How’s It Hanging?


cjones04142020

If your erection for Donald Trump has lasted over four years, seek medical help.

If you follow everything Donald Trump says to the point that you will follow his medical advice, go talk to a real doctor before it’s too late.

If you’re still downplaying the coronavirus and believe it’s a Democratic hoax created to hurt Donald Trump, go find a crowd to mingle in. I hear the beaches in Georgia are open.

If you’re fine with Donald Trump ignoring an incoming pandemic after repeated warnings and are now making excuses defending him, talk to an analyst.

If you call the press “fake news” and the “enemy of the American people,” believe that facts are things designed to hurt Donald Trump, that he has never told a lie, or base your opinions on conspiracy theories, seek professional help.

If you’re fine with a president basing how much medical aid a state receives on how much the governor has flattered him, you suck.

If you’re cool that the president focuses less on a response to a pandemic and more on TV ratings and if he’s “number one on Facebook,” go watch an Andrew Cuomo press conference to see how a real leader behaves in a crisis.

If after four years, you’re still fine with nepotism, grifting from the Oval Office, not seeing tax returns, violating emoluments, stealing from charities, praising Putin and Nazis, attacking women, racism, being in love with North Korean dictators, declaring Canadian cheese a national security threat, feuding with NATO, not understanding the nuclear triad or how tariffs work, lying about a wall, stealing money for the wall, losing negotiations to Pelosi, narcissism, throwing babies in jail, or cult worship in the White House where every sentence has to begin with “Thank you Mr. President, for your leadership,” then you need a personality transplant because you’re an asshole.

If you’re still citing, “If you like your doctor, you can keep your doctor,” but ignoring, “Everyone who needs a test gets a test,” go fuck yourself.

The thing is, you should have given up on Donald Trump a long time ago. If your erection lasted after “largest crowd sizes,” your condition may be terminal.

Tip Jar:

This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

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