Goodbye, Jerk


cjones11182020

Right now, Donald Trump is in the denial stage. He believes he’s won the election and it was stolen from him. But even Hitler in his bunker at some point realized the Soviets were knocking on his door and the war was lost.

Is Trump’s denial greater than Hitler’s? Donald Trump doesn’t even have evidence to base his “stolen election” argument on. Even his lawyers have had to admit that in court as they watch their cases get thrown out.

There is no plausible way for Donald Trump to win the election. He would have to get votes he doesn’t have, that don’t exist, to overturn multiple states where his margin of defeat is greater than his 2016 margin of victory. He would have to overturn an election in a state run by Republicans…where the votes were counted by Republicans. The last grasp for Donald Trump will be to convince Republican legislatures to violate their own state laws and give him their electors.

Donald Trump is in such denial that he’s put Rudy Giuliani in charge of his fraudulent case of election stealing. He’s put a sycophant in charge of stealing the election. The entire hopes of the Trump administration rests on the mind and skills of the guy who confused Four Seasons Hotel for Four Seasons Landscaping and held a press conferences next to a dildo store. Donald Trump has put all his faith into the guy who was tricked by Borat. I hope Rudy gets his own show on Trump TV.

A more likely outcome will be Donald Trump waddling out of the White House with his pants around his ankles and his arms with as much stuff as he can grift out of the White House…then spending the rest of his life tweeting that he’s still president.

As many people on social media have said, “Melania ‘be best’ packing.” But what all will Donald Trump pack. What will he grift from the government in his final weeks, days, hours? Seriously, they should check his pockets as he’s weebling out the door. For that matter, they should check every bag of every member of his administration. How much loot can Javanka carry out?

Prediction: Days, weeks, months, and years after he leaves the White House, we’ll read reports on what he and his administration took with them. Expect the large from government contracts, to the petty, like lamps and chairs. Look for stolen computer equipment and office furniture. Am I being petty? No. I have watched these people for the past four years and they don’t have ethics. They will steal everything that’s not nailed to the floor. In fact, maybe we should start nailing things to the floor. I just hope the Resolute Desk isn’t missing when Joe Biden walks into the Oval Office.

If Donald Trump wants a token from the worst presidential term in the history of presidents, American history, world history, history of the Kiwanis presidents, history of Hair Club for Men presidents…the worst ever…let him take that Andrew Jackson painting. Hopefully, we’ll never have another president as racist as Donald Trump who will want to hang it in the Oval Office. Donald Trump can take that Andrew Jackson painting and hang it in one of his shitty golf resorts next to all the fake Time Magazine covers.

This entire presidency has been delusional. We never got a wall on the border paid for by Mexico. They never found those millions of illegal votes from 2016. Trump never got that Nobel Prize. He’s not going to get his head on Mount Rushmore. And…he’s not going to get a second term.

Donald Trump will go out saying he doesn’t need anything…except your money, our money, MAGA rallies, and a TV network dedicated to his delusions so he can continue to spread lies and hate to his millions of fucknut followers.

But we don’t need Donald Trump, his lies, or his delusions.

Goodbye, Trump. Goodbye, Grifter. And if you haven’t stolen it, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Creative note: I used this concept in April, 2017. I thought I was in a good place since neither of my proofer’s remembered that.

Update: I’ll provide this update in tomorrow’s blog too. I think I should be open and share this as maybe it’ll help others. I got the phone call this morning and I have tested positive for the coronavirus.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. And since someone asked this morning, yes. You can still get a signed print for $40.

Watch me draw.

9 comments

  1. Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    Goodbye to the worst of the worst … more than four years of abuse!! #NeverForget … #NeverForgive … “Goodbye, Trump. Goodbye, Grifter. And if you haven’t stolen it, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m still laughing!!!!!!!!!!! “A more likely outcome will be Donald Trump waddling out of the White House with his pants around his ankles and his arms with as much stuff as he can grift out of the White House…then spending the rest of his life tweeting that he’s still president”

    Liked by 1 person

  3. As always, loved the cartoon and commentary…until the “Update”! I am so sorry to learn that you have tested positive for Covid-19. Wishing you a speedy and full recovery from the horrid coronavirus. Thank-you!

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Clay I am so upset to hear you are not well. Are you on instagram still? I don’t have fb any more…

    I am watching this space. Please keep us posted dammit. I am worrying about you.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Reblogged this on Scotties Toy Box and commented:
    Hello Claytoonz. so very true, well said. Hugs

    Prediction: Days, weeks, months, and years after he leaves the White House, we’ll read reports on what he and his administration took with them. Expect the large from government contracts, to the petty, like lamps and chairs. Look for stolen computer equipment and office furniture. Am I being petty? No. I have watched these people for the past four years and they don’t have ethics. They will steal everything that’s not nailed to the floor. In fact, maybe we should start nailing things to the floor. I just hope the Resolute Desk isn’t missing when Joe Biden walks into the Oval Office.

    Like

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