Twitter’s new owner, I mean founder (sorry, Elon), tweeted last night, “Widespread verification will democratize journalism & empower the voice of the people.”
It’s really amazing this guy was successful at ever selling anything with that sort of bullshit sales pitch. Elon is selling verifications on Twitter, the blue check. That means you’re verified and a real boy or some shit like that. Famous people, corporations, news outlets, and journalists have them (not all journalists, you bastards). Previously, you were awarded a blue check when Twitter deemed you worthy. Now, you will receive a blue check after you pay Twitter/Elon $8.00 and you will keep it by paying him $8.00 every month. That’s democracy? No, it’s a money-making scheme.
I’m not opposed to capitalism on paper, but don’t sell me some bullshit and tell me it’s a club sandwich (I had a club sandwich in Washington with red onions on it and I never even considered that before. It was delicious!). What Elon is selling here is something that used to be earned, not paid for.
I’ve seen political cartoonists boast about being a Pulitzer Prize nominee. Wow. A real Pulitzer Prize nominee. That’s impressive and looks good on bios and resumes. Did I already say “wow?” Being a Pulitzer Prize nominee must mean you’re a really good political cartoonist, you badass, you. But the thing is, anybody with $75 (it used to be $50) can be a Pulitzer Prize “nominee.” You can even nominate yourself. So, when you see a political cartoonist brag about being a nominee, don’t be impressed. It’s an amateur move like pathetically tagging ten celebrities with every cartoon you draw in a desperate effort to get one of them to retweet it despite the fact they don’t have anything to do with the subject in the cartoon. If you see someone brag about being a Pulitzer Prize FINALIST, then yeah. Be impressed. You can also be impressed if they’re Herblock Prize finalists.
But my point is, how “authentic” are you if you paid for it? I shouldn’t have to pay to be recognized as authentic. If I pay the $8.00 a month, that means I’m as authentic as Anderson Cooper in Elon’s eyes. I would rather earn it. Elon shouldn’t be charging for the blue checks. Twitter should stick to granting it to accounts that should have it. It serves the account and the Twitter audience.
A blue check would serve my readers because then they’d know the cartoons I tweet out are the official versions, and not from a goosestepping jackass tweeting out my cartoon after he manipulated the caption to support his bullshit propaganda. Yes, that happens. It happened to me recently on Reddit and despite my complaint, Reddit said it was “free speech” and in the “public domain” for that lying sack of shit motherfucker to impersonate me. But I’m not bitter.
But Elon doesn’t like being impersonated. He banned comedian Kathy Griffin for impersonating him claiming she violated a rule by not making it clear her account was a parody. Yeah, right. After buying Twitter, Elon tweeted “comedy is now legal on Twitter,” then he banned Sarah Silverman for changing her account name and bio pic to his and tweeted, “I am a freedom of speech absolutist and I eat doody for breakfast every day.”
Elon said accounts that impersonate will be permanently suspended without warning, which brings us back to Twitter Blue, which is supposed to be for public figures. Now for $8.00, it will be much easier to impersonate a public figure. If I change my name to Elon Musk, use his photo, and have a blue check that I paid $8.00 for, then why shouldn’t anyone believe I’m Elon Musk, other than the fact I don’t eat doody for breakfast every day?
Elon doesn’t care about democratizing journalism or the “voice of the people” any more than he cares about facts and free speech.
Elon tweeted yesterday, “Twitter needs to become by far the most accurate source of information about the world. That’s our mission.” I find that disingenuous from the guy who tweeted a conspiracy theory about Nancy Pelosi’s husband and her attacker.
You’re full of shit, Elon, but maybe that’s because you eat doody every day.
Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.
Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.
Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to firstname.lastname@example.org. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.
Watch me draw:
Free Kathy Griffin
I’m still on Twitter with no ‘blue’ check. I will not be paying a multi-trillion-dollar asshole for the privilege.
Cow shit for breakfast. Bull shit for lunch. Pig shit for supper. And chickenshit all day long!
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Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
#FOSElon … “You’re full of shit, Elon, but maybe that’s because you eat doody every day.”