The Truth Is Staying Out There


cjones12222017

The Pentagon is getting their UFO on.

From the day Donald Trump came into office, I’ve told people our government has never encountered nor has proof aliens from another world has ever visited ours. If there were top government secrets about it Trump would have told us by now…or at least Vladimir Putin. A buddy of mine told me that’s not proof because maybe smarter heads at the Pentagon wouldn’t tell Trump. That makes sense too. I’m sure there’s some government secrets not told to presidents. And, if there was ever a president you don’t want to give classified information to then that president is big orange dumbass Tweeterdore.

As it turns out, maybe aliens don’t exist but that hasn’t stopped the Pentagon from having a secret program investigating UFOs.

It was initiated by then Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, from Nevada, in 2007. The military had announced way back in 1969 that UFOs were not worth studying, but that didn’t stop them from spending $22 million on a program. Then again, the Pentagon has been known to spend thousands on hammers and toilet seats.

The Department of Defense even released a video of a Navy Super Hornet encountering an unknown object that has been described as “defying physics.”

The department says they ended the program in 2012 but there are reports it’s still in operation. So, a secret program that doesn’t exist anymore but if it does, it’s a secret once again.

I also told my friend that if there are aliens out there, then I hope they don’t land while Trump is president. Seriously, that’ll just make them turn around and go home or worse, give us the Alderan treatment to put us out of our misery.

If they do land and insist upon meeting our leader, and we can’t find Angela Merkel or Justin Trudeau, then let’s take them to that animatronic Trump Disney just released. It is disturbing looking and probably scares children and small animals, but it resembles Jon Voight more than Donald Trump and it speaks in somewhat complete sentences without lying or its teeth falling out.

And, if Mueller can’t save us then maybe the aliens will take us with them.

For the record, I think it’s egocentric to believe we’re the only life in the universe but I don’t believe we’ve ever been visited. I also do not believe in the Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, yetis, leprechauns, vampires, smurfs, fraggles, Santa Claus, God, chupacabras, or quality barbecue on the East coast. But then again, a little over a year ago I didn’t believe my fellow Americans would put an orange, racist, infantile, narcissistic dumbass in the White House.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print (please specify which print you want or I won’t mail one). All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

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2 comments

  1. Also, I forgot that most scientists say that what we see are only robot flying machines sent out by very advanced civilizations. A civilization millions of years ahead of the human race. So there’s nothing inside those UFOs we see.

    Liked by 1 person

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