Science

Tate v Thunberg

Conservative men who flaunt their toxic masculinity love to troll liberals on the internet. But it’s never a good idea for a 36-year-old man to troll a teenage girl. It’s bullying, creepy, sexist, and just wrong. And they especially shouldn’t do it if the teenage girl is smarter than they are…which of course, most of them are.

Andrew Tate is a self-proclaimed misogynist. His entire brand is built on his character, which is being a right-wing sexist asshole.

He’s a former kickboxing champion who went on to greater fame when his fighting career ended. He was on the British reality TV show Big Brother until he was removed in 2016 after a video surfaced that appeared to show him physically assaulting a woman.

British-American Tate has been quoted saying he’s “absolutely a misogynist” and “I’m a realist and when you’re a realist, you’re sexist. There’s no way you can be rooted in reality and not be sexist.”

He’s said women are “intrinsically lazy” and there’s “no such thing as an independent female”.

Tate loves to flaunt his excessive lifestyle on social media, posting videos of his luxurious cars, yachts, private jets, etc. You won’t have a difficult time finding photos of him smoking a cigar. He’s boasted about bringing women into porn.

A post he made on his website that he’s since removed says, “My job was to meet a girl, go on a few dates, sleep with her, test if she’s quality, get her to fall in love with me to where she’d do anything I say and then get her on webcam so we could become rich together.”

Tate was banned from pre-Elon Twitter for tweeting that women should “bear responsibility” for being sexually assaulted. Elon reinstated him…and it probably landed Tate in jail. Tate decided it was a great idea to troll famed climate activist Greta Thunberg.

His trolling of Thunberg incites other sexist goons to troll, attack, harass, and threaten the 19-year-old Swede. Most of the attacks are extremely sexist. Of course, Tate doesn’t care if he endangers a woman’s life with his self-promotion of how sexist he is.

Tate tweeted to Thunberg, “I have 33 cars. My Bugatti has a w16 8.0L quad turbo. My TWO Ferrari 812 competizione have 6.5L v12s. This is just the start. Please provide your email address so I can send a complete list of my car collection and their respective enormous emissions”.

Greta, known for her no-nonsense bluntness, replied to Tate’s tweet saying, “yes, please do enlighten me. email me at smalldickenergy@getalife.com.”

As Kelso would say on That 70s Show, “BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURN!”

That was a serious burn and Twitter lit up. The champion of toxic masculinity got owned by a teenage girl…and it’s all his fault.

It took Tate ten hours to think of a retort, which was a two-minute video of him in a Versace bathrobe, smoking a cigar, and eating Jerry’s Pizza.

This Jerry’s Pizza is in Romania, and the box was seen in the video which may be what tipped off local police that Tate and his brother were in the country. Tate and his brother were arrested in connection to a human-trafficking investigation.

George Takai said that Tate was arrested because Greta Thunberg “owned him so hard his little wee-wee fell off.”

As Nelson Muntz would say, “Ha-ha!”.

The point of being conservative is to be as vile and disgusting as possible. But it often doesn’t work out and promoting yourself as the biggest asshole you can possibly be can have destructive consequences. You might get owned by a teenage climate activist or maybe it’ll get you thrown in jail.

Greta made another tweet after Tate’s arrest. “This is what happens when you don’t recycle your pizza boxes.”

Facebook Suspension Update: There are 14 days left in my Facebook suspension for typing the word “Taliban.” Here’s Quannah’s countdown clock.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Concrete Evidence

Lake Mead is a Colorado River reservoir just 30 minutes outside Las Vegas. Former Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman said Monday. “It’s not a bad place to dump a body.” Well, now it is.

Climate Change is an international crisis and it’s affecting everyone, whether they know it or not. Republicans in fucknut Florida claim it doesn’t exist while their state is slowly going underwater. In other locations, lakes and rivers are drying up. In the United States, we’re slowly losing Tulare Lake, Salton Sea, Pyramid Lake, Owens Lake, Mono Lake, and Lake Mead. Lake Mead is starting to reveal secrets.

The water level in Lake Mead has dropped more than 170 feet since 1983. Mayor Goodman is a lawyer who used to have Vegas mobsters as clients, and he said they were always very interested in “climate control,” which was mob code for keeping the lake level up and bodies down in their watery graves. Two sets of human remains have emerged in Lake Mead over the past week.

One of the bodies was found in a barrel and authorities say the person was shot.

Michael Green, a University of Nevada, Las Vegas history professor whose father dealt blackjack for decades at the Stardust and the Showboat, said, “If the lake goes down much farther, it’s very possible we’re going to have some very interesting things surface. I wouldn’t bet the mortgage that we’re going to solve who killed Bugsy Siegel, but I would be willing to bet there are going to be a few more bodies.”

Las Vegas was founded by the mafia with Bugsy Siegel being a driving force behind it. This isn’t a whispered-about secret. There’s a mob museum in Las Vegas. What was once a dried-up little desert town founded in 1905 started to grow with the construction of the nearby Hoover Dam, reduced residency for divorce, and the legalization of casino gambling, all in 1931. Now the U.S. Census predicts Nevada (in case you’re a Republican, that’s where Las Vegas is located) will be the fastest-growing state for the next two decades and by 2030, Las Vegas will have over four million residents. Right now, the population of the city is a little over 640,000.

The mafia is responsible for the creation of the nation’s most popular gambling destination, but the days of celebrity mobsters may be over. The bodies people are finding are from decades ago and while there are predictions more bodies will be found as Lake Mead dries up, most won’t be from mob hits. Sorry to ruin it for you.

Sure, a body in a barrel is a pretty good sign the mob was responsible, but most bodies may be from other murders or just swimming and boating accidents. Professor Green pointed out, “People will talk about this for the right reasons and the wrong reasons. They’re going to think we’re going to solve every mob murder. In fact, we may see some. But it’s also worth remembering that the mob did not like murders to take place in the Las Vegas area because they did not like bad publicity going out under the Las Vegas dateline.” Ever hear the expression, “Don’t shit where you eat?”

While discovering bodies in barrels is intriguing and adds to mob folklore, it’s the wrong focus on a lake evaporating. The real focus here should be Climate Change.

The mob will never kill as many people as Climate Change kills, which is blamed for over 250,000 deaths annually.

A grandmother dying from heatstroke in August because she can’t afford air conditioning may not be as glamorous as goons shooting Bugsy Siegel in the back of his head in Beverly Hills, but it’s the death we should be talking about. We still don’t know who killed Bugsy or why, but we know who’s killing grandma. Not to mention that cities like Las Vegas are having to find alternative sources of water.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Flat Earth Kitty Purr Purr Purr

CNN04252021

I’m always on my colleagues about drawing so many cliff cartoons. At the site GoComics, I saw four in one day last week. Cartoonists draw a lot of cliffs. I will draw one every now and then but I try to limit it to one a year…or even less. This cartoon does include a cliff, but since it’s, as my proofer Laura said, “So weird and random,” I don’t think it counts.

What do you think? Is this a cliff cliché cartoon?

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday. 

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have Three copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Singing In The Covid Rain

cjones01262021

Science and facts took a back seat during the Trump era. Who am I kidding? Back seat? Facts weren’t even along for the ride. Sean Spicer’s very first press conference was about the crowd size for Trump’s inauguration and how it was the “biggest attended and viewed in history.” And yeah, it was all fun and chuckles for a while, but when lives were on the line, it stopped being funny and became infuriating.

Donald Trump lied about the coronavirus…repeatedly. He didn’t just lie or make inaccurate comments. From the recordings between Trump and Bob Woodward, Donald knew he was lying.

It was a year ago that the first case of the coronavirus was detected in this country. When we had 15 cases, Donald Trump said it would soon be down to zero. A year later, we have 24,633,015 cases of the virus and 410,378 deaths.

Dr. Anthony Fauci, the nation’s leading infectious disease expert , said the “lack of candor or facts” contributed to the number of lives lost during the coronavirus pandemic over the past year.

Just as Donald Trump instigated a white nationalist terrorist attack against our government, he instigated a war on facts and science. He was the ringmaster of lies and the politicization of this disease. Because of Donald Trump, Republicans downplayed the virus and resisted the wearing of face masks and practicing social distancing. For all we know, these idiots stopped washing after going to the rest room. To them, pee fingers may be freedom and liberties.

Dr. Fauci is now liberated. For the past year, he was been held back from delivering briefings on the coronavirus, which have now resumed under the Biden administration.

Speaking to John Berman on CNN this morning, Fauci said he didn’t want it to be a “sound bite,” but said, “I think if you just look at that you can see that when you’re starting to go down paths that are not based on any science at all. That is not helpful at all, and particularly when you’re in a situation of almost being in a crisis with the number of cases and hospitalizations and deaths that we have.”

He continued, “When you start talking about things that make no sense medically and no sense scientifically, that clearly is not helpful.”

You mean things that don’t make sense medically or scientifically like Hydroxychloroquine being a cure…or, oh, I don’t know…injecting sunlight and bleach into the body? Shit like that?

Or maybe shit that didn’t make sense scientifically like holding massive hate rallies and crowded White House events. Trump politicized that and watched it kill his friend, Herman Cain. He politicized the events and watched himself, along with dozens of others in the White House, catch the virus. Do you know who didn’t catch the virus? Dr. Anthony Fauci.

As Dr. Fauci points out, “There’s no secret. We’ve had a lot of divisiveness, we’ve had facts that were very, very clear, that were questioned. People were not trusting what health officials were saying, there was great divisiveness, masks became a political issue.”

The Donald Trump administration killed people.

It went beyond being divisive in the Trump administration. His MAGAts are still attacking Dr. Fauci and portraying him as an evil science overlord shutting down the country while laughing like a maniac. Because of Trump’s attacks assisted from the goons at Fox News over something that never should have been partisan, Dr. Fauci and his family had to get protection. How dare he try to save lies.

In reference to President Biden, not the guy who used to occupy the Oval Office, Dr. Fauci said, “So, what the president was saying, right from the get-go was, let’s reset this. Let everybody get on the same page, trust each other, let the science speak.”

Dr. Fauci said it was “liberating” to work in the Biden administration. He’s free to speak his mind and disagree with the administration. In fact, he already has.

Yesterday, the administration said that the Trump administration left no vaccine distribution plan. One source said, “There is nothing for us to rework. We are going to have to build everything from scratch.” Fauci disagreed.

The doctor said, “We certainly are not starting from scratch. You can’t say it was absolutely not usable at all.” That’s not a huge endorsement about what Trump left behind. Maybe it’s like an empty peanut butter jar except you can still lick off what’s left under the lid. See? Not entirely unusable. But he did disagree with the administration sources, though not directly with President Joe Biden, who said the Trump administration’s distribution of coronavirus vaccines has been a “dismal failure.” The entire Trump presidency (SIC!) was a dismal failure.

But hey, it’s good to have facts back. It’s good not to be bullshitted over every matter large and small. This is the beginning of repairing the damage from the Trump administration which starts with being honest. Now, good luck convincing the 70 million who believe in deep state Satanic-worshipping pedophiliac lizard people to put on a mask.

Creative note: I’m so out of the habit of drawing cartoons that aren’t about a petty racist orange imbecile, that I didn’t realize this was a positive cartoon until a reader told me so. Maybe that’s why I felt funny about it the entire time I was creating it.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have an order of 20 copies of my book (11 are left to purchase) on the way, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. The books won’t arrive until after the new year, but orders are being taken and they’ll be shipped as soon as I receive them. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Happy Exploding Little Trees

cjones09182020

We do not have invisible airplanes. You can’t stop a hurricane by dropping a nuclear bomb on it. Energy efficient lightbulbs don’t make you appear orange. You can’t catch cancer from windmills. You can’t cure coronavirus by ingesting bleach or fish tank cleaner. Simply raking forests doesn’t prevent wildfires. And trees do not explode.

In 1998, I moved to Fredericksburg Virginia and I enrolled my eight-year-old son into Hugh Mercer Elementary. While driving him to school on his first day, he asked me why it was named “Hugh Mercer.” I told him Hugh Mercer was a great dude who lived in this town over two hundreds years ago. My son asked me what made him great? I said, “Because he did great things” My son asked, “What kind of great things?” Dammit, kid.

I told my son that Hugh Mercer did great things like stop a dinosaur alien invasion hundreds of years ago with a magic sword. He slayed half the dinosaur aliens and the other half flew away in their dinosaur alien space ships, crying all the way until they got to their home world, Dinosauranus. Everyone was so happy, they named an elementary school after him because that’s what you get when you stop a dinosaur alien invasion.

My eight-year-old looked at me the same way he does today at the age of 30. Like I’m an idiot.

That’s exactly how Trump sycophants should look at Donald Trump when he says stupid shit like, “With regard to the forest, when trees fall down after a short period of time, about 18 months, they become very dry, they become really like a match stick and they get up you know there’s no more water pouring through and they become very, very they just explode. They can explode.”

The difference between me selling my kid a load of horse shit and Donald Trump selling a load to his base is that I know I’m selling horse shit. Does Donald Trump know? My son is extremely smart and was even at eight. He also had an imagination and knew I had one too. But, shouldn’t adult Trump supporters be smarter than an eight-year-old?

Do you know how you know when you’re in a cult? When you accept lies as truth…even when you know they’re lies. You’ll also know you’re in a cult when you start defending those lies as truth. I’m sure some Trump cultists are already explaining that trees do indeed explode.

For the record, trees do not explode.

How crazy is it that in the fight to refute climate change, to call it a hoax and a political agenda, that you have to create crazy impossible shit that makes you sound like a dumbass? But then again, Trump is talking to a cult that believes there are deep state lizard people worshiping Satan while eating babies in the basement of a Washington pizza parlor.

If a tree falls in the forest and there’s no one there to hear it, does it still make a sound? If it explodes and there’s no one around, does that make a sound? If Donald Trump says a bunch of stupid shit and there’s no sycophants there to hear it, is Donald Trump still a dumbass? Yes. He’s still a dumbass.

And please, do not read this to a Trump supporter. I don’t want to have to explain to them there aren’t any dinosaur aliens invading us from the planet Dinosauranus.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

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He Blinded Me With Stupid

cjones09172020

Donald Trump is not a person who relies on facts. And a person who doesn’t rely on facts typically doesn’t believe in science. A humble person will admit to what they don’t know and listen to experts. Donald Trump will tell people who have spent their entire lives studying a subject, and without having any knowledge of it himself, tell them they’re wrong. Donald Trump is not a humble person. He doesn’t even know what it is not to know.

While speaking to the governor of California, Gavin Newsom, and other government officials, Trump argued against climate change. After weeks of silence about the wildfires in the western part of the nation, Donald Trump said, “I don’t think science knows what is happening.” Yeah, science is the confused one here.

Donald Trump doesn’t believe in climate change and has claimed it’s a hoax created by China. He’s not good with science…or knowing stuff in general.

After being handed special sunglasses and told not to stare into an eclipse, Donald Trump stared into an eclipse. If it burned out any brain cells, we’ll never notice.

Donald Trump asked about nuking a hurricane. He tried to change the direction of a hurricane with a Sharpie. He ordered government scientists to lie about the direction of a hurricane so it would jive with his mad Sharpie ninja skills.

Donald Trump asked if there was a way to cure people with covid-19 by drinking bleach. He’s touted other bogus remedies.

He thinks our government has invisible airplanes…or maybe we do and that’s another national security secret he exposed.

He thinks liberal lightbulbs make him appear orange…and it’s not his three inches of orange makeup.

He believes windmills cause cancer.

And with wildfires, he believes the lack of raking forests is a bigger cause than climate change.

Sure, we need better management of forests, (most of those being burned right now are on federal property…which Trump heads), but climate change is a very real factor, and science knows it.

Raking the forests doesn’t have anything to do with extreme weather. Having a rake won’t change the direction of the wind. It won’t make the air less dry. Rakes don’t stop hurricanes, droughts, flooding, tornadoes, a even a giant orange cloud smothering our nation.

Donald Trump promises the fires would decrease as it’s about to get cooler. He also promises the coronavirus would magically disappear by Easter. Today, there are nearly 195,000 dead from the virus…the Trump Virus. We can call the wildfires “Trump Fires.”

Joe Biden called Donald Trump a “climate arsonist” yesterday. Donald Trump pulled our nation out of the Paris Climate Accord, so yeah. He’s a climate arsonist.

The most science Donald Trump understands is that he knows he doesn’t want you to sneeze on him. Other than that, Trump doesn’t care if the world burns. Just give him eight more years.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

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Anti-Greta

cjones03092020

Climate activist Greta Thunberg from Sweden is only 17 years old. That has not stopped conservatives from attacking her. They are attacking and bullying a child for saying something they don’t want to hear. Even the president (sic) of the United States has engaged in bullying her. She’s a child. Now get this: An energy company distributed a sexually graphic image of Greta.

X Site Energy Services from Alberta, Canada initially claimed they were not responsible for the image of a child being sexually attacked. But after it was reported that an employee of the company was handing out the image on stickers, they’ve accepted full responsibility and have apologized. In a statement, the company says, “Oh my God! Who knew that depicting a child being sexually assaulted could burn us? We totally lost our minds in this new era were being cruel and acting like depraved, troglodyte assholes amount to humor and is the new thing for conservatives and climate denialists. Maybe in this era of Trumpism, we got carried away. Also, sorry we lied about it too. Our bad. We’ll try to stop being dicks.”

OK. I made that up. That’s what their statement should have said. It actually said that it’s “committed to recovering and destroying the decals we distributed.” Note that “we” in there. The statement added, “Management (dicks) accepts full responsibility and effective immediately, has made organizational changes to reflect this.” Now, the company is discussing a code of conduct with its employees as it seeks to maintain a “safe and respectful workplace.”

Here’s a free tip for oil companies: If you have to educate your employees that distributing child pornography, with or without your company’s logo on it, is bad, then you’re probably fishing in the wrong talent pool.

Greta visited Alberta last year and Edmonton-based artist Aja Louden painted a mural of her on a wall…which was later defaced with a slur and a pro-oil message.

At least the right-wing, oil-company funded think tank, Heartland Institute, didn’t resort to child porn to attack Great. Nope. They went out and got their own Greta. She’s the anti-Greta.

Her name is Naomi Seibt and she’s from Germany, where people used to goose-step (this is about to come up again, so pay attention). Naomi isn’t just on the same side as the Heartland Institute. She’s being paid by them. The heavy thinkers at Heartland have always been anti-science because they’re a financial tool for fossil fuel companies. Think tanks are businesses set up where billionaires and companies hire them to write their dogma, thus giving the appearance it’s coming from elsewhere and has credibility (and nobody hires me to write anything). Heartland hired Naomi to produce YouTube videos and to be the anti-Greta. It’s not my viewpoint they market her as the anti-Greta. They literally describe her as the anti-Greta.

Naomi is 19 and she said her interest in activism began out of concern about a wave of migration into Germany in recent years (people who aren’t white and Christian). This may come as a big surprise to you but Naomi is white. Last weekend (this will be less of a surprise) she was speaking as CPAC (Conservative Political Asshole Committee) where the Heartland Institute sponsors a bunch of anti-science shit and Donald Trump speaks. At this asshole event, she praised a white nationalist (Nazi).

She praised Canadian alt-right commentator Stefan Molyneux and said his prior racist comments have been taken out of context.

The Southern Poverty Law Center, which monitors hate groups, says Molyneux “amplifies ‘scientific racism,’ eugenics and white supremacism,” has hundreds of thousands of YouTube followers, and “has encouraged thousands of people to adopt his belief in biological determinism, social Darwinism and non-white racial inferiority.” Basically, he’s a Nazi.

I’m kinda getting tired of all these descriptions. Alt-right, white nationalist, Trump supporter, Donald Trump…let’s just call them all Nazis.

Seibt said Molyneux is an “inspiration” for her work. When asked at the conference by a reporter if that still holds true, she said, “I’ve always been skeptical of the ideas of white nationalism, of identitarianism and white identity. However, I am an empiricist, and I could not help but notice that I could have peaceful, free, easy, civilized, and safe discussions in what is essentially an all-white country.” She may as well have started her sentence, “I don’t mean to sound like a racist but…”

She said, “I am still a fan, absolutely.”

Did the Heartland Institute hire a Nazi to be their anti-Greta? Absolutely.

I’m starting to think that Naomi’s concern for immigrants entering her nation doesn’t have anything to do with economics, the climate, or science. She describes herself as an “empiricist,” which is that you can’t have knowledge without experience. That probably means she had a run-in with a brown person that freaked her out (like one cut in line at a movie and she was all like, “Oh, my God, they’re everywhere. They probably have cousins!”). The knowledge I’ve gained from my experience (and I have a few years of that stuff on Naomi) is that nations and societies are richer and much better off with diversity of cultures. I believe in melting pots and I know it’s the greatest strength and asset of our nation.

Seriously, Heartland? You couldn’t find an anti-Greta who’s not a Nazi? Germany is a very progressive nation now and while their alt-right, anti-immigrant movement (Nazis) is loud, they’re small. Yet, somehow, you found a Nazi in present-day Germany. Now, before the CPAC thing is over, you may want to let Naomi go before she goosesteps all over the place…unless you plan to goosestep with her.

Heartland knows that to confront science, then you have to lie. You have to lie a lot. They’ve been doing it for years. In fact, it’s their business model. They’re comfortable with being liars. The question is, are you comfortable with being racist? Actually, it’s probably not your first time.

To sum up, don’t hire people who will distribute child porn with your company’s logo on it (and maybe not any child porn. A conservative might be reading and that should probably be clear). Also, pay attention, Heartland…

…DON’T HIRE NAZIS!

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You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

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Goofy Science

cjones09162019

Fake news is not news and fake science is not science. And now, a future administration will have to repair the credibility of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration along with other scientific agencies within the government.

Science used to be non-partisan. But over the last few years, Republicans have made climate change a political issue. Somewhere along the way, facts became liberal. But even previous Republican administrations, while often quarreling with government scientists, did not blatantly try to change scientific fact, like the location of a hurricane.

Donald Trump doesn’t care about facts and he doesn’t put any priority into science. He’s a man who believes climate change is a hoax created by China. He once lied about the rain and claimed it stopped raining when he started a speech when it didn’t. He claimed the noise from windmills cause cancer.

The NOAA hasn’t had a confirmed leader since the Obama administration. On Friday, the NOAA, which oversees the National Weather Service, took the very unusual steps of issuing a statement criticizing one of their own meteorologists for contradicting Donald Trump and issuing an accurate weather report.

The NOAA isn’t backing up Trump to advance hard science, but only to coddle his ego and narcissism. Last week, Donald Trump doctored a weather map with a Sharpie after being criticized for warning Alabama about being impacted by Hurricane Dorian when that state wasn’t in its path. Trump has spent over a week defending a wrong tweet. Most people would say “oops” and move on with their lives. Trump, being a narcissist, can’t admit a little mistake. But now, this little mistake is destroying the credibility of the government’s science agencies.

First, the agency warned its scientists not issue any statements correcting or contradicting Donald Trump. After their bureau in Alabama did just that and Trump lost his shit, the NOAA backed up Trump with an official statement despite provable facts.

This isn’t the first time the Trump administration has ordered its agencies and government employees to contradict facts.

Shortly after lying about having the largest crowd size of any inauguration in U.S. history, Trump ordered the National Park Service to hunt for photographs that would support his claim. They didn’t find any.

Donald Trump created a commission to prove his claim about voter fraud. After the commission failed and disbanded, a member claimed its creation was rooted in Trump’s rage at losing the popular vote to Hillary Clinton.

When Trump claimed Middle Easterners were part of the migrant caravans headed to the border, he tried to get government agencies to support his lie. They failed.

Trump ordered agencies to create an impression that there would be a middle-class tax cut before the midterm elections (even though Congress wasn’t in session), which he had lied about. The tax cuts never happened.

The White House press office issued a doctored video to make CNN reporter Jim Acosta appear physically abusive to a White House aide.

After Trump created a bogus story about migrant women being blindfolded and gagged by drug traffickers, a top border official went on an internal hunt for information to make the story true. He failed.

The Department of Homeland Security released a slick presentation to support Trump’s lie that 4,000 known terrorists were prevented from crossing the border with Mexico.

Donald Trump is inflicting damage to this nation that will take years to repair. Our allies can’t trust us. A new report came out this morning that the CIA snuck a spy out of Moscow out of fear Trump would disclose him to Vladimir Putin. The Justice Department has become a lackey for Trump’s crimes. The entire Republican Party in Congress has become a cult. The State Department has to explain why we can trust promises from Kim Jong Un and the Taliban. The Defense Department has to publicly support losing funding to Trump’s racist, useless border wall. The military has to justify spending money at Trump’s resorts. The White House sends out lackeys to tell us the free press is an enemy to the United States. Now, the government’s science agencies have to sell us debunked science.

The only good thing is that we still have eyes, ears, and logic on our side. Unfortunately for Trump cultists, they’ve been told not to believe what they see and hear and they’re complying.

Maybe you and I can argue over the differences between Pluto and Goofy, but we should all know the difference between being rained on and pissed on.

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As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

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Trumpanus

cjones06102019

And we thought it was bad that Trump doesn’t understand tariffs, but once again, the dumbest president in the history of presidents of any nation in any galaxy, made a tweet that left the rest of saying, “What the hell?

Donald Trump took to Twitter and scolded NASA for focusing on returning to the moon instead of Mars and stated that the moon is a part of Mars. Seriously.

My girlfriend told me about the tweet last night, shortly after it happened. I had to see it myself because it was so stupid, I thought we may be losing something in translation. I mean, Trump is stupid but there’s no way…yep. He said the moon is a part of Mars. I’m sorry I doubted you, Amanda. The lesson here is, never underestimate the stupidity of Donald Trump.

What was his point? He confused everyone with the tweet before he even got the “moon is Mars” stuff. He’s chiding NASA for focusing on going to the moon AFTER he increased their budget with the agenda of…wait for it…going to the moon.

On May 13, Trump tweeted, “We are going back to the moon.” Last March, NASA administrator Jim Bridenstine, who was appointed by Trump, announced plans to send US astronauts to the moon by 2024.” Last October, Mike Pence, a guy who’s been anal probing Trump with his face for the past two years said, “Our determination is to see Americans back on the moon in the very near future.”

So there’s a huge flip-flop on policy that’s giving NASA and Republicans whiplash. But, the moon is a part of Mars? Did Trump means the budget for going to the moon was the same as Mars…or a part of that budget…or does he believe the moon is actually a part of Mars?

In case you’re a Republican, the moon is much closer to Earth (that’s where we live) than Mars. Most scientists believe the moon was created from another planet slamming into Earth (a very long time, like before Jesus was playing with his pet dinosaurs). And, in case you’re a Trump supporter, the moon is NOT a part of Mars. The moon is 140 million miles from Mars.

Now, someone in the Trump administration who once had high ideals before he or she sold their soul, has to go before the press and argue that the president of the United States, the same one who believes we have invisible airplanes, does not believe the moon is a part of Mars.

Or, that person is going to have to convince the press, and easily Trump’s supporters who chant “space force,” that the moon is a part of Mars, and that the information has been concealed by the Deep State of Obama, Hillary Clinton, James Comey, and Robert Mueller for decades. While we’re at it, the moon landing was fake, the Earth is flat, chemtrails are a real thing, and Pluto is a dog and a planet, and somehow, Donald Trump is qualified to be president.

This is why aliens don’t come here.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
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Blinding Him With Science

cjones04282017

Republicans don’t really do science. Most of them don’t believe in Climate Change. The frighteningly religious ones believe the planet is only 6,000 years old, give or take a few years. One Republican congressman (Todd Akin) believes a woman’s body will secrete magical juices to prevent it from becoming pregnant if she’s raped. Some, like former U.S. Representative Michele Bachmann, believe vaccines are responsible for mental retardation and others blame it for autism. She also believes in gay-conversion therapy. Some school districts in red states teach creativity over evolution. Chris Christie quarantined a nurse in a plastic tent for three days because she returned from West Africa where she was treating Ebola patients.

One of my favorite moments of a ridiculous Republican denying science was when Senator Jim Inhofe threw a snowball on the floor of the senate. Inhofe was the chair of the Senate Environment Committee.

I believe every Republican who denies science should drink a nice tall glass of Flint tap water.

On Saturday thousands of scientists participated in the March for Science to protest the Trump administration’s policies regarding their field. Trump has a problem with facts in general, but like most Republicans he can’t comprehend science.

Trump thinks Climate Change is a hoax which he blamed on China. He’s questioned the safety of vaccines. He’s put Rick Oops Perry in charge of our nuclear stockpile. He’s proposed an 18% cut for the National Institute of Health, and a 31% cut for the Environmental Protection Agency which is also facing losing a quarter of their 15,000 employees.

Speaking of the EPA, the goober he’s put in charge of that department, Scott Pruitt from Oklahoma (go figure), has sued it in the past over a dozen times, and doesn’t even believe in the environment. He recently stated that carbon emissions caused by human activity don’t have any effect upon the planet.

We can always have hope for our future but the Department of Education is led by Betsy Devos, who is an advocate for charter schools and has no experience with public education and got the job because she’s a major Republican campaign contributor.

Trump should be appreciative of science. There’s no telling how many animals had to suffer to test the products and techniques that enables his hair to still exist and defy gravity.

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