Rahma Lama Ding Dong


A few years ago I was debating a friend who is a conservative. Really. I have a friend who is conservative. He’s a really good friend too and I don’t consider him a jerk at all. I think he’s wrong on everything and the feelings are mutual, but none of that’s a reason for me to overlook he’s an awesome guy. During our friendly argument I bashed some Republicans for exhibiting modern Republican behavior, which is just terrible stuff. He pointed out that the Democrats have Rahm Emanuel. It was a really good counter point.


Republicans don’t have Jack Kemps anymore. They have Ted Cruz. And yes, when you say “Ted Cruz” you can let that ooze sound linger at the end of his name.

Ted Cruz might be the worst person sliming through politics right now and Republicans are owning him. Though there are some who really can’t stand the guy.

Ted Cruz’s college freshman roommate, Craig Mazin said “I would rather have anybody else be the president of the United States. Anyone. I would rather pick somebody from the phone book.” He really doesn’t like Ted Cruz. He later said “I want to be clear because Ted Cruz is a nightmare of a human being. I have plenty of problems with his politics but truthfully his personality is so awful that 99 percent of why I hate him is just his personality. If he agreed with me on every issue, I would have him only one percent less.

One colleague who worked with Cruz on the Bush 200 campaign said “Why do people take such an instant dislike to Ted Cruz? It just saves time.”

George W. Bush, his former boss who refused to give him a White House job said “I just don’t like the guy.”

His senate colleagues can’t stand him. One thing that hurts is the life-size oil painting Cruz keeps of himself. That’s creepy.

On top of all that you probably can’t name one thing he’s done for Texas since becoming a Senator.

Craig Mazin, who had to field complaints about his roommate creeping the womens’ halls in his bathrobe, sums it up best with “One thing Ted Cruz is really good at: uniting people who otherwise disagree about everything else in a total hatred of Ted Cruz.”

Ted Cruz is the guy who told a 3-year-old girl that her “world was on fire” at a campaign event.

Ted Cruz is that guy, that when you see him approaching, you just go “ew.”

After Ted Cruz you have charmers of the like of Mike Huckabee, Carly Fiorina, of course we can’t forget Donald Trump.

Rahm Emanuel is the Democrat who Democrats don’t want to own.

Rahm is a huge disaster. His appointment as Obama’s chief of staff is probably the president’s worst political decision. I’m sure Obama was happy for Rahm to run for mayor of Chicago as it got him out of D.C. While as chief of staff, Rahm would confront congressmen in the showers. Yes. Confronted by a buck-ass naked Ramn Emanuel. That’s possibly creepier than Ted Cruz skulking dormitories in a towel.

Rahm is more of a political manager, like Karl Rove, than a leader which doesn’t work for the position of mayor, especially in a major city.

Rahm fought against a Freedom of Information Act requests by The Chicago Tribune, claiming it was a burden. He then deleted the emails they wanted. Rahm either doesn’t get that being sleazy is very apparent in a city like Chicago, or he thinks he has to be sleazy to be mayor of Chicago.

Emanuel is accused of allowing the police to get away with using excessive force on African Americans. In the Laquan McDonald shooting , his administration withheld the dashboard camera video of the shooting for 18 months, possibly to help with his reelection. The city paid the family $5 million dollars before there was even a lawsuit, which many consider an effort to keep them quiet during a reelection campaign. The city also resisted charging the cop for over 18 months. The video was only released because a judge ordered it.

What happens when there’s a cover up? Heads roll. In this case the head belonged to the chief of police. I don’t think it’s a coincidence this occurs while there are calls for the mayor to resign.

So I guess it works like this: For every 100 disgusting Republicans, there’s one disgusting Democrat.




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