Notes Between Dictators

The dictators of Russia and North Korea got together last week and had themselves a little dictator summit. What we got out of the summit was bullshit typical of fascists. The only thing missing was Donald Trump.

What may be most unique about this summit is that it was in Pyongyang, the capital of North Korea. Vladimir Putin went one step further than Trump to legitimate Kim Jong-Un. A few months ago, Kim traveled to Russia to meet with Vlad. Naturally, all the information we’re getting out of this summit is state propaganda from two dictatorships. To understand this, imagine if all the information we received was from Fox News.

The last summit was held because Putin is desperate for weapons to fight his war and illegal invasion of Ukraine. Russia asking North Korea for help with weapons is like Donald Trump needing a bond to secure an appeal for grifting the state of New York…or Jeffrey Epstein for a condom.

During the Pyongyang Summit, The dictators signed a treaty pledging to defend each other and offering military assistance in case of an attack. But Russia is the nation that invaded Ukraine and nobody is about to invade North Korea. Nations with nuclear weapons don’t get invaded. We had nearly seven decades to invade North Korea before it got nukes and we didn’t do it.

Putin also threatened to give weapons to North Korea if the West continued to arm Ukraine. Since Putin was groveling for conventional weapons from the DPRK, what weapons will he offer? I think he’s talking about nuclear weapons and perhaps the technology for Kim to fire them at his enemies. Rockets are usually more effective than a burro.

Putin’s threat is kind of an insult to Kim as Putin is warning the West, “If you keep it up, I’m giving nukes to this lunatic.” But, we can’t allow a terrorist like Putin to control us with threats.

Putin’s threat also shows he doesn’t believe Trump will win the presidential election. If he did, all he would have to do is wait for him to enter office as he will immediately stop arming Ukraine. The reason Putin invaded Ukraine in the first place was to prevent it from becoming a part of NATO. A president (sic) Trump would never allow Ukraine to join NATO. A nation needs unanimous approval from every member of NATO to join. Every member has a veto and Trump would use ours to deny Ukraine membership. Trump wouldn’t just disallow Ukraine’s membership, he may even revoke ours.

Putin and Kim are dictators who murder their opposition. Putin prefers the methods of poisoning, people occasionally walking into stray bullets in Red Square, and people accidentally tripping and falling out of windows in high-rise buildings. Kim likes to murder people with anti-aircraft guns and be torn apart by dogs after being stripped naked (the victims, not the dogs. Dogs are already naked). Four years ago, Kim ordered citizens to turn over their dogs to be used as food. Maybe Kim is afraid of dogs now like Trump is afraid of sharks.

Both dictators use the tactic of kidnapping Americans for ransom. Other things they have in common are not giving up power, photo-ops that make them look manly, preferring nuclear weapons over the well-being of their people, both having a cult following, being smoochy with Donald Trump, and they’re both 5 feet and seven inches tall. I looked that last one up after seeing the propaganda photos of them standing next to each other.

I think Putin should force the Kontinental Hockey League to place a team in Pyongyang, and if the Pyongyang Dear Leaders play like the Washington Capitals did last year, the players can be fed to dogs.

Trump has promised revenge on his enemies and to use the Justice Department to go after them. He probably wishes he was at this summit of fascists to take notes.

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