Russia

Putin Play


Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday

I already wrote a blog on this subject, so if you want another, I suggest your click the link above to my editor’s column in the newsletter.

But in case you’re wondering, yes. When I draw a cartoon like this, I stare at my canvas wondering what other classic toys I can/should add. It starts with Mr. Potato Head, Gumby, and Slinky Dog but after that, I start struggling. I don’t know how the rest comes to me. It just does. There is a lot of googling for images after I’ve decided on one. I have a lot of windows open when drawing a cartoon like this. I have to keep the window for each toy open until after it’s colored.

I did a cartoon similar to this about five years ago but I didn’t want to repeat myself, so most of the toys are different except for the first three I mentioned. This was fun to draw and when I sent it to my editor, I had my fingers crossed he’d pick it.

When he called me, he referred to this one as the Mr. Potato Head idea because there wasn’t a lot of other stuff in the rough. He said let’s go with this one, but that he also liked another. I was like, “no, no, no….Mr. Potato Head. We gotta do Mr. Potato Head. Please!!!!!” I’m glad we did.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Milk and Cookies for the PutinBunker


A reader sent me a cartoon idea this morning and it wasn’t bad. Thomas, a nice guy it seems, suggested I draw a cartoon of Edward Snowden being drafted by the Russian military now that President Vladimir Putin has granted him Russian citizenship. Not bad, Thomas. Of course, I’m not going to draw Thomas’ idea because I don’t use ideas that are not my own and…I predict at least two other cartoonists will draw it. In fact, my friend Quannah commented on this cartoon on Facebook predicting Snowden will be drafted.

Thomas was thinking like a political cartoonist, seeing Putin’s desperation as he’s losing the illegal war he started in Ukraine. Putin lied to justify his war but even if Nazis were running wild in Ukraine, that wouldn’t justify bombing schools and hospitals. It also doesn’t justify the sham vote occurring in Russian-occupied territories to become a part of Russia. I’m sure after all the results come in showing they do want to leave Ukraine and join Russia, Donald Trump will call and congratulate them.

Putin is desperate and has ordered a draft he claims is only a “partial mobilization.” In a national address, he said, “We are talking about partial mobilization. In other words, only military reservists, primarily those who served in the armed forces and have specific military occupational specialties and corresponding experience, will be called up.” Unfortunately for Russians, that’s a lie. Putin is a liar.

Russians are fleeing the nation to avoid the draft. They’re crossing borders into Finland, Georgia, Mongolia, and Kazakhstan, and flying to Turkey.

One young man who has been drafted is fleeing Russia despite the fact his wife will give birth next week. He said, “I will miss the most important day of my life. But I am simply not letting Putin turn me into a killer in a war that I want no part in.”

One group that helps Russians leave the nation so they won’t have to fight Putin’s war estimates that over 70,000 men have used their service to leave Russia with many purchasing one-way tickets. Returning to Russia may land them in prison…or dead in Ukraine.

Russians are against this war and the “partial” mobilization. One young man shot a recruitment officer today at a military enlistment station in Russia’s Irkutsk region. He was distraught because his best friend has been drafted to fight in Putin’s war despite having zero military experience. See? Putin is a liar. The recruitment officer survived.

With so many Russians against this war against a nation they don’t hate, how can they stop it? The only way may be by removing Putin from office. That will not happen politically. Russian politicians lack the intestinal fortitude to confront Putin. They’re unwilling to speak against him let alone attempt to remove him. Putin’s critics have bad habits of tripping out of windows and accidentally drinking poison.

The only way Putin will be removed will be by a military coup. The more territory Russia loses to Ukraine, the more the military destabilizes, and the more Russian soldiers die fighting Putin’s war, the more the military will want to get rid of Putin.

Putin, like Hitler before him who also wasn’t a military genius, may find himself in a bunker.

As Soviet troops entered a destroyed Berlin in 1945, Hitler hid in his Führerbunker and eventually killed himself. I don’t see that happening with Putin but I do believe the military will remove him.

Let’s just hope that Putin is removed before he gets to the point of drafting children to protect him, which Hitler did because that’s all that was left to fight for Germany.

There are still men left to fight for Putin now, but there are not a lot of them who want to.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Puttin’ Around in Putin’s Basement


Vladimir Putin believed Ukraine was going to launch a new offensive in the south, so he deployed troops from the northeast of Ukraine to defend the south…and Ukraine then launched a major offensive in the northeast. Ukraine played rope-a-dope and Putin was the dope.

Ukraine forces were able to recapture dozens of villages and towns in over 6,000 sq kilometers (2,300 sq miles) of what is formerly Russian-occupied territory. The only people left who probably still believe Putin is a war genius are those bought and paid for by Putin, like Donald Trump, Tucker Carlson, Ted Rall, etc.

Now, even pro-Kremlin Russians are starting to question the war. We’ll see how long their health holds out.

This is Putin’s war. It’s obviously clear to everyone, especially to Russian soldiers fighting this war, that Vladimir Putin doesn’t care about anyone except Vladimir Putin. His own troops are describing themselves as “cannon fodder” for Putin. It’s not just Ukrainian elementary schools, hospitals, and apartment buildings Putin is willing to sacrifice, but his own people.

If this keeps up, Putin will be removed from power. He started this war over a lie (Nazis in Ukraine) and will keep lying to fight it. It’s hard to lie to his people that Russia’s winning when husbands, brothers, and sons aren’t coming home. Putin is getting so desperate that he has to purchase weapons from Iran and North Korea which violates all sorts of sanctions.

How far will Putin go to win this war and save face…and save his power? Will he go nuclear? Could that be assisted in any way by secrets provided by Donald Trump? it’s very plausible that Putin gained access to the classified documents Trump stole. We have to ask again: Why did Trump take these documents? Why? It’s a question Republicans should start asking, you know, if they were actual patriots and not sycophantic cultish butt boys.

Music Note: I listened to The Cars, but only songs sung by Ben Orr.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Gorby and Pootie


When I was a kid, I accepted that the world was going to end in my lifetime through nuclear war. In a way, it was kinda like the kids today who have never lived in a world before 9/11. Until 1990, I had never lived in a world without the Cold War. It was part of my culture. My son was born in 1990, so he barely missed it.

I was born a few years after the Cuban missile crisis, but I knew all about it. It was in my history books. Some of the first news events I noticed were about the cold war. I watched President Carter boycott the Moscow Olympics and then watched Russia boycott the Los Angeles Olympics. I watched on TV as Russia illegally invaded Afghanistan, which we didn’t learn anything from. I watched as we funded Afghanistan’s fight against Russia the same way Russia funded North Vietnam to fight us.

Everyone was fine with the United States and Russia fighting as long as they weren’t fighting each other.

In 1983, over 100 million people in this country watched The Day After, a TV movie about the day after nuclear exchanges between the U.S. and the Soviet Union. It scared the shit out of us. It remains to this day the second scariest movie to feature Steve Guttenberg after Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol (I had to look that up).

When the Soviet Union shot down a South Korean airliner in 1983, a lot of us kinda expected a war to start.

We all watched Red Dawn a thousand times, a film whose movie poster looked like a Lauren Boebert Christmas card and which to this day remains the second scariest movie to feature Charlie Sheen after Major League II. Later, we thought there was no way a movie could be made that made less sense than Red Dawn until they re-made Red Dawn with the Soviet/Cuban invasion replaced by one from North Korea. The original Red Dawn also featured Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey, but they had to wait until their next movie together to get it on. Fortunately for the couple, Commie Soviets don’t dirty dance.

We were all told we were going to die in that shitty keyboard-heavy song, “The Final Countdown,” by Europe, the second scariest band to ever come out of Sweden after the Nazi-heavy Ace of Base (turns out “The Sign” they saw was a Swastika).

And even if the United States and Russia weren’t going to fire nukes at each other, The Terminator told us machines would become self-aware and fire those nukes at us. I’m still afraid to buy a Roomba.

Even Elton John sang about a Soviet soldier behind the wall that he’d never get to be with because of the Cold War, which didn’t make any sense because “Nikita” is a guy’s name and….Oooh. Now I get it (but seriously, despite its relevancy being destroyed, “Nikita” is a really good song. It’s a lot better than that anti-Cold War song Sting did, called “Russians.” I bet you don’t remember that one).

We were living with the acceptance that we were doomed, which was kinda OK because it would save us from being embarrassed in the future when our kids found old pictures of us wearing neon spandex and huge shoulder pads (which is less embarrassing than your kids finding your Poison cassette. I swear, son…I’ve always hated “Every Rose Has Its Thorn”). I still don’t understand leg warmers.

And then Mikhail Gorbachev came along and brought Glasnost and Perestroika. He ended the Cold War, tore down the Berlin Wall, and with the help of Nirvana, ended Europe’s music career (name a second song from Europe. You can’t). Finally, Paul McCartney was able to sing “Back in the U.S.S.R” when in Moscow when it was no longer the U.S.S.R. Maybe Putin was listening when Macca sang “those Ukraine girls really knock me out.”

Gorbachev was the last Soviet leader. It wasn’t his intention to dismantle the Soviet Union or the Warsaw Pact, but that’s what he did. Oppski. Gorbachev initiated economic and political reforms. He knew the nation couldn’t survive under a strict communist economic system (people wanted to buy those acid-washed jeans). He tried to turn the Soviet Union from a one-party state into a socialist democracy…it didn’t work. And despite what Sputnik Boy Ted Rall will tell you, what Russia has today still doesn’t work.

After the Berlin Wall came down and eastern European nations, who also wanted to buy blue jeans and Cyndi Lauper records (if they had heard Poison, they may have rebuilt the wall), started to leave the Warsaw Pact, Gorbachev didn’t send the military in to stop them. After a coup attempt, nations started to leave the Soviet Union. Nations like Ukraine. Today, several former Soviet States consider Russia an enemy, which is pretty much the same way I feel about Poison (and Train…and Nickelback).

Mikhail Gorbachev refused to go to war to preserve the Soviet Union. Vladimir Putin is using war to build it back.

Putin never wanted democracy and is President of Russia today through sham elections. Putin’s political opponents turn up dead or are sent to prison. Putin is a fascist and is his net worth is estimated to be around $70 billion, which is pretty good considering he’s only had government jobs his entire life.

Putin has illegally invaded Ukraine, after illegally annexing Crimea. While the Russian military pales in comparison to the U.S. military ($70 billion a year vs. $800 billion), it still sits on top of approximately 6,000 nuclear weapons. The U.S. has fewer than 4,000 nuclear warheads. All it would take to end the world would be Putin to be irritable after some bad borscht or if someone played “Hey, Soul Sister” for him.

So yeah, we’re still all going to die in a nuclear armageddon, which at the very least, will save us from future Swedish Nazi rock music. Doo-da-doo-doo….doo-da-doo-doo-doo.

Music note: I listened to more Elton John while drawing this, but oddly enough, not “Nikita.”

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

B-Ball and Cannibal


It was bad enough that we are offering Victor Bout in exchange for basketball player Brittney Griner and accused spy Paul Whelan. But now, the Russians are asking for an assassin to be included in the deal, a convicted murderer who’s not even in United States custody.

Viktor Bout is a Russian arms dealer without the charm of Nicolas Cage who sold weapons to terrorists planning to attack the United States. He’s currently in U.S. custody serving 25 years after being convicted of conspiracy to kill U.S. citizens and officials, delivery of anti-aircraft missiles, and providing aid to a terrorist organization. I mean, damn. Even Donald Trump has only done two of those things.

I’m not sure about all the details with Paul Whelan as like the people holding him, the Russian Federal Security Service, Whelan has a long history of lying. But Brittney Griner is being held captive by Russia for possessing a little bit of hemp oil. What were the Russians afraid of? That she’d spread it around and Russian civilians would get the munchies? So, trading an innocent and harmless basketball player who’s never hurt anyone for a guy delivering anti-aircraft missiles with the intention to kill Americans is bullshit.

But now, the Russians want Vadim Krasikov, an assassin who murdered a Chechen fighter in Berlin in 2019. Krasikov was convicted in Germany. He’s not ours to give away.

What this means is that the Russians aren’t taking our offers of trading the arms dealer for Griner and Whelan seriously. They’re fucking with us.

Trades in professional sports will often include players from more than two teams. Usually, everyone gets some value…except the New Orleans Saints and Minnesota Vikings. Those teams always get fucked in deals. But then again, it was the Saints’ own stupidity that traded an entire draft for Ricky Williams with then head coach Mike Ditka announcing his willingness to do so two months before the draft, thus eroding any leverage he may have begun with (if you ever get an opportunity to play poker with Mike Ditka…DO IT!). It was the Vikings’ own stupidity that gave the Cowboys three Super Bowls in exchange for Herschel Walker, and this was before Herschel Walker was talking about our good air going to China with their bad air coming over here.

I just hope the Biden administration is smarter than the Ditka one. If not, we’re going to give Russia a bunch of murderers and terrorist arms dealers and all we’ll get in return will be a bunch of hot pockets and a Yugo.

I do believe President Biden is smarter than Mike Ditka. After all, Ditka’s a Trumper. You gotta be a moron or a white nationalist to be a Trumper. Biden is not a moron.

I just wish we could trade the equivalent of Brittney Griner for Brittney Griner. I mean, we have a lot of Russian hockey players. Can’t we just give one of those back to Russia? There’s a bunch of them making American dollars who’ve posed with Putin for photo-ops.

But then again, if Putin really wants a pro-Russian criminal who’s committed to destroying the United States, let’s go back to my original idea from last week. Let’s give him Donald Trump.

Music note: I listened to Men At Work.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Trading For Brittney


Why can’t we trade Donald Trump, Steve Bannon, Roger Stone, Michael Flynn, Paul Manafort, and Tucker Carlson to Russia for WNBA star Brittney Griner?

Brittney Griner was wrongly imprisoned. Even in a fascist oppressive state like Russia where the justice system is less consistent than Facebook’s algorithms, nobody should be sent to prison for possessing a little hemp oil. At the most, they should have given her a tiny fine. But what Russia is doing is holding Brittney, not as a prisoner, but as a hostage. They are using her as leverage to get something they want from the United States. This is a terrorist act. We are negotiating with terrorists. So, let’s give them some terrorists.

Donald Trump, Steve Bannon, Roger Stone, Michael Flynn, Paul Manafort, and Tucker Carlson have all supported terrorists. They’re great big fans of the white nationalist terrorist attack on our Capitol to overturn an election and make our nation more like Russia. They love Russia and fascism just as much as they love white nationalist terrorists.

There’s a pro-Trump goon on GoComics who always refers to me as “Comrade Clay” in an attempt to insult me, you know…because liberals are commies like Russia was back in the 80s, or some shit like that. But the people who have boners for Russia today aren’t liberals. They’re MAGAts. They love Putin. They love Russia. They love fascism. White nationalists see Russia as the last bastion of white purity.

These people love to tell us that if we don’t love America, then we should leave, yet they’re the ones whacking off to Russia.

Right now, we’re negotiating to release a Russian terrorist to Putin. Giving Putin Donald Trump, Steve Bannon, Roger Stone, Michael Flynn, Paul Manafort, and Tucker Carlson would be the same thing.

And, they should all want to go to Russia. Donald Trump worships and idolizes Putin. Steve Bannon is the poster child for American white nationalism and fascism. Paul Manafort was a lobbyist and political consultant for Russian proxies in Ukraine. Michael Flynn was literally paid by Russia. Our nation would just be better off without Roger Stone. And Tucker Carlson wonders why he should hate Putin and choose Ukraine over Russia. He doesn’t have to. Let’s send them all to Russia.

The only obstacle to this plan is that Russia won’t want them. Why would they? What can they do for Russia in Russia? They do a better job of serving Putin’s interests here in the United States, by trying to destroy the United States.

MAGAts always point out that Russia didn’t invade Ukraine while Trump was president (sic). True, but that’s because he didn’t have to. Trump was already trying to destroy NATO for Putin. Invading Ukraine during that time would have been counterproductive for them.

KY Patriot (seriously, that’s his name), another MAGAt on Truth Social, commented on my last cartoon on Brittney Griner saying that if Trump was president, she would be free by now because Trump and Putin are friends. He then wrote “Fuck Brittney and fuck Ukraine.”

Yeah, Trump and Putin are friends. That’s a good thing, to be pals with a fascist? Also, since he wants Brittney to stay in Russia, why is he bragging that Trump would free her? Also, since Trump could convince Putin to free Brittney, why didn’t he get Putin to release Paul Whelan? Whelan was abducted by Russia while Trump was in the White House.

This MAGAt hatred for Brittney is interesting. I saw a post by a goon on Facebook that Brittney deserves to be incarcerated in Russia and shouldn’t be allowed to return to this nation because she’s criticized it in the past. Meanwhile, they’re wearing caps that literally say America is not great. Consistency is a huge problem for MAGAts.

When Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly told Trump that Putin was a “killer” during an interview in 2017, Trump rushed to Putin’s defense and said, “There are a lot of killers. We have a lot of killers. Well, you think our country is so innocent?

You can criticize and love the United States. Closing your eyes and plugging your ears while singing “nanananananana” doesn’t fix anything.

But sending fascist MAGAt goons to Russia in a trade for Brittney would fix a LOT of shit. I think my proposal has merit. Since they love Russia so much, they should go live in Russia.

Music note: I listened to David Bowie and Dion while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Trump’s Secret Service


One thing that’s always baffled me is that Donald Trump receives special privileges that have been denied to others. For example, President Bill Clinton was forced to sit down and testify to Special Counsel Ken Starr, who was investigating if the president had received oral sex from a beret-wearing intern. Donald Trump only had to submit written answers to questions from Special Counsel Robert Mueller, who was investigating if Trump had colluded with Russia during his presidential campaign, which is obviously less serious than an Oval Office blowjob.

My inability to understand why Trump gets away with shit that others can’t is just a small part of my wider failure to understand why anyone goes full MAGA. Why do people join the cult? I don’t get it and I never will.

You think you know someone and believe they’re a rational person, and then one day after knowing them for decades, they start chanting “build the wall” and saying stupid shit like, “Let’s go, Brandon.”

The Secret Service is supposed to be nonpartisan. They protect the president, his family, and other officials no matter what party they’re a member of and no matter what their positions are on any subject. The Secret Service’s job is to protect, not serve as part of the administration. They don’t help with policy or politics. They don’t sell the president’s plans to the public. Yet, one Secret Service agent was allowed to take a leave of absence so he could join the Trump administration and then return to his former position in the Secret Service.

Anthony Ornato was the Deputy Assistant Director of the Secret Service and the agent in charge of Trump’s protective detail until he took a leave of absence to become Trump’s Deputy Chief of Staff. Like most things in the Trump administration, this was unprecedented. But just like the Emoluments Clause, this too was ignored.

Donald Trump was allowed to bilk the government. He was allowed to keep his private company. He was allowed to own a hotel on government property. He was allowed to charge the government rent on his properties. He was allowed to award medals during the Republican National Convention. He was allowed to hold the convention on the White House Lawn. He was allowed to shoot off fireworks at the Washington Monument at the end of the Republican National Convention. Maybe if previous presidents didn’t have ethics either, then they could have demanded and gotten away with devious shit too.

A Secret Service agent revealing he had gone full MAGA was like the time the White House physician claimed Donald Trump was in such perfect health that he could live to be 200 years old.

Ornato has served in the Secret Service since 1997 and had a very distinguished career…then he went full MAGA. He helped organize Trump’s upside-down Bible photo-op at St. John’s Church after the Black Lives Matter protesters were cleared out by the military using smoke bombs and tear gas.

Ornato also witnessed the exchange between Trump and his driver, Secret Service agent Mike Engel, who according to Cassidy Hutchinson’s testimony to the January 6 Committee, Trump had lunged at to force him to drive to the Capitol on January 6. Since we’re questioning the integrity of the Secret Service, it should be noted that Engel didn’t report the incident to his superiors for over 14 months.

The Secret Service protects the president, but this Secret Service appears to be protecting MAGA. Washington Post reporter Carol Leonnig characterized Engel and Ornato as “very, very close to President (sic) Trump.” During an interview with MSNBC promoting her book on the Secret Service, “Fuckers and the Evil Fucking Shit they Fuck with,” (I made that up) she said “some people accused them of at times being enablers and ‘yes men’ of the president — particularly Tony Ornato — and very much people who wanted to … see him pleased.” Leonnig said there was a large contingent of Trump’s Secret Service detail that wanted Biden to fail and some “took to their personal media accounts to cheer on the insurrection and the individuals riding up to the Capitol as patriots.”

Then, the Secret Service lost every text message between agents that were sent and received on January 6.

The Inspector General for the Department of Homeland Security, Joseph Cuffari, sent a letter to the House and Senate Homeland Security committees reporting the texts the messages from January 5 and 6, 2021 “were erased as part of a device-replacement program,” adding they were deleted after the inspector general had requested records of Secret Service electronic communications as part of a review of events leading up to the January 6 insurrection.

What we need is a Secret Service replacement program.

The Secret Service is outraged at the idea they’d purposely delete text messages and be a part of Donald Trump’s coverup. They issued a statement saying, “the insinuation that the Secret Service maliciously deleted text messages following a request is false.” And then they told the Inspector that none of the text being sought had been lost in the migration.”

Well, here’s the thing: If they’re lost, then how do you know none of them are what the Inspector General is seeking? Hmm? These are not the droids you’re looking for?

This doesn’t pass the smell test. In fact, when the migration of data was coming up, the Secret Service told its agents they could pick and choose which text messages needed to be saved. They told a bunch of corrupt Trumpers they could make the decision on which information to preserve from the day Donald Trump tried to overthrow the government. So naturally, it’s just a coincidence they happened to lose all the texts during a white nationalist MAGA insurrection.

Now, get this: James Murray, the Director of the Secret Service, is retiring and taking a job in the private sector. Where in the private sector is he going? He’s joining Snap Chat to become its Chief Security Officer. Do you know what the main feature of Snap Chat is? The messages are automatically deleted after a short time. Snap Chat is perfect for sending pics of your penis and planning insurrections.

Did Murray list the lost insurrection texts on the resume he supplied to the Snap fuckers? “Accomplishments: Oversaw program of deleting text that was evidence of a full-scale seditious attempt by white nationalist goons to destroy American democracy and install an unelected Cheeto-Potentate as a fascist mango dictator. Let’s go, Brandon.” You’re hired!

I assume Secret Service agents have to take an oath. There’s probably some mention in that oath about loyalty and serving their country. Maybe they just forgot about the oath or maybe they were lying when they took it. It’s disgusting to think of the Secret Service as a bunch of Steve Bannons.

Secret Service agents should respect our government and constitution. They should understand they are protecting the president more than they’re serving an individual human being, especially one as vile, corrupt, and flawed as Donald Trump. I don’t understand why people who’ve committed their lives to an agency serving their country abandon everything switch their loyalty to a racist cult.

The Secret Service is too secret. They need to answer questions about January 6. They need to answer questions about their own actions. If they want to be more Ronnie Jacksons, then leave your government positions. Serve America, not MAGA. This is another warning sign that our democracy is fragile. If the Secret Service helps engineer a coup, we could lose everything.

Secret Service agents should not be part of coups and coverups.

Music note: I listened to Foo Fighters’ “Wasting Light” album.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Free Brittney


All-star American basketball star Brittney Griner has been in a Russian prison for over 140 days despite the fact she’s not a criminal. And despite the fact she’s not a criminal, she pleaded guilty this week and admitted wrongdoing in packing smoking cartridges in her luggage that contained less than a single gram of hashish oil. It wasn’t even hash. It was ish.

The seven-time All-Star center for the W.N.B.A.’s Phoenix Mercury now faces ten years in a Russian prison. She is being used as leverage for Vladimir Putin in his negotiations with the west.

After Russia illegally invaded Ukraine, the democratic world shut off most trade and set embargoes on Putin’s fascist state. Throughout the world, Russian oligarchs are having their yachts seized. The economy in Russia wasn’t strong to begin with but now it’s teetering on a total collapse. So, Brittney picked a bad time to go to Russia.

Brittney’s plan was to play in the professional Russian basketball league during the WNBA’s offseason. She’s one of the biggest stars in the WNBA and makes around $227,000 a year playing for the Mercury. By comparison, the average NBA salary is over $7 million a year. There’s been speculation over how much effort would be put into freeing a basketball star unfairly imprisoned in Russia if that star was Lebron James…but Lebron James would never have to supplement his income by playing in Russia. NBA players who spend the majority of their career riding the bench would never have to supplement their income by playing in Russia.

There’s not enough outrage and demand in this country to free Brittney. There was more noise being made to free the other Britney from her father controlling her life and business.

Britney Spears is white and blonde. Brittney Griner is nearly seven feet tall, has dreadlocks, is covered in tattoos, black, and is a lesbian. Unfortunately, there’s a large percentage of our population who hate LGBTQ as much as Vladimir Putin.

Note: Another cartoonist will now use the Britney/Brittney comparison for a cartoon now that I’ve made it in this column.

Last Wednesday in Phoenix, the city where Brittney Griner plays and won a WNBA championship, a rally was held for her in the Footprint Center, the Mercury’s home arena which seats over 17,000 people. Only 300 people showed up. How many would have shown up if the player Putin was holding hostage was the Suns’ Chris Paul? Probably at least a few more than 300.

Brittney Griner is not the only American Putin is holding hostage. Paul Whelan has been in a Russian prison since the Trump administration, which should be noted since Trump recently claimed that if he were still president (sic), Brittney would have been freed by now. Sure.

It’s believed Brittney pled guilty to speed the process along and further negotiations between the United States and Russia for her release. Keep in mind that Russia’s judicial system isn’t exactly like ours.

There’s been talk of a prisoner swap with Brittney being traded for Viktor Bout, a Russian who has been imprisoned in the United States since 2012 on a 25-year sentence for conspiring to sell weapons to terrorists planning to kill Americans. During his sentencing, prosecutors called Bout “among the world’s most successful and sophisticated arms traffickers.” He is known as the Merchant of Death.

It’s a lopsided deal to trade the Merchant of Death, who was participating in a terrorist plot against Americans, for a very tall black lesbian whose only crime was carrying a little hashish oil in a vape cartridge. At the very least, Paul Whelan should be included in the trade.

Brittney wrote a letter to President Biden saying, “I’m terrified I might be here forever. Please don’t forget about me.” While receiving the Presidential Medal of Freedom from President Biden this week, U.S. soccer player Megan Rapinoe wore a white suit with the letters “BG” on it for Brittney Griner. She later posted on Instagram, “BG, we love you.” She also posted “BG is being used as a political pawn and we need to bring her (home) immediately. This plea doesn’t change that @potus needs to and is working hard to get her home.”

We can’t forget Brittney Griner. Bring Brittney Griner home now.

Free Brittney.

Music note: I listened to the Kaiser Chiefs while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Happy Putin Day


Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday. 

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Moskva Sinksva


After the Russian warship, Moskva was struck by two Ukrainian missiles, the official position of the Kremlin was “nyuh-uh.” The first response was that it was a small fire from an explosion in their ammunition storage. That could be true. There was an explosion in their ammunition storage…after it was hit by two Ukrainian missiles. As the ship was being towed to a Russian port in the Black Sea, it sank. The Russians blame “heavy seas” for the sinking.

Here’s a fun fact: Moskva was built in Ukraine. It’s an old ship from the Soviet era, when Ukraine was a part of the Soviet Union against its will, like how it’s against our will that Florida is a part of the United States. The ship was laid down in 1976 and launched in 1979. It’s served in Russian conflicts in Georgia, Crimea, and Syria…everywhere Russia shouldn’t have been.

The Moskva wasn’t just any old boat. It was the flagship of the Russian Black Sea fleet. Russia stepped up its attacks in Eastern Ukraine after the sinking. Some Russian officials, forgetting the state explanation, said that Ukraine sinking the Moskva is an “act of war,” after Russia’s been bombing that nation for the past five weeks.

Russia claims the entire crew of 510 was evacuated, but several family members of the crew are wondering why they’re not getting any letters or phone calls from their missing sons. As Ad-Rock said in “Rhymin’ and Stealin’,” they delivered Colonel Sanders down to Davy Jones Locker.

Vladimir Solovyov, Russia’s Tucker Carlson who’s not Russia’s actual Tucker Carlson, said on his popular Russian state TV show, “Vladimir 2Night” (I made that up), “Just explain to me how you managed to lose it!” Yeah, as if it was misplaced. Have you checked the couch cushions? Solovyov was expressing anger at the Russian Navy which means the other Vladimir is extremely upset and soon, a Russian Navy fall guy will fall off the top of a building in Moskva, which is Moscow. Solovyov is considered the “voice of Putin.” He doesn’t say anything unless Putin says it’s OK, kinda like the way Putin writes the talking points forTucker Carlson, Ted Rall, and Donald Trump.

Whether it was hit by Ukrainian missiles, the ammo storage just self exploded, a permed-up sailor left a plugged-in curling iron on his bunk, or someone was deep-frying a turkey in the cargo hold (those things are dangerous. I’m surprised Bubba terrorists aren’t using them on black churches. synagogues, mosques, Disneyland, and capitol buildings), the loss of the Moskva is a heavy loss for Russia’s war effort. The sinking doesn’t just eliminate one ship from firing at baby hospitals in Odessa. It eliminates several, at least for the time being.

Moskva wasn’t a ship that conducted land attacks. It provided air cover and coordinated the attacks from other ships in its fleet. The Moskva is the largest ship to be sunk in combat since World War II. Additional humiliation for Russia is that Moskva is named for Moscow, Russia’s capital. This is another instance of Russia underestimating the fighting capabilities of Ukraine. The Ukrainians were not supposed to be able to sink the Moskva as it’s a ship designed to defend against incoming missiles.

Another fun fact: Moskva was the ship at Snake Island at the start of the war ordering Ukrainian soldiers to surrender, and got the reply, “Russian warship, go fuck yourself.” Right now, crabs are fucking it.

I try to avoid using clichés in my work, like sinking ships. The sinking ship analogy is one of the most overused clichés in the political cartooning business. Nearly every cartoonist has drawn a sinking ship at some point in their career, but some jackholes use it like it was forced upon them. Google “Gary Varvel sinking ship cartoon.” To be fair, I’ve drawn at least three “Where all the white women at” cartoons over the past five years or so. I’ve drawn two Jerk cartoons, where Donald Trump is Steve Martin in “The Jerk” wearing the bathrobe and clutching several items while saying, “I don’t need anything…except this lamp.” I’ll probably never use that one again as between my two Jerk cartoons, another cartoonist used it and then publicly accused me of stealing it from him.

But then again, never say “never.”

When Afghanistan President Ashraf Ghani fled his nation as the Taliban was taking over, I drew a sinking ship cartoon with Ghani paddling a lifeboat away. It was the perfect analogy for the situation, but I felt dirty. I promised myself that I would not draw another sinking ship cartoon unless it pertained to an actual sinking ship. Then, I got an actual sinking ship. I thought what better way to use a cliché about an actual sinking ship than to make the cliché the joke? It mocks my entire industry, myself included.

Now let’s see how long I can go without drawing a sinking ship again. Drawing cartoons about actual ships that sank doesn’t count.

Music Note: I listened to Led Zeppelin while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: