MAGA Hangry

Shortly after the Trump insurrection attempt in which he sent white nationalist terrorists to attack the Capitol on January 6 to stop the certification of the 2020 election he had just lost, Kevin McCarthy blamed Trump.

McCarthy played tough guy and told some gathered Republican colleagues the story of how he told Trump over the phone that it was all his fault and shame on him. Kevin thought he was ahead of the polls and the Republican Party was going to denounce Trump and move on to more traditional type Republicans. But Kevin underestimated and when he saw Republican voters were still standing by Trump and putting the cult over the nation, Kevin stopped playing tough game.

As we saw during the 15 votes for him to become Speaker of the House, Kevin has no integrity. It wasn’t important to him how he became Speaker or what power he truly yielded, as long as he became Speaker. He had a huge shit-eating grin on his face after the 15th vote, not caring that he had made too many deals to be a Speaker with any integrity. He didn’t care that there wasn’t enough genuine support for him to be Speaker. He didn’t care that the check for his Speakership would arrive in less than a year.

And he displayed that he’s a sniveling coward without integrity back in 2020 when he saw the GOP was still a cult and knowing he’d never be Speaker without Trump’s support, he promptly ran down to Mar-a-Lago to kiss Trump’s ass.

According to her new book, Oath and Honor, Liz Cheney asked Kevin shortly after his return, “Mar-a-Lago? What the hell, Kevin?”

Kevin replied, “They’re really worried. Trump’s not eating, so they asked me to come see him.”

“What? You went to Mar-a-Lago because Trump’s not eating?” Cheney responded.

“Yeah, he’s really depressed,” said Kevin.

At the time, McCarthy claimed he went to Mar-a-Lago to unite the party. But was it because Trump was really depressed or was it just an excuse to get Liz off his back?

But it does make sense because any time I feel depressed, the only thing that can cheer me up is a pep talk from Kevin McCarthy. I can only imagine how many people he’s talked off ledges and after Joe Biden won the election, it must have been thousands.

But I’m wondering why Trump was depressed? Was it because he lost the election, lost the attempt to steal it, or the insurrection didn’t work?

Maybe he was depressed because the McRib hadn’t returned yet. Maybe he was depressed because Stormy wouldn’t return his calls. Maybe he’s depressed because Putin won’t return his calls. Maybe he was depressed because Donald Trump Jr does return his calls. Maybe he’s depressed because there will be no more love letters from Kim Jong Un. Maybe he was depressed because he wouldn’t be able to grift taxpayers as much as could while president (sic). Maybe he was depressed because the Saudis gave Jared $2 billion and not to him. Maybe he’s depressed Ivanka is his daughter and society would frown on them dating. Maybe he was depressed because none of the classified documents he stole revealed if Oompa-Loompas were real or not. Maybe he was depressed because he has a Trump penis. Maybe he’s depressed because he knew even back then that he was probably going to prison.

I’m not that worried about Trump’s depression because judging from his mug shot, it doesn’t look like he’s starving.

According to Cheney’s book, Republicans mocked McCarthy for sucking up to Trump, using the “you complete me” line from Jerry Maguire.” Cheney wrote that Republican Mark Green said “sheepishly to no one in particular, ‘The things we do for the Orange Jesus.’” And while they may have mocked McCarthy for his lack of a backbone, none of them did it publicly.

What will really depress me is if somehow Donald Trump retakes the White House. I need a sandwich.

Music note: I’m still listening to the Stones.

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