Beep-Beep, Beep-Beep, Yeah

I love the new MAGAt talking point that President Biden will be on drugs during the debate. Donald Trump has even claimed he’ll be on cocaine. As soon as Trump said this bullshit without any proof, MAGA World picked it up and ran with it. Even Donald Trump Jr accused Biden of being on cocaine which is like Donald Trump Jr accusing anyone of being on cocaine. But the MAGAts got their talking points. Take political cartoonist Mike Beckom for example.

I hate to use Beckom as an example because he’s not a good cartoonist and the only thing that makes him a professional is that he’s actually paid for his “work.” He lacks sophistication and the ability to comprehend in order to do this job. Like other conservative cartoonists, he has to ignore reality, which is probably for the best since Beckom isn’t smart enough to understand the issues he’s covering, which is probably why he only illustrates Trump’s talking points. You don’t need analytical skills to repeat a Trump talking point. I tried to talk to Beckom years ago when he begged and hounded me to syndicate him, but I found it to be impossible.

Beckom’s cartoon isn’t satire or punditry since it’s based on a lie. We have room for creative license and we put words in people’s mouths, but a political cartoonist’s work should be based on facts. No news outlet should run any cartoons that are based on lies. But if news outlets followed that rule, cartoonists like Chip Bok (who doesn’t know the difference between “where” and “were”), Steve Kelley, Gary Varvel, Bob Gorrell, Tom Stiglich, Gary McCoy, Rivers (the “anonymous” cartoonist), Branco, Al Goodwyn, and Mike Beckom would never have their work published.

But the part I love about this talking point is that it exposes Republican’s fear of Joe Biden. After the last State of the Union, where the president was prepared for his hecklers and howler monkeys and destroyed them, Republicans claimed he must have been on drugs. Like most conservative political cartoonists, Republicans weren’t smart enough to realize they had admitted that Joe Biden kicked their asses. Now, they’re exposing they expect him to do well in Thursday night’s debate. Also, you don’t need to take drugs to beat a Republican in an argument. Just use truth.

I’ve never taken cocaine in my life. God’s truth, I’ve never done any illegal drug. Not because I’m a Boy Scout but because they terrify me. But I’ve been around and I know that cocaine can keep you going, but it won’t help a person during a presidential debate. Cocaine may help you be creative, but not argue with logic. Plus, you don’t want to go into a debate “prepared” like Ace Frehley. If a person snorted a line before entering a debate, that person would probably sound like Donald Trump and be shouting about electric boats and sharks or some other asinine incomprehensible nonsense.

Republicans are creating excuses for why President Biden will beat Trump this Thursday instead of creating explanations as to why Donald Trump will come off as a raving lunatic who should be wearing a jacket that ties in the back.

Republicans are also making a lot of noise about President Biden using a week to prepare for this debate. They’re mocking him for using a week, which has been done before. What they’re really worried about is that Trump can’t prepare because he doesn’t have the attention span. Back when Trump received daily intelligence reports, the preparers of those briefings had to include pictures of him to keep his attention. I always found some solace that he wasn’t paying attention.

Republicans need to make up an excuse for why President Biden knows every intricate detail of policies and legislation while Donald Trump believes in Revolutionary War airports, noise from windmills causes cancer, raking prevents forest fires, and batteries sink boats. Hell, Trump believes people can’t tell it’s an unnatural color on his face and his bleached aardvark combover is fooling people.

Here’s the best part of all this: Over the past four years, the Republican talking point has been that President Biden has severe cognitive issues. They’ve been hammering for four years that he’s not in control of his own administration and he has handlers. Last week, Trump switched it up and said President Biden is a “worthy debater.”

Trump said this because he’s going to lose and he can’t lose to someone with severe cognitive issues (This may spare us from more cheap fake videos for the next few days). This is like before the 2020 election. He knew he was going to lose so he claimed beforehand that it would be corrupt. It’s also why he’s doing it before this election.

But no matter how many times President Biden says “folks,” or tells a story about his father, or how many times he whispers to make his point, or even if he fumbles every question, it won’t change the fact that Donald Trump was recently found guilty in a court of law and still has three criminal trials facing him. It won’t change the fact that another court found Trump to be a rapist. It won’t change the fact that another court issued a fine of hundreds of millions of dollars because he’s a grifter. It won’t change the fact that Trump is a national security threat. It won’t change the fact that Donald Trump is a felon.

My cartoon for CNN looked forward to 2028 but the fact is, if Trump is elected or reinstalled into the White House by Putin or Trump-appointed judges, there may not be a 2028.

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