Little Snot Machine


cjones08162015

You never hear the Pro Life crowd cry about poor children starving. They don’t think the government should fund their school lunch. They want to cut education (so they stand a chance to be as dumb as they are). They definitely do not want them to have sex education in schools. They don’t want them to have insurance if the government has to assist. They’re in favor of stripping welfare away from a child if the father smokes marijuana. They don’t want the government do anything for that kid. They don’t even want to give kids in poverty cheese. Cheese! Have you seen school cheese? It’s almost a punishment forcing that upon kids.

If the kid is still in the womb then they’re all caring. It’s all they talk about. They don’t talk about what happens after the child is born. I guess it’s the Christian thing to care about a fetus but not the child. Of course in the Bible children were sacrificed so maybe it is the Christian thing to do.

They’re all about taking away funding from Planned Parenthood. Never mind the fact that abortions only account for 3% of what Planned Parenthood does. And never mind the fact that Planned Parenthood prevents a LOT of abortions and that federal funding does not pay for abortions. Hell, never mind the fact that Planned Parenthood is not harvesting fetus body parts for profit. These prolife wingnuts are so adamant about killing funding for Planned Parenthood that they’ll shut down the government over it.

Do an experiment on your own. Go to one of your Pro Life wingnut friend’s Twitter or Facebook account (Make sure you’re sober when you do this or you won’t be able to stomach the stupid, get angry and leave all sorts of smack talk and you’ll wake up to 128 notifications on your cell phone). Scroll back a few weeks and count how many times they have posted a meme or update on anything to do with abortions or Planned Parenthood. Now count how many times they’ve posted something out of concern for a living child. Don’t waste your time scrolling too far down past all the Jesus, Ann Coulter, and Ben Carson memes looking for that second thing because you’re not going to find it.

The good news about these people are that they are easily outsmarted. They’re not rational and they don’t have a grasp for reality so it should be easy to beat them at election time. Look at their presidential candidates. They believe one of these guys is going to win the presidency. The bad news is that there are so many of them, they lie, they spread misinformation, and they vote.

If men could get abortions there would be huge advances in science to prevent pregnancies and there would be safer abortions. There would not be any men against abortion, unless they’re fertile. There would be morning after Red Bull and Five-Hour Energy Abortion drinks and they would come in assorted flavors. Abortions would be sold at 7-11. They would have a Big Gulp-Big Bite-abortion special.

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One comment

  1. It seems to me that a society not caring for its children born or unborn is irrational. Most pro life people I know care deeply for their children and others as well. The way they go about it – adopting, foster parenting or grandparenting, supporting schools, volunteering time, giving to youth programs, etc says more to me than whether or not they vote that the government do it.

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