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Among the 20 Democrats running for president (somebody please go home), we have a 37-year-old openly gay mayor; two African American senators; a 44-year-old Latino ex-Cabinet secretary; and a half-dozen women. And with the most diverse presidential field in history, the two candidates leading the 20-person field are 77-year-old Bernie Sanders and 76-year-old Joe Biden. According to the polls, one of these old white guys in his 70s will be facing off against 72-year-old white guy Donald Trump.
Oh, I’m sorry. Did I say Donald Trump is old? He’s not old because he said he’s not old. Trump stated, “I just feel like a young man. I’m so young. I can’t believe it. I’m the youngest person — I am a young, vibrant man. I look at Joe. I don’t know about him. I don’t know.” That’s from a mind sharp as a tack, people.
Here’s the thing. If you’re in your 70’s, you’re old. You’re way past qualifying for AARP, you get the old-people specials at Denny’s even if you’re not eating at 4:00 p.m, and you get away with saying stupid things like, “Oranges of investigations.” People are like, cut him some slack. He’s old and afraid of stairs. Trump is at the point where servants have to cut his food for him. Does Gerbers make Hamberder flavor?
And Trump is afraid of stairs or any long treks on foot. He drives his golf cart on the green because walking from the cart to the hole is hard. He wouldn’t walk with other European leaders during one summit and instead took a golf cart because walking is hard. After one long debate, he complained about how long he had to stand…which is truly difficult if you’ve never worked hard in your life.
He accused Jeb Bush of being “low energy” and Hillary Clinton of not having “stamina” for the job of president, yet you can sell ad space on the bags under his eyes.
Trump doesn’t have wit and he’s not creative. His nickname for Joe Biden is “Sleepy Joe.” He’s used “sleepy” for at least two other Joes. Trump also questioned Biden’s intelligence which was also rich. Then, Trump compared his age to Biden. Biden said if Trump is vibrant compared to him then he needs to “go home.”
Biden opened his campaign by going after Trump’s comments on Charlottesville, where Trump said there were “very fine people on both sides,” referring to both groups of protesters. The thing is, “very fine people” don’t march with people chanting “Blood and soil” and “Jews will not replace us.”
Trump is afraid of Biden because he appeals to voters in Pennsylvania, Michigan, and Wisconsin, three states Trump needed help from Russians to win. Or maybe he can’t envision anyone beating him who doesn’t look like him. Maybe it’s not plausible to Trump that voters replace him with a woman, or a black woman, or a young man, or a gay young man. Maybe for Trump, the only person who can beat Trump is another old white guy.
There’s nothing wrong with being in your 70’s. I hope I get there myself. You have life left. You can be vibrant. But you’re old. Accept it. And if Trump is able to convince his followers of this lie, that he’s not old in his 70’s, that will be the result of some serious gaslighting.
But how much enthusiasm do Democrats and Independents have for two old white guys? Sure, Trump voters are enthusiastic about the racism, but for people who aren’t racist troglodytes, the only enthusiasm we have is to get rid of Trump. There’s nothing really new with Joe Biden.
But, the Nazis, white nationalists, and people who love betraying their nation to Russia are very enthusiastic for four more years of the cruelest administration in American history. So we need to get very enthusiastic about replacing Trump even if it’s with another old white guy.
Creative notes: I was really proud that last week I only had to submit two drawings before my editor selected a cartoon. This week, I sent 14. Why so many? I don’t blame CNN. I blame myself. I don’t think I was sending a lot of good ideas. Then, they picked the third cartoon I drew. I spent seven hours drawing roughs but as tiring as that can be, there is a sense of accomplishment when a cartoon is selected.
I’m going to be out of town next week when we do this, so that should be interesting.
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“I am a young, vibrant man.”
When 45* said this, he was actually fantasizing that he was a VIBRATOR being vigorously used by a YOUNG beautiful woman (Ivanka?).
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As an almost 73 year old white guy. I am sorely disappointed that two old white guys are our leading candidates. It was my generation that changed the country in the 60’s then seriously fucked it up thereafter. It is time for a change. Barack Obama was a start. Let’s take the next step and put a Kamala Harris or Elizabeth Warren in office.
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A M E N ! !
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‘Scuse me, but 70 is not old – it’s only “old-ER”. “Old” is always 10 years older than you are at the moment. To a 20-yr-old, 30 is old; to a 30-yr-old, 40 is old; to a 60-yr-old, 70 is old. You get the picture.
Besides, “old” is in the mind. Well, a little “old” is also in the hands, the back, the bladder, the eyes. . . . . Point is, you always hope to get there some day. As “THEY” say, “It beats the alternative”!
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