Liz v. Lettuce


I didn’t know what I was going to draw this morning and sat at my drawing table with my iPad open while I considered my options. I had already created and dated the canvas I was going to draw on in Procreate, but I just didn’t have the idea yet. I considered using an idea I wrote last week for CNN, which I really like, but thought maybe a few other issues should take precedence, like the war in Ukraine. Of course, my TV was on during this.

My TV was on mute and saw a live feed of a podium sitting outside 10 downing street with “Breaking News: Liz Truss to address nation,” or something like that. I thought to myself, “What does she have to say?” I turned my head from the TV to look at the empty canvas again because that always works to inspire an idea (sarcasm), and when I looked back, a new breaking news headline was on the TV. LIZ TRUSS RESIGNS.

United Kingdom Prime Minister Liz Truss gave her resignation speech and I missed it. How long was I staring at that blank canvas? Not long. I blinked and I missed it.

Liz Truss was PM for 45 days. She was elected by the Conservative Party, not the voters of the UK. It’s kinda like here in the USA with the Supreme Court. One party picks a horrible fundamentalist fucknut zealot who the majority of the nation truly despises to sit on the highest court in the land for the rest of his or her life. At least the UK can shitcan their PM. We are stuck with SCOTUS judges for 30 years or so.

During her time as PM, she oversaw the tanking of the UK economy and made moves that derailed the nation’s stock market. She was a total disaster. Even the Queen died during her term. I know Liz Truss didn’t kill the Queen, but Elizabeth II waited 96 years for Liz Truss to take over before she died.

In the speech that I barely missed, Truss said she could “no longer deliver the mandate” upon which she had set out her stall, and spoke to King Charles III before resigning.

What mandate? The Conservative Party mandate? She won the slimmest majority from her own party to win the leadership position, which represents just 0.4 percent of the 47 million eligible UK voters. One problem with conservatives, in the UK and USA, is that they think 0.4 percent is a mandate. This is some real Mitch McConnell shit here.

Right now, a head of lettuce would probably win a larger “mandate” than Liz Truss.

The Daily Star, a right-leaning UK tabloid, bought a head of lettuce. With an average lifespan of ten days, the lettuce was placed against Liz Truss on the Star’s front page on October 14 in a competition to see which would last longer. It’s been six days. The lettuce won. In fact, the lettuce still has about four days left. You can still make a BLT with it which is more useful and purposeful than Liz Truss’s tenure as UK Prime Minister. Maybe we should throw some croutons at Truss and see what she can do with them. Personally, I find croutons useless, so they’d be perfect with Liz Truss.

Liz Truss will be replaced once again by the Tories in about a week. Just 45 days ago, they thought Liz Truss was their best option. Looking at who they have to pick from in the Conservative Party, the United Kingdom might be better if they go with the head of lettuce.

Oh, hey. Can we replace Brett Kavanaugh, Neil Gorsuch, Clarence Thomas, Samuel Alito, and Amy Coney Barrett with heads of lettuce? Lettuce is less zealotry.

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6 comments

  1. I woke this morning with my wife telling me the head of lettuce won in the UK. Liz has resigned. Still groggy and waking up, struggling to get a cup of coffee I turned on my computer and checked my e-mail where I found a claytoonz e-mail … liz-v-lettuce. Wow. Putin is trying to start WWIII and both the brexit UK and civil war American south are trying to destroy democracy. I am going back to bed.

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  2. Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    FACT … “Liz Truss was PM for 45 days. She was elected by the Conservative Party, not the voters of the UK. It’s kinda like here in the USA with the Supreme Court. One party picks a horrible fundamentalist fucknut zealot who the majority of the nation truly despises to sit on the highest court in the land for the rest of his or her life. At least the UK can shitcan their PM. We are stuck with SCOTUS judges for 30 years or so.”

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  3. Albertans, especially me, can only hope Premier Danielle Smith suffers the same fate as Ms Truss did. She has no mandate from the people of Alberta either, and she only represents about 1 in 5 Albertans with her crazy conspiracy-theory politics. In less than 10 days she has upset people all over the world, making them think Alberta is more redneck tham Florida or Texas. We need her gone. NOW! Before she can do any real damage to our province, or to our nation!
    I know you don’t care much about what happens in Canada, Clay, but I think Ms Smith (sic) would give you enough fodder for a fantastic cartoon — even one for each day since she was appointed to her office (sick!).

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  4. Reblogged this on Filosofa's Word and commented:
    I am exhausted for the moment with talking about the upcoming midterm elections, the horrific Republican lies and conspiracies, and just the whole shebang of U.S. politics. Turns out, the UK isn’t faring much better and yesterday, Prime Minister Liz Truss resigned her position after only 45 days in office. So, let’s set aside our own troubles for a little bit and see what Clay Jones of Claytoonz has to say about Ms. Truss and the state of politics in the UK today!

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  5. As there are Conservatives who seriously want the insufferable Johnson back, and leader of our UK (The Uncomfortable Kingdom) is being voted in by smaller and smaller segments of the population, it is time we had some dignity and stability back. Small steps though. To start off I am suggesting a new National Anthem for our Unhappy Kingdom

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