Face Mask

Facemask Losers


CNN09062020

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday.

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi violated California state law when she went to a hair salon and at least for a minute, didn’t wear a face mask.

A video was released of her walking from one room to the other without the mask. Pelosi claims it was a setup as she called the salon, where she’s been a customer for years, and an employee told her to come in.

Pelosi is responsible for this. She should have known the state law and she should have worn a face mask for the entire visit. But that said, yeah, it was a setup. How do I know it was a setup? Because we’ve seen the video.

In fact, White House spokesgoon Kayleigh McEnany began a press briefing about the video and ran it on a loop for several minutes. The thing about this is, it shouldn’t be the White House promoting and advancing this video. It’s bad politics. What they should do is just let their conservative allies do it. Yeah, it’s still hypocritical and stupid, but at least they could have the semblance of keeping their hands clean and government employees like Kayleigh McEnany wouldn’t have to conduct herself like a goon.

But which is it? Are we supposed to be upset at someone for not wearing a mask for a minute or are we supposed to mock people who wear masks?

Look at the Republican convention. There were two nights where the Trump team created crowds, one at Fort McHenry in Baltimore and the other on the South Lawn. Not only did these two acts violate the Hatch Act and abuse public property for partisan political events, they didn’t practice social distancing. Face masks were not required. You have to remember the last time Trump put together a huge party for a political event, it killed Herman Cain, who, by the way, they failed to mention once during their four-nights of lies and bullshit.

Last week, Donald Trump mocked Joe Biden for wearing a mask. Trump said, “Did you ever see a man who likes a mask as much as him?. It gives him a feeling of security.”

Then, the guy who should be in a padded room while wearing a jacket that ties in the back said, “If I were a psychiatrist — right? I’d say, this guy’s got some big issues. Hanging down.” Hanging down? What the hell is that? Anyway…

So far in this pandemic, due to a virus Donald Trump has ignored at times and downplayed at others, has killed nearly 185,000 Americans. So, why the hell is he mocking someone for wearing a face mask which is recommended by the Center for Disease Control and the White House Coronavirus Task Force?

What’s next? Making fun of people who have died from it? Calling them weak or better yet for Trump, losers?

Donald Trump is the president (sic) of the United States. Every time someone says “President Trump,” my skin crawls because it’s the most disgusting thing there is…but he is the president (sic). Yet, he can’t be presidential. He can’t exhibit leadership. Joe Biden can. Joe Biden is being presidential.

Joe Biden is demonstrating by example, showing leadership, and taking the virus seriously. Donald Trump finds that something to mock.

Donald Trump refuses to be president for the entire nation. He refuses to be a leader in the same way he refuses to be an adult, mature, responsible, accountable, or credible.

Wearing face masks saves lives. Experts predict fewer deaths and a quicker end to this pandemic if we all wore face masks. Donald Trump is politicizing it and making fun of people for wearing face masks.

Wearing a face mask is the patriotic thing to do. But then again, we all know how Donald Trump feels about patriotism.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

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Mask Conspiracy


cjones07202020

The grocery store I shop at the most in-person is Giant which is in my neighborhood. It’s not the most uppity place in the world, like a Whole Foods, nor is it like an Aldi (where I have groceries delivered from) where there aren’t a lot of name brands (instead of Cheerios, you get Cheery Oats or something like that). Giant is a nice clean place with fair prices and most of the customers aren’t nose pickers and they look like the kind of people who bathe daily, and yet even Giant can’t convince all their customers to wear a face mask.

In Virginia, face masks are required at every business. Giant has signs that forbid shopping without a face mask yet, every time you go in there, you will see fuckers without face masks. I didn’t want to start any trouble, but me being me, as I was walking out one day, I asked a manager why they were continuing to allow customers to shop without face masks. The manager told me they couldn’t prevent them from shopping without the mask. I told her, “actually, you can.”

So I’m thinking, if Giant is having trouble convincing all their customers to wear a face mask, good luck, Walmart.

Last year, Walmart told its customers to stop carrying visible guns into its stores which sounds like a reasonable request. Walmart discovered mass shootings inside their stores aren’t really good for business. Yet, in the grand tradition of how they usually respond to something reasonable, a lot of conservatives freaked out and were livid. Fortunately for Walmart, it’s like crack to its customers. Their customers might be mad they can’t open carry, but what are they going to do, go to Target (no pun intended)?

My late mother was a Walmart addict. I had to tell her people don’t visit Hawaii to go to Walmart. They go to Costco.

Now, Walmart is requiring face masks to be worn at each of its stores nationwide. This is a good thing. The list of stores with this requirement is growing. It includes Best Buy, Starbucks, Costco, Apple, Dollar Tree, Trader Joe’s, and of course Whole Foods.

Donald Trump visited Walter Reed Hospital last week just for an excuse to finally stage a photo-op with a mask, so he could look somewhat responsible. Otherwise, Donald Trump is discouraging mask-wearing and his base of stupid racist fucknuts believe it’s a conspiracy by the big government to control them. They believe mask wearers are cowards (while they’re afraid to leave their homes without a gun) and they’ll be damned if they’re going to start wearing face masks just because it’s the safe thing to do, like seatbelts. Face masks and seatbelts are for pussies, don’t you know?

The people who are not wearing face masks are disrespecting everyone. They’re going beyond disrespecting we who are wearing masks and putting some effort into it. They’re disrespecting the health workers who have to treat Covid patients. If you’re not wearing a face mask, you’re just being an asshole. Every time I’m shopping and I see you without a face mask, I want to kick you in the balls…if I could find them.

You do not have a right to shop at Giant, or Walmart, or Target, or wherever you choose. Businesses are private and it’s a privilege to shop at them. They can kick you out.

If every single one of us wore a face mask, we’d probably kick the coronavirus out of our nation in a matter of weeks. Yet, people want to be assholes. Wearing a face mask is too much of a hassle for them. It’s too much of a hassle even for some governors.

Florida, Georiga, and Texas rushed to reopen. They skipped over several safety steps to do so. Now, while cases are decreasing from the former hot spots of New York City and Michigan, they’re spiking in those red states. The governor of Oklahoma, who attended the Trump Tulsa hate rally, has tested positive for coronavirus…just like the mask-hating president of Brazil. At what point will Republicans put two and two together and arrive at four?

Wearing mask good. Not wearing mask bad.

While Greg Abbott, the Governor of Texas, realized he opened his state too quickly and is now requiring face masks to be worn publicly, Florida’s stupid Governor, Ron DeSantis, is still in denial as is Governor Brian Kemp of Georgia. Kemp is actually fighting the mayor of Atlanta over her mandate for masks to be worn in her city. These governors are willing to risk your life so they can get Donald Trump’s approval. They would rather your child catch a deadly virus than for them to catch a hate tweet.

Conservatives still don’t get it. They think wearing the mask is a personal choice. They think if you feel safe, then you shouldn’t be forced to wear a mask. But it’s not your choice to infect me. MAGAts still don’t understand how the virus is spread. Wear a mask, you stupid motherfuckers. Wear a mask! Wear a mask! Wear a mask! Wear a mask, goddammit!

So here’s my prediction: There are going to be headlines very soon of altercations at Walmarts across the country caused by fuckers refusing to wear face masks. And a lot of them will be wearing MAGA shirts.

Wear….A….Mask!!!

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

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Grandpa Trump’s Magik Elixir


CNN05242020

Here’s your cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

As I wrote a few days ago, the only reason Donald Trump is pushing junk science is to be divisive. The man wants to divide Americans as much as possible. For some reason, he believes it benefits him. Donald Trump only cares about Donald Trump.

He pushes medication that hasn’t been proven to help anyone. If anything, it’s proven to hurt people and even kill them. Donald Trump doesn’t care.

Donald Trump doesn’t want to be seen wearing a mask. He claims it’s to deny the image from reporters, which is childish. Reporters and the media didn’t create the mask narrative. They don’t own it. The truth is, Donald Trump likes politicizing the pandemic. He likes that his supporters are refusing to wear a mask because for them, it’s a political statement.

I wear a mask everytime I go out. When I do it, I don’t think I’m making a political statement. I’m proud to be a liberal and I stand on my positions and beliefs, but the mask isn’t a part of that. I wear the mask because the science community highly recommends it. I wear the mask to protect myself, but mostly to protect others. I wear the mask for the same reason I’ve been staying home which is to do my small part in protecting my nation and helping kill this virus. I also wear it not to be a selfish asshole to other people. It’s not a political statement to wear a mask.

When you don’t wear the mask, even if you’re not trying to make a political statement, you’re saying you’re a selfish asshole. You really are. And if you are wearing it to make a political statement, then you’re putting the health of others, including people you love, as risk for your politics. The majority of this nation is trying to kill this thing while the rest of you are keeping it alive.

Keep in mind, you’re following medical advice from a guy who believes in windmill cancer and asked about drinking bleach to kill a virus. You’re taking advice from a guy who spreads conspiracy theories. You’re taking medical advice from a man so out of shape, he’s afraid of stairs.

But then again, maybe Donald Trump is just trying to see what he can get away with. Maybe he’s bored because we know he’s not busy being president. Perhaps he’s trying to come up with the dumbest things to see what his base will support. He told them to use medication the medical community says can kill you. His base rallies to his defense. He told his base to “liberate” blue states. They held rallies. He encourages his base not to wear a mask and to gather in large groups and breathe on each other. Done. He fucking told them to drink household cleaning products.

Donald Trump is a carnival barker. He’s always been a con man. But con men need stupid people to succeed. Fortunately for Trump, there are plenty of those and they’re all Republicans.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

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Sniveling Corona Cowards


cjones05192020

I’ve always liked the actor Kevin James. I liked his show, King of Queens, and thought he did a great job and matched well with Will Smith in Hitch. Heck, I even liked Paul Blart a little. Granted, everything else he’s done has kinda sucked, but I still liked him. He’s always seemed like an everyman kinda dude. Now, I like him a little less.

Kevin James’ latest production is the worst thing he’s ever made. Yeah. Even worse than Paul Blart 2. It’s worse than Grown Ups. It’s even worse than Grown Ups 2. It’s probably worse than that movie where he talks to zoo animals. I say probably because I haven’t seen it but it looks pretty bad. Do you want proof his latest thing is bad? The conservative Trump cult fucknuts love it.

James has a YouTube channel where he posts short films. His latest film is about two men on the run from the authorities for being out in public without wearing masks and for shaking hands. Seriously.

There are now 86,000 deaths in this nation from the coronavirus and Kevin James has joined all those idiots crying about their “freedom” when nobody has taken their freedom. Despite nobody being arrested for not wearing a mask or for shaking hands, James has joined in with the shitweasel brigade and the Flat Earthers. I understand satire but I also understand propaganda. This tilts more toward the latter. This is some real Ben Garrison shit.

These idiots who scream about their liberties and storm state capitals with guns, Nazi symbols, and nooses, NEVER speak out when a black man is profiled or killed by the police. They NEVER speak out when voting rights are denied to non-white American citizens. They NEVER defend free speech except whenever a university disinvites a Nazi from speaking on their campus. But now, they have a new hero in Kevin James. Congratulations, Kevin. You’re in the same club as Ted Nugent and James Woods. Heck, you’re in the same club as the worst Baldwin brother, You know. Whatsisname Baldwin brother.

These people who have watched Red Dawn too many times act as though their purchase of a gun is supporting the Second Amendment. They believe carrying an assault weapon with them everywhere they go, whether it’s Chick-fil-A or the state capitol building, defends their Second Amendment Rights.

These gun nuts who describe themselves as “Constitutionalists” only know one Constitutional Amendment. And even then, they bastardize it by ALWAYS omitting the “well-regulated” part. Anytime you mention “regulation” in the context of guns, they scream you’re taking away their Second Amendment rights despite the fact “well regulated” is literally in the Second Amendment. I swear. Look it up.

But, if their buying a gun reinforces their Second Amendment rights, then me telling them they’re all a bunch of racist Kool-Aid drinking cultist knuckle-dragging treasonous Putin-Loving dumbasses reinforces my First Amendments rights.

Keep in mind, the people who believe being “forced” to wear masks and closing the country is all designed to steal their freedom and punish Donald Trump also believe Climate Change is a hoax.

Now, they’re saying you’re a coward if you don’t leave your house without a mask. Why look how brave they are by going outside without a face covering. Why look how brave their president (sic) is being the only one not wearing a mask while visiting a PPE plant or a factory that actually makes masks. They are so proud. I’m sorry but I don’t think stupidity is something to be proud of.

The people staying home and wearing masks are the true patriots. They’re not just protecting themselves. They’re protecting you even though you don’t deserve it.

The real cowards are supporters of Donald Trump. They’re afraid to leave their houses without assault weapons and they vote for a guy who runs on a campaign of fear. Trump supporters are afraid of everything.

But then again, calling us “cowards” for doing the right thing and protecting our nation is once again them projecting. We need to protect our nation from the coronavirus and all…

…we need to protect our nation from gun-toting sniveling coward Trump supporters.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Quack


cjones05112020

After Mike Pence visited the Mayo Clinic, he caught a lot of heat for not wearing a face mask. His wife, Mother, told the press that they were unaware beforehand that masks were required inside the clinic. After being exposed as another lie from the administration, the Trump team threatened the reporter. What was the lie? The press accompanying Pence to the clinic was told beforehand by the Trump team that masks were required.

A few days later, Pence did wear a mask while touring a General Motors plant in Kokomo, Indiana (where I have family), because while it’s not important to infect patients at the Mayo Clinic. you really don’t want to spread the coronavirus to car engines. You really don’t want to create a Chevy-powered virus.

Donald Trump, itching to get out of the White House and resume his hate rallies where he can lead racist chants, set out to visit Honeywell, a mask factory in Arizona. He could have visited one much closer in Rhode Island but Arizona is a swing state. In case you’re a Republican, Rhode Island is on the east coast, just like the White House where the president (sic) lives. Arizona is on the west coast.

Before going, Trump was all, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’ll wear a mask…maybe.” But in the photos and video of the factory tour, Trump was NOT wearing a mask. Later, he said he did but the press missed those moments.

That makes about as much sense as Pence saying he didn’t wear a mask covering his pie and nose holes because he wanted to look people in their eyes. What the hell? Maybe Trump only wore the mask around blacks and Mexicans in the plant. Who knows.

I think Trump is lying. He didn’t wear a face mask at the…FACE-MASK factory!!! And he can’t claim they didn’t know wearing face masks were a requirement because there was a big sign at the entrance reading, “Attention, face mask is required in this area.” But then again, this is Trump and to have to read the sign, he’d have to be literate. He may also claim he thought his photo op with Honeywell was supposed to be with Honey Boo-Boo.

But, Donald Trump wants to look tough. He wants his stupid base of racist voters to believe he’s immune. He wants to give the impression masks aren’t that important which will discourage them from wearing masks, especially when they’re storming their state capitals to scream in the face of police that they need haircuts and cheesecakes.

Donald Trump did wear goggles because you never know when a flying face mask will come out of nowhere and strike you in the eyeball.

The officials at Honeywell weren’t required to wear masks either as everyone getting near Trump were required to take tests for the coronavirus. So, after the tests, they assume everyone’s in the clear. How long does it take for these tests to come in? Of course, after being near Trump, you may wanna be tested for mono, herpes, hepatitis C, etc.

During his visit, someone played the Guns N Roses version of Paul McCartney’s “Live and Let Die.” Jimmy Kimmel tweeted, “I can think of no better metaphor for this presidency than Donald Trump not wearing a face mask to a face mask factory while the song “Live and Let Die” blares in the background.”

I don’t know. The Trump campaign likes playing music like this at his hate rallies. And perhaps Drowning Pool refused to give them the rights to play “Let the Bodies hit the Floor.”

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Where’s Mike Pence?


cjones05032020

Where’s Mike Pence been? Yesterday, he was at the Mayo Clinic.

Pence, who leads the White House’s Coronavirus Task Force visited the clinic yesterday and violated their policy that everyone who enters has to wear a face mask. He also violated the guidelines of the…wait for it…White House’s Coronavirus Task Force. Is there really a task force or is it just as empty a gesture as Pence’s photo-op yesterday at the Mayo Clinic?

Why didn’t Pence wear a face mask? Does he think he’s better than everyone else? In a photo where he’s talking to doctors, staffers, and patients, he’s the only person not wearing a mask. Did he not wear one because Donald Trump doesn’t? Once, when Donald Trump moved a glass of water from the table to the floor, Pence quickly followed and did the exact same thing. Pence, who interrupts his own lies to praise the “leadership” of Donald Trump will one day have his photo in dictionaries for “sycophant.”

In a tweet, the Mayo Clinic said Pence and his staff were aware of the policy before they entered. That tweet has since been deleted.

Mike Pence defended his position with mind-boggling stupidity in an extremely pompous statement exhibiting his disrespect to the clinic and indifference to the seriousness of the situation. Mike Pence and Donald Trump have an extremely hard time faking empathy.

Pence said, “I didn’t wear a mask because President Trump doesn’t wear a mask, and I need to follow suit and appear like a tough guy as well. Wearing a mask will just undercut our argument to reopen the nation, which we’ve issued contradicting statements for, but yet our base is totally rabid about. Plus, Jesus will save me from the coronavirus…thanks to the leadership of President Trump. Also, there’s still a chance the coronavirus is a Democratic hoax, unlike gay cooties.”

OK, he didn’t actually say any of that except for the part about gay cooties. His reason for not wearing a mask is that he’s regularly tested and said, “Since I don’t have the coronavirus, I thought it’d be a good opportunity for me to be here, to be able to speak to these researchers, these incredible health-care personnel, and look them in the eye and say thank you.”

Yeah, just make sure you say it and don’t spray it, Mike.

There’s a lot to dissect here. First, with a free tip: If you enter a room full of doctors, doctors of such high standing that they work for the Mayo freaking Clinic, and they’re all wearing masks, put on a fucking mask, you selfish sycophantic moron. When you watch the movie Outbreak, you don’t see Dustin Hoffman maskless and petting the monkey. You don’t want to end up like Kevin Spacey, either the one in the movie or reality.

But the first thing that occurred to me and many others is…you don’t wear the mask over your eyes. I know, they’re Republicans and IF they do happen to be smart enough to know you wear the mask over your nose and mouth and NOT your eyeballs, they’re not intelligent enough to say something stupid like they didn’t wear a mask because they wanted to look people in the eye. When that future dictionary comes out, they can use the same photo for Pence under “Dumbass.”

While not wearing a mask to look people in the eyes is stupid, it’s outright dangerous to enter a medical facility without one.

Mike Pence defends himself by saying he’s “regularly tested.” Maybe his stupidity has been caused by the cotton swab being pushed too far up his nostril. But, while Pence is regularly tested, that doesn’t mean you’re immune. It doesn’t mean you can’t catch it between the test and entering the clinic…or at one of those stupid White House press conferences where everyone’s standing shoulder to shoulder and sharing one microphone. It also doesn’t mean you can’t catch it while crawling up Donald Trump’s ass.

Republicans are in a rush to open the nation back up for business because this economy is destroying Donald Trump’s reelection bid. Not wearing a mask in a photo-op hurts the argument that the virus will just disappear because if more people follow Trump and Pence’s lead, they won’t wear masks and the resurgence of the virus will be much stronger and quicker. Guess what happens then? We close the nation again and probably just in time for the November election. I bet Vice-President Elizabeth Warren will wear a mask.

Everyone needs to wear a mask when they go out. They also need to practice social distancing. Pence is doing neither in the photo. By not wearing a mask, Mike Pence endangered the entire clinic and not just any clinic. He endangered the Mayo Clinic.

CNN’s chief medical correspondent, Sanjay Gupta, said, “When you get a negative test, that is a point in time.”

Jonathan Reiner, a cardiologist who treated former vice president Richard B. Cheney, told CNN Pence’s actions were “so wrong, so tone-deaf.” He said, “The vice president wouldn’t disrespect a synagogue and not wear a skull cap when he walked into a temple or he wouldn’t refuse to remove his shoes when he walked into a mosque. Hospitals are our new holy places and he’s completely disrespecting the sacrifice that the nurses and the docs and the staff in hospitals make by not wearing a mask. What is he saying to them?” I don’t know, Pence might enter a synagogue without a skull cap or a mosque without…wait. Pence wouldn’t enter a mosque anymore than he’d visit the Tenderloin. Actually, that’s when he’d wear a mask.

What Mike Pence is saying to the staff at the Mayo Clinic is that he doesn’t give a fuck. Mike Pence promotes himself as a Christian and Jesus freak while serving a man who boasts about grabbing women by their “pussies.” He serves a man who’s cheated on all three of his wives and paid off porn stars and Playmates through dummy corporations. He serves a man who can’t say a sentence without a lie in it. Mike Pence ignores the Ten Commandments in favor of Trump’s Commandments. He is a phony and he’ll sell anything and anyone out for his ambitions. That includes his phony principles and the safety of everyone at the Mayo Clinic.

While Mike Pence may be looking them in their eyes saying “thank you,” the lack of a mask says, “I don’t really care about you, your patients, or all the work and sacrifices you’ve put in fighting this virus and saving lies.” What Mike Pence told the entire nation is, “I really don’t care, do you?”

Anand Swaminathan, a doctor, tweeted, “Not wearing a mask isn’t about being brave. It’s about being pompous, arrogant + self-absorbed. It’s anti-science. The mask isn’t to protect you. It’s to protect everyone else from you, VP. It’s clearly showing that he doesn’t care about anyone else.”

Do Mike Pence and Donald Trump believe people don’t need protection from them? Because guess what. This entire nation needs protection from Trump/Pence.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

MyPillow Facetime


cjones04042020

There’s been a lot of debates over whether the networks should broadcast Donald Trump’s daily press conferences on the coronavirus. While there is pertinent information provided with these conferences, the majority of the time, they’re just replacements for Donald Trump’s hate rallies where he and everyone else speaking praises Donald Trump. But one aspect there should not be any debate over is that these things don’t have to be infomercials for companies whose executives are Donald Trump campaign supporters.

Seriously, I don’t need to see a free commercial for MyPillow in the middle of the day on CNN, who thankfully cut away during his segment at the daily hate rally. Mike Lindell, the CEO of the pillow company, gets enough advertising on Laura Ingraham’s show (where he increased his advertising after other companies dropped out after she attacked school-shooting survivor David Hogg.

Lindell was at Trump’s Monday press conference because he says he’s donating 75% of his company to producing face masks and will soon be kicking out 50,000 a day. I’m not sure what he’s not being paid for this but I’m sure he’s not doing it for free. Lindell’s appearance with other executives was to bolster Trump’s argument that he doesn’t need the Defense Production Act to have companies help fight the coronavirus. But if the kind of people helping out is people like Mike Lindell, I’m not going to be enthusiastic.

Mike Lindell says he’s going to make 50,000 face masks a day. It’s not that I think Lindell is lying, but it’s not like I believe him either. Why wouldn’t I believe a fine, upstanding Christian who throws his Christianity in everyone’s face at every opportunity (Seriously. He did it at the press conference too). The reason I don’t believe Mr. Lindell is because he’s a Trump supporter.

First off, he praised Donald Trump’s response to the pandemic. That right there tells me he’s full of shit. Lindell has said Trump is the “the most amazing president this country has ever seen in history,” which he said before Trump was president. He’s a conman who settled a lawsuit with several California counties over false advertising that his hate pillow cures things it doesn’t cure. The Better Business Bureau gives his company an F rating for a scam it ran about where you buy one pillow and get another for free…which was actually just the regular price. It was basically: Pay the regular price twice and we’ll throw in another pillow. Old conservatives who watch commercials at 2:00 AM on Fox are real suckers for that kind of shit.

Lindell wrote an Op-Ed for the Duluth News-Tribune in 2018 stating, “After more than 500 days with Donald Trump as our president — with record-low unemployment and a booming economy — it’s clear, Minnesota, that we can rest easy.” Then, he laid off 150 people. Hey, MyPillow guy…how many people did you lay off during the Obama presidency?

Praising and supporting Donald Trump tells me you don’t care about honesty or that someone’s a pathological liar and a conman. When you do that it tells me you’re probably one yourself and nobody should ever purchase your products or go into business with you, especially the United States government at the behest of taxpayers. Mike Lindell is going to produce 50,000 face masks a day? I’ll believe it when it actually happens and it’s verified by a third party. On top of that, I want to see the contract. What are we, the taxpayers, paying for the MyPillow face masks? Hey, Mike. How about when you make 50,000, you give us 25,000 for free?

On another note, MyPillows has horrible ratings at Amazon. It’s a crap pillow that someone filled with chunks of foam that reviewers say makes a big crunching sound when you lay your head on it. Our medical professionals would probably be better off wearing Dr. Birx’s scarves than Mike Lindell’s face masks.

Mike Francesca, a New York sports disc jockey and a Donald Trump supporter, went after Trump for having Lindell at his press conference. He said, “Hospitals don’t have the supplies they need. So don’t give me the MyPillow guy doing a song and dance up here on a Monday afternoon when people are dying in Queens! Get the stuff made! Get the stuff where it needs to go and get the boots on the ground. Treat this like the crisis it is.”

The song and dance is exactly why Lindell was there. These daily briefings are more about praising Trump for doing a horrible job than they are about providing a nation in crisis with valuable information. And Lindell did exactly what Donald Trump wanted him to do, which was to go balls-deep with the sycophancy.

Lindell preached, “God gave us grace on November 8, 2016, to change the course we were on,” talking about the day Donald Trump was mistakenly elected. He continued, “God had been taken out of schools and lives. A nation had turned its back on God. I encourage you to use this time at home to get back in the Word, read our Bibles and spend time with our families. With our great president, vice president and this administration and all the great people in this country praying daily, we will get through this and get back to a place that’s stronger and safer than ever.” That’s some serious cult worship. Keep in mind, this guy smoked a lot of crack cocaine back in the day.

Many in the press mocked him, like MSNBC’s Ali Velshi who tweeted, “Trump just called the “My Pillow” guy up to the podium in the Rose Garden. You cannot make this stuff up.” Fox News’ Greg Gutfeld (who’s their idea of a funny guy) tweeted a reply, “When you start producing 50 thousand masks a day you can go up to the podium too In the meantime sit on your fence and keep your thumb up your ass.” See? Fox News funny. And again, don’t believe he’s going to produce 50,000 face masks a day just because they say he is. We’ve had three years of this. When will you start learning from experience?

Conservative radio host Larry O’Connor got upset and tweeted that the critics are “ungrateful jerks” and need to “STFU” about him. I really hope he sees this cartoon.

Logan Hall of the right-wing propaganda hate site wrote, “The MyPillow guy has done more to combat the spread of coronavirus than 99% of the blue checks whining about him.” Again, how do you know he’s done more and…what’s a blue check? Can I get one?

Lindell himself got upset over the criticism. Like Trump, he doesn’t believe he receives enough appreciation. He went on Fox News where Lou Dobbs played him a tape of MSNBC’s Chris Hayes saying, “Seems crazy that everyone’s still taking these briefings seriously when you have the MyPillow guy getting up there talking about reading the Bible.” Lindell replied, “I heard Jim Acosta attack me too, and he was 10 feet from me, in the Rose Garden. This is just evil, Lou. This is evil.” How far should one be from you before attacking so it’s not evil? But hey, 10 feet is better than 6 so you’re good.

He continued whining and supporting his cult with, “This president has been the best man in charge for such a time as this; it’s just those newscasters, those journalists, we know who they are… CNN, what they did to me, I’m sorry, I put on a message of hope to the country that God had given us grace in November of 2016, a nation that turned its back on God, and right now we’re part of this big revival.” Feel free to pause if you need to vomit. And again, praising Trump, grace from God, crack cocaine.

The MyPillow guy summed up with, “I am appalled by the journalists that I see there. I used to think that, they are not that evil, yes, they are.”

Wow. Maybe Mr. MyPillow guy will think I’m evil too after seeing this cartoon. Am I evil? Well if standing up for my nation against the attacks of Donald Trump and all those who are in his cult like the MyPillow guy, then as Diamond Head sang, “Yes, I am.”

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