Donald Trump actually did something boring. He made Indiana governor Mike Pence his vice presidential running mate. Boooooooooooring. There’s a lot of disappointed editorial cartoonists in America right now.
There weren’t a lot of people who wanted the job. Chris Christie wanted it because he’s pretty done messing up New Jersey. He’s probably in line for Attorney General, but that’s a pipe dream because Trump will not be president. Newt Gingrich wanted the job but even he realized that two blowhards on one ticket would be one too many. I could totally see Newt as Trump’s chief of staff.
There are rumors Trump had second thoughts on picking Pence. Those aren’t confirmed but it’s not too hard to imagine Trump gave in to his kids and GOP operatives to pick someone who won’t make stupid statements. All Pence has really done is publicly hate gays and try to deny them wedding cakes and pizza. That’s a nice guy compared to most Republicans.
But if cartoonists are disappointed with Pence, there’s joy to be had from the new logo. The new logo for the Trump/Pence ticket is very penetrating. It looks like the T is violating the P, just in case there was any doubt who is whose beyotch on that team.
Did you think Hillary Clinton’s logo was bad? I don’t think her logo is that terrible, though the arrow is pointing in the wrong direction. Trump’s logo looks like it was drawn on a napkin at one of the restaurants in Trump Tower, then sharpened up by an intern using Photoshop. Trump has a history of not paying contractors and I’d say that he’d refuse to pay this designer, except he probably did get it for free. It doesn’t look anything like something a professional designer would want credit for. It’s a bit too rapey.
TPing is pretty much what Trump wants to do to America. If he wins we’ll wake up the next morning as if it’s the day after Halloween and try to figure out how to get the soggy toilet paper out from the top of the trees some dimwit threw up there.
For those who are not familiar with the term “TP,” or “TPing,” it’s when someone covers your house, yard, car, mailbox, etc, with toilet paper. It’s usually committed on Halloween night and only by someone who knows you. The culprit can be a friend, an enemy, or even someone who has a crush on you but won’t admit it. It’s pretty harmless vandalism as there’s no damage to property or person, unless you fall off a ladder trying to remove the stuff from your chimney. It’s not very environmental.
I have to admit that when I was a young teen living in Georgia my friends and I TP’ed our share of homes. We’d usually hit the homes of hot girls from our school (it sucked if they lived in apartments but that’s what eggs are for). I even heard one girl was upset to find her house had not been hit by TP bandits. One night three of us hit several houses and then after one of us went home, the other two (Walter and I) went over to his house and hit his. He called us the next day to talk about the bad karma he incurred by TPing houses since his had been hit. We hit his trees, house, cars, mailbox, we even tried to TP the dog but he wouldn’t cooperate. We went over while he was cleaning his yard to express our outrage and that we’d keep our ears open and try to catch the bastards who perpetrated such a dastardly offense. I don’t think we ever did tell him it was us. He probably would have been disappointed it wasn’t girls.
I’m afraid what Trump and Pence have in mind for America isn’t as harmless. I bet the TP would be used. However, if Trump markets toilet paper as in this cartoon I’m sure it’d be a YUGE seller.
Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!