Oval Office

Color GOP Sexy

CjonesRGB10312022

Republicans are having racist conniption fits over President Joe Biden’s pledge to nominate a black woman to fill the vacancy left on the Supreme Court by Justice Stephen Breyer’s retirement. They’re trying to mask their opposition to Biden’s promise by claiming it’s about choosing the most qualified person to sit on the highest court in the land, no matter what their race or sex may be.

Really? No.

Before Ronald Reagan was elected in 1980, he promised during his campaign that if he got a nomination to the Supreme Court, his first would be a woman. When a vacancy did come up in his first year, he kept his promise and nominated Sandra Day O’Connor. Reagan got three justices on the court, but he made four nominations. The three that made it, O’Connor, Antonin Scalia, and Anthony Kennedy, each got over 97 votes. Trump’s three steals barely got 50 each.
Reagan nominated Robert Bork who was so far right, even several Republicans voted against him. He only got 42 votes. This was back when Republicans, some of them, would refuse an unqualified and racist nominee.
Reagan’s next choice wasn’t ever formally nominated though Reagan said it was his intention to do so. Douglas Ginsburg was the choice but withdrew after it was discovered he had smoked some marijuana once upon a time. This was the 80s. Kennedy was the nominee who finally got through the Senate.

After Ruth Bader Ginsburg passed away, Trump promised to nominate a woman. Trump did nominate Amy Coney Barret but she was actually chosen by Mitch McConnell. No other candidate was vetted, or at least not seriously.

When Ronald Reagan and Donald Trump both promised to nominate a woman to the Supreme Court, Republicans howled in protest and demanded they nominate the best person, regardless of sex or race. Just kidding. There was none of that. The only real requirement for these justices was that they would be religious zealots who’d strike down abortion and recognize that guns and corporations are human beings. Two of Reagan’s picks let him down on those scores.

Today, Republicans are screaming about nominating the most qualified person and we shouldn’t even look at sex or race. But this party talking about the most qualified also put lightweight sex fiends Clarence Thomas and Brett Kavanaugh on the court.

Mississippi Senator Roger Wicker said during a radio interview, “The irony is that the supreme court is at the very time hearing cases about this sort of affirmative racial discrimination while adding someone who is the beneficiary of this sort of quota.”
He added, “The majority of the court may be saying writ large that it’s unconstitutional. We’ll see how that irony works out.” Wicker didn’t express any opinions on the constitutionality of Clarence Thomas voting on cases his wife is tied to.

The Supreme Court was founded in 1789 and it took nearly 200 years before a woman was placed on it. Of the 115 people who’ve been seated on the court, 108 have been white men. Roger Wicker now wants to yell about affirmative action? Do you honestly believe each of those 108 white men was the most qualified in their time? Being a white wan was one of the qualifications for the Supreme Court until 1967.

Without knowing who President Biden is going to nominate, Wicker said, “I think they will misinterpret the law.” Good job keeping an open mind there, Roger. Could you at least pretend?
Wicker is worried about the judgment of a person he’s judging without even knowing yet. That’s like when I knew the guys my little sister was bringing home to meet me were idiots before I met them. Except, in that case, they were all idiots.

Fortunately for Roger Wicker, Mississippi does NOT pick the most qualified for its Senate seats. Case in point: Cyndi Hyde-Smith, a woman, is the other Senator. She’s a big fan of campaigning with nooses and Confederate flags.

Wicker predicts Biden’s nomination of a black woman won’t get one Republican vote. He may be right.

Georgetown Law faculty member and former lawyer for the right-wing CATO Institute Ilya Shapiro tweeted his preferred pick, Sri Srinivasan, is Asian and “doesn’t fit into the latest intersectionality hierarchy so we’ll get a lesser black woman.”
He also tweeted Biden’s pick “will always have an asterisk attached” to her name, a kind of “affirmative action” scarlet letter on her permanent judicial record. I’ve been saying the same thing about the three goons on the court only because Vladimir Putin helped the reality TV host who nominated them to steal the Oval Office.

Florida state representative Anthony Sabatini demanded the president “be impeached for his anti-white racist exclusion of any white nominee to the Supreme Court.” Again, 108 white guys on the Supreme Court.

George Washington University legal professor Jonathan Turley tweeted that Biden’s pick will cause all kinds of “jarring and incongruous moments” because “when the justices will hear arguments on the use of race in (college) admissions, one member will have been selected initially through an exclusionary criteria of race and sex.” One member? How about Clarence Thomas, who is only on the court because he’s a black male conservative?

When did President Biden EVER state he was making his pick on an “exclusionary” criteria?

Tucker Carlson and Candace Owens have also both falsely claimed being black and female is the only qualification President Biden is seeking. Owens, who is black and female, claims she fits the bill and conservative white men have brought her name up as a nominee because they like black friends who say what they say (Candace, a former liberal, figured out there’s an industry to that). But these fuckers screaming about qualifications ignore the fact Owens is not a judge, or a lawyer, or have a bachelor’s degree, or any college degree, or is even competent at doing whatever it is she does.

Tucker, proving once again he’s a real piece of something and that conservative “humor” only relies on stupidity and vileness, said Biden should nominate the sister of George Floyd, Bridgette Floyd. He said, “she is not a judge or a lawyer or whatever, but in this case, who cares? Clearly, that’s not the point anymore…this law stuff.”

Tucker spreads racism and conspiracy theories on a supposed news network. Clearly, that’s not the point anymore…this journalism stuff.

Where were these conservatives’ howls of protests and pearl-clutching over qualifications when Reagan and Trump promised to nominate women? Where were these protests when Trump put nine judges on the federal bench that the American Bar Association rated as not qualified? Seven of them have lifetime appointments.

Of President Barack Obama’s federal appointments (that weren’t blocked by McConnell), 42 percent were women. Only 24% of Trump’s were women.

When it comes to race, Trump appointed fewer non-white judges than Obama (36%), Clinton (25%), Carter (22%), and even George W. Bush (18%). Only 16% of Trump’s judges were non-white, and he only got his percentage that high because a few of them were Oompa-Loompas.

There has NEVER been a black woman on the Supreme Court. Some of the most qualified people to serve on federal benches, including the Supreme Court are black women. If anything, being a black woman is another qualification to add on top of the rest of their qualifications. This nation is actually being robbed from a lack of diversity. Hell, Reagan even once said he wanted to put an Italian on the court, and Republicans didn’t yelp about affirmative action or asterisks.

Hell, these people didn’t like it when President Obama nominated a moderate white guy for the Supreme Court in 2016. Republicans will scream over any nomination President Biden makes. Now, they’re thinking if they pick something specific, even before they know who the person is, they can make it seem like they’re not opposing just because it’s a Democratic president’s pick. Unfortunately, that one thing they chose is racist. But this probably sells really well in Mississippi.

Biden’s pick will be more qualified than any of Trump’s three picks. And, his pick wasn’t stolen or influenced by Russia. This will be the purest confirmation to the Supreme Court since Elena Kagan, even if no Republicans vote for whomever Biden selects.

Republicans are claiming 239 years is too soon to appoint a black woman to the Supreme Court. That’s racist.

Music Note: I listened to some Beatles while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Advertisement

Putin On The Blitz

CNN01232022

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday. 

I already wrote about the subject so let me write about the cartoon. I had a great time drawing this cartoon.

I usually send several ideas in rough sketches to my editors at CNN. Occasionally, I only have to draw one. Rich was my editor this week and he said I hit it on the first try. I was really excited to draw this cartoon but also daunted that I now had to draw this cartoon.

The rough is very detailed for a rough. I was really getting into it so I drew more for it than I usually do. I considered making the final version on top of it, but I put it aside and started over. I was afraid the final version wouldn’t be as good as the rough, and that happens a lot. But I think this one came out pretty well. I especially liked the animation of it.

A colleague told me it inspired him to do more aerial views. It’s a good way to depict the Oval Office.

Music Note: There was a weird musical mix for the drawing of this cartoon, but I needed a lot to get into the crosshatching zone. I listened to Buddy Holly, Supertramp, and Sublime.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Ivanka’s Daddy

cjones07022021

If you support right-wing troglodyte asshole policies and you live in New York City, you’re not entirely on an island by yourself (See what I did there? Four of the five boroughs are literally on islands). There are plenty of Republicans in NYC. Unfortunately, those assholes are mostly in Staten Island. If you’re a Manhattan socialite who loves living high up in a tower where you can look down on everyone else, you do not want to go to Staten Island.

When you look at a map of New York City, you might wonder why Staten Island isn’t a part of New Jersey. It’s closer to New Jersey than it is to the rest of the city it belongs to. It’s the only borough without subways. It’s also the only borough that voted for Donald Trump which would explain why there are no subways. Nobody from the rest of the city wants to go there. Not even the C.H.U.D.s. And with the reputation Javanka, now knowns as “MAGA Non Grata,” built for itself as part of the Trump reign of terror, even the C.H.U.D.s won’t want to be seen with Javanka, also referred to as, “JaWannabe.”

Now there are news reports Ivanka, often called, “Bullshit Barbie,” and her husband, who New Yorkers affectionately refer to as “Skinnyman,” are trying to rehabilitate their image. It would be greatly beneficial to Javanka, nicknamed, “Dumbshit Barbie and Ken,” if we could all just pretend everything it did for the Trump administration never happened. Let’s start with Jared Kushner, who the Lincoln Project dubbed, “Secretary of Failure,” solving and bringing peace to the Middle East. That’s an easy one to remember that never happened. Jared was also referred to as “Princess Daisy Cakes.”

Remember when Donald Trump, often called, “Angry Creamsicle” ripped families apart after they crossed the border, wouldn’t allow them to ask for asylum or refugee status, and threw the babies into cages? Remember when during that time, Ivanka, commonly referred to as, “Princess Sedition,” tweeted a photo of herself and her baby with the caption, “I love Sunday mornings”? Yes, let’s forget that tone-deafness ever happened.

Remember when Ivanka, often called, “Ivanka the Terrible,” criticized Roy Moore, nicknamed “Food-Court Valentino,” for his past of trying to pick up teenage girls? Remember afterward, Daddy Donald, commonly referred to as, “Amnesty Don,” expressed huge support for the accused pedophile? Remember Ivanka, often called “Ivanka Antoinette (let them eat coronavirus)” not saying anything else on the matter? Never happened.

Remember when Ivanka, “Nepotism Barbie,” expressed support for the 24 women her claimed her father, “Gropey McGroperson,” either groped or raped them? Remember how Ivanka, “Silicone Barbie,” spoke out against her father, “Orange Julius,” over the grab-them-by-the-pussy tape? Just pretend she never spoke out about those instances because she really never did speak out. Remember how Ivanka, “Swamp Mistress,” promised to be a champion of issues important to women while she was in the White House?

It’s not just the past for years they want you to forget. They want you to stop paying attention to what’s happening now. They don’t want to be associated with the election lies being told by Daddy Trump, affectionally called “Orange Shitweasel,” “Hair Fuhrer,” “Adolf Twitler,” “Baby Fingers,” “Tiny,” “Diaper Don,” “Blitzkrieg Bozo,” “Boiled Ham In A Wig,” “Boldfinger,” “Bumbledore,” “Butternut Squash,” Captain Chaos,” “Cheeto Mussolino,” “Cinnamon Hitler,” “Creep Throat,” “Donald Tax Duck,” “Failed Mail-Order Meat Salesman,” “Reality Cheaty,” “Fascist Oompa Loompa,” “Fuckface Von Clownstick,” “Grandpa Fucko,” “Groper-in-Chief,” “Godzilla but with less foreign policy experience,” “Mussolini’s Taint,” “Screaming Carrot Demon,” “Twitler,” and “GropenFuhrer.”

Donald Trump, who some people call, “Cheddar Boy,” keeps talking about how the election was stolen from him and he’ll be reinstated in August. That is so crazy, even tone-deaf Javanka, who’s been called, “The Nordic Goddess and The Norwegian Wood Inducer,” doesn’t want to be seen in that photo-op.

Ivanka, “Little Miss Ice Princess,” went on every foreign trip her father, who I’ve heard called, “Dickhead Donald, took while he was president (sic), took. She wanted to be treated like royalty and have as much of the presidential (gag!) privileges rub off on her. She got to sit at tables with world leaders. She even sat in the president’s seat, not his lap, at summits. She got to huddle with diplomats over international issues and pretend like she knew what everyone was talking about. She got to stick her toe into North Korea just to say she’s been there. Javanka, also called, “Children of the Orange Corn,” got the opportunity to meet the Queen of England and to make sure it was seen in the windows of Buckingham Palace, which was creepier than the twins from The Shining. But now, Javanka, “Creatures of the Orange Lagoon,” don’t want to play with Donald, “White House Wanker,”…or at least be seen when they are. Give them at least a little credit for barely visiting Mar-a-Lago these days.

Did I mention they loved the royal treatment? Before leaving Washington, Daddy Trump, adoringly called, “Cheez Doodle,” made sure to extend their Secret Service protection for another six months. Why should the taxpayers stop paying for someone to open doors for Javanka, who are also called the “Shirkalocks”? Then, not wanting to be associated with Daddy Trump, “Orange Shithead Sultan,” anymore, Javanka promptly moved to Florida with him. Why didn’t it return to NYC? You know Jared, often referred to as, “Jar-Jar Jared,” still owns property there because while he worked in the White House, his buildings, like the one with the address “666,” were being financially bailed-out by oil-rich kingdoms in the Middle East. By the way, Middle East princesses would call Jared, “Finger Puppet.”

There are also reports Donald, “Herr Lugenpresse,” is jealous of Jared, also nicknamed, “FratsPutin.” No, not for that reason, you sicko perverts….well, maybe that too. But, no. Donald, often called, “Money Diaper McStupid,” jealous because Jared, whose Secret Service codename was, “Fluffy,” got a seven-figure book deal to write about his experience of helping Donald Trump, who the Brits call, “Tangerine Wankmaggot,” trash the nation for four years. Why doesn’t anyone want to pay Donald, who the Brits also call, “Witless Fucking Cocksplat,” to gaslight about the past four years?

Javanka, who many call, “Girlfriend #1 and Girlfriend #2,” wants the world to see they’re not totally bad people and for other rich people to invite them to play at the Hamptons again. They would like to visit parts of NYC that’s NOT Staten Island. Has Javanka, both born and raised in the city but often called, “Nepotism Nitwits,” ever been to Staten Island? Has Donald, “Shitler,” ever been there?

Javanka, “Polite Society Pariahs,” is trying to rehab its image. It’s even donating a week of lunches to the first responders to the collapsed condo in Miami which is only a block from its new house which it moved into after helping Trump, “Tiny-Fingered, Cheeto-Faced, Ferret-Wearing Shitgibbon,” trash the nation. Helping with something AFTER it’s collapsed is a total new experience for Javanka, who some call “Cuddlepuss.” Helping with something that’s collapsed instead of making it do so is truly a wonderful thing to…wait a minute.

Javanka, “Thing 1 and Thing 2,” live only one block from the collapsed condo? One block? That’s amazing and I’d like to point out one little factoid:

That condo never collapsed before Javanka, “spoiled rich little trust-fund babies,” moved into the neighborhood. I’m not saying we can totally blame Javanka, soon to be referred to as “inmate #167834” and “inmate 239876,”. I’m just saying.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which usually go for $45.00 each, signed. Another order will be placed soon. You may pre-order if you want. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

Watch me draw:

After MAGA

CNN01172021

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday.

I kinda expect other cartoonists to follow suit and do something similar to this. I wrote the previous sentence two days ago and now, I’ve seen about 15 cartoons like this.

This cartoon focuses on the Oval Office, but the mess Trump leaves behind, the damage he leaves behind, extends beyond the Oval Office. He damaged the presidency. He damaged the country. He promised on his first day in 2017 that “this American carnage stops here and it stops right now.” I think he confused “stop” with “start.”

Joe Biden’s first order of business will be reversing a lot of Trump fuckery, like getting us back into the Paris Climate Agreement. He’s going to mandate that face masks be worn at all federal facilities, which Trump refused to do. Biden is going to get rid of the Muslim ban. He’s going to extend a nationwide restriction on evictions and foreclosures. There are also plans to provide another stimulus worth $1.9 trillion with each taxpayer receiving a check for $1,400. I’m not going to sneeze at that.

There’s also taking over the vaccine rollout that Trump has messed up, and his call for 100 days of everyone in this nation, even the fucknuts who politicized it, wearing a face mask. At the very least, we’ll have a president who cares about the problem instead of one who pretends there isn’t one.

Biden’s biggest task will be uniting the country, and I have to admit, I’m one of those resisting that. Why do I want to unite with MAGAts? I don’t have common ground with liars, conspiracy theorists, gaslighters, and Nazis. Fuck those people. I have no use for any of them.

How does a president unite a country when the majority of Republicans believe he “stole” the election? Why would you want to “unite” with a party when nearly a majority of them support the terrorists who violently attacked the Capitol?

We don’t need to find common ground with people who are in a cult. We need to deprogram the people in a cult. How can you tell you’re in a cult? If you believe Donald Trump won the election, Joe Biden stole it, there was mass voter fraud, or “election irregularities,” you’re in a fucking cult. Instead of sitting down with a cultist for a beer or a cup of coffee, I’d rather stick their head in a toilet for 17 hours until they re-learned how to think for themselves. We can’t even talk to these people when they don’t use facts.

The job Joe Biden has to do would be a hard job for anybody. He and President Obama left Trump a booming economy, a strong military, and international respect. Donald Trump destroyed all of that…and then tried to destroy the rest of the nation. Now, Donald Trump has left Joe Biden American carnage.

I’m really glad Joe Biden and Kamala Harris are here, but to be honest, I’m mostly glad Donald Trump is gone.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have an order of 20 copies of my book (11 are left to purchase) on the way, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. The books won’t arrive until after the new year, but orders are being taken and they’ll be shipped as soon as I receive them. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

Watch me draw:

THE National Emergency

cjones01112019

Apparently, we’re under a “national emergency” that will allow Donald Trump to become a dictator. No. The emergency isn’t over the Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Breakfast Club dancing video or a congresswoman dropping an F-bomb while talking impeachment.

Trump is threatening to declare a national emergency if Democrats don’t give him $5 billion to start his racist medieval vanity project in the form of a wall on the Mexican border. This move will be an attempt to raid the Defense Department’s budget, and maybe other departments, for his $5 billion. The man who considers himself a great negotiator is acting like a hostage negotiator with him being the one holding the hostages.

Declaring a national emergency is real popular with authoritarian leaders. It’s been used recently in Turkey, Egypt, and Venezuela to expand those leaders’ powers.

Illegal immigration is not the greatest threat or challenge for the United States. In fact, the number of people illegally crossing our southern border has been steadily decreasing every year since 2007. So, why is it a national emergency now?

If it’s such a national emergency, then why does the Trump administration feel the need to create lies over it? Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen stated Friday that “over 3,000 special interest aliens” trying to enter the U.S. from the southern border had been stopped by Border Patrol agents. This is a lie. Sunday, White House spokesgoon Sarah Huckabee Sanders ignored Fox News’ Chris Wallace as he laid out facts, and she upped the lie to 4,000 stopped.

No terrorist has been found entering through our southern border. The “special interest aliens” are people stopped in airports whether it’s because they’re on the no-fly list or they just look shady. A lot of these people weren’t even arrested. How does stopping people in airports justify a national emergency to build a 2,000-mile wall on our southern border?

How does illegal immigration justify a national emergency and a southern border wall when the majority of people in this nation illegally didn’t enter through our border with Mexico?

If it’s a national emergency, then why all this over $5 billion when the wall will ultimately cost between $30 billion to $70 billion?

How is this a national emergency if Mexico is going to pay for the wall?

Experts agree that a wall is ineffective and logistically impossible. It is simply a racist vanity project that makes right-wingers and racists feel warm and squishy inside. You don’t need facts or actual results to feel warm and squishy.

A national emergency isn’t immigration. It’s war, plague, climate change, or a humanitarian crisis.

Or, a national emergency is a racist president who attacks the First Amendment, the free press, incites hate crimes, defends Nazis, and is being controlled by Vladimir Putin.

Donald Trump is THE national emergency.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Kanye Blows

cjones10152018

Whenever I come across a Trump supporter, I ask myself, “What the hell is wrong with this person?” Everything a Trump lover loves about Donald Trump is a lie. They bought a false image. Everything they claim they hate about Hillary Clinton perfectly fits Donald Trump. Everything, except for the vagina.

But, whatever is afflicting Trump sycophants has hit Kanye West with a double whammy, and then some. There’s something seriously messed up about Kanye. For this intelligent man (Yes. He is intelligent) to allow himself to be used as a prop by Donald Trump, there has to be something seriously wrong.

Yesterday, Trump entertained Kanye in the Oval Office, or maybe Kanye entertained him. Kanye talked for ten minutes and Trump didn’t speak at all. Seriously. For the first time ever, Trump was not the biggest ego sucking all the air out of the room. During Kanye’s rant, Trump had the same expression I have each time I have to watch one of his rallies.

For ten minutes, Kanye spoke without interruption about an alternate universe, Larry Hoover, growing up without a father, Superman, Saturday Night Live, Hillary’s slogan versus Trump’s slogan, his MAGA hat, the Yeezy effect, sleep deprivation, mental illness, abolishing the 13th Amendment, and hydrogen airplanes, all in one sentence.

Sitting in the Oval Office, Kanye said “bullshit” and dropped the Queen Elizabeth of all curse words, even adding the “mother” to it. He gave Trump a hug. He said the MAGA hat made him feel like Superman.

He said he couldn’t get with Hillary’s “I’m with her,” because he grew up without a father to play catch with, and Trump made him feel like a man. Sheesh. Couldn’t the guy had just found a cornfield where he could play baseball with a bunch of ghosts? It worked for Kevin Costner.

He also opened up his iPhone (I thought that stuff wasn’t allowed in the Oval) and was caught on camera typing in his password, “000000.” I’m thinking numbers in any other order would be too confusing for a Trump supporter. Hackers all over the nation immediately attacked his bank and social media accounts trying the combination “1234.” Also, since his phone was probably hacked before he finished speaking, we’re all going to see his penis by noon.

Seriously, this was extremely shameful. Instead of managing the response to Hurricane Michael, which hit the Florida panhandle Wednesday, Trump went to a rally. Yesterday, instead of dealing with the hurricane or Saudi Arabia’s murder of a journalist, he took advantage of Kanye’s mental illness for a political photo-op. That’s because Donald Trump has no shame. He is a vile, repugnant piece of human excrement. At least, we think it’s human.

Trump believes peoples are monolithic. If Kanye supports him, then that means all black people will support him. But, maybe he’s right about the monolithic thing.

If Kanye supports Trump, that means only crazy people support Trump.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Sullying The Office

cjones04062018

Donald Trump is stupid. An excellent example of this is his belief that submitting to an interview with Robert Mueller will clear his name and end the Russia Investigation. Stupid. Perhaps the only people dumber and more gullible than Trump are those who voted for him.

While it’s fun to make light of Trump’s stupidity when he tells us what uranium is, or that healthcare is hard, or about the history of China and Korea, or that nobody knows the difference between community colleges and vocational schools, it is actually dangerous to our nation. It’s especially dangerous when Trump deals with Putin.

Combine Trump’s stupidity with his man-crush for Vladimir Putin, and the next thing you know the Russian dictator will be sitting in the Oval Office with his feet on the Resolute Desk.

Trump claims he’s been tougher on Russia than Obama.

Trump refused to accept our intelligence agencies’ analysis that Russia tampered in our election. He took Putin’s word over the FBI and CIA’s. He’s worked to discredit our Justice Department while they look into his collusion with Russia.

Trump refused to enact sanctions against Russia, and when he finally did it was only because he was forced by our allies when they placed their own sanctions and expelled Russian diplomats after the poisoning in England of a former Russia spy.

Trump talked to Putin after the sanctions were placed, and he failed to mention those or the poisoning, but he did congratulate Putin on winning his sham election.

Shortly after assuming office, Trump had the Russian ambassador and foreign minister in the Oval Office, at the request of Putin. No American press was allowed, but the Russians were able to bring in their photographers and recording equipment. They even told Trump the photos wouldn’t be published. Stupid and gullible. Now, Putin is playing that for his own invite.

Usually, when we discover a new twist in the Trump/Putin relationship, we learn it from Russia. Once again, Russia has reported that Trump invited Putin to the Oval Office during the congratulatory phone call.

You can’t say you’re tough on Russia, place sanctions on them, then invite their leader over for a playdate.

What better photo-op for Putin than from inside the Oval Office? This will be a huge sign to his people, and the world, that he won the American presidency.

Is Trump dumb enough to let Putin sit at the Resolute Desk for a photo? Yes.

Here’s the video.

Please consider making a donation to keep the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. Reader contributions, small and large, really do help and are appreciated in a time of dwindling revenue for political cartoonists. You will also be supporting free speech and liberty while those in power are doing all they can to suppress it. You can also support by purchasing a signed print for $40.00. Just look at the right of this page and click the PayPal button, or you can email and make other arrangements. Thank you!

They’ll Let Anyone In Here

cjones04252017

Much has been made of the Trump administration concealing the visitors log so the public can’t see who’s leaving a trail of slime in and out of the White House. It really makes me wonder what kind of sludge they would be ashamed to be associated with if they’re sharing photos of the likes of Sarah Palin, Ted Nugent, and Kid Rock standing around Trump at the Resolute Desk. Wanna throw up yet? I’m with ya’.

These are some of those consequences of elections they talk about. Conservatives had a hard time with White House visits by Al Sharpton, Jay Z, and Beyonce. But this assortment of loons is a basket of deplorables.

Ted Nugent, whose most famous song is about “vagina grabbing,” has made veiled threats to kill Obama, who he’s also called a “subhuman mongrel.” Anyone who’s made threats toward a president, any president, should not be allowed on the White House grounds ever. He’s lucky he’s not in prison, which he said he’d be or dead if Obama was reelected in 2008. He’s not in jail and he’s still alive. He’s a hateful racist person and he gets to visit the Oval office. Nice.

We’re lucky Sarah Palin’s trip to the White House is only for a photo opportunity, and not an administration job. I guess even Trump isn’t that stupid. Perhaps she got to use her visit to share more wild conspiracy theories with the president. He eats that stuff up.

Kid Rock, like Nugent, is collecting guns. Two years ago he talked about buying guns because he believed “Obummer” was going to ban them. Conservatives loved to pull up naughty lyrics by Jay Z and Beyonce and used them as bad examples for the Obamas to associate with. I guess they don’t have any problems with Trump hanging out with a guy who described himself as a pimp selling whores. If for no other reason, I wouldn’t allow Kid Rock on the grounds for the butchering he did of “Sweet Home Alabama” AND “Werewolves Of London” which he combined into one song.

I am more concerned about who Trump puts on his staff than who comes for dinner, eats the meatloaf, tries the chocolate cake, makes a disrespectful photo with a portrait of Hillary Clinton, etc. But seriously, where is the class and dignity?

Conservatives complained about Michelle Obama baring her arms. They don’t have a problem with Palin baring her shoulders in the Oval Office, or the fact that Kid Rock and The Nuge both wore hats. Ronald Reagan and George W. wouldn’t enter the room without wearing a tie and jacket. Jeans were also banned. I suppose exceptions can be made for those who be big pimpin’.

On Thursday Trump refused to describe Kim Jong-un as unstable. The North Korean leader further enhanced his image of a crackpot a few years ago by entertaining Dennis Rodman. What sort of message is Trump sending by hanging out with this riffraff?

Trump wanted to reward Palin for endorsing him during the primaries. Despite her endorsement, he won anyway. As it turns out, Nugent and Kid Rock weren’t actually invited. The invitation was for Palin and friends. Surprising your host with those two would be like going to a party and your date is a cocaine-riddled prostitute who sneaks into the host’s bedroom and tries on all their underwear. Or even worse, a DJ.

Palin does not conduct herself in the dignified manner you’d expect from one who was a vice presidential candidate and governor of an actual state, even if that state is Alaska. Instead of class and grace Palin chooses to ride the troglodyte train with Nugent and Rock. Their pettiness was saved for posterity with the mocking photo-op by the Clinton portrait.

John F. Kennedy once hosted an event for Nobel Prize winners. During the reception he said “I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered at the White House – with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone.”

Hosting the shitter, the quitter, and the one-hitter, Donald Trump finally got the opportunity to be the smartest guy in the room.

Update and non-creative note: If I had know the “shitter, quitter, one-hitter” line would be such a hit with my friends on social media, I would have made this note earlier. I did not come up with that. I would love to give credit to who did but I snaked it from Twitter where I saw it used by several people. I don’t want credit for something I didn’t create. I did write the second half of the sentence (smartest guy in the room) but the description for Nugent, Palin, and Kid Rock is not mine.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Obama’s Exit

cjones01202017

This is the last cartoon I’ll ever draw on Barack Obama while he’s still president. It’s kinda sad. It’s also frightening. Blood curdling terrifying even.

I intended to draw something reflective of his legacy but I wasn’t really into it. Once again I went with making an attempt at humor, and hopefully to spotlight what’s blood curdling terrifying. At least one of the aspects that’s scary of a Donald Trump presidency. There’s so many.

I still haven’t really overcome the shock that Donald Trump is going to be president. It’s not that it’s as disappointing or surreal as much as it’s just really stupid. American voters aren’t any better at hiring leaders than the San Francisco 49ers.

We’re watching a man leave the Oval Office who at his very worst, is extremely reasonable, patient, competent, intelligent, and empathetic. He’s a college professor. Enter the reality television guy who insults people on Twitter, grabs vaginas and brags about it, scams poor people with a fake university, and uses money intended for charity to purchase paintings of himself.

On top of all that Donald Trump is entering the White House with the lowest approval and confidence ratings of any incoming president, and with several investigations into his dealings with Russia. When does Trump lift the sanctions on Russia? Friday afternoon or will he bask in compliments throughout the weekend and wait to do it at 3:00 AM Monday morning? Perhaps he’ll find that phone that enables the president to text the entire nation (which Bush and Obama declined to ever use) and let us know while also pitching a fit over what Alec Baldwin does Saturday night.

Donald Trump is not prepared to be president. He was surprised he had to hire a staff for the West Wing. He fired the guy leading his transition team and started from scratch after the election. His cabinet of Billionaires hasn’t been appointed yet. His Security Council hasn’t even been selected. Some of the people he has hired are racists, white nationalists and Kellyanne Conway. We’re in deep trouble.

President Obama had a very successful presidency and leaves office with higher approval ratings than Clinton and both Bush presidencies. History will be kind to him and I’m going to start missing him around 12:01 PM Friday.

One historic aspect of Obama’s presidency is that he was successful and the two presidents that sandwich his tenure were both failures. The second failure is really going to make us long for the first one.

Good bye, President Obama and thank you for your service. You told us “yes we can.” We did and then we elected an idiot. You deserve a long break and time off from the stress of the office that added so much gray to your hair and lines to your face. I do hope Obama speaks out from time to time as we’re going to need a voice of reason through our upcoming nightmare.

And Putin? He may not literally be sitting in the Oval Office at the Resolute desk, but his puppet will be.

As for Donald Trump, I hope he likes political cartoons. I’m going to be drawing a lot of them.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, etc.. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Freedom, Fear And Hummus

cjones12072015

I’m exhausted. I’m tired of the militant gun crowd screaming for more guns. I’m tired of Republicans who believe it’s OK to sell guns to people they put on the no-fly list. Mostly I’m tired of bigotry and the support it’s gaining.

Obama issued a rare Oval Office address Sunday night in attempt to beef up confidence in his handling of ISIS. He also appealed for the public to be rational toward those of the Islamic faith.

While the public has very little faith in the president’s handling of terrorism, the Republican candidates are scaring the Hell out of those who are more pragmatic.

The GOP candidates aren’t just selling fear. They’re selling hate, bigotry and outright racism. Most of them are calling for the rejection of Syrian refugees entering the country (though there hasn’t been any acts of terrorism by anyone who entered the country through the refugee process). Trump says we should kill the terrorists’ families and put mosques under surveillance. Ted Cruz wants to strip citizenship of suspected terrorists and responded to the latest mass shooting by holding a rally at a gun range. Even the most mainstream of the candidates, Jeb Bush, says we should only accept Christian refugees. Worst of all, they’re selling the fear that you’re not safe unless you own a semi-automatic weapon and carry it with you at all times.

The candidates bigotry wouldn’t be so alarming if it wasn’t gaining so much support. That’s what I’m tired of. I’m tired of people blaming Muslims and trying to smear the entire faith as violent. I’m tired of people who are only concerned with Muslim killers, but not white killers, or Christian killers.

In other news, many of the Republican candidates spoke to the Jewish Coalition. Of course they pandered. Every candidate, Republican and Democrat pander to whatever group they’re speaking to at the time. But some of these guys really got into the stereotypes. Jim Gilmore (yes, he’s still in the race) said he’s seen Schindler’s List. Jeb Bush informed the crowd that he knows what Hannukah is. Ted Cruz said a vote for Hillary is a vote for the Ayatollah to nuke Israel. John Kasich said if you want a good friend, find one who’s Jewish. Rick Santorum mentioned he worked with a Jew in the Senate. Donald Trump told them he knows how much they like their money and how good of negotiators they are. I’m shocked none of the candidates referred to Obama as a schlemiel.

The funniest part was Ben Carson who seemed to be reading directly from a Wikipedia entry. In referencing Hamas, Ben Carson pronounced it “hummus.” Apparently the good doctor has never had a conversation in his life about the Middle East and heard the proper pronunciation. Let’s just hope he never orders an appetizer of Hamas with flat bread.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!