cup tournament in Qatar, a Persian Gulf nation with a horrid record on human rights, whether it comes to women, LGBTQ+, migrants, etc. Qatar is an autocratic regime that also suppresses a free press. Part of FIFA’s excuse for holding the tournament there is that all the nations in the Persian Gulf region are like this.

Some of the teams competing are displaying protests on their uniforms which has outraged conservatives here in the USA because athletes shouldn’t protest for equality. To them, athletes should only speak their minds when sharing conspiracy theories about Covid and vaccines.

FIFA announced that any athlete wearing a “one love” armband will receive a yellow card which I think is a penalty of some sort in soccer, oops, football.

In 2026, the World Cup will take place in 16 cities in Canada, Mexico, and the United States. One of those cities will be Miami and in case you’re a Republican, that’s in Florida.

The governor of Florida is working overtime to make his state an autocracy, and in case you’re a Republican, that’s a government run by one person. Ron DeSantis has fired elected officials. He personally re-drew congressional districts in his state. He’s personally picking and choosing what books are allowed in public schools. He has attempted to outlaw “wokeness,” which is an attack on free speech. He’s punishing corporations that don’t agree with him. He’s banned teaching Critical Race Theory in schools which has never been taught in public schools. He’s the champion of the “Don’t Say Gay” bill. He signed a law making it legal to hit Black Lives Matter protesters with your car. He’s deporting immigrants to sanctuary cities… from Texas.

Of course, DeSantis won’t be governor of Florida in 2026, unless he personally changes the state constitution which I wouldn’t put past him. The most horrifying outcome will be if he’s president in 2026.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Big Fat Nothings


Republicans campaigned for the midterms promising to fight crime, inflation, the recession, open borders, and high gas prices. For all that, they won the House with an itty bitty tiny minuscule majority. Naturally, with a tiny majority, the GOP is on notice and needs to be productive at governing and producing significant legislation in order to retain power and perhaps even grow its majority in two years. To pass anything significant, they’ll need to compromise with Democrats. They’re not going to do that.

The Republicans are going to spend the next two years on partisan bullshit. They’re going to make a lot of noise over nothing. They’re going to repeat what they did with Benghazi. What did they do there? They conducted multiple investigations which were effective politically but that’s it. They didn’t prove any crimes or negligence…but they hurt Hillary Clinton.

Back in 2015 just as the race for the presidency was beginning, Kevin McCarthy told Sean Hannity, “Everybody thought Hillary Clinton was unbeatable, right? But we put together a Benghazi special committee, a select committee. What are her numbers today? Her numbers are dropping. Why? Because she’s untrustable. But no one would have known any of that had happened, had we not fought.”

The GOP had the majority in the House then and McCarthy was the second goon in command. He openly admitted the entire reason for the Benghazi investigation was to hurt Hillary Clinton. That’s it. They didn’t produce any results and the GOP was lousy at legislating, but boy, could they investigate the shit out of nothing. That investigation cost you $7 million. Thanks, fiscal conservatives.

Also, remember McCarthy is the same goon who cries that the select committee investigating the insurrection is partisan and political.

Now, they’re going to investigate Hunter Biden. They’ve been barking nonstop over the past two years about Hunter Biden’s laptop without producing anything significant. Again, what’s on Hunter’s laptop? They couldn’t tell you. And in two more years, after they’ve spent millions investigating Hunter, they still won’t be able to tell you. That’s my prediction and I feel pretty confident about it.

And if Republicans actually cared about corruption, they’d investigate Trump making money from foreign governments while he was in office. They’d investigate why Saudi Arabia gave Jared $2 billion after he left the White House. Instead, they’re going to investigate the Justice Department for investigating actual crimes Donald Trump committed. Which crimes? Take your pick. There are several.

They’re going to make a lot of noise about the military withdrawal from Afghanistan while ignoring it was an agreement Trump negotiated with the Taliban. In two years, we’ll be right where we are today.

It’ll be the same way with Dr. Fauci, Merrick Garland, the border, and whatever other bullshit they can come up with. Republican success with these investigations won’t be any change in policies, legislation, impeachments, or even by providing Americans with answers. Success for them will be if they can convince Americans that Joe Biden is bad, even if they can’t tell you why. They did it with Hillary. Why is Hillary bad? We don’t know but we got decades of Republicans telling us she is so it must be true, right?

For the next two years, Republicans will be giving us nothing but gaslighting. They have the majority which gives them the power to set the agenda and issue subpoenas, which might be awkward after spending the past two years telling the public to ignore congressional subpoenas.

I hope America pays attention. Inflation, high gas prices, crime, the recession, the borders? Republicans don’t solve legitimate problems. Remember this in two years. In two years, tell me what the GOP House majority accomplished. I can jump ahead and tell you now.

Nothing.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Discount Thoughts and Prayers


What can I say after another mass shooting? What can I say after a second mass shooting in the span of a week? What can I say that I haven’t already said?

Since I put about seven hours into this cartoon on a holiday, I’m gonna let you spend time finding all the goodies in it by sparing you a blog.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Hunter 2024


Donald Trump and his ilk believe he can’t be investigated, indicted, or prosecuted if he’s a candidate for the presidency. If this is true, then expect every lawbreaker under investigation in the future to declare he or she is a presidential candidate. And, they won’t even have to wait until it’s campaign season. Donald Trump didn’t and announced his candidacy the week after the midterms. Now, Donald Trump will be officially running for president for two straight years…unless he’s in prison. But even then, he might continue as a candidate.

Now, Donald Trump will claim any investigation of him is political because he’s a presidential candidate, and President Joe Biden is sicking the government on him because it’s the only way to stop him. Except, he was under investigation before he announced his candidacy. Joe Biden can stop him without sicking the government on him because he did it before and beat him legitimately in the 2020 election. Trump was the only one who tried to use the power of the presidency to go after his opponents, such as extorting Ukraine for dirt on the Bidens and having his Attorney General Bill Barr appoint Special Counsel John Durham to investigate Hillary Clinton’s campaign, which is still going after two years despite not proving anything. And there’s the uncomfortable factoid for MAGAts that Donald Trump is an actual criminal.

Speaking of politically-motivated investigations brings us to Hunter Biden’s laptop which was first reported on in 2020 by The New York Post, though it wasn’t given much attention at the time because it was reported by The New York Post and they didn’t have much to go on. Even the reporters who wrote the story refused to put their names on it because journalistically speaking, there was nothing there.

Most stories on the laptop that were initially repeated only said there was a laptop that once belonged to Hunter Biden. That alone made people start screaming. Donald Trump even tried to bring it up during a debate with Joe Biden. “Well, your son owned a laptop.”

Over the past two years, legitimate media outlets have acknowledged that there is indeed a laptop and The Washington Post even hired experts to go over a copy of the hard drive who authenticated parts of it. This week, CBS News did the same thing.

What they have found is that much of the information on the hard drive is authentic and did come from Hunter Biden.

So now, Republicans who will have a slim majority in the House in January are promising investigations into Hunter Biden and they’re going to use this laptop as part of it. They get to point out that it actually once belonged to Hunter and lots of stuff on it is authentic. But, what’s on it? What has been authenticated?

The laptop came into GOP possession through a MAGAt who owns a computer repair shop in Delaware. He claims Hunter dropped it off for repairs and never paid for the repairs and abandoned the laptop. So the repair shop goon did what any concerned individual would do who’d want a legitimate and credible investigation into something, and gave it to… wait for it… Rudy Giuliani.

But before Rudy could get his hands on it, the FBI picked it up because they were investigating Hunter for lobbying for a foreign government without registering as a foreign lobbyist and for possible tax evasion. In fact, they’re still investigating him. So, what Rudy got was a copy from which he sent further copies covered in farts and hair dye to the goon universe. If this laptop is ever produced as evidence in a court trial, it will be dismissed pretty quickly.

So even if everything on the laptop is legitimate, what’s on it that implicates President Biden in a crime? Well, nothing. I mean, Republicans have yet to produce anything that shows a crime being committed by anyone, even Hunter. They haven’t even found downloaded Nickelback songs on the laptop. Even the bad stuff they claim, like photos of Hunter with underage girls, has turned out to be a lie. There are also rumors that there’s a pic of Hunter in the nude, but hell, even Reagan’s daughter posed for Playboy, so no crime there unless he was naked in a Starbucks.

This just in! Hunter’s laptop has a picture of Hunter naked in a Starbucks! Impeach his dad now! I can assure you from personal experience that Starbucks will make you put on pants while in their stores.

What is proven on the laptop is that Hunter was working on a business deal in China AFTER his father was vice president. There’s an email about bringing a “big guy” in on the deal, which everyone assumes is Joe Biden. And there’s a reply to that from Hunter saying the “big guy” doesn’t want any part of the deal. Then, there’s a voicemail saved to the hard drive from Joe Biden himself. Yeah, now we’re getting somewhere? What does that message say? Was it Joe Biden providing bank account numbers where to deposit bribes from foreign governments, or laying out plants to go pantless in Starbucks? No, it was Joe Biden telling his son to seek help for his drug addiction because he loves him very much. So…Aha! Joe Biden is a man who cares about his son and wants him to get help for his drug addiction. Can we impeach him for that? You never heard a voicemail from Donald Trump telling Jr. to seek help for his cocaine addiction. I’m not saying Donald Trump Jr has a coke addiction, I’m just saying we never heard that voicemail from his father.

But, even if the laptop proves Hunter is a criminal, he’s not Joe Biden. He’s not in a government office. He’s not the president. He doesn’t even work in the White House.

Surely Hunter did profit from being his father’s son when he got a job for Burisma, a Ukraine energy company, but that’s not illegal. If it was illegal to make money from your father’s name while he’s in office, then JaVanka would be answering a lot of serious questions regarding how they made $640 million while Trump was president (sic) and while they worked in his administration.

There are questions about Hunter trying to make a business deal in China, which he failed at, but also isn’t illegal. Did you know that Donald Trump owns businesses in foreign countries? Did you know that Donald Trump continued to make money off foreign governments while he was president (sic)? Did you know that it’s legal to own a laptop?

So, I’m going to tell you what I’ve told you in previous blogs. Anytime you hear someone talking about Hunter Biden’s laptop, ask them, “What’s on it?”. If they tell you, then they’re lying (like Ted Rall when he said the laptop incriminates Joe Biden without telling us how). It doesn’t matter if it’s a real laptop that really belonged to the president’s son once upon a time, you need something incriminating on it to go after someone.

And despite there not being a damn thing on it that even suggest illegalities, Republicans are about to start spending millions of your money investigating Hunter and Joe based on this insignificant laptop. They can’t even tell you what crimes they’re investigating. They’re going to Benghazi the fuck out of this laptop.

If Republicans really cared about the rule of law, then they’d investigate the guy who attempted to extort a foreign president for dirt on his political opponent, or an attempt to steal an election, or an insurrection, or stolen classified government documents, or sexually assaulting women, or Jared for receiving $2 billion from Saudi Arabia immediately upon his resignation from his White House job where he worked on government deals with Saudi Arabia.

What we’re going to get from a Republican House majority are investigations by the goons who engage in coverups.

I think Hunter should declare his candidacy for president just to fuck with them.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Grumpy Old Men


Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Clubbing With Boebert


A gunman entered a Colorado Springs LGBTQ+ nightclub during a midnight drag show Saturday and murdered five people and injured over a dozen others. The suspect was arrested on suspicion of five counts of first-degree murder and five counts of bias-motivated or hate crimes. He was injured when police made the arrest because he was taken down by a retired Army Major and Bronze Star recipient and a drag performer, and they beat his ass with his own gun, an AR-15-type assault rifle. This makes drag queens better at stopping mass shootings than Uvalde and Texas police.

Colorado representative Lauren Boebert tweeted, “The news out of Colorado Springs is absolutely awful. This morning the victims & their families are in my prayers. This lawless violence needs to end and end quickly.” She didn’t mention it happened at an LGBTQ+ club or during a drag show. Why is that? Because over the past several years, Boebert has been sharing her homophobia with the public and attacking LGBTQ+ people.

She has been criticized by watchdog groups for perpetuating false narratives about LGBTQ people and spreading inflammatory rhetoric online to her millions of followers.
She’s sponsored anti-LGBTQ+ legislation.
She’s claimed trans people don’t exist.
She’s accused drag queens of being groomers.
When an anti-hate group ranked her Twitter account third in spreading lies about LGBTQ+ people being groomers, she vowed to step up her hate tweets to get a number-one ranking.
She’s tweeted that children should be taken to “church, not drag shows.”
She believes there should be a law making it illegal to decide your sexual preference before you’re 21, which means she’s a hypocrite or didn’t realize she was straight until she was 21.

If we ever do end this violence, as she demanded, it won’t end because of any help from her. She’s also a gun nut, consistently voting against measures to limit gun violence and mass shootings. One of her campaign commercials featured her smugly walking around the Capitol with a gun strapped to her hip. Until their landlord refused to renew their lease, Boebert and her husband, who likes to expose himself to teenage girls in bowling alleys, operated a gun-themed restaurant named Shooter’s Grill.

Boebert is a vile human being and one of the most disgusting in Congress with the likes of Matt Gaetz, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Louie Gohmert, Jim Jordan, and until he was defeated in a primary, Madison Cawthorn (who likes to dress in drag). She barely won reelection this month which is a damn shame.

Lauren Boebert is a stupid hateful homophobic Islamophobic racist so when she pretends to be sad over a shooting that targeted the same people she targets with hate tweets, she needs to be held accountable. Some people are calling her out and won’t let her get away with it.

Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez tweeted at her, “You have played a major role in elevating anti-LGBT+ hate rhetoric and anti-trans lies while spending your time in Congress blocking even the most common sense gun safety laws.” AOC told her, “You don’t get to ‘thoughts and prayers’ your way out of this. Look inward and change.”

Boebert will not change. She’s a rancid human being appealing to a rancid base of MAGAts. Hate, intolerance, and stupidity are her bread and butter.

AOC isn’t alone in calling Boebert out. Mondaire Jones, one of the few openly gay members of Congress, tweeted at Boebert, saying, “Your record is absolutely awful. You use hateful rhetoric towards the LGBTQ+ community and helped block even modest efforts to end gun violence.”

Representative Jamal Bowman tweeted, “Your rhetoric and lack of legislative courage and humanity radicalized people to do the evil and unthinkable.” Truly. You don’t see gay people attacking square dances and Cracker Barrels with AR-15s and hammers.

Colorado state Rep. Brianna Titone, the first transgender person elected to the state legislature, replied to Boebert Sunday morning, writing, “There’s blood on your hands. Thanks for the ‘thoughts and prayers’ but that does nothing to offset the damage that you directly did to incite these kinds of attacks on the LGBTQ+ community. You spreading tropes and insults contributed to the hatred for us. Just resign.”

I second that. Just resign, Boebert. It’s not like you have ever sponsored a bill that got through a single committee, less enough, passed into law. Taxpayers are paying you a six-figure salary for literally nothing unless you count hate and support of insurrections something.

I wanted to see how a few other goons were reacting to the shooting, so I checked in on my favorite MAGAt cartoonist who I use as a barometer for the current hateful snowflakey white victimization talking point (read the comments). And he does have some outrage that has to do with the LGBTQ+ community. No, he’s not upset over the shooting at a drag show. He’s upset that the U.S. soccer team has incorporated the rainbow flag as part of its crest on their uniforms during the World Cup tournament (and claiming the logo has replaced the U.S. flag, which it hasn’t). But the drag show, he hasn’t mentioned that.

Correction: I originally wrote that Richard Fierro was a retired Marine, but he was actually a major in the Army. Oops. Thanks for sending the correction, Bob. The person who helped the Army vet take down the shooter was not a drag performer but a trans woman (as I was just told by an editor of one of my client newspapers. He also informed me vet beat the shooter with his own pistol, not his rifle. The original details I wrote were what I got this morning. Sorry.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Bonesaw Dreams


Mohammed bin Salman, the Crown Prince and now Prime Minister of Saudi Arabia may receive legal immunity from a lawsuit over the murder of Saudi dissident and Washington Post journalist Jamal Khashoggi. As a candidate, Joe Biden promised to isolate MBS and turn the man into an international pariah over his role in the murder of Khashoggi, which our national intelligence believes he ordered. As president, Biden has visited MBS in Saudi Arabia and gave the guy a fist bump. Now, instead of making the murderer a pariah, he’s legitimized him… and he still hasn’t helped us out with rising gas prices.

Donald Trump, who made excuses for MBS’s murder and has hosted his golf tournaments while his son-in-law, Jared, has been gifted $2 billion from the Crown Prince, is more likely to see the inside of an American prison before the Saudi ever will. Perhaps Trump is sympathetic toward MBS because he can relate to killing people. Because of Trump’s ineptitude, mismanagement, lies, downplaying, and politicizing of the coronavirus pandemic, tens of thousands of Americans died who shouldn’t have. There is blood on both of these men’s hands.

And while MBS is being shielded from an American lawsuit over the murder of Khashoggi, Trump will now be investigated by a Special Counsel appointed by Attorney General Merrick Garland.

I thought the appointment of a Special Counsel was a bad move until I saw Trump and Republicans’ reaction to it. Trump has called it “unfair” and says he won’t “partake” in it, at least not in the way he partakes with a KFC bucket.

Trump said, “For six years I have been going through this, and I am not going to go through it anymore.” The reason Trump has been “going through this” for six years is that he’s been a criminal for over six years. And guess what. He will be going through it again. And not “partake?” He barely partaked (partooked?) with the Mueller investigation and refused to sit down for an interview. I hope this Special Counsel doesn’t eat that bullshit and is tougher than Robert Mueller.

After “going through this” and being optimistic about the Mueller investigation, I’m going to withhold my enthusiasm for this one until I see something to be hopeful about.

Trump and his goons have been claiming all these investigations are political anyway, so I’d ignore all the noise they’re making now. Like MBS, Donald Trump is a criminal. Let’s at least make one of these bad guys receive justice.

Creative note: I’m leaving town tomorrow so I planned out my next three cartoons… and then Merrick Garland had to fuck all that up yesterday.

Music note: I listened to Zebra’s first album.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Extremists in the House


America returned control of the House of Representatives to Republicans in the midterm elections, despite the fact they’re Republicans. What I mean by that is, Republicans oppose everything the majority of voters in this nation are in favor of.

Most Americans favor democracy and mail-in voting. Most Americans favor ballot drop boxes. Most Americans choose the United States over Russia. Most Americans are in favor of a woman’s right to choose and believe abortion should remain legal in every state. Most Americans support Medicare and Social Security. Most Americans support Obamacare. Most Americans support student debt relief. Most Americans oppose coups and insurrections. Most Americans believe Joe Biden won because most Americans voted for him.

Republicans are also the party of racists, liars, and lunatics. Who do you think the Proud Boys vote for? Who do you think Klansmen and Nazis vote for?

But Republicans ran on a message of fighting crime, reducing inflation, lowering gas prices, and closing our “open” borders (bullshit). This is what a lot of Americans voted for when they voted for a Republican. So what will Republicans do now that they have the power to set the agenda? They’re going to impeach Hunter Biden.

In case you weren’t paying attention during the campaigns for the midterms, and if you voted for a Republican you weren’t, none of the Republicans offered solutions to inflation, high gas prices, crime, or to border issues. Not a single one of them proposed any ideas. They just made a lot of noise about it. What are we going to do about the open border? We’re going to close it. How? By closing it!

And in case you weren’t paying attention to the last time Republicans controlled the House, you’ll remember they don’t know how to govern. I guess you forgot that. What was John Boehner’s greatest legislative accomplishment as Speaker? What was Paul Ryan’s? The biggest legislative achievement in the Trump era when the GOP controlled the House and Senate was to give Trump and other billionaires tax cuts. That was it. They didn’t even fund his wall that Mexico was supposed to pay for.

Now, Republicans have a slim majority which is a huge problem for them. There’s a difference between Democrats having a slim majority and Republicans having one. The Democrats had Nancy Pelosi, who just announced she won’t seek the leadership position in January. But as Speaker, Pelosi is the G.O.A.T. She can count votes and herd cats. Even with disagreements and small revolts from the likes of the Squad, Pelosi still got things done. She out-negotiated Donald Trump and kicked his ass repeatedly. Remember when the House voted for Trump’s first impeachment and applause broke out by Democrats until Nancy gave that look? When she gave the mother’s look, the House fell silent. Nancy was the BOSS.

Republicans on the other hand are held hostage to their extremists. Kevin McCarthy has already bent over for the Dum-Dum Caucus, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, and before he was defeated in a primary, Madison Cawthorn.

Despite the slim majority, Republicans can set the agenda and they have subpoena power. So expect subpoenas to be sent out by the very same people who refused to cooperate with an investigation into an insurrection that tried to overturn our government.

Republicans plan to investigate Hunter Biden despite the fact there is already an investigation into him by the Department of Justice and that Hunter has never held a government position. There will NOT be an investigation into Jared receiving $2 billion from the Saudis right after he left his post of making government deals with the Saudis.

The Republicans’ plan to investigate Hunter is strange also because there’s been nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing, and nothing at all that implies or suggests President Biden did anything illegal, unethical, or inappropriate when it came to his son’s business dealings. And despite having the laptop in their hands for two years, it hasn’t even given Republicans any evidence that Hunter did anything illegal. But expect them to spend millions of dollars on a two-year investigation that produces nothing. I expect Jim Jordan to chair this one.

I’ve said this before and I’m gonna say it again. Ask any Republican, or Ted “Sputnik boy” Rall, what’s on the laptop.

Instead of investigating Donald Trump’s crime of stealing classified government documents, they are going to investigate the investigators. They did this right after Trump assumed the presidency. Instead of investigating Russian spies and Russian collusion in the Trump Campaign, they investigated the people who investigated Russian spies and Russian collusion in the Trump Campaign. How will the House do this without Devin Nunes, who is now overseeing Truth Social or some shit like that?

They’re going to spend millions investigating the military withdrawal from Afghanistan but ignore that it was negotiated by Donald Trump and the Taliban. This one should be fun and it might be short because there will be Democrats on the committee and one of them might bring up the Trump/Taliban factor.

They’re going to investigate border policies and attempt to impeach Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas.

They’re going to investigate the origins of Covid-19 and I really really really really hope they put Marjorie Taylor Greene on this committee. Since this is starting out with nothing but conspiracy theories, I believe Republicans are dumb enough to give her a seat on the committee. Before she was removed from her committee assignments for endorsing death threats against Speaker Pelosi, MTG, Ms. Jewish Space Lasers, sat on the Education Committee…seriously.

But mostly, when it comes to significant legislation, there will be two years of nothing. Remember that M. Night Shyamalan film “The Happening” where nothing happened? I still wonder how I sat through two hours of a plot about grass ordering humans to kill themselves, but then I remember some fuckers have sat through entire Trump speeches (but in my defense, the grass wasn’t bigoted and ordering only Jews to jump off buildings). But yeah, it’s going to be like that not-happening movie…but for two years. And in 2024, we can point out that the GOP did nothing for two years…except shut down the government which I’m sure they’ll do at least once over some insignificant bullshit (remember when Donald Trump only got a little bit of money for his racist border wall, so he shut down the government, and Pelosi negotiated him into not getting any money for his racist border wall? Ah, good times).

So, expect two years of nothingness except for Republicans shooting themselves in their collective foot….like all the other times voters gave them control of the House since 1994.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Four More Coups


Welcome to the first day of the 2024 campaign season.

If Donald Trump really believes the last election was stolen and the election didn’t work, then why is he going through the trouble of going through another election? If I take my car through a carwash and it comes out with pigeon crap all over it, I’m not gonna go through that carwash again. The only reason for Trump to run for president again when he believes, as he stated last night, that our democracy is a “rigged and corrupt system,” is to use the 2024 election as a vehicle for another coup attempt.

Seizing power isn’t just one of the several reasons Trump announced his candidacy for the 2024 election last night. One of my readers on GoComics titled the Trump comeback attempt “Loserpalooza Grifting Tour 2024.” Trump has a history of grifting his supporters. To raise money from his gullible goons over the past two years, he’s used fighting to be reinstated (he was not reinstated), to fund campaigns for other Republicans (which he did very little of), and to fight the political attacks against him by the FBI and DOJ (they’re not political). Now, he gets to raise money as a political candidate, but let’s use last night as an example of how that works into another grift.

Trump made his announcement at Mar-a-Lago. This was a campaign event. I’m sure Mar-a-Lago charged the Trump campaign to host this event. For the slow kids, the money you gave Trump for his campaign or Super PAC went to the venue owned by Trump and then went into Trump’s pocket. This is what we refer to as a grift.

Records from Trump’s former accounting firm, Mazars USA, were released two days ago by the House Committee on Oversight and Reform. The disclosure shows that six nations spent over $750,000 at Trump’s Washington hotel during his presidency (sic). China, Malaysia, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, and the United Arab Emirates would spend $10,000 a night in order to influence the Trump White House (sic). Qatar spent more than $300,000 over three months ahead of a meeting between Trump and the country’s emir. So when Trump sat down to talk to that guy, he was probably aware that he had just given him over $300,000. These are just six of the nations that patronized a Trump property while he was in office. The Washington Post estimates that his trips to Mar-a-Lago alone cost taxpayers over $64 million.

At $64 million, that’s one dollar for every bedbug found at Trump Doral. Or at $130,000 to silence porn stars he raw dogged in Vegas hotel rooms, $64 million would pay off 493 Stormy Daniels. And MAGAt goons want an accounting of every dollar we spent on Ukraine, please.

Another reason Trump’s announcing this early is that he believes he can’t be indicted by the Department of Justice for the coup attempt, or the stealing of classified information, or by Georgia for election fraud, and for everything else he’s being investigated for. Since Donald Trump’s white nationalist terrorists defecated in the halls of Congress, I believe any sentence Trump receives should include picking up dog poop in Washington D.C.’s public parks. Hey, who’s that fat orange guy bagging dog doo-doo in Farragut Square?

And another reason he’s announcing this early is to scare off other potential Republican candidates, like Ron DeSantis. But if anything, Trump has potentially created an exciting moment for when DeSantis does announce, because it’ll be new and fresh after Trump has spent months being the only candidate barking out the same boring lies. Ooh, when he does announce, I hope DeSantis wears the white boots.

Boring? Did I mention boring? It couldn’t have been boring because last night, I turned on Fox News for a few minutes and saw Mike Huckabee and Jim Jordan telling Sean Hannity that it would be impossible to beat Trump because he was on a huge roll of dynamic energy or some shit like that. Sean, Huckabee, Jordan, and a few other goons were going on and on about how incredible Trump’s speech was that they weren’t actually paying any attention to. What?

Yeah, Fox News cut away from Trump’s speech to talk about his speech. The fear for Fox News was that their viewers might actually hear it…or fall asleep while hearing it. This is like me making a giant bowl of pasta with my amazing sauce, putting it across the room where you can see it, but not letting you have any of it. Instead, I’ll just describe it and tell you how amazing it is. Just take my word for it. The meatballs are amaze-balls. Mmm, mmm, mmm.

Last night, all the pundits were pointing out that Trump was attempting to duplicate what Grover Cleveland accomplished and be just the second former president to win the presidency. Grover Cleveland was elected to the presidency in 1885 and he lost his reelection attempt in 1889. Four years later, in 1892, he came back and won the presidency again. Not only did he win the presidency, but he beat William McKinley, the man who defeated him in 1889. Trump isn’t just trying to do what Cleveland did by winning back the presidency, but also by defeating the man who defeated him, President Joe Biden.

But after listening to his speech last night, or at least the parts I didn’t fall asleep to, Trump is more likely to duplicate the history of the five other former presidents who attempted to retake the White House than he is to duplicate Cleveland’s feat.

Trump’s speech was boring. Sure, he was reading off a teleprompter but it was like the guy couldn’t see the periods. It was one long run-on sentence of lies.

It wasn’t shocking that MSNBC didn’t air any of his speech live, but it was a little of a surprise that CNN gave up and went to analysts during his speech. But it was an even bigger surprise that Fox News stopped airing it live and instead, brought us the fawning analysis of Mike Huckabee. Fox News wanted their readers to trust that it was an exciting speech instead of viewing it and seeing it as the snore-fest it actually was. Jeb Bush tweeted that it was “low energy” and hashtagged #SleepyDonnie.

It was an extremely long speech. In fact, he might still be delivering it.

You might be thinking it only seemed boring on TV and to truly appreciate the dynamic energy and enthusiasm, one would have had to be there. We could always ask the people who were there if only the Trump Campaign would unlock the doors and let them out. That’s right. Several people tried to flee before they yawned themselves to death but were foiled in their escape attempts by locked doors. That was probably a violation of a lot of fire codes and definitely the stuff of my nightmares.

I was in a room during a Trump speech once and fortunately, the doors were not locked and my companion and I were able to flee the scene during all the seig heils when nobody would notice. But even if they had locked the doors, no Trump Campaign workers would have been able to prevent me from leaving.

It’s the lack of energy and enthusiasm coming from Trump that makes me believe he’s not going to duplicate Grover Cleveland, and instead follow the paths of Martin Van Buren, Millard Filmore, Ulysses S. Grant, Theodore Roosevelt, and Herbert Hoover (Yes, I have ninja research skills, y’all). Each of these five former presidents attempted a comeback to retake the White House after leaving it. What all five failed to do wasn’t just win back the White House, but win their parties’ nominations. Each of their parties said, “Nah, uh-uh, we’re good, thanks but no thanks,” and “seriously, Fillmore? What the fuck?”

Maybe instead of trying to be like Grover Cleveland, other than being tied with him for second-fattest president (Cleveland didn’t have a Dr. Ronnie Jackson to lie about his weight but he did have a doctor who’d give him secret jaw surgery on a yacht off the coast of Long Island), Trump should try to do what president John Tyler did.

John Tyler also lost the presidency after one term, took 16 years off, then attempted a political comeback by running for a seat in Congress…the Confederate Congress.

Sure, John Tyler was a traitor, a former U.S. president joining the enemy, but Trump’s a traitor too. Donald Trump is beholden to Russia and tried to overthrow our government. And we all know how much Trump loves Confederate statues and defends Nazis and people in white hoods, but the Confederacy isn’t around anymore. Maybe Trump can run for office in the government of one of our enemies that still exist, like Russia or North Korea. Tyler won a seat in the Confederacy and maybe Trump can sit in the Duma, the Russian Congress. They can call him the Duma Dumbass. It’s catchy.

Just be careful, Sleepy Donnie. Tyler won the election in his political comeback but died before he could assume his treasonous office. Don’t worry, Donald. I’ll let everyone know you’re not dead…and that you’re just giving another speech.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: