Caption Contest #211 Winner


Reblogged from

This week’s winner is Eva Perry of Hartwood.

Runner up is Emma Brooks of Spotsylvania who submitted ”I fight as a lightweight…………intellectually, that is….”

Other runner ups are:  John Jones of Gordonsville who submitted “I owe America a global apology…my kids are even trashier than I am…”

Ray Semrad of Parsons, Kansas who submitted “Isis, Putin don’t you know who she is!!!”

Kathy Mannix of Washington, D.C. who submitted “I’m so over hockey moms. Now it’s bar brawlin’ grannies!!”

Peter Pfotenhauer of Fredericksburg who submitted “Wolf Cage Match.”

Bentley Carlyle of Spotsylvania who submitted “I guess a family can’t have a private drunken brawl without the lame stream media sticking their noses in……”

About these ads

You Too?



Six days ago the rock band U2 released their new album, Songs Of Innocence, and in a partnership with Apple, dumped the apple on over 500 million iTunes accounts.

One way to look at it is “Wow!  I got U2’s new album for free.  Thank you, Apple!  Thank you, U2.”  Yeah, you got something for free you didn’t even ask for.  How about that?

Another way to look at it is “how freaking presumptuous are you, U2?”

Several months ago I was at a restaurant and someone who worked at a very popular tattoo parlor in town put a bumper sticker for their establishment on my car.  They felt their place was so cool I should have been grateful for the free gift on my rear window.  Never mind the fact I didn’t ask for it.  Yeah, I could just scratch it off, but I wasn’t looking for a new chore of scratching their advertisement off my car.

That’s kinda the same way with this U2 and Apple spam dump.  If you don’t want it then you can simple hide it from your iTunes account (apparently it can’t be deleted) and if you’re not careful you might hit some sort of order thingy in the process and end up buying songs you don’t want.  I don’t know how it technically works as I don’t have an iTunes account.  I still manually place CDs into a CD player….all while dragging my knuckles.

It’s a shame U2 has to be such pretentious pricks.  They assume everyone wants their album.  They used to be a rebel sort of band.  Now they’re totally corporate and spamming all of civilization with music that I’m pretty sure is going to suck as they haven’t released a good song since the early 90’s.

Did I mention they’re pretentious?  On their last tour they hit the road with a huge stage monstrosity they dubbed “the claw.”  They used three of these 167 feet tall monsters (so they could set up in other cities while playing) and it took 120 trucks to cart it around.  They stated at the end of the 210 dates tour that they would donate each of the three Claws to different cities to become permanent structures because who doesn’t want a U2 memorial in their city?

OK, so they’re not as bad as Hitler.  They’re just making music I don’t like and forcing it on people.  As a musician I find the band’s destroying the economic structure for newer bands more troubling.  U2 doesn’t have to sell albums, CDs or downloads anymore (obviously).  They make most of their money touring.  A new band needs every cent and exposure they can get.  Who’s going to buy music if it’s given away?  A new band you have never heard of can’t afford to give it away.

Bono is a very charitable individual.  I’ll give him that.  His band made great music a long time ago.  They present themselves as working toward what’s best for everyone.  In this case they’re only doing what’s best for U2 while it destroys potential music careers for others.



Clay Invades Utah


I have clients all over the country.  I’m not trying to brag too much.  I also lose clients all over the country (you’re too liberal!!!).  I lost one this week in Tennessee.  I also picked up papers in Indianapolis, Wyoming, California and Washington.  I get excited about each one.  I’m also excited about picking up a paper in Utah, The Independent in St. George, Utah.  I did a little googling and it’s in Southern Utah and it’s really pretty.  Lots of red rocks.

I have an ex girlfriend in Utah who’s been asking me when will I have a client in Utah.  I didn’t hold out hopes.  My cartoons, while running in a few red states and even a few conservative papers, don’t really latch on.  I’ve lost two clients in Texas and I’m probably about to lose a third.

This paper in Utah is a little different.  It’s a college town and they even ran a small feature about adding me to their lineup.  Well they haven’t seen anything like me before.  We’ll see where they stand after two months of hate mail from angry Mormons.

Why is my Cliven Bundy Ranch cartoon posted here?  The editor at The Independent asked if I had anything that covered Southern Utah.  I was thinking “right.  I’m gonna cover a Utah issue.”  Then I remembered my ex (a lovely woman who got smart and married someone else) mentioning to me when the cartoon originally ran how readers in her state thought of it was a regional issue.  So I sent that.

I’m posting this today to ask my readers, you, to click their link.  The Independent.  Show them that there’s a fan base for my cartoons.  This is where all you Daily Kos readers, Twitter and Facebook friends can come in and make an impact.

Check out the new client.  I may be doing some exclusive cartoons for them in the future.  Now if all my clients ran a little feature about me I’d create blog posts for them too.  I already share every link I can find carrying my cartoons so I can give a little support to those sites.

Watching Goodell


We just finished the second week of the regular season and we’ve had two cases of domestic violence and one case of child abuse.  In other news my fantasy team is imploding.  Of course the team I played this week’s had a defense that scored 33 points.  Defenses don’t score 33 points in fantasy football.  Sheesh.

Back in the real word, I don’t expect Goodell to be fired.  He has 32 bossed, very rich bosses.  If they’re not trying to get rid of him then he won’t be fired.  Of course public pressure might hit the guy for his mishandling of the Ray Rice situation, among others.  If you’ve betting in Vegas you’ll want to take the odds on him resigning.

Thankfully for my career I’m much better at predicting what will happen in politics and culture than I am in predicting who will score a lot of points in fantasy football.

Be warned.  There will probably be future rants about my crappy fantasy football team over the next 15 weeks.

I’ve heard a lot about the new Apple watch.  Saying I’ve heard a lot about it doesn’t mean I’ve read a lot about it.  I’m really not interested in new gadgets.  I have a smart phone and yes, I Facebook and Twitter on it.  Mostly that’s to shamelessly promote my work.  I do use email on my phone a lot.  I’ve found that to be a life saver.  But using a gadget for the sheer entertainment value isn’t much interest to me.  I don’t have music or games on my phone….well, except for one crappy app for fantasy football.