GOP

Abnormal Texas


I hope someday Texas evolves beyond the Republican Party because the diversity in that state grows on a daily basis while the GOP keeps regressing. And as far-right and as out of touch as national Republicans are, Texas Republicans are even worse. And I hope Texas outgrows the GOP before the GOP makes it illegal for nonwhites to vote, which they’re working on.

Texas Republicans are the Texas Taliban. Just like the Taliban, they want to control women, condemn homosexuality, and govern by religious dogma. Don’t believe me? Check out the new state party platform the Texas fucknuts devised over the weekend.

Texas Republicans had their convention over the weekend in Houston. Texas Republicans are so far right that they booed Texas Republicans. They booed their Senator, John Cornyn, for working with Democrats on gun legislation (that doesn’t even touch guns) and they booed Texas Republican congressman Dan Crenshaw.

Alex Stein is a conservative comedian which means he’s not funny. Case in point: He thinks calling a guy who lost an eye while fighting in a war who he perceives as being a RINO (Republican in name only) “Eyepatch McCain.” Maybe Stein isn’t that creative as he’s just repeating a nickname Tucker Carlson came up with, but Stein was there. Support our troops, eh, Republicans?

This is why conservatives make lousy comedians. They’re not funny and they don’t even understand they’re supposed to write their own material. C’mon, they’re not conservative political cartoonists.

There was a scuffle between Crenshaw’s security tean and Stein and his goons. Crenshaw later tweeted, “This is what happens when angry little boys like @alexstein99 don’t grow up and can’t get girlfriends…” Damn. Crenshaw is funnier than the conservative comedian. I expect conservative comedian Stein to retort with, “Oh yeah? Well…you’re the one who can’t get a girlfriend. High five!”

But back to this platform. You’re going to love it never at all.

Among the proposals for the platform is that President Biden was NOT legitimately elected. Yes, they want to make their fucked-up conspiracy theories an official part of their platform. I’m shocked they’re not inserting shit into their platform about Hugo Chavez, Italian satellites, and bamboo ballots. Did I just give them some ideas?

They didn’t allow Log Cabin Republicans to have a booth at the convention as their platform is now declaring homosexuality an “abnormal lifestyle choice” while it’s not “abnormal” or a “choice.” The only thing I can see abnormal about gay Republicans is that they’re gay Republicans. Why the fuck do they want to be in a party that hates them? I don’t understand this the same way I don’t understand why any blacks would vote Republican.

I used to say the same thing about Republicans who claim to be patriots yet support a fascist movement until I realized they’re lying about the patriot part.

Other goodies in the new platform oppose efforts to classify carbon dioxide as a pollutant, repeal the 16th Amendment (which established the income tax), and bring prayer back into public schools, courthouses, and public buildings.

The platform supports abolishing abortion and recognizing life begins at fertilization before anything has entered the womb. It gets crazier. They want to mandate that Texas students “learn about the humanity of the preborn child,” in part by forcing students to listen to ultrasounds of gestating fetuses. That’s some real Taliban shit there.

The platform is also calling for ending the 1965 Voting Rights Act which Republicans nationally are doing anyway but calling it “voting integrity” in order not to say the racist quiet part out loud. In Texas, they say the racist quiet part out loud.

You can say this is just a bunch of crazy right-wing oppressive Texans who don’t represent any national movement, but I’ll retort with a “n’yuh-uh.” National Republicans are NOT condemning or speaking out against this platform. They’re going to sit back and see how well it goes over.

When Texas banned abortions and legalized posses to round up abortion doctors and anyone driving a woman to get an abortion, other Republican states started to follow their lead. Mississippi, Missouri, Florida, Oklahoma, Afghanistan, etc… They’re all following these goons.

And after the Supreme Court allows them to ban abortion, other states are going to ban abortion. What’s going to happen after the Supreme Court allows them to put prayer back in school, ignore pollution, repeal all taxes, ban gays, and finally, make it illegal for nonwhites to vote? Other yee-haw states will follow.

Republicans are racist. They have racist policies. They’re backward with women and gay rights. And they’re a bunch of religious zealots. This Texas Republican platform is the mood for the national Republican Party. It’s not that Texas Republicans are abnormal. All Republicans are abnormal.

Texas is just saying all the hateful and regressive parts out loud.

Music Note: I listened to a 90s alt mix while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Uvalde Coverup


Is there a coverup going on about the police response to the Uvalde school massacre?

While the 18-year-old shooter was inside a classroom with elementary students, some who had covered themselves in their classmates’ blood to hide and others who may have been bleeding to death, 19 cops refused to enter the classroom for 90 minutes.

There were cops outside arresting parents who were trying to enter the school to save their children. There were cops inside the hallway. During this time, children were calling the police from inside the classroom. Texas law enforcement has said “oops. Our bad,” but they haven’t provided good reasons as to why they messed this up so bad. There was one honest answer from a law enforcement spokesperson that the cops were afraid the shooter might stop shooting elementary students to shoot at cops.

The Texas Department of Public Safety is no longer investigating the police response as it’s the investigation has been handed over to the Uvalde County District Attorney, who does not plan to share the findings with the public.

The narrative from Texas authorities has shifted numerous times in order to avoid casting blame on law enforcement. In order to shift blame from cops, you have to blame someone else, like teachers and doors.

Texas DPS Director Steven McCraw blamed a teacher for the shooter’s entry into the school, claiming the shooter entered Robb Elementary through a back door a teacher had left propped open. The story changed four days later when the teacher’s lawyer spoke to the San Antonio Express-News.

The teacher did open the door to get her lunch out of her car, saw the gunman coming who had started firing at the school, then she slammed the door shut, which didn’t automatically lock. The DPS now says there’s a video confirming the teacher kicked a rock out that was propping the door open, and she slammed it shut.

Conservatives LOVE LOVE LOVE hating on teachers. They accuse them of teaching Critical Race Theory, which they are not teaching (but schools should be teaching). They claim teachers have a gay agenda in order to attack teachers while being homophobic. Now, they’re blaming teachers for a school shooting.

It’s ridiculous to blame teachers for a mass shooting, especially when two of them are murder victims along with 19 of their students. Cops and Republicans are trying to cover their asses.

What we should blame are guns. We should also blame cops who refused to respond. And, we should blame Republicans who refuse to even debate gun legislation. You can’t have a serious discussion on gun legislation with people who show off their gun collection during the discussion.

We should totally blame Republicans because Republicans are leaving the doors open for school shooters.

Music note: I listened to several artists while drawing this, including M.I.A, and now I’m going to have “some some some a some I murder, some a some I let go” in my head all day.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Disinformation Board


In their criticism of the Department of Homeland Security’s newly-created Disinformation Governance Board, Republicans have one thing right. It’s a stupid name. Maybe the agency thought that “governance” would explain the anti-disinformation part, but they failed to take into account that Republicans don’t do well with the comprehension of things. And it’s not like they want to comprehend anything anyway when they have a new talking point or red meat to throw out to their rabid base.

So, what is this disinformation board stuff? I had the same question when I saw a conservative cartoon on it, and then another and another and another, etc, etc, which meant Fox News must be all over it. If you want to know what Fox News is talking about, just read the conservative political cartoons at GoComics. It’ll save you a lot of time and you’ll get a huge laugh out of it as conservative cartoons are hilarious, though that’s inadvertent.

The Department of Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas testified in multiple Congressional hearings last week where he mentioned the Disinformation Governance Board. Yeah, it’s a stupid name. Mayorkas said the board was created to combat misinformation from human smugglers and to counter Russian cyber and election misinformation.

Mayorkas said, “We have just established a mis- and disinformation governance board in the Department of Homeland Security to more effectively combat this threat, not only to election security but to our homeland security.”

Why, golly gee willikers, that sounds like a good idea. Who doesn’t want to fight coyotes smuggling humans in from the southern border and Russian attacks on our country? Republicans, that’s who.

Elon Musk said the creation of the board was “messed up.” Elon might as well be a Republican now because as the GOP became more racist, tried to overturn a Democratic election to install an Oompa-Loompa fascist dictator, defended Russia for attacking our nation’s elections, banned abortion by stealing Supreme Court seats, created new laws to stop black people from voting, and is now at war with a cartoon mouse, has found the Democratic Party too extreme.

Republicans also have issues with the board’s executive director, Nina Jankowicz, because she’s praised efforts to combat coronavirus misinformation on social media and expressed skepticism about the relevance of Hunter Biden’s laptop.

Republicans are also comparing this to the “Ministry of Truth” in George Orwell’s novel, “1984.”

Senator and white nationalist terrorist power-fister Josh Hawley said, “Rather than police our border, Homeland Security has decided to make policing Americans’ speech its top priority.”

Senator Rob Portman said, “I do not believe that the United States government should turn the tools that we have used to assist our allies counter foreign adversaries onto the American people. Our focus should be on bad actors like Russia and China, not our own citizens.”

But the board isn’t policing speech from citizens of this nation. Its focus is on foreign actors like Russian election meddlers and human smugglers from south of the border. Was the Mayorkas’ microphone not turned on during the hearings? Actually, Republicans didn’t ask a lot of questions about the board during those hearings choosing to instead express anger and gaslight it. And there’s the irony.

The Republicans are lying about a board created to combat lies. Republicans don’t get irony.

And just like the way Republicans were angrier with the FBI for going after suspected Russian spies than they were angry with the actual Russian spies, they’re more upset at a board created to combat lies than they are with the lies. Republicans are more upset with this board than they were with Pizzagate.

Republicans are way off base here and are claiming (another lie) that the board is going to have some sort of authority or ability to shut Americans up. Yeah, I wish. It’s more of that typical Republican doomsday shit where they tell their base, “They’re coming to getcha. Vote Republican.”

Mayorkas has explained, “The board does not have any operational authority or capability,” he said. “What it will do is gather together best practices in addressing the threat of disinformation from foreign state adversaries, from the cartels, and disseminate those best practices to the operators that have been executing in addressing this threat for years.”

Mayorkas said the board was part of an effort whose “goal is to bring the resources of the department together to address this threat,” specifically citing misinformation disseminated to Spanish speakers. 

As I said, Republicans weren’t listening. Jim Jordan asked the director if the board would look into “misinformation” spread by Dr. Anthony Fauci and…wait for it…Hunter Biden’s laptop. Seriously. You can’t talk about shit in Washington without a Republican bringing up Hunter Biden’s laptop.

Jordan is especially opposed to Jankowicz leading the board as she once tweeted that Hunter Biden’s laptop should be viewed as a “Trump campaign product” because of top Trump allies’ role in pushing it. Again, this Republican was missing the irony that during his questioning, he was a Trump ally pushing Hunter Biden’s laptop as a campaign product.

Jankowica tweeted last week, “one of the key reasons the Board was established, is to maintain the [DHS’s] commitment to protecting free speech, privacy, civil rights, & civil liberties.” So, pushing right-wing bullshit is NOT part of the board’s agenda?

Republicans don’t understand free speech. They don’t understand that no one owes them a platform to lie. They don’t understand that organizing a terrorist attack to topple our government isn’t free speech or protected in the Constitution. They don’t comprehend that accusing a political opponent of a crime, like raping children, isn’t freedom of speech and is actually libelous.

Republicans are the party of lies, conspiracy theories, and bullshit. They tell us that Russia didn’t attack our nation to help Donald Trump win an election, except Russia did exactly that. They tell us there are millions of incidents of voter fraud in the 2020 election, which is another lie. They’re changing voting laws based on the election fraud lie. They lie that public schools are teaching Critical Race Theory and are indoctrinating elementary students into becoming gay. It has become impossible for a Republican to talk about any issue without lying. Don’t believe me? Then why don’t you have a nice tall glass of bleach?

Let’s not even look at the lunatics in the party like Lauren Boebert, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Matt Gaetz, or Madison Cawthorn. Ignore Rudy Giuliani, Sidney Powell, and Rand Paul for a minute. Let’s look at the leaders. Mitch McConnell lied about Supreme Court seats as he was stealing them. He’s currently lying about the filibuster because he’s going to destroy that after the GOP takes the Senate in order to ban abortion. Kevin McCarthy lies about telling Trump he’s responsible for the January 6 attack, despite there being tapes of him saying that. And speaking of Trump, he told over 30,000 while he was president (sic).

If there’s a new agency created to go after liars, then why are Republicans so afraid? Oh, yeah. Because they’re liars. Republicans are the enemies of truth.

Music Note: Today’s cartooning music was Better Than Ezra which might be some more disinformation because I don’t know if they’re actually better than someone named Ezra.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Slice of Conspiracy


Some of the Republicans asking Ketanji Brown Jackson questions were using their time, not asking serious questions for a nominee to the Supreme Court of the United States, but were instead auditioning for the 2024 presidential race…that is, if Donald Trump lets them run. And while trying to make Fox News, OANN, and Newsmax highlight reels, they were throwing dog whistles to Qanon.

Do you remember the pizzagate conspiracy that claimed Hillary Clinton was running a child sex ring out of the basement of a pizza parlor in Washington, DC? This was generated from Clinton Campaign chief John Podesta’s email which was hacked by Russia, given to Wikileaks, then loudly broadcast by Donald Trump.

Just like with Hunter Biden’s supposed laptop, the people screaming about the hacked emails from the Clinton Campaign can’t tell you what’s in them. And since they couldn’t find anything scandalous, they had to create one. They claimed, “let’s get a pizza” was code for child pornography. It’s too much of a rabbit hole to go down to explain how all this landed in a DC pizzeria that doesn’t even have a basement, but it was generated by Qanon on 4chan and other assorted hate sites. Eventually, a North Carolina fucknut with a rifle drove up to DC and shot into the establishment.

This was the birth of Qanon. Since then, it’s grown into a conspiracy theory that deep-state Democrats are operating a pedophilia ring and Donald Trump was on a mission to bring it down. Some Qnuts theorists claim the pedophile deep-state Democrats are also lizard people. Seriously.

Of course, it’s laughable to believe that Qanon and Republicans care all that much about stopping pedophilia. They were silent on former House Speaker Dennis Hastert being a pedophile. You don’t hear them asking what Jim Jordan knew when college wrestlers were being victimized while he was coaching them. They were all defensive of Roy Moore spending more time in mall food courts than Debbie Gibson did in the 80s. And I haven’t heard one demand an investigation into the accusation that Donald Trump raped a teenager.

They accuse President Joe Biden of being a pedophile and joke about it where you have to be a Qanon goon to even understand the reference, like with “Let’s go Brandon.” What are they talking about? Also, ask one of them, any of them, what’s on Hunter’s laptop? Why are they OK with it being stolen? Why are they OK with contents being spied on without there ever being a FISA warrant? Oh, wait…they don’t really care about FISA warrants either. It’s like the Constitution to them. They only care about something if it can be weaponized. You don’t hear Devin Nunes screaming that Hunter Biden’s rights have been violated. But then again, maybe he’s too busy trying to get Truth Social off the ground.

Senators Tom Cotton, Josh Hawley, Ted Cruz, and Marsha Blackburn were asking Judge Jackson about sentences she gave to pedophiles. As it turns out, they were normal and in line with other judges’ sentences. But, they’ve created the narrative she’s soft on pedophiles, never mind the fact that she sent them to prison. Fun fact: When Josh Hawley was a horse-faced Missouri prosecutor, he let a sex abuser get off with only probation.

These senators wasted very important time on their own political ambitions instead of doing their jobs. And instead of denouncing Qanon, which is a cult comprised of insane racists and terrorists, they feed the beast. After Senator Josh Hawley first started his attacks on Judge Jackson being soft of pedophiles, online threats against her life have been made by Qanon goons.

Tom Cotton, Marsha Blackburn, Ted Cruz, Josh Hawley, and the majority of the Republican Party are appealing to racist hateful people who will tear this nation apart and destroy democracy if they’re not given what they want.

The entire Republican Party is now a cult and instead of fighting to save it, these senators feed it to the cult.

By the way, the pizzagate shooter was sentenced by…wait for it…Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson. She gave him four years in prison. Fact is, Judge Jackson sent Qanon terrorists to prison. Maybe that’s another reason for Republicans to hate her.

Music Note: I listened to the Violent Femmes but did NOT play “Blister in the Sun.”

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Mr. Zelensky Goes To Washington


As Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelensky virtually addressed Congress today, I wondered, “What did they do with Lauren Boebert, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Matt Gaetz, Louie Gohmert, and Madison Cawthorn? For that matter, how dare any member of the Republican Party attend who had refused to impeach Donald Trump for his attempt to extort the Ukrainian president.

During President Biden’s State of the Union address to Congress, Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene heckled and cackled like mean girls throughout his speech. In order not to risk further embarrassment to his party, or even worse, the nation, did Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy lock them in the congressional basement? There’s no real reason for the most ridiculous members of Congress to attend anyway since none of them have ever expressed any interest in doing their jobs. Did Marco Rubio tweet a selfie with Zelensky on the monitor behind him to show he’s not a ridiculous individual?

Did pro-Russian flunkies Jim Jordan and Devin Nunes attend? Maybe Vladimir Putin could have given the Republican response.

The Republican Party refused to punish Donald Trump for the crime of trying to extort a foreign president, which he did by withholding military aid funded by Congress until Zelensky gave him the political dirt he wanted. This was aid intended to protect Ukraine from a Russian invasion. This was a crime yet the entire Republican Party refused to take it seriously and instead, made excuses for their corrupt leader. It’s illegal for a political campaign to receive donations from a foreigner, especially a foreign government.

Republicans are still claiming it’s a hoax that Russia helped Donald Trump, yet there’s a recording they ignore of him explicitly asking a foreign government to dig up dirt on a political opponent.

Now, the same goons who were OK with Trump’s extortion attempt are all wearing stern and serious-looking faces while they talk about creating a no-fly zone over Ukraine and other means to support that nation. They should have taken it seriously when Trump used military aid to grift Volodymyr Zelensky instead of wasting the past two years repeating Rudy Giuliani’s ridiculous crap about Hunter Biden and his laptop. Hey, why doesn’t Rudy go to Ukraine now to continue his investigation into Hunter Biden? No? Why not?

President Zelensky thanked the U.S. for its assistance but pleaded for more. He compared Russia’s assault on the Ukrainian people to the attack on Pearl Harbor and said it was like a daily 9/11. He played a graphic video of Russia’s assault on the Ukrainian civilian population, including the attacks on children.

Yesterday, President Biden signed into law a bill that includes $13.6 billion for assistance to Ukraine. After Zelensky’s speech, he announced an additional $800 million to support Ukraine’s defense against Russia.

As much as we would like to help Ukraine, we still can’t get involved in the fighting. A military conflict between the United States and Russia, as inept of a military as they are, will widen the war into a much larger conflict that would involve even more nations. A war between the U.S. and Russia could eventually lead to nuclear warfare as Vladimir Putin may be unstable. Do you want to play a game? A no-fly zone over Ukraine enforced by NATO takes us from hyperboles about World War III to a very real possibility of U.S. and NATO jets shooting down Russian jets.

The Republican Party didn’t just allow Donald Trump to extort the president of Ukraine. They sat back and watched him try to destroy NATO. If the Republicans had their way, there wouldn’t be a NATO today preventing Putin from extending his war beyond Ukraine.

The GOP is best at being the Party of No, giving empty criticism, creating lies, heckling, taking selfies while giving out classified information, and spreading conspiracy theories. Let’s let the adults figure out how best to help Ukraine.

Music Note: I listened to an alt-rock station on my music streamer while drawing this.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Republican Tip Lines


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Virginia’s new Republican sweater vest governor (sic), Glenn Youngkin, has set up a “tip line” for parents to snitch on public school teachers who are promoting “divisive practices” or enforcing mask mandates.

This tip line follows the governor’s (sic) very first executive order banning any history being taught that makes white people feel bad. The actual wording for the ban is “inherently divisive concepts, including Critical Race Theory.” Thankfully, there’s nothing divisive in world history, so we should be good there.

Critical Race Theory is an academic framework that examines how policies and laws perpetuate systemic racism in this country. That sounds like something that should be taught unless we want this nation to remain systemically racist.

The governor may as well set up a tip line to report drunk hyenas on flying Zambonis because that’s about as common as Critical Race Theory in our schools. Conservatives are now claiming any history mentioning anything black, like slavery, civil rights, or this year’s Super Bowl halftime show is Critical Race Theory. Dr. Dre is coming to indoctrinate your kids to rhyme!

The New Hampshire Department of Education also has a tip line to snitch on teachers who teach anything about systemic racism. There’s a right-wing group of Nazi moms in New Hampshire called Moms for Liberty (“The Eva Braun Appreciation Society” must have already been taken) who are offering a $500 bounty to the person who makes the first confirmed report against a teacher. So far, I don’t think anyone’s collected.

Texas’ law banning abortions includes a provision allowing any citizen to sue anyone supposedly involved in a violation of that law, whether that abortion affected them or not.

Oklahoma and Florida are both creating legislation that will allow any citizen to sue any teacher who brings Critical Race Theory into a classroom.

I think just to be safe and to be sure they don’t miss anything divisive or that threatens white privilege, these goon-run states should ban all books. Then, they can focus on teaching children the important stuff, like goose-stepping, cross-burning, and saying, “Boy, are you lost?”

Activists are now flooding Virginia’s tipline with “tips.” What they’re trying to do is make a mockery of it by reporting fake tips.

This is an outrage and you should not participate in this sort of bedlam and rabble-rousing by sending an email to helpeducation@governor.virginia.gov.

There is also a website where you can send auto-generated emails to the tip line, which you should definitely not click this link to. I won’t stand for it.

In the future, we should expect tip lines for stuff like people saying “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas” and for offensive Starbucks cups. White people are already calling 911 when they see black people in a public park grilling or dog walking. Now, if you see anyone in a public park grilling a dog, yeah sure. Call 911. But stop calling the cops because you saw a black person in a park or walking with Skittles while wearing a hoodie.

Call Glenn Youngkin.

Music Note: Today’s tooning tunes included Incubus, Infant Sorrow, Gorillaz, and Goo Goo Dolls. This cartoon took a while to complete.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Trumpkin For Governor


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Glenn Youngkin is a businessman running for governor of Virginia as a moderate and rational Republican, which doesn’t exist anymore. But the thing is, he didn’t just run as an extremist in the primary. He ran as a MAGA Kool-Aid-swilling Trump cultist. And he wasn’t even the the biggest Trumper among the GOP candidates. There were two others worse than him. One female candidate described herself as “Trump in heels” which will now become my new favorite nightmare.

Fortunately for Youngkin, Republican voters don’t select their nominee. The people who scream about election integrity don’t even have one. The party selects the nominee at a state convention and the party knew that nominating a full-on cultist that’s been dipped in orange Trumper batter like a fairground corndog wouldn’t sell in Virginia, which went for President Biden by ten points last year. Over the past decade, Virginia has gotten bluer and bluer. A Republican presidential candidate has not won Virginia since 2004.

Today, every statewide elected office is held by a Democrat, even the ones who wore black face or assaulted women (Republicans are still worse). The House of Delegates is now controlled by the Democratic Party. Much of this is thanks to Donald Trump. Historically, presidents are unpopular in their first year. By the time the Virginia race rolls around in the next year, voters go for the person in the opposite party. But that didn’t happen the year after Putin put Trump in the White House. In fact, Democratic votes increased. But, Virginia may not be entirely blue just yet. It’s a tight race separated by three points in the polls (for McAuliffe) and Youngkin has a chance. His chances depend on the memories of Virginia voters. He’s hoping they don’t have any.

Candidates often speak to the extreme of their party during the primaries and pivot to the middle during the general election. They hope independent and moderates didn’t listen to them during the primaries and hope the extremist don’t during the general campaign. Youngkin is hoping Virginia voters don’t know he spoke for the lunatic fundamentalist zealot cultists during the primary.

During the primary to choose which maniac the GOP would select to face off against former governor Terry McAuliffe, Youngkin promised to “protect the life of every Virginia child, born and unborn.” Now, he’s scrubbed all that shit from his website while his super PAC continues to shower anti-choice extremists with cash.

Youngkin was caught on a hot mic explaining to supporters he can’t champion an anti-choice platform as it won’t sell in Virginia. He’s hoping to trick moderates to win the election and then the next morning go all, “Bleah bleah bleah, you voted for Greg Abbot Lite. BWAHAHAHAHA!”

Youngkin is hoping moderate voters are what Trump believes people who died fighting for their country are, “suckers.”

He was asked if he would defund Planned Parenthood and “take it to the abortionists.” His answer was, “”I’m going to be really honest with you. The short answer is in this campaign, I can’t. When I’m governor and I have a majority in the House we can start going on offense. But as a campaign topic, sadly, that in fact won’t win my independent votes that I have to get.”

In another video, he said, “We’re going after those middle one million voters who are, sadly, gonna decide this — have decided elections for the last 10 to 12 years in Virginia, and they’ve moved a bit away from us. We’re going to get them. We just got back a whole bunch of data today, and we’re winning this group. This is the group that we have to go get.”

He’ll get them by tricking them. Don’t let him fool you.

If he’s going to lie to you about his position on abortion, what else is he lying about? Is he lying about gun control, the vaccine, the pandemic, who won the election? Yes, yes, yes, and yes.

Anti-abortion zealots aren’t worried about his hot-mic snafu or lack of campaigning on ending abortion. They listened to him during the GOP’s fake primary. “He’s not being squishy because we already have him on record saying this stuff,” Don Blake, president of the Virginia Christian Alliance, told The Washington Post.

He’s assured evangelical voters he would “oppose laws that allow women to seek abortions,” according to the Richmond Times-Dispatch. That means he’s going to oppose laws that are on the books now. Don’t mess up by voting for this guy and then wonder later why Virginia has a bunch of Texas Taliban-style laws the majority of the population opposes.

He now says he’s “pro-life,” but he’s not an extremist fundamentalist like the yee-haw fuckers in Texas. He says he’s for banning abortions after the 20th week of pregnancy, not the sixth. But, has anyone asked him if he’ll veto a bill that is a duplicate of Texas’ that bans abortion after six weeks and basically outlaws abortion? Would he veto or sign a bill that creates bounties on abortion providers? Will he restore Jefferson Davis’ name to state highways? Will he return Robet E. Lee’s statue to Richmond? Will he make Trump’s birthday a state holiday? Will you soon fly into Richmond at Ivanka International Airport? Will he rename Virginia Beach to Proud Boy Beach? Will the state motto go from “Virginia is for lovers” to “Virginia is for lovers but only for conception?” Or, “Virginia is for lovers, even rapists who impregnate you?” Since his campaign website doesn’t have a page explaining where he stands on the issues, someone needs to ask him these questions.

Don’t forget, Ted Cruz campaigned with Youngkin during the primary. Where is Ted Cruz during the general election. For most people, never is when they want to be seen with Cancun Cruz, but for Youngkin, he found a time and place.

During the primary, he would not say Biden won the election and kept talking about “election integrity,” which isn’t a real thing for Republicans but a phrase they love to say. After the primary, he needed to focus on the general election and stop staying crazy shit. When asked if Biden is president, he said, “Of course! He’s our president. He slept in the White House last night. He’s addressed a Joint Session of Congress. He’s signing executive orders that I wish he wasn’t signing. So, let’s look forward and just recognize that what we have to do is lead.”

Still, did you notice what he did not say? He still didn’t say Biden won the election. Hey, reporters. Don’t ask him who is the president. Don’t ask him who’s sleeping in the White House. Ask him if Biden won the election. Ask him if it was stolen from Trump. Ask him about George Soros, Hugo Chavez, illegal voters, and Italian satellites. Ask him, ask him, ask him. Ask him if he wants to be endorsed by Ted Cruz, Marjorie Taylor Green, and Matt Gaetz. Tie him to the conspiracy-spreading zealots.

Ask him about Donald Trump’s endorsement. Virginia, do you want a guy endorsed by Trump?

During last night’s debate, Youngkin came out against vaccine mandates for teachers and health officials. He’s against corporations mandating their employees taking the vaccine. When asked by moderator Chuck Todd whether vaccinations for measles, mumps and rubella should be voluntary, Youngkin said, “I think the data associated with those vaccines is something we should absolutely understand the difference between this vaccine.” That’s word salad, not an answer.

Chuck asked him for a real answer and Youngkin said, “Those vaccines can be mandatory. I do believe the covid vaccine is one everyone should get but we shouldn’t mandate it.” Did that make sense to you?

We do know this: States with Republican governors are doing far worse with the pandemic. They’re also the worst for economic development and have the highest poverty rates. Youngkin is promising to slash taxes, even the 2.5 percent on groceries. What he’s really promising isn’t a cut to your grocery bill, but tax cuts for billionaires like himself. Youngkin will destroy Virginia’s economy and make it a haven for the coronavirus, much like Texas and Florida have become. I don’t want Virginia to be like Texas and Florida in any sort of way. I even root for the Washington Football Team over the Cowboys and Buccaneers.

Last night’s debate was the second and the last before the election in October. There was one other scheduled but Youngkin refused to participate because Judy Woodruff, the moderator, had contributed $250 to the Clinton Foundation’s earthquake relief efforts in Haiti over a decade ago. He was worried that someone with empathy for other people couldn’t be impartial to a Republican. He was also worried she might ask questions during the debate. Maybe like Trump, he’s afraid of women, especially smart ones. So, he went with Chuck Todd.

Youngkin opposed Biden’s coronavirus relief package. He’s also against an increase in the minimum wage to $15 from the current $7.25 in Virginia. He opposes paid family and medical leave. He opposes the state’s Medicaid expansion. He’s argued for increasing gun rights. And finally, he will ban abortions. His mouth doesn’t say it, but his pocketbook does. He’s been doling out campaign contributions to anti-choice zealots in basically every race in Virginia. He’s trying to become governor with a right-wing fundamentalist anti-choice General Assembly. He’ll probably combat climate change by banning woke actions that anger God.

The Washington Post has endorsed McAuliffe. They write that Glenn Youngkin “has played footsie with the scurrilously antidemocratic Big Lie” that Trumpers claim gave Biden the presidency. The Post mentioned Youngkin would roll back gun-safety laws and abortion access, equivocated on same-sex marriage, and called Medicaid expansion, which provided health insurance for hundreds of thousands of Virginians, “sad.”

The Post also writes, “In the current campaign, for which voting starts Friday and culminates Nov. 2, Mr. McAuliffe has proposed a sweeping, detailed agenda — a sharp contrast with Mr. Youngkin, who for months had almost no policy proposals beyond a commission to tighten rules on nearly nonexistent election fraud.”

The Post points out, “The McAuliffe plan’s centerpiece is a $2 billion investment in education, which dovetails with his pro-business agenda; good schools attract good businesses.”

They also mention as governor, McAuliffe made 35 trips overseas to bring businesses and jobs to Virginia, which included luring Nestlé USA to Roslyn from California and CoStar Group to move from North Carolina to Richmond. Maybe if you live in California or North Carolina, you don’t want Terry McAuliffe to return to Virginia’s governor mansion. When McAuliffe left office, our unemployment rate was at 3.6 percent, below the national average.

McAuliffe also restored felon voting rights and criminalized gun possession by domestic abusers. Take note if you live in NoVa, McAuliffe negotiated a massive, privately financed expansion in traffic-clogged Northern Virginia’s highway capacity.

By comparison, Younkin’s only positions have been to destroy progress and create “election integrity” for non-existent voter fraud.

The Post sums up with: “It’s critical that Virginians recall that Mr. McAuliffe is a dynamic chief executive with a proven track record for advancing prosperity. Mr. Youngkin is an untested politician who would guide the state away from the moderation it has pursued, and profited from, for more than a decade. Electing him would be a grave error.” Donald Trump was an untested politician too.

Electing Youngkin would be a huge error. It would be a disaster. Trumplicans are always disasters.

Youngkin is a Trumpkin, but if you don’t want to vote for McAullife and since the will be getting hot in October, vote for a pumpkin. It’s kinda the same thing when you look at Trump.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are FIVE copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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GOP Stampede


Cjones09052021

Now that Texas has effectively banned abortion, expect other yee-haw states to follow suit sooner than later.

You might think some of these states will pause to see what the Supreme Court does in its next session, but the court already weighed in to say they’re not weighing in. Plus, Republicans are too giddy to stamp out women’s rights to wait to any longer.

One of the biggest outrages in all of this is that Republicans are winning in this nation despite the majority of the United States population disagreeing with them. Despite a majority of Americans voting against Donald Trump in 2016 and 2020, voting against Senate Republicans, and being pro-choice, conservatives will probably control the Supreme Court for the next 30 years. Did I just ruin your weekend?

Republicans are in denial that the majority of the nation wants nothing to do with them or their racist xenophobic misogynistic policies. And if they did realize that, they’d still insist on forcing the rest of the nation to live by their “values.”

The Texas law bans abortion after six weeks and encourages lawsuits against abortion providers and anyone assisting in the abortion. This includes people who may drive someone to get an abortion. Lyft has responded by creating a legal defense fund for their drivers when Texas yahoos sue them. They’re also donating $1 million to Planned Parenthood. Let’s hear it for Lyft. Thank you, Lyft.

After Lyft’s announcement, Uber commended their competitor and are now promising to pay their drivers’ legal fees when sued by Texan troglodytes. Other companies speaking out include American Airlines, Hewlett Packard, and Silicon Laboratories. Dating sites Tinder and Bumble are setting up funds to help Texas women seek abortions outside that state. In yesterday’s blog, I called for GoDaddy to take down the tattletale site where fucknuts and rednecks can report people who helped with an abortion. Before the day was over, GoDaddy took ’em down. No, not because of me but because of thousands like us telling them to do it.

I would really like to see Texas’ sports teams go after this law, including the Astros, Rockets, Texans, Cowboys, Rangers, Stars, Mavericks, and Spurs. This goes for the leagues too. C’mon, NFL, NBA, NHL, and MLB. We can include soccer too and those fake sports, NASCAR, WWE, and other wrestling companies.

What’s been overlooked by many because of the abortion bill are new laws enacted on the same day in Texas that make it harder for black people to vote and grants the right to carry a concealed gun without a permit which probably includes precincts where black people are trying to vote. I’m only surprised Texas Republicans didn’t write a new law making it legal to shoot abortion providers.

All these allies now need to target other states that intend to follower Texas. The states so far where Republicans have vowed to copy Texas’s hater law are Arkansas, Florida, South Dakota, Idaho, Indiana, and Oklahoma. Expect every Trump-voting state to make similar promises over the coming weeks.

The stampede is coming and if the courts won’t protect constitutional rights and women, then maybe businesses will. But you have to help too. Don’t buy shit made in these yee-haw states. Don’t buy Whattaburgers or beef jerky out of Texas. Don’t buy orange juice from Florida. Don’t buy Idaho potatoes. Don’t purchase a surrey with a fringe on top. Look up what a surrey is to make sure you don’t buy one. Be anti-yee-haw.

And if you live in one of these fucknut states…MOVE!!!

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are FIVE copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Treason For Tucker


Cjones07102021

When Congress investigated the September 11, 2001 attack on our nation, the investigative committee did not include any members of al Qaida. When Congress has investigated the mafia, I don’t believe any of those committees included mobsters. When the GOP held investigation after investigation into the Benghazi attack that killed four Americans, I don’t believe their committees included Islamic terrorists. But, Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi offered Republicans an opportunity to include supporters of terrorists on a committee to investigate a terrorist attack.

Make no mistake about it, the attack on January 6, 2021 was a terrorist attack. Not only are Republicans afraid to admit it was terrorists, they don’t want to admit it was an insurrection. A few of them even claim the terrorists were merely tourists. The reason being is that the terrorists were their terrorists.

The GOP made demands that had to be met before they would vote for an independent commission. They demanded equal representation on the committee and subpoena power. They could have used this to deflect from the real purpose of the investigation and shift the focus to Antifa, Black Lives Matter, why Tim Allen’s show can’t win Emmys, who put the bomp in the bomp-bah-bomp-bah-bomp, or if the NSA is investigating Tucker Carlson.

The Democrats gave Republicans everything they demanded and except for 35 members, they still voted against a commission. It ultimately failed in the Senate because of two Democratic jackasses. After voting against a commission that would have given them equal power, the Republicans complained it was partisan. Fine, let’s make it partisan.

If your partisanship is supporting terrorism, then we don’t need you. Now, the House has voted, mostly along party lines, to create a select committee to investigate the terrorist attack. This time, only two Republicans voted to investigate a terrorist attack.

There will be a 13-member panel with eight members appointed by Democrats and five appointed by Republicans. Pelosi has already given one of the Democratic seats to a Republican, Liz Cheney. Kevin McCarthy, the Republican leader, has threatened his members with punishment if they serve on the committee. He’s threatening to remove their committee assignments.

McCarthy may want to appoint a few fucknuts like Jim Jordan, Elise Stefanik, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Lauren Boebert, and Matt Gaetz to fill the committee with howler monkeys, but Pelosi can veto any of McCarthy’s choices. She should have this power because Republicans can’t be taken seriously and would use their appointments to defend terrorists. Pelosi should veto any members McCarthy chooses who voted against certifying the election. Let’s not allow terrorists to serve on the committee. The terrorist attack was motivated by the Big Lie. You can’t put members on a committee investigating the attack who continue to push the Big Lie.

Republicans are afraid of investigating the January 6 attack the same way cats are afraid of cucumbers. We don’t know why cats are afraid of cucumbers. It’s not like the cucumbers conducted a terrorist attack against the dog after coordinating with the cat, and the cat is afraid it’ll be implicated if you ask the cucumber any questions. But we do know that’s exactly why the Republicans are afraid of cucumbers, I mean, questions, committees, investigations, facts, etc. And for all we know, Donald Trump is afraid of cucumbers. They are a vegetable.

And just like cats leaping from a cucumber, Kevin McCarthy may hurt himself trying to get away from this investigation. At the very least, he’ll probably shit himself.

The people who attacked the Capitol did so to block the certification of an election and the peaceful transfer of power. They did so to destroy our democracy and install a dictator. They were supported by and received support from Republicans. There are questions as to how much support. Donald Trump tweeted for them to be at the Capitol that day. Donald Trump held a pep rally before the attack. A lot of Republicans voted against certifying the election, delaying it for the terrorists to stop the certification. Some Republicans may have been in contact with terrorists while they were in the Capitol. One Representative was tweeting locations of Democratic members. The terrorists were Trump supporters. There was a large white nationalist element to it.

Liz Cheney said her service on the committee is a matter of honoring her “oath to defend the Constitution.” McCarthy can honor his oath and select members who will also “defend the Constitution,” but that will also shine the light on the party’s culpability with the terrorists. McCarthy and Republicans are more loyal to Trump and his cult than they are to the Constitution.

The terrorists engaged in an attack to stop an act mandated by the Constitution. If McCarthy refuses to appoint anyone, he shows he doesn’t care…which he doesn’t.

McCarthy is also a witness. He was on the phone with Trump during the attack, asking him to call off his terrorists…which Trump refused to do right away.

Republicans spent years and millions of dollars investigating the terrorist attack on Benghazi. Quick! Tell me what they learned from their investigations. Now, another terrorist attack needs an investigation but they don’t want to talk about it because they’re implicated. They would probably rather investigate Tucker Carlson’s claims the National Security Agency is spying on him. Several Republicans, howler monkeys, have backed him up on this bullshit.

Tucker claimed, without any evidence, the NSA has hacked into his emails and plans to release them. This is ironic since he was a big fan of Russia hacking into the Democratic Party’s emails during the 2016 campaign. Maybe someone else has hacked into his emails and plans to release them and Tucker is just preparing us for the amount of gay porn they’ll contain. Quick! What did the release of the Democratic Party’s emails contain? Something about pizza?

In fact, you’re not going to believe this shit…Kevin McCarthy said, “There is a public report that NSA read the emails of Fox News host Tucker Carlson.” Uh, that “public report” is Tucker’s claim. Fox News’ lawyers claimed in court that nobody can believe Tucker. Someone needs to tell McCarthy he can’t believe anything Tucker claims. McCarthy also said, “I have serious questions regarding this matter that must be answered…the NSA cannot be used as a political instrument.” McCarthy has called on Devin Nunes, another howler monkey, to look into this.

Matt Gaetz, a howler monkey who does NOT want anyone to look at his emails, called for an…wait for it…an investigation. Jim Jordan, another howler, is also promoting the lie…along with all his other lies.

How can anyone justify not voting to investigate a terrorist attack on our nation while calling to investigate bullshit by Tucker Carlson? If we’re going to investigate fictional shit on TV, let’s find out why Jerry hated Newman so much.

Do you know how this Tucker claim will end up? It’ll land like all the other Tucker claims.

What happened to Tucker’s claims he had documents that would incriminate the Bidens in all sort of illegal shenanigans? What happened to Tucker’s claims he had emails proving Dr. Anthony Fauci was involved in a criminal coverup of the origins of Covid-19? Tucker was OK with spying on those emails. What happened to Tucker’s claims the FBI was behind the insurrection? Do you remember anything coming from those? You don’t because nothing did.

If there is an investigation, I’m sure it’d be dropped just as soon as Republicans discovered Tucker was partly responsible for the white nationalist terrorist attack, he’s full of crap, his emails are full of gay porn, and he’s afraid of cucumbers.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which usually go for $45.00 each, signed. Another order will be placed soon. You may pre-order if you want. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Orbiting Moons and Asteroids


Cjones06172021

Republican Louie Gohmert is a lunatic, but he’s not alone.

Gohmert recently caused a lot of people to laugh and mock him when he asked the nation’s forestry service if we can combat climate change by changing the orbits of the Earth and the Moon. His supporters are saying he was just joking and using it to make a point. No. He was not. He’s that stupid.

It’s like the time Donald Trump suggested we all inject disinfectants to fight the coronavirus. His supporters argue he never suggested we drink bleach but yet, the Trump’s White House said he was being “sarcastic.”

Louie Gohmert is no scientist. He’s not even a smart person. Like Donald Trump, he downplayed the coronavirus and eventually caught it. After he caught it, he blamed…wait for this…the wearing of face masks. He even banned people in his office from wearing face masks. He also endorsed Trump’s baseless claim of taking hydroxychloroquine to treat the virus and falsely claimed Germany had invented a mist that would kill it. Was he just kidding then?

Was Louie just kidding when he talked about “terror babies?” What are “terror babies?” It’s this theory Louie and others have that Muslim terrorists were impregnating women, sending them to the U.S. to have their babies, then they’d return home with the babies to raise them as terrorists. Later, the baby, all grown up now, would come to the U.S. as a citizen to commit terrorist attacks. Trust me on this: That’s a stupid plan. Kids never go into professions their parents want them to. Yeah, yeah, yeah…Dad wants me to bomb an embassy but what I really wanna do is busk “Smelly Cat” in Greenwich Village.

Maybe all those white nationalist MAGA goons storming the capitol were “terror babies.”

Louie also referred to Robert Mueller as an “anal opening,” pushed the debunked conspiracy theory that George Soros aided Nazis (when he was a child) to kill his fellow Jews and confiscate their property, endorsed the Big Lie that Trump won the election, endorsed Texas’ lawsuit against Pennsylvania to decertify their electoral votes for President Biden, and even sued Mike Pence to stop him from certifying the Electoral College.

Would it surprise you to learn that Gohmert attends a church called “Green Acres?” I am not making that up but I bet I got the theme of “Green Acres” stuck in your head. Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarm living is the life for me.

When Gohmert lost his lawsuit against Mike Pence, he said, “Basically, in effect, the ruling would be that you got to go to the streets and be as violent as Antifa and Black Lives Matter.” Louie later criticized the terrorist attack on the Capitol, I guess not realizing people would actually do what he encouraged them to do. Also, never mind that Antifa and BLM never attempted a bloody coup.

Later, Louie said most of the people involved in the attack were “nonviolent peaceful Americans whose only crimes were supporting Donald Trump.” Earlier this month, he attended a conference full of Qanon fuckos and claimed leftists were a part of the violent mob of terrorists and it wasn’t so bad because this country has had worse attacks, like that Green Acres theme. Doo-doo-da-doo-doo. Doo! Doo!

If you’re attacked by a shark, then later you’re attacked by a bear, are you going to dismiss the one you thought wasn’t as serious? Yeah, I got bit by a shark, but that bear was a real motherfucker. Someone should ask Louie who would win a fight between a shark and a bear. It will occupy him for hours.

At that same event, Louie posed for photos with someone who claimed he was a part of that mob attacking the capitol. I don’t remember Washington politicians posing for pictures with the Taliban…well, except Ronald Reagan.

As I said, Louie is a lunatic but he’s not alone. While he’s talking about changing the orbits of the Earth and the Moon, the orbits he should think about changing are those of his and fellow Republicans around Trump’s ass.

A majority of Republicans believe Donald Trump won the election. They are wrong. They have no evidence but just like with birtherism, it’s something they believe because they want to believe it.

House GOP leader Kevin McCarthy initially criticized Trump, then flew down to Mar-A-Lago to kiss his ass and apologize for rightly saying he was responsible for a terrorist attack. The party kicked Liz Cheney out of House leadership because she blamed Trump for the terrorist attack and refused to parrot the lie Trump won the election. Her replacement, Elaine Stefanik, assumed the orbital position around Trump’s ass and said he was the leader of the party. She then went to New Jersey for a photo with Trump.

Donald Trump lost the popular vote both times he ran for president. He lost the House and Senate for the party. He’s a drag nationally for Republican candidates but popular with the base. It’s not that Washington Republicans love Trump, but that they’re afraid of him. They voted against investigating the attack on the Capitol out of fear of angering Trump.

Washington Republicans are cowards, and many like Gohmert are idiots.

At least one of them acknowledged climate change is real, of course, while offering a nonsensical solution to it. Hey, it beats actually having to do anything to solve the problem, right? It was ridiculous and stupid to ask a forest service if they can change the orbits of the Earth and Moon. But, that may be more realistic and easier to do than getting Republicans like Gohmert to change their orbits around Donald Trump’s ass.

Republicans are all about the ass.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have two copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

Watch me draw: