CNN

Bulletproof The Baby


CNN08112019

Here’s your cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

Rich, my editor at CNN sent me a story about bulletproof backpacks. He told me it made him sad. It makes me sad too that now bulletproof backpacks are on the back-to-school shopping list. That’s a little messed up.

If conservatives get their solution, there will be armed guards at every school, mall, Wal-Mart, theater, shopping center, nightclub, etc. For gun nuts, forcing parents to spend $300 on an item that protects your child if a shooter only aims at their back at the right time of day is a better solution than having fewer shooters.

It’s not that I’m against bulletproof backpacks. I’m against the need for bulletproof backpacks. We don’t need assault rifles in the hands of private ownership. We just don’t. I’m against this environment where parents can’t focus solely on their children’s education without worrying whether they’re going to come home alive.

Republicans are against increasing fundings in education. They’re against feeding the poor kids. But, they’ll gladly support increased spending to put armed guards in every school.

And the president? He and Melania posed with a baby who is now an orphan because its parents were killed by a white supremacist motivated by Trump’s rhetoric. Trump would rather focus on protecting his feelings than that child. They don’t make backpacks that will protect Donald Trump’s thin skin, but they do make a news network for that.

We shouldn’t need bulletproof backpacks to protect our children. You don’t need an assault rifle to protect yourself. Nobody needs a narcissistic, whiny, thin-skinned, man-baby president.

Support the cartoonist

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Advertisements

Dems Dumb Debate


CNN08042019

Here’s your weekly cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

This isn’t a complaint because it happens occasionally in this business: My editor and I spent a few hours deciding which cartoon to use and what was the best angle of the subject. He wanted me to do something on the debate and I suggested we focus on the candidates’ focus on Obama and their criticism of him as a means to attack Joe Biden. He agreed. I put a lot of work in the cartoon. He put a lot of work into the newsletter. And then, nobody cared about this subject by the time Sunday arrived.

And that’s not a complaint because there was a much bigger and more important story on Sunday. I’m not upset that this cartoon was basically dead and got no interest online. No. My complaint is that with the other story, we have to have the same conversation again and then again that goes nowhere.

I have a year and four months to hit the presidential election which many will say is too much time. I think I’m going to have the rest of my life to talk about white supremacy, white nationalism, racism, and gun violence. That’s too much time too.

Support the cartoonist

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Punchy Joe


CNN07282019

Here’s your weekly cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

There will be two Democratic debates this week on CNN, one on Tuesday and Wednesday nights. They’re being staged in Detroit. Michigan is a state Trump surprisingly won in 2016 with a huge assist from Russia. It’ll be a major battleground in 2020.

What analysists are focusing on before the debates are that on night one, Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders will be on the same stage. On night two, Biden’s podium will be between Cory Booker and Kamala Harris, the two candidates he’s been feuding with.

The expectation is that Warren and Sanders, the two most liberal and socialist candidates, will have to go after each other at some point. I don’t expect that yet. It’s too early. What we can expect on night one is a moderate Democrat going after both of them. We may see the socialists team up.

Biden has promised not to be as polite as he was during the first debate where Harris took him down for his stance in the 70s on mandatory busing. He’s also been at it with Booker who has demanded Biden apologize for boasting about his working relationship with segregationists in the past. Biden wasn’t ready in the last debate. Will he be ready now?

Biden is the favorite candidate at this point and leading in the polls. Even a Fox News poll has him beating Trump. But what happens when he’s on a debate stage with Trump? Personally, I’d rather see Kamala Harris, a former prosecutor, prosecute Donald Trump to his face.

Other things to look for is that Andrew Yang has been going at it with Michael Bennett. Does anyone care?

We can look at Tom Steyer. Oh, wait. He won’t be at the debate and is one more candidate we don’t need.

Will Pete Buttigieg build, fall, or continue to tread water? Will Julian Castro build on his great performance from the first debate? Will Beto finally fold and drop out?

That’s the thing to look for after the debates. After the last one, Eric Swalwell did us all a favor, and himself, and dropped out. He’s doing a great job in Congress and that’s where he should stay. But right now, there are too many candidates. I’d like to see ten of them drop out. C’mon, guys and girls. Go home.

Previously, I didn’t have a favorite. I was going back and forth between the candidates and there are several I still like. But, now I do have a favorite and its been that way for the past few weeks. My pick is Kamala Harris. I like her. She’s a fighter and Donald Trump is afraid of her. I love the job she’s performed in grilling Trump nominees from her position in the Senate. I’m not saying she’s going to win, but that she’s who I want to win. At least for now. I have the right to change my pick. But right now, Kamala is the only one I can feel any excitement for.  I think with the right campaign, she can beat Trump.

Support the cartoonist

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Don’t Mess Around With Jim


cjones07182019

Donald Trump, who only hires the “best people,” just lost his ninth cabinet member. Trump has had more turnover in his cabinet in the first two and a half years of his presidency than any of his five immediate predecessors did in their entire first terms.

News flash! Donald Trump does NOT hire the best people. He hires cronies, freaks, sycophants, goons, bums, right-wing zealots, white nationalists, fucknuts, shitweasels, and members of his family, which I know is redundant. Another reason he goes through so many people (other than wearing them out from Trump fuckery) is that he doesn’t vet properly. This is a guy who hired a wife beater for his staff. This is a guy who hired Omarosa, Steve Bannon, and Stephen Baby Goebbels Miller.

Trump’s labor secretary has been under fire ever since federal prosecutors in New York brought new charges of sex trafficking against Jeffery Epstein last week, who had received a sweetheart prosecution deal from Acosta years ago.

Acosta gave an extremely long press conference to defend his handling of the Epstein case. According to inside sources, Trump pushed Acosta to explain himself to the press and the American people. Acosta believed the performance helped save his job and word is Trump was very pleased with it as well…until he watched TV.

Acosta abruptly resigned Friday morning, citing his presence as a distraction for Trump and the “great” economy they claim they created. Trump claims it was Acosta’s idea to resign, but after watching critical coverage of the press conference, he began questioning whether he should keep the guy. Trump is that guy who asks if his pants make his ass look fat when it’s his fat ass making his ass look fat.

The impression is Trump affiliates with pedophiles, rapists, and creepers. You know, contemporaries.

Acosta is a distraction for Trump, but not one that hurts the image they want to present on the economy (the image is, Obama created that economy plus, he never hired wife beaters or endorsed pedophiles for elected office). Acosta’s presence is a reminder that Trump has ties to Epstein also…and he too has multiple accusations from women, two accusing him of rape. Donald Trump doesn’t care about justice, law and order, or the treatment of women. He’s more concerned with how it reflects on him, especially going into an election.

Trump has been looking to get an Acosta out of his life, but one who’s been a larger pain in his side than Alex…and who actually does his job. Donald Trump hates CNN’s Jim Acosta, who covers the White House.

Trump has personally attacked Jim Acosta for asking reasonable questions. He charged that he’s “a rude, terrible person,” “fake news” and that CNN should be ashamed for employing him. Trump even tried to “lift” his White House pass because he doesn’t like his questions.

When Trump and White House spokesgoon Sarah Huckabee Sanders attempted to ban Acosta from the White House, other news outlets, including Fox News, came to the reporter’s defense. A federal judge, who was appointed by Trump, ordered Acosta’s pass to be restored.

Acosta has a new book recounting his time covering the Trump White House, titled, The Enemy of the People: A Dangerous Time to Tell the Truth in America. Trump and his sycophants have made this a dangerous time to tell the truth, and that’s exactly how they want it.

In the book, Acosta describes a Trump supporter at a rally being surprised that he recited the pledge of allegiance and sang “The Star-Spangled Banner.” He was surprised because Trump has convinced his deplorables that the press is the “enemy of the American people.” It is a dangerous time to tell the truth in America.

Personally, I’m glad the right Acosta has quit his job. This nation doesn’t need Alexander, but it needs Jim to continue to hold Trump and his goon squad accountable.

And, if Jim Acosta ever does stop covering the White House, I’m sure Trump will hold a party. But, it won’t be nearly as big as the party we’re gonna have when he leaves the White House.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch Me Draw.

Trump’s Dinghy


CNN06022019

Here’s your weekly cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

The new normal is that it was not “unreasonable” to ask the Navy to hide a ship with the name “John McCain” on it in order to avoid offending a thin-skinned Trump and that whoever did it had the “best intentions.”

In North Korea, they kill staffers who disappointed Kim Jong Un. In what’s becoming our banana republic without bananas, staffers are scrambling to appease our Dear Leader, even on foreign soil

Donald Trump attacked John McCain while campaigning for president. If you believe a man can say McCain was only a war hero because he was captured and that he “likes those who weren’t captured” can also be supportive of the military, then you might be in a cult. Donald Trump attacked John McCain after the election. Donald Trump attacked John McCain while McCain was dying. Donald Trump has continued to attack John McCain after he died.

Donald Trump is fighting a dead guy and losing.

Donald Trump is a 72-year-old man baby and in the new normal, it’s perfectly justified to patronize and feed his insecure little orange ego, even to the point of being an international embarrassment. That’s how Trump cultists and Republicans see it. It’s why he needs two scoops of ice cream to everybody else’s one. The president of the United States has to constantly be told he’s the most important baby at the party.

From telling Donald Trump a report that clearly says he’s not exonerated totally exonerates him from hiding a boat named after John McCain’s grandfather with your tiny Republican dinghy in order to avoid a Trump tantrum, Republicans have become nothing but sycophants catering to a pathetic, whiny, little victimized elderly man baby. For them, this is the new normal.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch Me Draw.

Drawing On A Train


train

I’m posting this here in case you don’t follow me on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or in general like a stalker.

On Wednesday, I took an Amtrak to Raleigh, North Carolina. I planned to draw a cartoon in my hotel room that night, work on ideas with CNN on Thursday, attend an event Thursday night, then return Friday morning and draw the CNN cartoon on a train.

I got the idea for drawing on the train Wednesday when I saw people on their laptops in the dining car. There was WiFi, air conditioning, and $10.00 sandwiches that looked like feet. I thought, other than the foot sandwiches, this is nice. I’ll draw my cartoon here Friday morning. With a five-hour train ride, it should be done by the time I get back home in Virginia. I did it but it wasn’t easy.

As soon as the train started rolling, they announced that the WiFi was out. What the? Mother mother effer effer hell hell. Fine. I don’t need WiFi to draw and I could use the 4G service in my phone to email back and forth if I had to. I just couldn’t send the cartoon.

So, I went back to the dining car where the air conditioning was also out. On top of that, there was a constant ringing sound. I asked other people if they could hear it too. They did so it wasn’t just me…thank God. There were also people with crying babies who thought it would be better to annoy the people in the dining car instead of the people in the coach section.

As for the actual drawing, it was very difficult. It was in the nearly-impossible department. The train itself was shaking, but so was the screen on my Surface Pro. Amanda later sent me this article that a lot of users, though rare, are experiencing shaking screens on their Surfaces when they get hot. I’ve had mine for three years and it just started doing this a few months ago.

So, I’m on this train, dripping sweat on a screen that won’t stop shaking with a constant “NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRR!!!!” and crying babies in my ears. It was like being in India without the smell…until for some reason, that showed up too. So, I drew this cartoon just to have some fun with my readers. I took a photo with my phone and tweeted/Facebooked/Instagrammed it out. People loved it. I also sent it to my editors as a joke but they didn’t respond to it. Fortunately, they got a real cartoon shortly before the train got to Fredericksburg, where I didn’t.

The WiFi and air came back in Richmond, so I had about 50 minutes of some comfort. For some reason, my heated-up Surface stopped shaking and I barrelled through with the cartoon. A lot of people standing in line for food were looking over my shoulder, but only one person started a conversation. As it turns out, he is a journalism professor in North Carolina and we became Facebook and real-time friends right there.

And…then I missed my stop.

How’d I miss my stop? The train was running fifteen minutes behind schedule and they were making up for lost time. Usually, when the train stops in Fredericksburg, it takes about five to ten minutes. I was packing my stuff up while a line of people got in front of my table…for food. Why are they jamming the aisles during a stop? I couldn’t get past those people and the train started rolling after only stopping for what I swear was six seconds. At first, I thought it was just moving up a few feet to accommodate people, but then it increased speed and I knew I was going to Quantico…or New York City if I kept missing stops.

Looking back, I shouldn’t have even bothered telling one of the Amtrak guys but I did. He gave me a lecture on how to get off a train and said I needed to tell this other Amtrak guy. The other Amtrak guy then gave me another lecture on how to get off a train. They were extremely defensive and expressed vehemently how missing my stop was my fault and I’m probably an idiot who deserves capital punishment for doing so. Sure. Fine. Build my gallows high, but their lectures weren’t resolving my situation. The second Amtrak dude suggested I get off at Quantico and take an Uber home. I said to the first Amtrak idiot, “Why did you want me to talk to him? He’s less help than you are.” A few minutes later, one of them sought me out to give me another lecture on how to get off a train, and I said, “you need to stop talking to me.” I did not need to get a $50 Uber in Quantico. I bought a $5.00 ticket on the VRE and head south, back to Fredericksburg about ten minutes after getting off the Amtrak.

From there, I went to a bar because I needed a beer. They sell beer on Amtrak, but a Bud Light will cost you about ten dollars.

I drew this cartoon in about two minutes. There is not a video for it. Maybe I should have made one. It would have been about ten seconds long.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Old White Guy 2020


CNN04282019

Here’s your weekly cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign upto get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

Among the 20 Democrats running for president (somebody please go home), we have a 37-year-old openly gay mayor; two African American senators; a 44-year-old Latino ex-Cabinet secretary; and a half-dozen women. And with the most diverse presidential field in history, the two candidates leading the 20-person field are 77-year-old Bernie Sanders and 76-year-old Joe Biden. According to the polls, one of these old white guys in his 70s will be facing off against 72-year-old white guy Donald Trump.

Oh, I’m sorry. Did I say Donald Trump is old? He’s not old because he said he’s not old. Trump stated, “I just feel like a young man. I’m so young. I can’t believe it. I’m the youngest person — I am a young, vibrant man. I look at Joe. I don’t know about him. I don’t know.” That’s from a mind sharp as a tack, people.

Here’s the thing. If you’re in your 70’s, you’re old. You’re way past qualifying for AARP, you get the old-people specials at Denny’s even if you’re not eating at 4:00 p.m, and you get away with saying stupid things like, “Oranges of investigations.” People are like, cut him some slack. He’s old and afraid of stairs. Trump is at the point where servants have to cut his food for him. Does Gerbers make Hamberder flavor?

And Trump is afraid of stairs or any long treks on foot. He drives his golf cart on the green because walking from the cart to the hole is hard. He wouldn’t walk with other European leaders during one summit and instead took a golf cart because walking is hard. After one long debate, he complained about how long he had to stand…which is truly difficult if you’ve never worked hard in your life.

He accused Jeb Bush of being “low energy” and Hillary Clinton of not having “stamina” for the job of president, yet you can sell ad space on the bags under his eyes.

Trump doesn’t have wit and he’s not creative. His nickname for Joe Biden is “Sleepy Joe.” He’s used “sleepy” for at least two other Joes. Trump also questioned Biden’s intelligence which was also rich. Then, Trump compared his age to Biden. Biden said if Trump is vibrant compared to him then he needs to “go home.”

Biden opened his campaign by going after Trump’s comments on Charlottesville, where Trump said there were “very fine people on both sides,” referring to both groups of protesters. The thing is, “very fine people” don’t march with people chanting “Blood and soil” and “Jews will not replace us.”

Trump is afraid of Biden because he appeals to voters in Pennsylvania, Michigan, and Wisconsin, three states Trump needed help from Russians to win. Or maybe he can’t envision anyone beating him who doesn’t look like him. Maybe it’s not plausible to Trump that voters replace him with a woman, or a black woman, or a young man, or a gay young man. Maybe for Trump, the only person who can beat Trump is another old white guy.

There’s nothing wrong with being in your 70’s. I hope I get there myself. You have life left. You can be vibrant. But you’re old. Accept it. And if Trump is able to convince his followers of this lie, that he’s not old in his 70’s, that will be the result of some serious gaslighting.

But how much enthusiasm do Democrats and Independents have for two old white guys? Sure, Trump voters are enthusiastic about the racism, but for people who aren’t racist troglodytes, the only enthusiasm we have is to get rid of Trump. There’s nothing really new with Joe Biden.

But, the Nazis, white nationalists, and people who love betraying their nation to Russia are very enthusiastic for four more years of the cruelest administration in American history. So we need to get very enthusiastic about replacing Trump even if it’s with another old white guy.

Creative notes: I was really proud that last week I only had to submit two drawings before my editor selected a cartoon. This week, I sent 14. Why so many? I don’t blame CNN. I blame myself. I don’t think I was sending a lot of good ideas. Then, they picked the third cartoon I drew. I spent seven hours drawing roughs but as tiring as that can be, there is a sense of accomplishment when a cartoon is selected.

I’m going to be out of town next week when we do this, so that should be interesting.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch the video.