Haz Mor Corupshun

EPA Director Scott Pruitt’s defense that he used his position to unethically seek a Chick-fil-A franchise for his wife was that he really likes fried chicken. That’s like defending yourself of taking kickbacks by saying you really like money.

On Thursday at an event at FEMA HQ, Donald Trump said to Pruitt, “EPA is doing really, really well. Somebody has to say that about you a little bit, you know that, Scott.” Yeah. Somebody has to say it because nobody else is saying it.

Over 100 lawmakers, including Republicans, have called for Pruitt to resign or be fired. Chief of Staff John Kelly, who has defended a wife beater on his staff, has lobbied for Trump to fire Oklahoma Scottie. The restaurant in the White House basement in the West Wing has requested for Pruitt to stop eating there so much. One of his top aides, Millan Hupp, has resigned with reports saying she was tired of being “thrown under the bus.”

Pruitt may be the most corrupt member of Trump’s administration, which is a hefty accomplishment among shitweasels. He attempted to give Hupp a raise of over 50% and involved her in all sorts of schemes, from buying a used nasty mattress from the Washington Trump Hotel to goad Chick-fil-A into giving his wife a franchise. After hearing the rumors of what Trump had Russian prostitutes do to a mattress, that’s the last thing I’d want from a Trump hotel.

There are currently more than a dozen investigations into Pruitt’s scandals. So many in fact, that Republicans are trying to decrease funding for the watchdog agency tasked with the investigations. With that many investigations, a lot of people wonder why Pruitt still has his job. I’m wondering why he’s not in jail.

It’s a long list of scandals for Pruitt. They include him getting a cheapo rate for boarding at a lobbyist’s condo, excessive travel expenses and security, spending around $1,500 on fancy pens, attempting to spend mega bucks on a portrait of himself, buying a soundproof booth, buying expensive doors for his office, wanting his security to use their flashy lights and sirens so they can run red lights and get him to get him to French restaurants quicker, and the pay raises, Trump’s mattress, and now Chick-fil-A.

Let’s hope for Scottie that the investigations are also closed on Sundays.

Watch me draw.

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