Mouse Poker

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is making his fight against Disney personal. It has less to do with what’s best for the people in the state of Florida and more to do with Boots DeSantis’ fragile ego. In fact, the entire squabble started over his ego.

When the “Don’t Say Gay” law was first proposed, Disney came out against it. The smartest thing DeSantis and Republicans could have done with that was to ignore it. Nothing would have changed from it. The homophobic bill would have still become law, Florida bigots would all high-five each other, and Disney would continue going about business as usual and bringing in money to the state as it’s been doing for the past 56 years. After all, Disney is the largest employer in Florida. It would take a real dumbass to fuck with that.

So Governor Dumbass fucked with that. Making it personal, he and his Republican goons sought to punish Disney and did so by revoking the status of their special governing district. Florida is full of these special districts. They allow a company to self-govern an area, like with sewer and road maintenance thus reducing the tax obligations of citizens in those districts. It’s more complicated than how I explained it, but that’s the gist. Disney maintained its own local government, police department, and fire department for 56 years.

By taking away the special status, Republicans put the tax burden on citizens in the district. It took them a year to pass a new bill to put all the financial obligations back onto Disney while still not allowing them to self-govern. And, a new board was created to oversee the district. Naturally, the board is full of religious fundamental homophobic goons DeSantis appointed. DeSantis stated that he expects the board to go beyond making decisions on matters like water, roads, and sewage, and work to influence the content Disney puts out. But right before DeSantis’ new board of religious zealots, sycophants, and fucknuts could take control, the Mouse pulled a fast one. And it did it in broad daylight.

At the 11th hour, the outgoing board approved a change that allows Disney to retain control over the land within the outer limits of Orange and Osceola counties “21 years after the death of the last survivor of the descendants of King Charles III, king of England.” That fucks things up for DeSantis and basically makes the new board powerless. The new rule states, “Any changes will be “subject to Disney’s prior review and comment” to “ensure consistency with the overall design and theming” of the company’s park.” The good news for DeSantis and Republicans is that they’ll have full power to put Disney in its place 21 years after the last member of England’s royal family dies.

With this new ruling, Disney no longer needs board approval to build high-density projects or buildings of any height and can sell or assign development rights. It also bans the board from using Disney’s name or any of its characters.

One of DeSantis’ board members, Ron Peri, a right-wing homophobic Christian pastor said, “This board loses, for practical purposes, the majority of its ability to do anything beyond maintain the roads and maintain basic infrastructure.” You know this board full of homophobic religious fundamentalists didn’t join the board because they care about water and sewage. You know these goons joined up to prevent Disney from making future movies where Disney princesses marry Disney princesses. I’d watch that.

Disney issued a statement saying, “All agreements signed between Disney and the District were appropriate, and were discussed and approved in open, noticed public forums in compliance with Florida’s ‘Government in the Sunshine’ law.” Disney made the entire process public with notices knowing that Republicans were too busy high-fiving each other to notice.

Florida Republican lawmakers are once again talking about changing laws to invalidate the new rules. DeSantis himself is promising to punish the corporation further by piling on new taxes and toll roads to Disney, which is a weird position to take if you want to be the Republican nominee for president. How do you tell Republicans to vote for the guy who just raised taxes on a corporation? How do you tell Republicans to vote for the guy that just added higher fees to families visiting Disney World in Orlando? Disney isn’t going to pay those tolls, tourists are.

And, if DeSantis is hoping toll roads will discourage people from visiting and spending their money at Disney World, then he’s also discouraging people from visiting and spending their money in Florida. I don’t think even Donald Trump, who doesn’t understand that Americans pay for higher tariffs on China, is that stupid. Most governors want tourists to visit and spend money in their states, right?

In Kenny Rogers’ song “The Gambler,” he sings, “You gotta know when to hold them. Know when to fold them. Know when to walk away. Know when to run.” Ron DeSantis needs to know when he shouldn’t be playing poker because he doesn’t know how.

This is why I always try to play poker with Republicans.

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Watch me draw:



  1. Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    The ‘drama’ that keeps pn giving!! I know — it’s FloriDUH, we I live!! …”Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is making his fight against Disney personal. It has less to do with what’s best for the people in the state of Florida and more to do with Boots DeSantis’ fragile ego. In fact, the entire squabble started over his ego.”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Clay, great piece. I wrote the following as part of post today and it fits in with yours:

    “It used to be my former party, the conservative one, held fast to a don’t mess with corporations’ mantra… Nowadays, with said party more concerned with restricting the civil rights of those folks who do not look like the normative party-member, corporations have been realizing to win and keep customers they need to be open-minded about the rights of all citizens. Well that does not sit too well with the Republican party and they are doing what they can to challenge what they are calling “woke investing” or “woke governance.” These corporations are the ones who are doing the job of politicians, even if the motives are not totally altruistic.”

    As an aside, a key job of a leader of an entity is to promote revenue and jobs in his/ her entity. To pick on Disney who brings a significant amount of revenue to the State of Florida is simply beyond unwise. A venture capitalist said in a Ted Talk, do you know what creates jobs? – customers. Someone needs to whisper that in the governor’s ear and tell him to stop being counter productive to growing revenue, especially in state that lives on sales taxes.


    Liked by 1 person

  3. There’s a loophole in that agreement, and it has to do with the wording of the expiration terms:

    “21 years after the death of the last survivor of the descendants of King Charles III, king of England.”

    The title “King of England” (or “Queen of England”) was voided in 1707 in favor of the title “King of Great Britain”, which is the title that Charles now bears. There has been no “King of England” for 316 years, and a clever lawyer could use that to render the agreement invalid.

    Fortunately, the Republicans seem to be lacking in clever lawyers – just the kind that work for Trump.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. They have been working on the fascist end of the party for a while it’s just become more and more obvious these last couple of years. But if you read the right books what’s been going on comes to light.


  4. I was just about to complain about the absence of Pizza Rat in this Graphic Editorial when I got a closer look at DeathSentence’s cards.

    Thank you, Clay, and now I will complain about you giving us another image that I can’t unsee!!!😉

    Liked by 1 person

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