Happy Trumpiversary


cjones01232018

Poor Donald Trump. It kinda makes your heart hurt for the big lovable lug. He would much rather be at Mar-a-Lago right now celebrating the first anniversary of his administration with billionaires and millionaires paying for the opportunity to tell him how great he is and kiss his ass. Instead, he has to remain in Washington during a government shutdown while hundreds of thousands of angry women are marching, cursing his name. Why are they cursing his name? Because he’s an asshole and he sucks. Where have you been for the past year…or twenty?

What sort of optics would it have been for Trump to complain Washington doesn’t work while he’s shaking his booty at one of his I-Smell-Terrific parties raising campaign funds? The optics are so terrible that I’m surprised he was convinced, at the last minute, not to go. Maybe Stephen Baby Goebbels Miller convinced him, as he’s been the one with the most sway in the White House recently. Nazis are fine people, your authority will not be questioned, kick out dreamers, don’t go to that party.

Just how appropriate is it that Trump’s first anniversary coincides with a government shutdown? What did you expect from a guy with five bankruptcies and multiple failed business failures who promised to run the government the way he runs his businesses? Hell, the man’s business of giving business advice went out of business. Hello?

The man who said presidenting would be easy isn’t making it look easy. This kind of stuff doesn’t just happen. I’m sure there’s some karma to it, though that’s working way too slow for my taste. But, shutdowns come from failed leadership. Trump is a failed president. You can’t put issues off for months, make deals, make promises, and then break all of them, and then claim the high ground. You can’t blame the party out of power when the government doesn’t work. You especially can’t blame the party out of power when you promised you would make it work, and we’d get tired of “winning.”

Trump promised he would sign on to bipartisan agreements for the Dreamers, and he broke that promise. Tell me this: With regards to the shutdown, what exactly has Trump proposed that’s bipartisan? What has he given to the other side? The thing that dismays me the most is that Mexico is not paying for the wall, and we’re supposed to be angry at Democrats.

Trump’s anniversary isn’t the only one happening this weekend. I mentioned the women marching in Washington. It’s not just D.C.

At this time last year, Millions of women marched in protest against Trump and his agenda, not just in the United States, but worldwide. Last Saturday and Sunday, the march was commemorated with even more marches.

The march is going from women demonstrating to registering people to vote, to women running as candidates. Last year in Virginia, first-time candidates, women, unseated incumbent male Republicans for the state’s General Assembly. Women, black women, in particular, sent a Democrat from Alabama into the United State’s Senate.

Republican males scoffed last year. They’re still scoffing. That’s OK. Let them make their “I have to make my own dinner” jokes. If they’re not trying to understand it by now, then they can continue to make their sexist jokes while Republicans lose their majority in Washington.

Speaking of not getting “it,” Trump responded to the Women’s March with, “Beautiful weather all over our great country, a perfect day for all Women to March. Get out there now to celebrate the historic milestones and unprecedented economic success and wealth creation that has taken place over the last 12 months. Lowest female unemployment in 18 years!” That’s some serious stupid.

The future doesn’t only belong to white males. It belongs to women, blacks, Latinos, gays, transgenders, etc. The sooner we get there, the better.

Creative notes: I woke up early Sunday morning and did a few accounting chores for my business. I planned to watch the NFL championships games later and decided to start drawing this cartoon around 1:00 p.m., skip the first game (because the Patriots always win) and go out, drink a beer, eat some wings, and watch the Vikings/Eagles game.

My original idea was to make the bulk of this cartoon dark grey, with only the balloons, women, and Trump’s tie colored. I did that and I wasn’t happy with it. I changed a few things and changed a few more and next thing I knew, seven hours went by. Seven hours? Who does that?

I don’t think I apply myself to my work for seven hours because I’m more committed, focused, or better than other cartoonists. I think I do it because I suck. Anyway, I finished the cartoon and went out and made it to the bar at halftime. After the game, I came home and redid the coloring. I’m still not totally happy with it, but I’m done. It actually took over 12 hours to do this cartoon, which I thought I’d whip out in a couple of hours.

I gotta stop thinking about it so much.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print (please specify which print you want or I won’t mail one). All donations will receive my eternal gratitude

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3 comments

  1. “That’s some serious stupid.”
    No, the Really Serious Stupid are the 45* Butt Kissing Women, like Huck, Kellyanne, Coulter, etc. who repeat and double down on this BS from 45*, and of course the 30%/Deplorable/Evangelical/Goober Women Who Buy This BS From 45*.

    Like

  2. “and next thing I knew, seven hours went by. Seven hours? Who does that?“

    I does that. You are probably not as old as me, but I think you qualify, as I do, to be called an Old Techno-Fart, a Youth-Challenged Person (usually male) who has enough experience with Technology to become [enslaved by / addicted to] their electronic devices. I am a retired S/W Engineer who can’t go to the bathroom without my iPhone, and you are an artist who draws on a computer who probably also can’t go to the bathroom without your iPhone (or Android/Windows Phone).

    How does Seven Hours happen?
    I’m guessing that you sit down, turn on your computer, and wait eons while the Recently Updated Operating System cycles through a bunch of Do Nothing Loops while it boots up to make your Ancient (greater than 1 year old) Computer run so slow that you just gotta get a New One Right Away. Then you open your drawing program and wait eons while the Recently Updated Operating System cycles through a bunch of Do Nothing Loops while it opens the drawing program to make your Ancient (greater than 1 year old) Computer run so slow that you just gotta get a New One Right Away.
    Then you draw your cartoon, erase and redraw parts of it, add some colors, fiddle with the colors, erase and redraw other parts, play with some special effects and other features that you just discovered and you probably should use them since you have them anyway, fiddle with the colors, erase and redraw other parts, start cursing like a drunken marine when the Blue Screen pops up and the computer reboots while running Do Nothing Loops Yadda Yadda Yadda and you discover that you forgot to frequently save your work so you gotta do it all over again and you ALMOST throw the computer out the window (another proven technique to force you to buy a new one) but you don’t and then you sit there cursing and crying for a while and then you calm down and redo the cartoon and you are not totally happy with it but you send it in anyway several hours later than you planned and then you collapse or get drunk and then collapse.
    Then you do it all over again the next day.
    The End.

    The Solution?
    Go ahead and throw the computer out the window BUT DON’T buy a new one. Dust off some paper and colored pencils and some erasers (or if you never used them before go buy and learn how to use some paper and drawing stuff and erasers) and start drawing your cartoons by hand. At first it will be hard, but after a while you will get the hang of it. I bet you will be cranking out a cartoon in less than an hour.

    Or you can ignore all the crap that I have written and keep beating your brains out on the computer so you will have something to complain about in “Creative Notes”.

    Liked by 1 person

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