Schlonged


cjones12232015

Donald Trump, the Oompa Loompa currently leading the Republican pack for their presidential nomination isn’t very sophisticated.

During the Democrats debate last weekend Hillary returned to her podium late after one commercial break. Trump announced that he knows where she was and what she was doing. Trump is so much more perceptive than the rest of to realize that someone was taking a bathroom break. It seems that women using the restroom is news to Trump which is really weird since he’s been married three times. He also talked about how her going to the restroom is disgusting and he didn’t wanna talk about it, after bringing it up. If he wins the nomination will he wear gloves debating Hillary in order to avoid catching the dreaded Cooties?

I don’t really wanna talk about it either as I don’t share Trump’s fascination with people’s bathroom habits.

The potty issue wasn’t the most bizarre Trumpism The Donald brought up Tuesday. He attacked Hillary for being a liar for saying Trump’s statements helps ISIS recruit. He demanded an apology. Then it got weird.

Trump talked about Hillary losing to Obama in 2008 and said she got “schlonged.” For those who are ignorant, or even playing dumb like The Donald, “schlong” is a Yiddish word for penis. And yes, he made a verb out of it. How one is not familiar with Yiddish slang growing up and living their entire life in New York City is really beyond me. Maybe he never leaves the penthouse.

He later defended himself, on Twitter of course, selling that the word is not vulgar and means taking a beating. Odd how Trump is always misunderstood for saying something sexist. When he said Megyn Kelly had “blood coming out of her whatever” he tried to pass it off as a common expression with nothing to do with menstruation. When he made a comment about Carly Fiorina’s face he said he was just saying she wasn’t qualified to be president, not that he was calling her ugly.

Other than my former editor, the one group you’ll have a hard time convincing a dirty word isn’t dirty are journalists. If you’ve ever been in a newsroom then you know what I’m talking about.

Trump says he’s not politically correct, and that’s what people love about him. In that case I’ll stop being politically correct and say anyone voting for Trump is a sexist, misogynist, racist, Islamophobic, xenophobic, bigot, and a bully. And they’re kinda stupid.

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3 comments

  1. Hahahaha!!! Well, Clay, I have to say, you have something in common with The Donald that I never realized until you pointed it out yourself. Your ratings improve when you’re not politically correct, or at least yours do when I’m voting! His, not so much, but his minions take care of that.
    [a few typos in this one, so let me know if you want ’em]

    Like

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