War On Women

Accusers Get Verified


cjones10172016

Donald Trump brought his locker room talk to his rallies this week.

First he called his accusers “horrible,” “sick” and “phony,” and then he insinuated they’re not attractive enough for him to violate. What a moral and upstanding defense.

Regarding Jessica Leeds, who has accused Trump of groping her on a flight, he said “Yeah, I’m gonna go after — believe me, she would not be my first choice, that I can tell you.” Good to know he has a violation-worthy  grading scale.

Trump also called another accuser, former People Magazine reporter Natasha Stoynoff, a “liar” and added, “Check out her Facebook, you’ll understand.” The crowd really liked that one and they laughed and laughed. She’s not pretty enough for…haha. Get it?

Since he was on a roll insulting women for their physical appearance he couldn’t leave out Hillary Clinton. Speaking of last Sunday’s debate, he said “and when she walked in front of me, believe me, I wasn’t impressed.”

I totally understand women like Hillary Clinton and Michelle Obama aren’t Trump’s type. They’re Yale and Harvard educated. He’s not in their league. But since we’re out there insulting women’s looks let’s fully punch that ticket on the crazy train and create a conspiracy theory. Choo! Choo!

Trump has decided that all these accusations are being masterminded by a Mexican billionaire who pulled out of a deal with Trump after the GOP nominee said “Mexico sends us rapists and murderers.”

Carlos Slim is one of the richest men in the world. He is so rich that Trump’s income is as comparable to his as mine is to Trump’s. You do not want the income of an unemployed cartoonist (Seriously, somebody bring me a sandwich).

They say that Mr. Slim is so rich and owns so many companies that you can’t go a day in Mexico without contributing to his wealth. Trump, who may not even be a billionaire, has to hate that. It’s probably why he has to put his name on everything. Though a “Slim” casino may not be very enticing.

Slim is a contributor to the Clinton Foundation (Sniff. Sniff. Conspiracy). One of the properties Mr. Slim has a stake in is The New York Times (why am I not in on this conspiracy and getting some of that Mexican billionaire money?). He is the largest private shareholder with 17%. Being a shareholder doesn’t mean you write the headlines but Trump swears there’s a conspiracy anyway. Never mind the fact that other accusers have been revealed by The Washington Post, People Magazine, The Palm Beach Post, and a few TV stations, that Slim Richy does not have any financial stake in (I had to play off “Slim Shady” somewhere in this post).

Trump really hates the idea that a Mexican (of Lebanese descent which probably makes it worse) is meddling in a U.S. election. Dammit, that’s for the Russians to do. He also blamed the “global business elite” and bankers. You know, Jews. Wink. Wink. Nudgy. Nudgy. If there was truly a global financial conspiracy against someone, wouldn’t Trump have gotten the invite? The guy hasn’t been living in cardboard boxes.

Getting back to the whole accused-for-sexual-harassment thing, Trump said anybody can be accused. Just like that time he told his supporters that if they punched a protester at one of his rallies that he’d pay for it, Trump said “even Obama can be accused by anybody.” Then he repeated “anybody.” Yes, anyone at all. Just about any ole little body. Just one person…who might need a tiny little push. A push by tiny little Cheeto fingers.

The problem with finding somebody to accuse the president is that he’s not a jerk like Trump. Not to mention if there was an angry female out who was groped by Obama then wouldn’t they have found her while they were hunting for that pesky birth certificate?

But Trump is big on degrading women. He wails about the injustice received by Bill Clinton’s accusers, then he trops them out for a sideshow photo-op. He’s gone on Howard Stern in the past and graded them with numbers while saying a “flat-chested woman can never be a ten.” That’s another thing guys stop doing after college. The score thing, yeah we don’t do that. Trump still does. We also don’t check out ten-year-old girls on escalators and say I’m gonna be dating her in a few years.” Yeah. Trump does that too.

Trump is so stupid he doesn’t understand how his latest defense doesn’t work. If someone’s not attractive enough for him to harass does that mean he does harass them when they do meet his neanderthal standards?

I’m gonna go with “Yep!”.

I had fun with this cartoon as all the terms here made me giggle. They’re really stupid. Stupid can be funny, like Donald Trump. “Eye Broccoli” was new to me as I had never heard that one before (I research stuff). And obviously I took “man hands” from Seinfeld. I do feel a little self-conscience since I’ve done so many Trump cartoons this week. I wanted to compare with a few other cartoonists so I counted how many Trump cartoons in a row three of my colleagues, who are also my favorites, had drawn. One of them had done four. Another had done five. And one of them has, at this point, done fourteen.

Fourteen. So leave me alone about drawing too many Trump cartoons.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

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Snake On A Plane


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Donald Trump is a pig and a bore.

During the debate Hillary Clinton brought up Trump’s derogatory comments toward women in the past.

After Alicia Machado won Trump’s 1996 Miss Universe pageant  Trump engaged in a shaming campaign against her. He was disappointed in her weight gain and referred to her as “Miss Piggy” and since she was Latina he called her “Miss Housekeeping.” He used her in promotions by making her exercise in front of the media and remarked “This is somebody who likes to eat.”

The morning after the debate Trump called in on Fox And Friends and defended his sexism by saying “She was the worst we ever had, the worst, the absolute worst. She was impossible. … And she gained a massive amount of weight, and it was a real problem.”

We were reminded of his comments regarding Rosie O’Donnell during the debate. In the past he referred to her as a pig and at the debate he said she deserved it and nobody felt sorry for her. I’m sure a lot of wife beaters have used the exact same defense. Trump has also called O’Donnell a “slob” with a “fat ugly face.” For a guy who’ll never be nicknamed “Bones,”  “Sticks,”  or “Slim Shady” Trump sure has weight issues.

He’s denied ever saying pregnancy is an inconvenience for businesses but he’s on tape saying it.

Donald Trump focuses more on his insecurities than he does on the details for the job he’s auditioning for. Not only do I not want the guy in the Oval Office, I wouldn’t want him in my car pool.

Trump’s ego got in his way at the debate which he didn’t prepare for and whined that it was unfair that Hillary Clinton was prepared. Hey, you got the same homework. One of you did it and the other spent his time holding rallies to feed his ego. I’m sure Trump paid “nerds” to do his homework in college and it’s too bad for him that he can’t outsource his debate.

Despite flailing like a sobbing, sniffling child Monday night Trump bragged about the polls that showed him winning the debate. Of course these polls were online polls where the voters can vote, refresh, vote, refresh, vote, refresh, etc. Breitbart is a dandy place to take the pulse of the nation, and yet he still only scored 80%. Perhaps he can get a letter from his doctor that declares his victory.

Trump wouldn’t be complete without the sexism to accompany his bigotry, racism, and all-out hatred.

Would you give an important job to someone with a “no fat chicks” sticker? Then why make him president? There’s a proverbial button in the White House and I don’t want Trump’s fat finger on it.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Enabler


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Just in case anyone doesn’t believe Donald Trump is a truly horrible, hideous, impersonation of a human being, he’s taken to blaming Hillary Clinton for her husband’s infidelity. At a rally Trump accused Hillary Clinton of trying to “destroy the lives” of her husband’s accusers. “She was an unbelievably nasty, mean enabler, and what she did to a lot of those women is disgraceful,” he said. Of course he didn’t offer any evidence.

Where would someone get the impression that Hillary Clinton tried to destroy the lives of her husband’s accusers? From the accusers of course.

I’m not a fan of attempting to discredit those who claim sexual harassment, abuse, and rape. I support investigating the charges. But when those making the accusations are selling books, interviews and nude layouts, well…let’s take a look at these accusers attacking Hillary.

Gennifer Flowers has made the claim that Hillary enabled Bill. Flowers definitely had an affair with Clinton but can’t offer any evidence that Hillary was aware of the affair, or attempted to destroy her. Floweres profited from the affair, selling the story to Penthouse (along with a nude pictorial) and the tabloid Star Magazine. She also did the talk show circuit, wrote an autobiography, and starred in two movies and a TV show. She even put the answering machine tapes she claimed were from Bill Clinton up for auction. So hey, it’s not like there’s anything to gain and her word should totally be trusted, right?

Kathleen Willey claims Bill Clinton sexually assaulted her and that Hillary, wait for it, enabled it. That’s a very serious charge not to be taken lightly. After the alleged assault took place Willey sent 15 letters and 12 phone messages for President Clinton requesting further contact. Since then Willey also wrote a book about her and the president. Today Willey is the paid spokeswoman of an organization formed by Trump’s close friend and political adviser, Roger Stone, called Rape Pac, but it was formerly titled “Women Against Hillary.” Willey sounds credible to me (insert eye roll).

Juanita Broaddrick claims she was raped by Clinton. Guess who she says enabled that. Guess who Broaddrick is actively campaigning for? I’ll give you a hint: He has his own helicopter with his name on it, but he doesn’t sell steaks.

Paula Jones claims Clinton sexually harassed her while he was governor of Arkansas and that Hillary enabled it. She sued Clinton over it and and eventually settled out of court, after it was dismissed when Jones failed to demonstrate any damages. Later a donor paid for her to get rhinoplasty and she posed for Penthouse Magazine. She’s a vocal supporter of Donald Trump and even took a selfie with him.

What about Monica Lewinsky. She’s not campaigning for Trump and hasn’t done any nude layouts. I haven’t seen any evidence of her campaigning against Hillary. She avoided talking about her affair with Clinton for over a decade. She actually tried to hide from the public and when she finally wrote about it, for Vanity Fair, her article was more about the aftermath of the scandal and the bullying and public shaming she received. Regarding Hillary, Lewinsky wrote “I find her impulse to blame the Woman – not only me, but herself – troubling.” That doesn’t sound so much like attempting to destroy someone as much as it is about blaming. But let’s see, sleep with a man and his wife doesn’t have nice things to say about you. Go figure. You’d think Hillary would be buying her handbags.

Being betrayed can mentally abuse a person. They may lash out and even blame themselves. For another individual, an outsider, to blame the spouse is heartless and inhumane. Attempting to benefit politically is disgusting.

I suppose if the extent of your tax plan is “I’m going to tax the rich and they’ll pay much less money” then I suppose you’re going to state a lot of crap to distract. I mean, what if someone asked Trump about something specific? Even worse, what if someone asks the Donald about his own infidelities?

The Republican War On Women continues.

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Planned Targeting


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The Center For Medical Progress created a sting operation and videos as bogus as their name. Their accusations that Planned Parenthood was selling and profiting from body parts of aborted children turned out to be a total lie and cleared by eleven state investigations. A Houston grand jury was the latest investigation and instead of delivering indictments on Planned Parenthood, they dished them out to David Daleiden, the head of the faker organization, and one of his colleagues, Sandra Merritt, on a felony charge for using fake driver’s licenses to gain access to a Planned Parenthood facility in Texas. Daleiden was also indicted on a misdemeanor count related to purchasing human organs; Planned Parenthood says it turned down an “astronomical amount” offered by Daleiden to procure fetal organs.

Karma.

Daleiden uses the defense that he uses the same tactics as journalists. Wrong. Journalism is not about presenting misinformation, no matter what the right wing believes (except on Fox News. There it will get you your own show). It’s also not about activism.

Daleiden’s agenda is to destroy Planned Parenthood. Unfortunately for him Planned Parenthood is operating within the law so to turn public opinion away from supporting the PP, he made stuff up. The majority of Americans support government funding for PP. If you’re a realist, even if you’re anti-choice, you would realize that PP actually decreases the amount of abortions in this country.

If you’re right and your argument is just and valid, then you shouldn’t have to lie. That’s the journalism part Daleiden doesn’t understand. If he gets locked up then he’ll plenty of time to think about it. Maybe he can share a cell with the guy who was so inspired by his videos that he shot up a clinic in Colorado.

Despite the indictments and the many investigations that have cleared PP, several presidential candidates are continuing with the lie. The most egregious being Carly Fiorina (who lies about EVERYTHING) and abducted children for an anti-choice speech and photo-op. Joining her in the lying liars club is Mike Huckabee, Marco Rubio, John Kasich, and Ted Cruz. Maybe Planned Parenthood will look into suing these people for slander and defamation. I think they have a case.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!