Kanye For President


At last weekend’s MTV Video Music Awards (they still have those?) Kanye West says he’s going to run for president in 2020. Why 2020 and not 2016? Because there’s so much insanity in Campaign 2016 that we’re going to have to save some for 2020. Donald Trump has started talking about perverts for God’s sake. Campaign 2016 is the best presidential campaign ever! Well it is for me, the general public not so much.

Since one of the GOP candidates is black the party can now claim diversity. None of their voters are African American but that one black candidate who’s campaigning on issues that will benefit rich white men totally diversifies the party.

Ben Carson isn’t just a candidate. He’s the number two candidate. And unlike Trump he’s running a very quiet campaign. What boggles my mind is that Carson is a doctor. He’s separated conjoined twins. Yet he talks like he’s never cracked open a science text book before, especially when he makes statements like “a lot of people who go in­to pris­on go in­to pris­on straight””and when they come out, they’re gay.”

He says some other crazy stuff too like this is Gestapo age. I thought the Gestapo age was the age when the Gestapo actually existed. Maybe I should crack open a history book. Maybe he was talking about gazpacho. He could be a cold soup fan.

He could use some time in front of a history book also. He’s stated that student who graduate from advanced history courses would be ready to sign up for ISIS. What? He’s also compared Obamacare to slavery. Again….what?

We should probably warn Australia that Carson’s wife has stated they’re prepared to move there if the election doesn’t go their way.

Other than that, I just like to draw Republicans being stupid. It fits. Did you know that a recent poll found that 29% of Republican voters believe Obama was born in the United States. If you think that’s stupid, 40% believe Ted Cruz was born in the United States. There are some things I can’t make up.


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