Butt No Collusion

Trump lies. According to one count in the media (yeah, fake news), he averages six and a half lies a day. It’s been said that the one person you don’t lie to is your lawyer. But what happens when you not only lie to your lawyers but you ignore their advice and torpedo your own case?

Some lawyers quit, as John Dowd and Ty Cobb have done. There’s talk that White House Counsel Don McGahn wants out and expects the newly hired white-shoe lawyer Emmet Flood to take over. Unfortunately for Mr. Flood, his shoes won’t remain white for long because Trump’s other new lawyer, Rudy Giuliani, is as much of a lying, corrupt, narcissistic dumbass as the client.

Without any consultation with the other members of his legal team, Trump sent Rudy out to tell Sean Hannity that he knew about the payment to Stormy Daniels. He also changed the reasoning Trump fired James Comey, called the FBI “stormtroopers,” and threw Jared under the bus as being disposable.

They were mopping up the next day and Trump excused Rudy’s performance by saying he just started, he’s learning the subject matter, and he’ll get his facts straight. OK. So if he just started and doesn’t know shit then why did you send him out to talk about the subject matter? And why did you send him out again the next day to vomit-puke on Fox & Friends?

Sure, this entire matter is about a porn star Trump slept with before he was president, but when you lie every day, revise your story with another lie, deny your past statements which have been recorded, and send your minions and goons like Giuliani and Sarah Huckabee Sanders to lie, then why should anyone ever believe anything coming out of your administration? How are we supposed to have confidence in your ability to do, well, anything?

Now it has come out that Trump knew about the payment to Stormy Daniels months before he denied it. No shit. You don’t have $130,000 deducted from your bank account and just wonder where it went. According to Rudy, when Trump recently learned what it was for he acted as though a mystery was solved. Most people go nuts with a mystery deduction of ten bucks from their bank account. Even a billionaire, if Trump really is one, would question $130,000. We all know how cheap Trump is. None of the stories coming from Cohen, Trump, Giuliani or any of their other idiots are believable.

To Trump’s new lawyer, and his future new lawyers, have fun. You’re going to need a mop. Also, take one good look at Rudy Giuliani. That’s your future.

Creative notes: I had this idea earlier in the week but put it on hold the night Rudy went on Fox. Yeah, I drew a similar disgusting pose a couple cartoons ago, but I liked this idea too much not to do it. Also, sorry for your eyes.

Here’s the video.

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