Fun With Giraffes


I was going to take today off but I figured if April could squeeze out a tiny giraffe then I can squeeze out another cartoon. I still plan to kinda chill tonight, watch a movie, and attempt to sleep sort of like a normal person. In a bed and not upside down from a tree branch.

That giraffe finally gave birth. The zoo in Podunk, New York were expecting the baby to be born between mid-January and mid-February, but April waited for April. She still has time to finish her taxes. And if you had Trump releasing his taxes before April delivering a new giraffe, pay up.

April became an internet sensation as people logged in to see her give birth but only saw a live stream of what appeared to be a bored giraffe. Hey, she’s on the left side of the pen. Now she’s on the right side of the pen. It seems giraffes, when they’re not hooking up with other giraffes to make tiny giraffes, don’t do much more than pace. Eventually views decreased. Who knew being a giraffe could be so boring? It was like watching Lords Of The Rings.

April’s baby is here and it’s already walking. My great-nephew (great as in my brother’s daughter’s baby) is over a year old and just now figured out walking. Of course he didn’t have the advantage of cooking for 15 months, which I’m sure my niece is thankful for. She won’t see this post. No one in my family reads my work.

April’s baby daddy, Oliver, who is also a giraffe, will not be involved in the care and raising of his baby. That’s really not the slacking off of responsibility one would expect from an Oliver. I’d expect an Oliver to be buying savings bonds, being at every soccer game, and yelling to the little giraffe to turn the music down and with Oliver Jr. screaming back  “you don’t understand me!” and somewhere 28 years later someone’s playing “giraffes in the cradle. But no. All male giraffes wanna do is fight and make more giraffes. If there’s a program to study that I’m sure Trump’s cutting the funding.

That’s all the smart-assness you’re getting out of me until Monday morning. I’m now four days ahead with my cartoons. Crazy! Now if any of you want to recommend what movie I watch tonight, I’m all ears. First to suggest “LOTR” is cut off!

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  1. Don’t know your movie preferences, but if you want to see great actors tearing each other up with a witty, snarky script, try The Lion in Winter. If you want classics, Casablanca or To Have and Have Not. If you want a taste of the best sci-fi series ever on television, try Babylon 5: In the Beginning. If you just want crazy funny, Young Frankenstein.


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