Herschel Walker

Werewolves For Warnock

This morning, millions of people who care about democracy and the progressive direction of this nation woke up saying, “whew!” And millions of Georgians who didn’t want to be represented in the United States Senate by a hypocritical lying moron who resides in Texas said the same thing.

This morning, Republicans are wondering how they could have lost Georgia after working so hard to suppress the vote. Didn’t they change voting laws making it harder for black people to vote? Republicans even made it illegal to give bottles of water to people in voting lines that they made unnecessarily longer. So naturally, there will be accusations by Republicans and goons on Fox News that the election was stolen. And as usual, they won’t have any proof.

Republicans are at a loss as to how Georgia voters would reject a lying deadbeat dad in Herschel Walker who spent time on the campaign trail, when he wasn’t taking those five days off during the runoff, talking about how he’d rather be a werewolf than a vampire. Didn’t that fake police badge convince them he was legit?

Instead of supporting policies that appeal to a majority of voters, Republicans decided it’d be easier to change voting laws, thus making it harder for people to vote who support stuff other than tax cuts for billionaires and racism. Instead of putting up a solid candidate, Republicans decided to put up a famous name with an “R” beside it, believing that was good enough. They also thought selecting a black Republican would appeal to black voters in Georgia, which was insulting to believe that they’d ignore his policies or the bullshit that came out of his mouth.

Georgia Republicans believed that nominating a guy who ran well with a football back in the 1980s and was a hometown hero for Georgia, would put them over the top, never mind the fact he actually lived in Texas. In the final days of the campaign, Republicans were accepting that Walker was a terrible candidate and was telling voters to vote for him just because he was a Republican and that he would vote in the Senate the way white GOP overlords would tell him to vote. They may as well have come out and said Walker would pick their cotton.

Governor Brian Kemp refused to run with Walker or support him during the general election. He didn’t believe he could afford it. After he won in the general election, and in the last days of the run-off, he finally came out with an endorsement, not so much of Walker but for the Republican slot. Brian Kemp is a coward and what he was doing here was winning favors from the Republican establishment, especially with Mitch McConnell. Brian Kemp may run for the Senate someday. Let’s hope when that day comes and he runs against either Senator Jon Ossoff or Senator Raphael Warnock, that Georgia has gone further blue.

Republicans made sure to keep Trump out of the state during the general election and runoff even though he hand-picked Walker. Republicans know that whenever Donald Trump holds a rally for a candidate, that candidate typically loses. Donald Trump is a loser and now, so is Herschel Walker.

Maybe in the future, the Republican Party should choose candidates who are actually qualified. Running idiotic goons who can’t tell you the three branches of government might work in red states like Alabama, but not so much in states trending blue.

Republicans believed Raphael Warnock was a bad candidate for the Democratic Party. But why did they believe that? Have they never heard him speak? Did they not look at his record? It’ll be interesting to see where Raphael Warnock’s political career goes as he is an excellent candidate. Proof of that is, he won… in Georgia.

Creative note: I googled images of werewolves and vampires, mostly to see how they would dress. I do wish Google would stop throwing images at me of those Twilight vampires. I’m no expert, but those aren’t vampires.

Music note: I listened to Foo Fighters, Mumford and Sons, and Apple Music must have known what I was up to, because it threw a Vampire Weekend song at me. I don’t know anything by Vampire Weekend.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Secret Republican Abortion Club

Can you believe a second woman is now accusing Herschel Walker of paying for an abortion? I can. Do you know why I can believe it? Because he did it. This is like Donald Trump and accusations of sexual assault. Who are you going to believe, Trump or the 26 women accusing him? You can’t believe people when they have a long history and pattern of lying about everything.

Let’s look at just a few of the lies told by Herschel Walker, the current Republican candidate for Georgia’s senate seat.

Herschel Walker lied about being a cop. He was never ever a cop. Never.

Herschel Walker lied about being an FBI agent. He was never an FBI agent. He said he’s been to Quantico and his campaign said he had once run a “women’s self-defense training, participating in the FBI Academy at Quantico.”
It just occurred to me that I’m an FBI agent too. How is that? Years ago, I was a guest speaker at an FBI class at Quantico. It was a class for police from across the nation about the media. Since I spoke at a training thingamajig at the FBI Academy, that makes me an FBI agent, at least when I use Herschel’s logic. The ingrates at the academy never did send me my badge.

Herschel Walker lied about graduating from college in the top one percent.

Herschel Walker lied about graduating from college.

Herschel Walker lied about having a bachelor’s degree.

Walker lied about being the founder of a charity for veterans.

Walker lied that the veterans’ charity he didn’t found is a charity, but is actually a for-profit operation which he worked for as a spokesman and has been investigated by the Department of Justice and the FBI (probably the same FBI he never worked for) for being a con.
When I worked for a newspaper, I never claimed I started or owned the newspaper. Has Herschel claimed he owns the UGA Bulldogs, Dallas Cowboys, Minnesota Vikings, Philadelphia Eagles, or the New Jersey Generals? Of course not, because nobody wants to claim they owned the New Jersey Generals.

Herschel lied when he claimed his business, Herschel’s Famous 34 Food Products (this is really a thing) donated 15% of its profits to charity. One of the charities he claims he’s donated to refused to comment and three others said they have no record of donations from Herschel or his company.
Donald Trump did the same thing, except it was his own “charity” that he never donated to but claimed he did. Instead, Trump used his charity to buy gifts for himself, like signed sports objects and portraits of himself, and to coordinate with his 2016 presidential campaign. He also used it as a con for receiving payments. Like when he did that Wrestlemania, payment from WWE went into his charity instead of to him. That way, there were no taxes on the money and Trump got to use it to buy Tim Tebow’s balls.

Herschel lied when he claimed he owned the “largest” upholstery business in the country. He doesn’t just NOT own the largest, but Herschel doesn’t and has never owned an upholstery company. I can’t even tell you the reason for this ridiculous preposterous lie. There doesn’t seem to be any reason for it. It’s like when Trump claimed he was voted Michigan Man of the Year, which doesn’t exist.
I own a trailer park and it’s the largest trailer park in the world. It’s called Clay’s Famous Trailer Park. Don’t look it up. If you claim you looked it up but couldn’t find it, then you’re lying. See how that works?

Herschel lied when he said he was a quarter Native American and that his grandmother was a “full-blooded Cherokee”. Herschel’s own mother said that’s not true. Remember when Republicans mocked Elizabeth Warren for claiming she’s part Native American? Wouldn’t it be funny if it’s discovered Herschel is related to Elizabeth Warren? Liz probably wouldn’t find it funny.

Herschel lied when he said Trump won the 2020 election. When people say this bullshit, it’s not an opinion. It’s a lie. There are no facts to support this lie. Fact, fact, fuckity fact, fact.

Walker lied about how many children he has. Currently, we’re at four, three of whom he initially refused to acknowledge. We’re still not sure there are only four.

And of course, Herschel has lied about paying for abortions. The first accuser produced a receipt and a get-well card from Herschel. Now there’s a second accuser. Are both women lying and Herschel’s telling the truth? Herschel has not given us any reason to believe him about anything…ever.

Herschel, like all Republicans, is a lying hypocrite. If Georgians make Herschel their next senator, Herschel will vote to ban abortion nationwide, even though most Republicans are saying it’s a “states” issue. Yeah, they’ll abandon that as soon as they have the House and Senate.

And soon, the only abortions there will be exceptions for will be for women knocked up by Herschel Walker.

Music note: I listened to Talking Heads and Third Eye Blind while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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I Am Draw Cartoon

Did you watch the debate between Pennsylvania Senate candidates Democrat John Fetterman and Republican Mehmet Crudites Oz? Did you at least watch the highlights? If so, did you mute or turn away out of the sheer awkwardness of it all? I watched the highlights and I wanted to turn away. It was painful and uncomfortable for me.

Let’s face facts, my liberal friends. Fetterman didn’t come off well. Not only did he not sound well but he didn’t look good. Who’s responsible for putting Fetterman into a suit that made him look like Uncle Fester? I know he’s not a suit guy but the Democratic campaign could have done a lot better than picking something off the rack at Burlington Coat Factory. At the very least, they should have Men’s Wearhoused that shit.

Fetterman suffered from a stroke and had to do a live debate against a guy who has 20 years experience of selling snake oil on TV. The odds are tough enough for Fetterman.

The debate marked the first time voters were able to watch Fetterman unscripted on live television since his stroke in May, which was just days before the state’s primary. Fetterman relied on closed captioning during the debate so he could follow the conversation as he continues to recover from auditory and speech difficulties. Yes, Fetterman had a stroke which makes him suffer from these issues. What’s Donald Trump’s excuse. Oh my god. Did Donald Trump have a stroke and his administration hid it? He did have that secret trip to the hospital.

Fetterman had trouble communicating during the debate. He failed to complete sentences, stumbled over words, and there were long awkward pauses. All this may have distracted viewers from noticing the lying piece of crap that is Mehmet Oz, who mostly lives in a New Jersey mansion, bought a farm in Pennsylvania for the race, and is currently staying with his inlaws in PA.

Since Dr. Oz can’t seem to keep up with how many homes he owns when it was time to list them on financial disclosure forms, or he’s just flat-out lying, let me offer an assist. He owns the Pennsylvania farm, a mansion in New Jersey, a condo in New Jersey, two condos in Manhattan (one of which his sister is suing him over for stiffing her on rental income), a cattle ranch in Florida where he claims he hunts despite not having a hunting license (does he shoot his cows?), a mansion in Palm Beach, and three properties in Turkey, of which he’s still a citizen and says he’ll renounce if he wins. Oh, don’t do us any favors, Dr. Crudite. Additionally, his wife “technically” owns a mansion in Maine and a hotel in Ireland.

Several analysts said the debate proves Fetterman isn’t prepared to be a Senator and should instead focus on his health. They may be right, but voters should vote for him anyway. He’s improving and he’s better than Oz. A bag of flaming poo is better than Oz, who will vote to ban abortion nationwide. Sending Dr. Crudite to the Senate may give Republicans that 51st vote to ban abortion. And I assure you of this: If the GOP gains control of the Senate, they will do away with the filibuster to ban abortion.

During the debate, Oz sang and danced around answering direct questions about banning abortion, although it’s something he’s vowed in the past.

Republicans of course rejoiced at Fetterman’s performance because they’re evil twisted psychopathic fucks. They celebrated when Fetterman had his stroke. And to be honest, his campaign didn’t help matters by trying to bury the fact he had a stroke.

I’m mad at the Fetterman campaign. My problems extend beyond the crappy $35 suit they put the candidate in. They never should have put him on the debate stage. Normally, I want every race to have a debate, but this one served to give the wrong impression. If you read the transcripts and the points he made, Fetterman did OK. If you watch the debate, he did horribly.

Sure, the campaign would have been attacked for refusing to debate, but they should have weathered that. Again, they put him on stage against a slick con man with decades of TV experience and evil-sculpted eyebrows.

The people who are now attacking Fetterman for his difficulties communicating and expressing his thoughts ignore the cognitively challenged in their own party, from Marjorie Taylor Greene to Herschel Walker to Trump. My god, they sent racist Tommy Tuberville to the Senate and he doesn’t know the three branches of government. I’m not making that up.

These Republicans are not going to stop being uninformed stupid racist hacks, but John Fetterman’s cognitive abilities will improve. The fact he was able to perform on that stage last night should be applauded. And he didn’t whip out any props.

And that’s just it for the MAGA crowd. Herschel can whip out a badge and say “I am work with many police officers” and receive high praise while Fetterman struggles because of a stroke, and is accused of not being cognitively there.

The same people attacking Fetterman now want to reinstate the guy who said, “Person, woman, man, camera, TV.”

Music note: I listened to Toad the Wet Sprocket while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Honorary White Guys

White racists love having black friends. Having a black friend is their “proof” they’re not racists. They love being able to say something racist and having a black friend support them with a “that’s not racist.” A lot of black public figures have figured this out and have learned to profit from it. Candace Owens is a great example. She was a liberal until she figured out there was more money in being a public black friend. She also understands that white conservartives are too stupid to see through the ruse.

Having a black friend doesn’t prove you’re not a racist, but only conservatives are too dumb to realize that. How many slave owners had sex with their slaves? How many black women did Strom Thurmond father children with again? Oh, yeah. The people they slept with weren’t their friends.

There are some black conservatives who are not playing the white racist base for all it’s worth because they’re too stupid to do that. Some black conservatives are truly evil and vile.

Ya’ see, kids…concussions may be to blame for Herschel talking like a third-grade dropout. But I don’t believe it’s concussions that makes him lie repeatedly. I don’t think it’s concussions that made him a deadbeat dad. I don’t believe it’s concussions that make him “pro-life” while paying and coercing a woman to get an abortion. I don’t believe it’s concussions that makes him a hypocrite. I don’t believe it’s concussions that make him claim he’s a cop when he’s not. And, I don’t believe it’s concussions that makes him a wife beater.

It may be a mental illness that makes Kanye West a Trump supporters. It may be the fault of mental illness that makes anyone a Trump supporter. Trump himself is probably mentally ill. But it’s not the fault of mental illness that makes Kanye antisemitic.

Twitter and Instagram locked Kanye’s account after he tweeted that Sean “Puffy” Combs was controlled by Jews and vowed to go “death con 3” on “JEWISH PEOPLE.”

Then, Kanye did an interview with Tucker Carlson that was so hateful, bigoted, and antisemitic, that Tucker edited out huge chunks of the interview. How fucking hateful do you have to be for Tucker to edit your shit? It’s like that time antisemitic propagandist Ben Garrison was invited for a playdate with Trump at the White House, then disinvited after the Trump people saw his “cartoons.”

In one of the edited out clips, West said “known eugenics” Margaret Sanger founded Planned Parenthood alongside the Ku Klux Klan “to control the Jew population,” elaborating, “when I say Jew, I mean the 12 lost tribes of Judah, the blood of Christ, who the people known as the race Black really are. This is who our people are. The blood of Christ. This, as a Christian, is my belief.”

In another clip, West used Jews as a strained metaphor when talking about Black people judging each other, saying: “Think about us judging each other on how white we could talk would be like, you know, a Jewish person judging another Jewish person on how good they danced or something.” West then paused and said “I mean, that’s probably like a bad example and people are going to get mad at that shit. I probably want to edit that out.” And Tucker edited it out, or at least his people did.

Real journalists don’t protect the people they’re interviewing. When you do an interview, nothing is off the record. Here, Tucker protected Kanye from himself.

And then, West West complained about his children attending a school that celebrates Kwanzaa instead of Hanukkah. “I prefer my kids knew Hanukkah than Kwanzaa. At least it will come with some financial engineering.”

Candace Owens defended Kanye’s tweet, saying, “If you are an honest person, you did not think this tweet was antisemitic. It’s like you cannot even say the word ‘Jewish’ without people getting upset.”

Golly gee wilikers. It’s like you cannot even say “I’m gonna go ‘death con 3 on JEWISH PEOPLE” without people getting upset.

Maybe Candace and Kanye need Jewish friends to back up their up their antisemitic comments as not being antisemitic. They should probably rule out Ben Shapiro though.

Shapiro tweeted, “Back from the Jewish holiday now. As usual, two things can be true at once: Kanye’s moves toward pro-life, faith, and family conservatism are encouraging; his ‘death con 3’ posts and Black Hebrew Israelite language are clearly anti-Semitic and disturbing.”

Kanye then called Donald Trump for antisemitc encouragement. Trump recently “truthed” that American Jews didn’t appreciate him enough, that he’s done more for Jews than any other president, and that he could be elected Prime Minister of Israel if he wanted.

Kanye and Trump plan to have dinner soon where they can discuss their shared views and Jewish People and whether it’s better to create your own hate social media site, like Trump did with Truth Social, or buy one like Kanye plans to do with Parler.

Parler is a vile horrible site for conservatives. It has been pushed off Google and Amazon platforms and servers over its hate and tendency to spread conspiracy theories. But it’s credible enough to attract public conservative figures like Kirstie Alley, Scott Baio, Rand Paul, South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem, Jim Jordan, Devin Nunes, Nikki Haley, Mike Lee, and Ivanka Trump, Eric Trump, Tiffany Trump, Lara Trump, and Rudy Giuliani. Fake news sites like The Daily Wire has a Parler presence. Now, Kanye wants to purchase the platform. He plans to make it the right-wing Twitter which Trump has attempted to do with Truth Social and Elon Musk plans to do with the real Twitter.

Kanye and Herschel are MAGAts black friends. But I wouldn’t want to be friends with Kanye, Herschel, or MAGAts. You know what they say. With friends like these, who needs friends?

Update: My friend Karen just told me that Candace Owens’ husband, George Farmer, owns Parler and has agreed to sell it to Kanye. That explains why she doesn’t think going “death con 3” on “JEWISH PEOPLE” is hateful or antisemitic.

Creative note and stuff: I checked out of my hotel at 11 a.m. Monday morning in West Monroe, Louisiana. But my flight was for 5:30 p.m. Since I didn’t have anywhere to go and didn’t want to Uber more than I had to, I hung out in the airport for six hours. I landed in Washington around 11 p.m. and took the metro to a station closer to the Amtrak station and took an Uber from there. I should have either metroed to Springfield and ordered an Uber home from there.

See, what happened was: I got to the Amtrak station and realized it wasn’t open 24 hours. My plan was to hang out there until my train left at 7:38 a.m. I had already bought a ticket which was only $11. But, standing out in the chilly weather with a phone on about 20 percent charge convinced me to say “fuck it,” and order another Uber and go home. It was around $85 and worth it. I got home around 1 a.m. All I had eaten Monday was some leftover Johnny’s Pizza from Sunday, and chips they give you on airplanes. So I scarfed down a can of Chef Boyardee and played on the internet until 4 a.m. because I was too wound up to sleep, even though I was sleepy. And it was during this time this idea came to me.

It was good to draw back at my own desk after nearly two weeks of traveling. Oh, yeah. I gotta go out of town again Saturday, but that’s just for a day.

Oh yeah: Facebook pulled this cartoon for “violating” its terms of service. I appealed and lost. My account is now blocked for three days which will also limit views of my work for a while after I return. I thought at least one social media account would strike down this cartoon. Now I wonder if any others will follow suit. Maybe I should have posted this on Parler. I did post it on Truth Social. Let’s see what happens there.

Music Note: I listened to The Cars.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Officer Cracker Jack

Georgia Senator Raphael Warnock and former football great, deadbeat dad, abortion provider, occasional wife beater, serial liar, non-Cherokee, and never-ever-been-a-cop Hershel Walker had a debate last night in Savannah, Georgia. It’s likely to be their only debate.

Herschel Walker is being lavished with praise for being coherent for most of the night. Most of the night. The bar for Herschel was so low that he could say diabetics need to “eat right” instead of taking insulin, and flash a fake police badge, change his position on abortion, and still receive praise for being able to stand up straight for most of the night. Republicans are counting this as a win. They’re probably just happy he didn’t repeat that story about the bull and three pregnant cows.

Walker is an opponent of abortion despite the fact he paid for one and tried to coerce the same woman to have another. He’s also a big supporter of the police despite threatening to have a shoot-out with them once.

Walker went from a position of being opposed to all abortions, even in the case of rape, incest, or when the mother’s life is in danger, to being OK with abortions in those instances. He also flipped from saying Trump won the 2020 election to saying Biden won, though he didn’t say Biden won legitimately or that Trump lost.

Walker chastised Warnock for scrutinizing police and claiming that Warnock alone has demoralized police and is fully responsible for lower recruitment. Warnock shot back and destroyed Walker with his response.

Warnock pointed out that you can support police while still scrutinizing them, like you can with all professions. Based upon GOP logic, you don’t support the medical community if you get a breast implant when you actually went to the hospital to get your tonsils out, and you have some criticism over it. A real supporter would accept the botched procedure and be grateful for looking firm and perky.

After explaining reason and logic to Walker, that you can support police while criticizing them, Warnock took the lying abortion providing hypocrite down. Warnock said, “One thing I have not done: I have never pretended to be a police officer. And I’ve never threatened a shootout with the police.”

Walker responded by pulling a black wallet from his suit jacket pocket, which held a five-pointed gold badge, saying, “You know what’s so funny? I am work [sic] with many police officers.”

If you’re a Georgia voter, you need to say, “I am not vote for Herschel Walker.”

One of the two debate moderators, WSAV news anchor Tina Tyus-Shaw, admonished Walker saying, “You have a prop. That is not allowed, sir.”

Walker replied, “Well, it’s not a prop. This is real.” No, Hershel, it’s a prop. Even if it was real, in this setting, it would still be a prop. This man is clearly not qualified mentally to be a United States Senator.

Walker has made many unfounded claims that he has “worked in law enforcement.” Herschel Walker lies about working with police like he lies about how many kids he has, or how many abortions he’s paid for, or what race he’s a member of. Yes, the man has lied about being Native American.

I’m positive that all those Republicans who piled on Elizabeth Warren’s claim of being Native American will ignore Herschel’s bullshit that he’s a quarter Cherokee, which is own mother has refuted.

Don’t forget Herschel Walker has lied about graduating at the top of his class from the University of Georgia despite the fact he never graduated.

At one point, Senator Warnock said, “I think (Walker) should tell the people of Georgia why he thinks they should have expensive insulin and why the pharmaceutical companies should be able to charge us whatever they like.”

Walker replied with, “I believe in reducing insulin, but at the same time you got to eat right. Because he may not know and I know many people that’s on insulin, and unless you have eating right, insulin is doing you no good.” Walker went on to say, “ You have to get food prices down and you got to get gas down so that they can go get insulin.”

What to the what to the fucking what? Insulin doesn’t do no good unless you have eating right, but get the food prices down and the gas down, and then you can have insulin? And people think Herschel won this debate?

Excuse, but how do you say stupid-ass shit like “insulin is doing you no good if you don’t have eating right,” and win a debate? You don’t.

Herschel Walker is a liar, a hypocrite, a deadbeat dad, and a wife beater. He’s a insane, stupid, and evil. Georgia can NOT put this man in the Senate.

A real cop with a real badge should arrest the Republicans responsible for making this lying lunatic their candidate.

Creative note: Still drawing in Louisiana.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Ye For Herschel

yeah

I apologize for just now posting this cartoon on the website. I started this cartoon around 4:30 am today at the Fredericksburg train station. I continued to work on it on the Virginia Railway Express (a commuter train). I didn’t get much done there as it was shaky. After checking in and getting to my gate at DCA (the Washington, D.C. airport that’s not Dulles). I finished the cartoon during my layover in Atlanta and was able to post it there to Facebook and Twitter.

I had to go to a lawyer’s office and sign some papers regarding my brother’s estate. Next, I am meeting an old friend who I haven’t seen in over 20 years. So once again, I owe you a better blog.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Herschel’s Privates

I actually heard a Republican make this argument on TV a few days ago. If Herschel Walker encouraged a girlfriend to get an abortion, or even paid for it, why that’s his personal life and we should respect his privacy. Seriously?

Herschel Walker is a lying hypocrite…and so is the entire Republican establishment.

Someone said you can nominate Satan and if he’s running against a Democrat, Republicans will vote for him. Their logic is that despite who and what he is, he’ll vote and give them what they want, which is a total nationwide ban on abortions. This makes them hypocrites and liars since they used to argue abortion is a state issue.

Republicans have already proven they’ll vote for the vilest horrendously flawed human beings to get what they want. Case in point: Donald Trump. Trump proved Republicans are liars when it comes to family values, patriotism, democracy, and fiscal conservatism. They voted for the most disgusting shitweasel on the planet and sacrificed all their principles for a Supreme Court majority, which is also made up of lying hypocritical disgusting fundamentalist shitweasels.

Herschel Walker isn’t qualified to be a United States Senator, which makes him the perfect candidate for the Republican Party, because Republicans are unqualified to lead and govern this nation. They’re also lying hypocrites.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Running with the Walkers

The devil went down to Georgia and he was looking for a soul to steal, but he wasn’t looking to pay for an abortion while claiming he’s “pro-life,” and then lie about it later.

Former University of Georgia, NFL, and USFL running back Herschel Walker is proof that you can’t let Donald Trump choose your candidates. Thanks to Trump’s endorsement, Republicans may fail to retake the Senate because they’re likely to lose Georgia. I mean, they should lose because they nominated a very uniquely unqualified candidate.

Herschel Walker isn’t just stupid, but he’s also a liar and he’s evil. Granted, evil liars are pretty much all the GOP goes for nowadays but most of them can form coherent sentences.

Walker wants to ban abortion entirely. He doesn’t want any exceptions for rape, incest, or if the mother’s life is in danger. He compares abortion to murder. So, if it’s murder and Walker has principles, then why did he pay for a former girlfriend’s abortion?

Walker says he didn’t, yet a woman who asked not to be identified out of privacy concerns told The Daily Beast that after she and Walker conceived a child while they were dating in 2009, he urged her to get an abortion. The woman said she had the procedure and Walker reimbursed her for it.

From The Daily Beast: She supported these claims with a $575 receipt from the abortion clinic, a “get well” card from Walker, and a bank deposit receipt that included an image of a signed $700 personal check from Walker.

The woman said there was a $125 difference because she “ball-parked” the cost of an abortion after Googling the procedure and added on expenses such as travel and recovery costs.

Additionally, The Daily Beast independently corroborated details of the woman’s claims with a close friend she told at the time and who, according to the woman and the friend, took care of her in the days after the procedure.

The woman said Walker, who was not married at the time, told her it would be more convenient to terminate the pregnancy, saying it was “not the right time” for him to have a child. It was a feeling she shared, but what she didn’t know was that Walker had an out-of-wedlock child with another woman earlier that same year.

Asked if Walker ever expressed regret for the decision, the woman said Walker never had. Asked why she came forward, the woman pointed to Walker’s hardline anti-abortion position.

“I just can’t with the hypocrisy anymore,” she said. “We all deserve better.”

Walker says he never asked or told anyone to get an abortion and that he never paid for one. But this is the same guy who can’t remember how many kids he has, so how are we to believe him when he says he can’t remember how many abortions he never paid for?

Republicans are lying hypocrites. And if you don’t want to take my word for it, then take it from Christian Walker, Herschel Walker’s son. Christian is one of his kids that Herschel does remember.

Christian has been making videos attacking his father and his campaign.

Christian spills the dirt on his dad in one video, saying, “Family values, people? He has four kids, four different women, wasn’t in the house raising one of them. He was out having sex with other women. Do you care about family values?” After the abortion story dropped, Christian tweeted a new video where he says, “I was silent, lie, after lie, after lie. The abortion part drops yesterday, it’s literally his handwriting in the card, they say they have receipts, whatever. He gets on Twitter, he lies about it. OK, I’m done. Done. Everything has been a lie.”

Christian also tweeted, “I know my mom and I would really appreciate if my father Herschel Walker stopped lying and making a mockery of us. You’re not a ‘family man’ when you left us to bang a bunch of women, threatened to kill us, and had us move over 6 times in 6 months running from your violence.”

And in another tweet, “I don’t care about someone who has a bad past and takes accountability. But how DARE YOU LIE and act as though you’re some ‘moral, Christian, upright man.’ You’ve lived a life of DESTROYING other peoples lives. How dare you.”

Christian, who is a Republican social media “influencer,” is the 23-year-old son of Walker and Cindy DeAngelis Grossman, who are no longer married. Grossman has accused Walker of pointing a gun at her head. She described his abuse in an ad by the Republican Accountability Project PAC, saying, “His eyes would become very evil … The guns and knives. I got into a few choking things with him. The first time he held the gun to my head, he held the gun to my temple and said he was gonna blow my brains out.”

In 2005, four years after their divorce, Grossman went to court to get a protective order against Herschel Walker because he was threatening to murder her and her boyfriend.

None of this will matter to Republican voters, so let’s hope Georgia Independents refuse to vote for this mentally unstable evil abusive lying hypocrite.

This information about how violent, abusive, and hypocritical Walker is shouldn’t be necessary to defeat him, because he’s a horrible candidate. He’s not qualified for the job. But it is needed because this race is in Georgia.

Please, Georgia…we already have one lunatic from your state in Congress. Please don’t send another.

Note for the regulars: I’m going to Ohio this week for the usually-annual convention of the Association of American Editorial Cartoonists. For you, that means some or all of the blogs will be shorter than usual between tomorrow and Monday. Please try to survive.

Music note: I listened to Jet, Jesus Jones, Jimmie’s Chicken Shack, and Jefferson Airplane (I was in the J’s).

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

87,000 Conspiracy Theories

Sometimes I’m asked by people in the real world (like in person and not on social media), “why are you a liberal?”. I’ll also occasionally get, “Why can’t you be conservative?”.

The reason I’m a liberal and I can’t be a conservative is for several reasons. I don’t think cruelty is funny. I have empathy. I care about people who are not myself. I believe we should help each other, and not just ourselves. I don’t think we should be greedy and selfish. I don’t think we should physically hurt people. I believe in democracy and human rights. I believe all people should be treated equally and we should all have the same opportunities. I don’t believe that any child in this country should be allowed to go hungry. I believe in a woman’s right to choose. I don’t believe ten-year-old rape victims should be forced to give birth to rapists’ babies. I don’t believe families should be torn apart or that children should be thrown into dog crates. I like dogs. And, I like the truth.

Republicans can not tell the truth. They can’t advocate any policy without lying. Your average Republican will lie when he says America favors GOP policies over those of Democrats. That’s a huge lie since Republicans have only won the popular vote in a presidential election just once since 1988. In case you’re a Republican, that’s over 30 years. But, the lying gets worse when it comes to defending Donald Trump. I have never ever ever ever ever not once ever heard a MAGAt defend Donald Trump without lying. Never.

I guess what this boils down to is that I can’t be a Republican because I have principles. Republicans don’t have any. Look at Ted Cruz. The issues Republicans can’t claim to hold dear to their hearts anymore are many and include family values, balanced budgets, government spending, patriotism, Jesus, law and order, democracy, national security, corruption, nepotism, sexual assault, classified information, Hillary’s emails, or whatever the fuck is on Hunter Biden’s laptop. They have sacrificed every position they’ve ever held in loyalty to the Trump cult. This brings us back to lying.

The Inflation Reduction Act President Biden just signed tackles healthcare, climate change, and slightly raises taxes on corporations. The only way Republicans can attack this is to lie. If nothing else, maybe it’ll distract midterm voters from the fact Republicans blocked an amendment on a price cap of $35 on insulin. Another reason I can’t be a conservative is that I’m not fucking evil.

One of the lies they’re spreading is that this new law raises taxes on the middle class. It does not and there’s nothing in the bill that says so. Yet, Republicans are going on TV saying it does. Many justify this bullshit by claiming if you raise taxes on corporations, then they’ll raise prices on goods, which is like a tax increase on the middle class. These are the same motherfuckers who refused to see that American consumers pay tariffs when you raise them on foreign products.

But you can’t blame Democrats for greedy corporations raising their prices. You blame greedy corporations. I mean, why were they raising prices before this act passed? Did oil companies eat higher costs over the past several months instead of raising prices on consumers? No. Who are you going to blame for that, Joe Biden? Wait…Republicans did blame Joe Biden.

Another huge lie, which is a doozy, is that the new law will create 87,000 gun-toting IRS agents to go after the middle class with audits. This is a huge lie.

The legislation includes roughly $79 billion for the IRS over 10 years. In case you’re a Republican, ten years is a decade. The nonpartisan Congressional Budget Office projects that the enhanced IRS enforcement funded by the law will generate an additional $204 billion in revenue over 10 years. That represents additional taxes that are owed under existing laws, but which go unpaid.

Not all of the new hires, which won’t amount to 87,000, will be auditors. And increased revenue won’t come from people making less than $400,000. In case you’re a Republican, making $400,000 a year makes you way above middle class.

Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen has directed IRS Commissioner Charles Rettig not to use the new funding to increase enforcement of taxpayers earning less than $400,000. In case you’re a Republican, the IRS is a division of the Treasury Department.

Yellen said, “Specifically, I direct that any additional resources, including any new personnel or auditors that are hired, shall not be used to increase the share of small businesses or households below the $400,000 threshold that are audited relative to historical levels.” Yellen wrote in an August 10 letter to Rettig, “This means that, contrary to the misinformation from opponents of this legislation, small business or households earning $400,000 per year or less will not see an increase in the chances that they are audited.”

That doesn’t stop goons from gooning. Ted Cruz claimed “87,000 new IRS agents” will be going after small businesses and non-rich Americans. Cruz said, “And, by the way, these IRS agents aren’t there to go after billionaires. They’re there to go after you. They’re there to go after your small business.”

Maybe we can tax creepiness.

Ted Cruz has no resources for this claim. He just made it up. Speaking of troglodytes talking out of their asses, let’s see what Matt Gaetz had to say.

Gaetz said it was “bizarre” that the IRS bought $700,000 worth of ammunition between March and June 1 of this year, but that amount is the same amount the IRS spent on ammo during the Trump years. Gaetz believes the IRS is buying up all the ammunition it can so normal people won’t have any for when the IRS comes at them with guns blazing during audits.

Personally, I think we should tax people by the size of their foreheads. Fortunately for Matt, I don’t think his income during his upcoming time in prison will be enough to warrant an audit.

That brings us to the lie that there will be 87,000 armed IRS agents. 87,000 is the amount allowed over the next decade for the IRS to hire. It doesn’t mean they will hire that many. They’re not all going to be agents. And, only “special agents” who investigate criminal violations of the tax code are authorized to carry firearms.

And the official Twitter account for the House Judiciary Committee Republicans tweeted, “The IRS is coming for you. The DOJ is coming for you. The FBI is coming for you. No one is safe from political punishment in Joe Biden’s America.”

If you get audited, it doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that Donald Trump is a criminal who stole government classified documents. The IRS has nothing to do with FBI warrants and searches. But it’s probably true that if you steal classified government documents and store them in your laundry room next to your Swiffer, the DOJ might be coming for you.

The money the IRS is getting is for updates. Over the past decade, the IRS has lost 40 percent of its “complex revenue agents.” These are agents who handle complicated tax returns of large businesses and corporations and go after high-end tax evaders. Over the past decade, Republicans have cut IRS funding. Over the next five years, the IRS is expecting to lose up to 52,000 employees to attrition. This new funding will replace much of that.

The new hires will be educated people who can do math and were educated with the proper textbooks. So, very few will be coming from Florida or Texas.

If the IRS was receiving funds to go after the middle class with no plans to go after rich tax evaders, then Republicans would probably be silent over it. In fact, that’s probably what we’ll get if they take back Congress this November.

The fact is, Republicans care more about the rich than the middle class. Donald Trump’s only legislative accomplishment was giving himself and other asshole billionaires “permanent” tax cuts. They gave them to the middle class too to show they care…but those tax cuts were NOT permanent.

Anytime Republicans claim they care about you, it’s just another lie. And when they send out people like Ted Cruz and Matt Gaetz to state their positions, then you know they’re lying. But then again, it’s hard to find non-goons in the GOP.

The Republican Party lies because it’s all they have.

Music note: I listened to Radiohead.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Herschel Walker Word Salads

I kinda feel a little bad about this because political cartoonists are supposed to punch up, not down, and there is a very strong possibility that Herschel Walker has some serious brain damage.

It’s hard to tell if the Republican nominee for one of Georgia’s U.S. Senate seats has brain damage or is just your average run-of-the-mill moron. I mean, he is a Trump-supporting Republican and as we know, thems isn’t always the smartest of peoples. But, you can make a strong case for brain damage because it would usually take several blows to the head to make a black person vote Republican.

At the very least, this isn’t my fault. I’m not the one who put him into a position he’s not qualified for. Donald Trump and Republicans did that. If they had any humanity, they should have chosen someone else and saved Herschel for all the black friend photo-ops, like that Blacks-for-Trump guy who lives in a car that you see positioned behind Trump at every MAGA hate rally.

And Herschel is unqualified. Nobody can truly believe he’s qualified to be a United States senator after hearing his argument against the Green New Deal when he said, “Since we don’t control the air our good air decided to float over to China’s bad air so when China gets our good air, their bad air got to move. So it moves over to our good air space. Then now we got we to clean that back up.”

Or, when he said COVID was “created by China” and nobody talks about it because “everybody wants to play footsie with China.”

Or, when he talked about how to end school shootings saying, “Cain killed Abel and that’s a problem that we have. What we need to do is look into how we can stop those things. You know, you talked about doing a disinformation — what about getting a department that can look at young men that’s looking at women that’s looking at their social media. What about doing that? Looking into things like that and we can stop that that way. But yet they want to just continue to talk about taking away your constitutional rights. And I think there’s more things we need to look into. This has been happening for years and the way we stop it is putting money into the mental health field, by putting money into other departments rather than departments that want to take away your rights.”

It was not my intention to give you a migraine by forcing you to read that.

During an interview with Ben Carson and a contest for the dumbest person in the room, Herschel was asked, “what do you see as some of the biggest problems going on in our country today?”

Herschel didn’t say it was Climate Change, racism, the economy, COVID, the national debt, socialist Democrats, illegal immigration, election fraud, wokeness, or even Hunter Biden’s laptop. Herchel blamed celebrities.

Herschel said, “I think some of the biggest problems going on in our country today, we have so many celebrities telling people that they can’t do it. Telling a lot of people, ‘oh, well, you got to feel bad for yourself, feel sorry for yourself’ Which is sad to me. They’ve done it, but they’re telling you you can’t do it. And it’s like, you did it, why they can’t do it? I think they tell all the kids they can’t do it, making our kids feel sorry for themselves.”

How’s that migraine?

During that interview, Dr. Ben Carson, a brain surgeon, maybe should have given Herschel a checkup.

Now I believe the Dallas Cowboys weren’t just trying to improve their team when they traded Herschel Walker to the Minnesota Vikings in what many consider the most lopsided football trade in history. They were probably getting migraines from his word salads, so they sent them to the Vikings. The Vikings gave up five players and six future draft picks, from which the Cowboys built a Super Bowl dynasty. Walker wasn’t the missing piece the Vikings thought he was and departed for Philadelphia after two and a half seasons.

Walker might be the best running back in college football history. If you combine his rushing yards from the USFL and NFL, he’s the 7th all-time rushing leader. If you combine his all-purpose yards (rushing, receiving, returning), he’s first. Additionally, he’s a fifth-degree black belt, had two mixed-martial-arts fights, competed in the Olympics on the U.S. bobsled team, and even took a turn at ballet. He’s an athletic dude. At 60, he can probably still beat you in a footrace, but he shouldn’t be running for political office.

Herschel played football when nobody paid any attention to concussions. We’ll never know how many Walker got in his career but judging by the words that come out of his mouth, it was a lot. Jim McMahon, who played on the same team as Walker for a couple of seasons, played through at least five concussions. McMahon was probably the only one counting. Nobody was counting for Herschel.

I used to feel a little sad for Herschel Walker because he was never a huge success in the NFL but other teams won Super Bowls on his skills by trading him. He left college early for the USFL, a league that paid him a lot of money but that went nowhere. Who owned the team he played for in the USFL? Donald Trump owned the New Jersey Generals who Walker played for.

The very first person who took advantage of Herschel Walker out of college was Donald Trump. And today, Donald Trump is still doing it. It’s just too bad that Herschel isn’t smart enough to realize it. He’s not smart enough to know when he’s being used by people who normally wouldn’t have any use for his type.

Who is qualified to serve in the Senate is Raphael Warnock, Walker’s Democratic opponent. If Georgia truly wants qualified representation in the Senate, they’ll vote for Warnock. If they want a celebrity who’s not smart enough to do the job, they’ll vote for Walker.

Music note: I listened to Jets To Brazil while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: