ProChoice

Alito’s Leaker


Before the Supreme Court issued its ruling in the Dobbs v Jackson Women’s Health Organization, a leak of the majority opinion, written by Associate Justice Samuel Alito, was published by Politico. This leak greatly upset the court, especially the conservatives.

The case was over the constitutionality of a 2018 Mississippi state law that banned abortions after 15 weeks. Instead of ruling about the constitutionality of a state banning abortions after 15 weeks, the court took the opportunity to use its brand new shiny 6-3 fucknut majority to overturn not just one previous Supreme Court ruling, but two…and ruled that there is no constitutional right to abortion.

The irony in this is that the Supreme Court was upset over their privacy being violated while they were stripping away all women’s rights to privacy.

After investigating the leak for months, Supreme Court Marshal Gail Curley said the court could not determine with certainty “the identity of any individual who may have disclosed the document or how the draft opinion ended up with Politico.” Boo-hoo. But Alito thinks he knows who leaked it.

In an interview with a conservative editorial writer for The Wall Street Journal (aren’t they all conservative?), Alito said, “I personally have a pretty good idea who is responsible.” Fortunately, he acknowledged that a “pretty good idea” is “different from the level of proof that is needed to name somebody.”

I respect that and it’s why I haven’t outed the “anonymous cartoonist.” Yeah, I know who he is but since there’s no official proof, I feel it’d be unethical to out him without it. I need to be as ethical and certain as possible to out someone for being unethical. There’s at least a one percent chance that there’s another cowardly spineless cartoonist out there who stole Jeff MacNelly’s style, is a lying gaslighting conspiratorial idiot, and can’t comprehend the issues he’s talking about.

But Alito really wants to leak the leaker and says the leak “was a part of an effort to prevent the Dobbs draft … from becoming the decision of the court. And that’s how it was used for those six weeks by people on the outside — as part of the campaign to try to intimidate the court.” Once again, conservatives portray themselves as the victims while victimizing people.

But one could argue the leak was done to allow yee-haw states time to prepare to ban abortion as soon as the ruling was issued. Many states had so-called trigger laws, which meant abortion would be banned immediately when a SCOTUS ruling was issued that overturned Roe.

Alito said the theory that the draft was leaked by someone on the right to lock in the five votes necessary to overturn Roe “is infuriating to me.”

He said, “Look, this made us targets of assassination. Would I do that to myself? Would the five of us have done that to ourselves? It’s quite implausible.” He also said, “It was rational for people to believe that they might be able to stop the decision in Dobbs by killing one of us.” With that statement, Alito isn’t accusing a clerk, janitor, security guard, or other support staff to the court. He’s implying one of the three liberals on the bench is responsible for the leak.

And then, Alito whined about the court being criticized for its lack of ethics. Without mentioning Clarence Thomas, or the gifts lavished on him by his billionaire buddy, Alito said he believes reports about ethical violations by justices are attempts to damage the court’s credibility now that conservatives are firmly in control. He said, “We are being hammered daily, and I think quite unfairly in a lot of instances. And nobody, practically nobody, is defending us.” Again, boo-hoo. The court’s credibility hasn’t been damaged by its critics but by its conservative justices, the Republican senators who stole seats from Presidents Obama and Biden, and the Russian puppet president (sic) who nominated three of the justices.

Alito defended overturning legal precedent with Roe v Wade and Planned Parenthood v Casey, and said those SCOTUS rulings “are so egregiously wrong, so clearly wrong, that that’s a very strong factor in support of overruling them.” But during his confirmation hearing nearly 30 years ago, he said didn’t use the phrase “egregiously wrong” and instead, said, “Roe v. Wade is an important precedent of the Supreme Court. It was decided in 1973, so it has been on the books for a long time. “It is a precedent that has now been on the books for several decades. It has been challenged. It has been reaffirmed.”

What’s been reaffirmed is that Associate Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito is a lying whiny crybaby. He’s whining that people don’t like him for restricting women’s rights.

Music note: I listened to the Foo Fighters.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box

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Invaded By Oz


The most troubling thing that came out of the John Fetterman/Mehmet Oz debate for me wasn’t Fetterman’s struggle to express himself after his stroke. No, the most troubling was Mehmet Oz saying the quiet part out loud.

Oz said the federal government should stay out of abortion and it should be between a woman, her doctor…and her local politician. First off, the Supreme Court is one of the three branches of the federal government, but if elected, Dr. Oz wouldn’t be the first Republican senator not to know that. They think it’s the House, Senate, and church.

As Trevor Noah pointed out about Oz’s statement, “He started that sentence like he was on the side of women, then he snuck in the politicians at the end like a teenager buying condoms at the gas station.”

Dr. Oz desperately wants to be the next United States senator representing Pennsylvania. He wants it so bad that he’s considering actually moving to Pennsylvania. And he also wants to desperately join with Republicans in the federal government and enact a national ban on abortion. What? He didn’t say that? That’s because he’s a Republican and they’re all liars.

Dr. Oz built his fortune on selling quack medications and snake oil. It’s how he can afford ten homes, mostly mansions, with one of them being a recent purchase in Pennsylvania which is being remodeled and vacant. But being a lying ignoring snake oil salesman makes him an ideal candidate for the Republican Party. They loves them some conmen.

Stephen Colbert said, “No one should have to discuss health care with their local political leaders. Especially if you live in one of those really small towns where the local mayor is a dog. ‘Making this decision was ruff. But I believe life begins at…squirrel!”‘

I have to disagree with Colbert. Discussing your health care with a dog is much safer and more rational than talking about it with a Republican.

Creative note: I wrote this cartoon last Thursday and put it on the shelf. I didn’t give it a lot of consideration until this morning. I’m in Washington, DC. I was invited to attend a seminar at The Washington Post (not because I’m a famous and important cartoonist, but because I’m a subscriber and they probably pulled my name out of a hat. There were bagels and yogurt. Nice). I only attended half the seminar as I wanted to get to work on my cartoon, though I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. Sitting at my favorite coffee shop in Washington (SoHo Tea and Coffee on the corner of P and 22nd. Check it out), I went through a few of the roughs I’ve drawn over the past few days, and seeing this with fresh eyes made me laugh. Proofer Laura said it was “disturbing.” That’s exactly what I was going for.

Music note: I listened to The Beatles through my Air Pods, though the coffee shop is playing music. But the stuff they’re playing is the “Old Town Road” song and that song about huge butts by Meghan Trainor, “All About That Bass” or something. It’s truly dreadful stuff.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Herschel’s Privates


I actually heard a Republican make this argument on TV a few days ago. If Herschel Walker encouraged a girlfriend to get an abortion, or even paid for it, why that’s his personal life and we should respect his privacy. Seriously?

Herschel Walker is a lying hypocrite…and so is the entire Republican establishment.

Someone said you can nominate Satan and if he’s running against a Democrat, Republicans will vote for him. Their logic is that despite who and what he is, he’ll vote and give them what they want, which is a total nationwide ban on abortions. This makes them hypocrites and liars since they used to argue abortion is a state issue.

Republicans have already proven they’ll vote for the vilest horrendously flawed human beings to get what they want. Case in point: Donald Trump. Trump proved Republicans are liars when it comes to family values, patriotism, democracy, and fiscal conservatism. They voted for the most disgusting shitweasel on the planet and sacrificed all their principles for a Supreme Court majority, which is also made up of lying hypocritical disgusting fundamentalist shitweasels.

Herschel Walker isn’t qualified to be a United States Senator, which makes him the perfect candidate for the Republican Party, because Republicans are unqualified to lead and govern this nation. They’re also lying hypocrites.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Apple Watching You


Full disclosure: This cartoon was drawn on an iPad. All of my cartoons have been drawn on an iPad since June 2021, and I believe I only have 11 payments left until I officially own my Ipad.

I love my iPad and my iPhone. I love how easily they make everything. I love how they sync together. I love that when I bought my very-outdated AirPods, I didn’t have to sync them to my devices. They automatically knew each other. I like that when I take a photo, it knows where I took the photo and will later present me with a gallery of the photos taken at that location. Hey, here’s your trip to Las Vegas or your trip to New York City. To me, that’s some fun tracking.

Apple unveiled the latest versions of its iPhone and watches last Wednesday. It’s the iPhone 14 and Apple Watch Series 8. I never buy the latest newest most up-to-date tech, but I did last year when I got my iPhone 12 and iPad pro 12.8. For about seven minutes, I was up to date with the latest technology. I don’t see any reason to update again for a while. But, there are people who bought the iPhone 13 and will now rush to own the 14, and in a few months the 15, then the 16…yeah, get out of here.

And while I do like Apple stuff, I realize they screw over the people who are loyal to them. You would think that someone who spends $2,000 on an iPad wouldn’t have to shell out another $130 for the Apple Pencil (and in my case, you’d expect the pencil to actually work and not crap-out and force you to wait several days for Apple to send you a new one). Microsoft’s first few versions of its Surface Pro included its Surface Pen until they got smart and started selling it separately. The iPhone used to come with EarBuds you could plug into your device. Now, not only do they not include the free EarBuds, but the newer iPhones don’t even include the input for your old EarBuds, forcing you to purchase AirPods if you want to listen to music privately. Nobody wants anyone else to know they’re listening to Cold Play.

As usual, there are new features to these products with one for the watch being a fertility tracker. The thing tracks women’s periods and fertility and will tell her when she’s ovulating. This feature can be very cool or very scary. Some people haven’t been this upset with Apple since that time they hid a U2 album on iPhones.

I think a watch that tracks your steps can be very cool. And it’s cool that it can track your heartbeat and warn you of palpitations and stuff like that. I’m not afraid of this stuff because I’m concerned about being tracked, but because I kinda get the feeling the watch will be like, “Are you sure you want to be eating all that pork?” But some people are concerned about how Apple is tracking them and where and how they’re storing the data. Hopefully, it’s better than the system of hiding shit in a basement at Mar-a-Lago.

It’s like when the vaccines came out and a lot of people were afraid of being vaccinated by the government. White people with concerns were mostly lying conspiracy-driven fucks believing the vax contained itty-bitty tracking chips, but black Americans had a better right to be concerned about what was in the vaccines and how it’d affect them. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, Google “Tuskegee Syphilis Study.”

You might think we shouldn’t be too concerned about Apple storing data about us or Alexa sending all our personal deets back to her masters at Amazon, or another device tracking your sleep farts, though it does sound kinda Orwellian that not only are corporations tracking us, they’re selling us the products used to do the tracking.

That’s kinda like Nike selling you a shirt that advertises their product, and don’t get me started on my beef with YouTube showing me a commercial before I can watch a trailer to a movie. They’re forcing me to watch a commercial before I can watch a commercial. You motherfuckers, you.

But women have every right to be concerned with a corporation tracking their fertility after Republicans have wiped out abortion in nearly half the nation and working on banning legal abortion in the rest of it. And now, Apple will know when you’re ovulating and Amazon will know what tampons you’re buying. Getting ahold of this information is a Republican’s wet dream. Also, “Republican Wet Dreams” would be the worst-selling erotic novel on Amazon. Others would be “Ted Cruz comes into Bloom,” “Lindsey’s Night of Georgian Passion,” “Rand Paul: Just a Gigolo,” and “Trump’s Moist Misadventure in Moscow.” By the way, which word do women find the most disturbing? “Moist” or “Ted Cruz?”

So maybe when the government is doing all it can to erase privacy, and the Supreme Court saying the Constitution doesn’t guarantee a right to privacy except for where they live, it might be a rotten time for a corporation that’s worth over $2 trillion to sell a product made to stalk your periods.

What’s next? Is Apple going to charge us to name our children after them? Actually, Cold Play’s Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow did name one of their kids “Apple.”

I love my Apple stuff. I love my iPhone, iPad, and Air Pods, but they need to be careful about what they force upon their customers. If the new stuff includes an ebook titled, “a Moist Ted Cruz,” I’m throwing my shit out the window.

Creative note: This is from the batch drawn up before the Queen’s passing, which put everything else on hold. The rough for this was drawn up Wednesday evening after Apple released the new series. I wasn’t sure I was going to make a real cartoon out of this.

Music note: I listened to some Coheed and Cambria.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Follow Kansas


The Wizard of Oz is a brilliant movie, especially when you factor in the time it was made. From top to bottom, with the script, music, performances, costumes, and color, it’s nearly a perfect movie. And for cartoonists, it’s full of metaphors. Who hasn’t used flying monkeys in a cartoon? I usually stop at flying monkeys, but most other cartoonists mine the entire film for references in their work. The late great Dick Locher, who drew Dick Tracy and was an editorial cartoonist for the Chicago Tribune, once wrote a column about his love for using the Wizard of Oz in his cartoons. He had no shame in it, nor should he have. But, I have never really connected with using it in my cartoons, other than with the flying monkeys.

The flying monkeys are perfect for MAGA so I got a lot of use out of that metaphor. But I’ve never been able to connect to the rest of the movie. Honestly, for cartoons, it’s always bored me. So I struggled a bit with drawing this because I had a hard time getting into it. While I felt it was a good cartoon, I had doubts because of my anti-Wiz instincts. So I felt some relief when Laura, one of my proofreaders told me she liked it (without my having to fish for a compliment).

I told Laura about my doubts (I have them often), and she reassured me by saying, “Hey, who belongs in abortion commentary more than a teenage girl who spends a lot of time with men into cosplay? I’d say Dorothy has a stake in the issue.”

I told her that was going into the blog because it made me literally laugh out loud.

And Kansas seems to understand that Dorothy and all women in that state have a stake in the issue. Last night, Kansas voters resoundingly decided against removing the right to abortion from the state constitution.

It wasn’t a close victory either with the vote coming down to 59 percent in favor of keeping abortion as a right to 41 percent who opposed. This is a solid rejection of the United State Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade, the landmark decision that had protected abortion rights throughout the country. 

Republican lawmakers across the nation are in a frenzy to ban all abortions in yee-haw states, even when the life of the mother is in danger. Even in the case of rape and incest. Kansas is the first time it’s been given to voters instead of fundamentalist fucknut lawmakers. Kansas voters said no.

Here’s the thing, kids. Kansas is a yee-haw state. Donald Trump beat Joe Biden in Kansas in 2020, 56 percent to 41 percent. In that election, Kansas was 19 percent more Republican than the national average. Abortion got a higher percentage last night than Trump got in 2020.

How bad is it for this nation that Kansas is more liberal and reasonable than the Supreme Court?

Kansas is not pro-abortion. It’s not liberal about abortion. It’s not a liberal position to want abortion to remain legal, despite what Republicans tell you. Republicans are the ones who are extreme on this issue. Forcing a ten-year-old to have her rapist’s baby is the extreme position.

It’s safe to say that the majority of Kansas voters would allow restrictions on abortion, but they don’t want it banned outright. Today, abortion is legal in Kansas up to the 22nd week of pregnancy. Other Republican fucknut yee-haw states are trying to ban it outright. Who knew Kansas was more liberal than Ohio?

Republicans put this measure on the ballot believing they were on the right side of the issue. They thought Kansas voters would send a message to the nation on banning abortion. They were right. The right-wing conservative majority of Kansas said to keep abortion as a constitutional right. Oops.

In 2017, Gallup found that 70 percent of Republicans wanted abortion to remain legal. It said 56 percent wanted it legal in some circumstances while 14 percent said all. In 2018, an NBC/Wall Street Journal poll found that 52 percent of Republicans did NOT want Roe v. Wade overturned. A study by the Pew Research Center published June 13, 2022, found that 61 percent of U.S. adults say abortion should be legal in all or most cases

Republicans learned something last night. They learned not to give the issues to voters again. While I’m sure all the yee-haw states would love to restrict the hell out of abortion, I bet the majority of voters in every state would vote to keep abortion legal. I bet the majority of voters in every state think it’s a really horrible position to force a child to give birth to her rapist’s baby. The fact is, the majority of this nation is pro-choice.

What kind of monster would force a child to give birth to her rapist’s baby? A fundamentalist fucknut Republican monster.

Pro-choice is not pro-abortion. Pro-choice people don’t love abortion.

Years ago when my little sister was a teenager, I asked if she was pro-life or pro-choice. She said she was pro-life as she thought abortion was wrong and she could never see herself getting one. So I said, “So, you believe abortion should be illegal.” And she said, “God, no. That option should be there, especially in the case of rape and incest. I just wouldn’t get one.” Then I had to give my little sister the horrible news that she was pro-choice. Now, she may have changed her mind since then since she’s gone full MAGA, but my point is, pro-choice is not pro-abortion.

The fact is, abortion should remain legal, even if you hate it.

Republicans can click their heels all they want but it won’t stop their anti-abortion position from always being the wrong position. Republicans know this too. You can bet they won’t put any more abortion questions on red state ballots again.

Music note: No, I did NOT listen to the Wizard of Oz soundtrack while drawing this. I listened to Weezer.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Rapey McForehead


Bad news, pro-choice ladies. Rapey McForehead says you’re too ugly to sleep with and impregnate. Awww…I know. You’re heartbroken. I know you had your hopes up. Sorry.

Matt Gaetz is a vile reprehensible disgusting troll, so it makes perfect sense he kinda looks like a garden troll. But even garden trolls in their late 30s wouldn’t try to take your daughter to prom.

Your garden troll would also probably have too much respect for women to show nude photos of them to colleagues on the floor of the United States House of Representatives.

But even if your garden troll was vile, reprehensible, disgusting, and had zero respect for women, he probably wouldn’t be dumb enough to go around grading the physical aspects of women while he was under an FBI investigation for having sex with a minor. And that’s exactly what Florida Representative Matt Gaetz is doing, commenting on the physical aspects of protesters while he himself is under investigation for having sex with a minor, paying for sex, and sex trafficking.

At the same conference, where he was telling kids “say no to fatties,” Matt Gaetz made a comment that Mike Pence will “never be president,” and refered to him as a “RINO.” Really? Mike Pence is a moderate? Maybe somewhere in the Marvel Cinematic Universe’s multiverse, there’s a moderate Mike Pence. But, Pence’s former Chief of Staff, Marc Short, took notice of Gaetz’s comment and said, “Well, I don’t know if Mike Pence will run for president in 2024, but I don’t think Matt Gaetz will have an impact on that. In fact, I’d be surprised if he’s still voting. It’s more likely he’ll be in prison for child trafficking by 2024.”

Speaking to Turning Point USA Student Action Summit in Tampa, yeah…kids, Matt Gaetz said women who care about reproductive rights and control over their bodies are too ugly for him and other Republicans to fuck. It was very reminiscent of when Donald Trump defended himself by saying his accusers weren’t hot enough for him to sexually assault.

Gaetz told students (who thought this was a good idea?), “How many of the women rallying against overturning Roe are over-educated, under-loved millennials who sadly return from protests to a lonely microwave dinner with their cats, and no bumble matches?”

Hey, kids. It’s fun and totally appropriate to sexualize women. The congressman does. The only hope here is that the kids were too distracted by Gaetz’s giant freaking forehead to have paid attention to the sexism that was coming out of his stupid big-teeth mouth.

This is a tactic Republicans often use when they can’t counter an argument. They try to destroy their opponent’s credibility. The problem with Gaetz’s use of this tactic is that Gaetz isn’t smart enough to use it. What does anyone’s physical appearance have to do with their position on human rights? Gaetz isn’t smart enough to understand that a lot of people advocate for the rights of other people, even if it doesn’t personally affect them. Case in point: I believe in abortion rights even though I can’t get pregnant and don’t plan on impregnating anyone ever again. I oppose GOP efforts to make it harder for black Americans to vote, even though their racist legislation won’t affect my right to vote.

Gaetz and other Republicans don’t get that you can care about people who are not you. Even Homer Simpson eventually had this epiphany in The Simpson’s Movie.

But, Gaetz wasn’t done. The guy who can’t get laid unless he pays a child for it (supposedly) said, “Have you watched these pro-abortion, pro-murder rallies? The people are just disgusting. But why is it that the women with the least likelihood of getting pregnant are the ones most worried about having abortions? Nobody wants to impregnate you if you look like a thumb. These people are odious on the inside and out. They’re like 5’2”, 350 pounds, and they’re like, ‘Give me my abortion or I’ll get up and march and protest.’ I’m thinking, march? You look like you got ankles weaker than the legal reasoning behind Roe v. Wade. A few of ‘em need to get up and march. They need to get up and march for like an hour a day, swing those arms, get the blood pumping, maybe mix in a salad.” I wonder if Gaetz swings his arms while trolling high schools?

Apparently, Gaetz has been seeking out PILFs, protesters he’d like to fuck. At some point, I hope the person who booked Gaetz for this event realizes it wasn’t a good idea to book a man in favor of forcing ten-year-old girls to give birth to their rapists’ babies, might be a rapist himself.

Hey, everyone, the possible pedophile has some thoughts on your abortion protest.

But what if Gaetz is right? What if a person can be too ugly to protest? If some people are too ugly to protest, then some people are too stupid looking to serve in Congress.

And if having someone who wants to sleep with you is a requirement to have an opinion, then every incel on GAB, 4chan, Truth Social, and all the other social media sites need to get off the internet. Paying someone for sex doesn’t count, since they have to WANT to sleep with you.

Why is it that the men who think they’re qualified to determine who is and isn’t attractive enough to have sex are always men who look like Donald Trump and Matt Gaetz? Has Matt Gaetz seen himself? Does he have a mirror large enough to catch his face and forehead? Why is it that the men who criticize women’s appearances the most are always the men who’ve been accused of rape and sexual assault?

This brings up the late great George Carlin, who Gaetz stole his bit from (we have the internet too, fucko). Carlin asked, ““Why is it that most of the people who are against abortion are people you wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place?”

Looking at Matt Gaetz and Donald Trump, quite frankly, I think most women would rather fuck a garden troll.

Creative note: The title of this blog was actually just a holding title, and I forgot to change it before publishing. Eh. Oh well.

Music note: I listened to Hall & Oates and The Cars while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

A Republican Problem


I drew a similar cartoon about a month ago but focused on baby formula. That cartoon actually grew from this idea, but I wanted to return to it today.

In the blog for that cartoon, I included George Carlin’s famous rant about Republicans and their “pro-life” position that if you’re pre-born, you good, but after you’re born, you’re fucked.

One ranking has the United States 33rd out of 36 first-world nations in infant mortality. That’s nearly six deaths per 1,000 births. Of 41 nations UNICEF ranked on child poverty, the United States was fourth from the bottom. In the same UNICEF ranking, the U.S. ranks 32 in mental well-being and 38 in physical health.

Republicans are excited about ending abortion and protecting the life of a fetus, but fuck that fetus once it’s a legitimate human being. Republicans oppose social welfare while loving corporate welfare. We spend twice on corporate welfare than we do on social welfare. Republicans want welfare recipients drug-tested…well, just the social welfare recipients. The corporate guys can be total snort heads for all they are. None of the big oil executives reaping record profits at this time while also receiving government welfare are required to piss in cups.

The drug-testing requirement is cruel. Republicans are willing to starve a child if its mother has a little marijuana in her system. If you are on welfare and have a child and you smoke a little weed, I don’t care. I care about the child and since all children are terrorists, you probably need that weed.

I grew up in and out of poverty and I can tell you from personal experience that when bill collectors knock on doors, it affects the children.

Republicans don’t want the government to finance prenatal care. You would think that at the very least, they’d want to increase healthcare for that fetus they’re so concerned with. They don’t want to finance health care for children. They don’t want anything to do with extending maternity leave. They don’t want to assist with daycare for when the maternity leave is over. And damn if they don’t want to defund school lunches.

President Biden proposed cash payments for parents, universal prekindergarten, and other family benefit programs such as expanded child-care subsidies, but Republicans oppose every bit of it. Analysts say last year’s expiration of Biden’s one-year expansion of the child-tax-credit, that every Republican not named Mitt Romney opposed led to a 41 percent spike in child poverty.

Senate goon Rick Scott said he opposes efforts to create programs that would reward parents who do not work, so basically, fuck that kid if its parents are lazy. Goon Senator Patrick Toomey said he had not given thought to the idea of expanded child benefit support, because goons only think about the pre-born…after you’re born, you’re fucked. Ted Cruz, one of the gooniest of goons in the Senate, said Republicans will look to “enact policies that make it easier for families to raise kids,” but his party would oppose new spending measures.

I did the math on Ted Cruz’s plan of new policies making it easier for families to raise kids without new spending measures from the government, and have discovered zero plus zero equals Republican bullshit. I have two middle fingers for Ted. One middle finger plus one middle finger equals fuck you, Ted Cruz.

Ted Cruz probably believes the best reason to have children is so you can blame them for your sudden cowardly retreats to Cancun when the going gets tough.

Ted said, “There is always support in the Republican conference for tax cuts; there is always support in the Democratic conference for spending more and more money.” No, Captain Asshat. There’s is always Republican support for tax cuts for corporations, billionaire assholes, and trust-fund babies. Republicans opposed the child-tax credit. Hell, Rick Scott even proposed raising taxes that would have pushed over 18 million Americans into poverty.

And, when it comes to gun violence that slaughters children like the 19 in Uvalde, the best plans Republicans can come up with are eliminating doors and adding more guns to society.

George Carlin was right. When it comes to Republicans, “If you’re pre-born, you’re fine; if you’re preschool, you’re fucked.”

Creative note: I started this cartoon yesterday but put it aside for the demon football prayer cartoon.

Music note: I listened to Coheed and Cambria while drawing and coloring all these babies.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Our Dystopian Future


The people who argue that you can’t ban guns because people will still get guns are the same troglodytes who support banning abortion. But you don’t ban abortion, you just outlaw it.

This is a momentous occasion and I wasn’t sure how to address it with a cartoon. I’m still not sure. There’s so much to take from this.

Roe v. Wade was overturned by the will of the minority in this nation. More Americans voted against Donald Trump than for him. More Americans voted for Democratic Senate candidates than for Republicans. Yet, the people who were put in power by the few placed three justices on the court to overturn Roe v. Wade.

The justices lied in their confirmation hearings. They each assured us that the Constitutional right to an abortion was precedent and protected law. Somehow after they were confirmed, it became “egregiously wrong.”

The man who nominated three of the six justices who overturned abortion tried to steal an election he lost through a coup and install himself as a fascist dictator.

Three of the six justices are sitting in stolen seats. Neil Gorsuch’s seat was stolen from an Obama nominee because Mitch McConnell wouldn’t even allow a hearing, claiming it was too close to an election and the people needed to have a say in the next appointment, never mind the fact that after the election more people had voted for Hillary Clinton than Trump and for more Democrats than Republicans, who voted to confirm Neil Gorsuch.

The seat Brett Kavanaugh sits in was occupied by Justice Anthony Kennedy, who resigned so Trump could fill it…which he couldn’t have filled if Putin hadn’t meddled in our election to install Trump into the presidency. Take it for what it’s worth, but for years, Kennedy’s son was in charge of real estate loans for Deutsche Bank, and he approved millions in loans for Trump when no other bank would.

Amy Coney Barrett, who had less than three years of experience as a judge before her nomination, is sitting in Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s seat, which became vacant less than two months before the election. So according to Mitch McConnell’s own argument about letting the people decide in the next election, Barrett is sitting in a stolen seat.

One of the six justices who voted to overturn Roe v. Wade, Clarence Thomas, is married to a woman who helped Trump try to steal the election and install himself as a fascist dictator.

Each of the six justices are religious zealots. They are dictating laws onto this nation based not on the Constitution, but their fundamentalism.

All six of justice have been members of the Federalist Society, and extreme far-right fucknut legal club that has too much influence on our nation’s legal system. They provided Donald Trump with a list of judicial candidates to choose from.

The Supreme Court didn’t ban abortion outright. They just overturned Roe v. Wade and gave the decision to the states. We can expect at least 26 states to ban outright and several other states to pass heavy restrictions.

Republicans have always cried that abortion should be left to the states, not the federal government. But since Republicans are lying goons, we will see bills brought up in Congress to ban abortion nationally. If Republicans take the House and Senate and have enough votes to override a presidential veto, abortion will be outlawed even in blue states like New York, New Jersey, Colorado, Oregon, Washington, California, Illinois, Maryland, Massachusetts, etc.

Will there be some Republicans in the House and Senate who will vote against a national ban on abortions? Sure, but their numbers are low and there are morons amongst them. Senator Susan Collins actually believed Brett Kavanaugh when he “assured” her he wouldn’t overturn Roe vs. Wade and voted to confirm him.

A lot of people are speculating abortion is just the first domino and contraception, marriage equality, and even integration of schools will be banned. Clarence Thomas has basically asked the yee-haw states to send cases on those issues to the Supreme Court so they ban those items.

If you’re thinking “golly-gee wilikens, they wouldn’t take a case restricting birth control as an excuse to outright ban it,” you are more gullible than Susan Collins. The very case they used to overturn Roe v. Wade wasn’t a total ban on abortion. The case from Mississippi was a ban on abortions after 15 weeks. The Supreme Court would have been wrong to side with Mississippi on the ban after 15 weeks, but instead of just being wrong, the six justices overstepped their mandate.

This is the deal Mitch McConnell and Republicans made with the devil, Donald Trump. They’ve been trying to end abortion since 1973. They don’t care that they could only do it by deception and through a racist pussy-grabbing narcissistic orange shitgibbon. And they’re not done since it’s still legal in every state.

Republicans are not going to be satisfied to let blue states make their own decisions. The evidence of that is they aren’t letting women make their own decisions.

Music note: I listened to some Incubus and Stone Temple Pilots while drawing all these bricks.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Alito’s Permission


The decision about to be handed down by the Supreme Court allowing states to outright ban abortion is a sexist one made mostly by men. These men have made up their minds about what a woman can or can’t do with their bodies. They’re not legislating what men can or can’t do with their bodies. Four of the five justices in the majority on this are Catholics. While 23 percent of the nation identifies as Catholic, six out nine of the current Supreme Court justices practice Catholicism.

Conservatives will point out that one of the justices voting to ban abortion is a woman. Yes, Amy Coney Barrett is a woman and one of the Catholics on the bench. But, she’s not just a Catholic. She’s also a member of People of Praise, a network of ecumenical intentional communities. What the hell is an intentional community? Think of it like a commune where everyone works toward the same goals, but spread out across the nation…and fanatical. It’s a cult. Many members do live together and seek advice/permission from leadership on everything from their household budget to whom they should marry. Members agree to submit to the leadership of a spiritual director and affirm a 181-word “covenant” that they frequently recite together. “We will serve one another and the community as a whole in all needs: spiritual, material, financial,” it reads in part. One former member of the cult said “The social scene was extremely Republican, very much Rush Limbaugh.” Nice.

For a story about the “covenant,” The New York Times attempted to interview current members of the group who didn’t respond to requests for interviews or declined to speak, citing concerns about privacy. Isn’t it special that the cult Amy Coney Barrett is a member of is concerned about PRIVACY? No, wait. They’re only concerned about the cult’s privacy.

In People of Praise, women are encouraged to work and have careers, but also to be subservient to men in a Christian tradition. Women can not hold leadership positions in the cult except as “woman leaders,” which is a position that teaches other women about their roles in the cult. Until 2017, “woman leader” was called “handmaiden.” They changed it after a TV adaptation of “A Handmaid’s Tale” gave the term a negative impression kinda in the same way Proud Boys, Oathkeepers, and Republicans eschew the term “Nazi.”

In the directory for one of the cult’s divisions in South Bend, Indiana, Amy Coney Barrett is listed as a “handmaid.” Maybe they just don’t use the term “handmaid” in public.

People are comparing this abortion ban to “A Handmaid’s Tale.” Meanwhile, we literally have a Supreme Court justice who identifies as a handmaiden. I find it incredulous that Amy Coney Barrett will ever cast a vote that would get her kicked out of this cult she’s been a member of since birth. A religious cult has a vote on the Supreme Court.

A document from the group titled “Men and Women in the People of Praise” says in one part that being the head of the household does not give a husband a license to dominate, but a wife “should take her husband’s direction seriously.” A husband’s responsibilities include “correcting” his wife should she stray from the proper path.

Of course, one of the Catholics on the court is Samuel Alito, who is writing the majority opinion banning abortions, arguing the word “abortion” is not in the Constitution. Based on that logic, everything that’s not mentioned in the Constitution from cars to airplanes to movie theaters to birth control to gay marriage to pop rocks are unconstitutional. Alito is “correcting” the Constitution and ordering the women in this nation not to stray from the proper path.

I wonder if People of Praise are as opposed to pop rocks as much as they are against gay marriage. Yes, Amy Coney Barrett believes gay marriage is a sin. Are sins constitutional? In fact, children of same-sex marriages are not allowed into the cult’s private schools. Is that sort of discrimination constitutional?

My point here is, we’re in trouble. While this decision wasn’t voted on entirely by men, you gotta take into account that the one woman voting to destroy abortion rights for women is in a male-dominated fundamentalist religious cult.

Creative note: I sketched out nine cartoons on the abortion case Thursday. And, I actually like most of them. I showed them all to Laura, one of my copy editors, and she said I should do a series and draw each one. I don’t think so but you will eventually see each of them.

Music note: I was able to listen to the entire Blue Album from Weezer while coloring this cartoon, plus six more songs from the Green Album and Maladroit.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Supreme Preggers


Conservatives roll their eyes when those of us who believe in a woman’s right to choose argue that there wouldn’t be any men opposing abortion if men could get pregnant. But, I truly believe this.

Do you honestly believe that white Christian males, the whiniest demographic in the history of whiny demographics, would be up for shooting an eight-pound baby out of their pee holes? We have nightmares about catheters and kidney stones.

I’ve heard before that if men could get pregnant that there would be abortions in ATM machines. Hell, I think they would be in vending machines and would come in assorted flavors. There would be a mint chocolate chip abortion if men could get pregnant.

You would be at a football game with your buddy when all of a sudden, he’d feel a kick and say, “I’ll be right back. I gotta go to the concession stand and get an abortion. Let me know if our team scores.” And you would just nod as a reply because it would happen so often.

Like comparing battle scars, men would compare how late into the pregnancy they got an abortion. Really? You got one in the 25th week? Ha! I got one in the 35th week.

And ya’ know what, if men could get pregnant, the word “abortion” would definitely be in the United States Constitution. It would be in there a LOT.

Sorry for the short blog but I have another deadline.

Music note: It was Prince.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: