New York

Trumpin’ The Fifth

Donald Trump testified in a court-ordered deposition yesterday in New York City, sitting across from state Attorney General Letitia James who’s been conducting a three-year civil investigation into whether he fraudulently inflated the value of his assets to secure loans and other benefits. In what The New York Times called an “unexpected twist,” Donald Trump refused to answer any of the questions, except one, and pleaded the Fifth.

It was NOT an “unexpected surprise.” So many people are shocked by Trump invoking the Fifth to questions in a court case because he’s attacked people in the past for doing the same thing. But we’ve known for decades that Donald Trump is a lying projecting racist orange hypocrite.

At one of his hate rallies in 2016 while running for the presidency with Putin’s help, he blasted aides to Hillary Clinton for exercising their constitutional right to invoke the Fifth Amendment in order to avoid self-incrimination. He said, “The mob takes the Fifth.” He asked his MAGAts rhetorically, “If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?”

At other rallies during that campaign, he said, “She lied to Congress under oath, and her staff has taken the Fifth Amendment and got immunity deals,” and “It’s worse than Watergate; it’s a bigger deal than Watergate.” And during his first debate with Hillary Clinton, he said taking the Fifth instead of answering questions was “disgraceful.”

Yesterday, Donald Trump invoked the Fifth, according to a person with inside knowledge, over 400 times. He only answered one question. His name, and we’re assuming he didn’t lie with that answer.

He opened with a prepared statement and called Ms. James, who was seated across from him, a “renegade prosecutor.”

After the deposition, he said, “I once asked, ‘If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?’ I now know the answer to that question.” He said that he was being targeted by lawyers, prosecutors, and the news media, and that left him with “absolutely no choice” but to do so.

So, does that mean Hillary Clinton (who never took the Fifth when she testified for 11 hours before the Benghazi Committee) and her staff were being targeted by lawyers, prosecutors, and the news media, or is this different?

Trump’s lawyers were smart to convince him not to answer questions because not only could have incriminated himself in the New York civil case, his fat mouth probably would have incriminated him in one of the other multitudes of ongoing investigations into Trump fuckery.

In addition to the investigation that triggered the F.B.I.’s search (stealing shit from the White House), federal prosecutors are questioning witnesses about his involvement in efforts to reverse his election loss (the coup attempt, election steal, and installing fake electors), and a district attorney in Georgia is investigating potential election interference on the part of Mr. Trump and his allies. And let’s not forget the House select committee investigating the white nationalist MAGA mob he sent to attack the Capitol.

Trump’s lawyers should get medals for being able to keep him from answering questions. It must have killed him not to shout out “fake news” or “but her emails” in response to some questions. I would also have expected him to cite an imaginary right or Trump privilege at some point of the questioning that enables him to cheat on taxes and loan applications.

It was also smart to make him plead the Fifth since it’s impossible for Donald Trump not to lie. This is a man who lied over 30,000 while he was president (sic).

But Trump citing the Fifth was not an “unexpected twist” as the Times described, because he’s done it before.

In 1990 during divorce hearings from the woman he recently planted at the first tee at Bedminster, Trump invoked the Fifth 97 times to questions that were mostly about other women. He wouldn’t admit to the court all the stuff he boasted about on an Access Hollywood bus (“grab them by the pussy”).

In 1998, after Bill Clinton admitted to his affair with Monica Lewinsky in a deposition for an investigation about an Arkansas land deal, Donald Trump, who was merely an entertaining grifter at the time, said, “I’m not even sure that he shouldn’t have just gone in and taken the Fifth Amendment.”

The only thing “unexpected” about Trump pleading the Fifth is that he was successful at it and didn’t just excrete a word salad at some point during the deposition. After the deposition, he made a complaint about how nice and expensive the Attorney General’s offices are while crime is running rampant in New York City.

Donald Trump has every right to invoke the Fifth Amendment and not incriminate himself because he has the exact same constitutional rights as the rest of us. And if he has the same constitutional rights as the rest of us, then our nation’s laws apply to him just like the rest of us.

Creative note: I get asked now and then about something a lot of readers don’t notice. When I have the same image in more than one panel, do I just copy and paste the image? Sometimes. It varies. When I don’t need them all to be exactly, I will redraw the image each time. But other times, I think the image needs to stay “mostly” consistent. It also depends on my mood and the feel of the cartoon. There are times when it’s actually easier to redraw the same image multiple times than copying and pasting.

Here’s my trick: For today’s cartoon, I drew Trump once and then copied and pasted it seven times. But, I didn’t copy and paste the finished Trump. I copied and pasted the rough. So…I went over all eight Trumps a second time with my pen. And then I added some cross-hatching and colored after that. I also redrew his hair for each panel. So, they’re not all exactly alike but they’re all in the same place.

My one rule about copying and pasting is, never to do it because it’s easier. Only do it if it’s better for the cartoon. Right after I finished typing all that, another cartoonist Facebook messaged me saying, “I admire so much that you drew all the Trumps individually in your most recent cartoon.” I should have just said, “thank you.”

Music note: I listened to two bands that blow my mind every time I listen to them, Kaiser Chiefs and Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Trump Turdlings

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A New York state judge issued a ruling Thursday that Donald Trump, Donald Trump Jr, and Ivanka Trump must sit down and face questions from investigators over potential bank fraud, tax dodging, and shady real estate values. The judge wrote in his order that they must also turn over documents, those that haven’t been flushed yet, and the three turds must sit for depositions, probably in chairs, within the next 21 days. In case you’re a Republican, 21 days is three weeks.

The Trumps are also facing other investigations, criminal and civil, in Manhattan, Washington, D.C, and Atlanta. The Trumps don’t believe they should have to provide testimony, documents, or be held accountable for anything because they’re royalty and they smell better than us lowly commoners.

New York’s attorney general Letitia James has a civil investigation that’s been going on since 2020 and she claims to have “significant evidence of financial fraud.” Eric Trump has already been forced to testify. When Eric did testify, he invoked his Fifth Amendment right over 500 times. Remember when his father claimed anyone who had to invoke the Fifth was lying and probably a member of the mafia? Yeah, good times.

Trump and his turdlings have been smearing James to distract from the case. She responded by documenting how the Trump Organization has, allegedly, faked the value of at least six of its New York state properties. Last week, the Trump Organization’s longtime outside accounting firm, Mazars, ditched them as a client stating they can’t trust the documents the Trump Organization has given them. This is yet another example of someone close to Trump saying you can’t trust him. Duh.

The state’s civil investigation is also linking up with the Manhattan District Attorney’s criminal investigation into alleged tax dodging and financial fraud by the Trump Organization.

Trump, Ivanka, and Jr. will be forced to testify about how so many family real estate development projects and properties had wildly fluctuating values that seemed high whenever they needed loans but low whenever it came time to pay taxes.

As the great John Fogerty sang:
Some folks are born silver spoon in hand
Lord, don’t they help themselves, yeah.
But when the taxman comes to the door
The house look a like a rummage sale

During the two-hour court hearing over the decision to force the Trumps to testify, part of their lawyer’s argument that they shouldn’t have to is because Hillary Clinton spied on Donald Trump. Shockingly, that lawyer wasn’t Sidney Powell, Rudy Giuliani, the MyPillow Guy, or Mr. Hanky.

Before the hearing, Eric tweeted, “On Thursday, our team will be in front of a New York Judge outlining the blatantly unethical behavior of @TishJames the NY Attorney General. There are 81 pages of videos, tweets & fundraising solicitations (some as recent as two weeks ago) in our lawsuit for the judge to see.”

It didn’t work.

Hopefully, the family that goons together goes to prison together.

Music Note: I listened to The Beatles’ Revolver album while drawing today’s cartoon. It’s probably the only Beatles album where I don’t like any of Paul’s songs.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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How You Doin’

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After making landfall in Louisiana, Hurricane Ida went to the north east and killed at least 41 people in New York and New Jersey. More people died in the northeast than where Ida landed.

New York City was not ready. The streets and subway stations flooded. Mayor Bill de Blasio blamed weather forecasters for being wrong, but they actually predicted the city could get between ten to 14 inches of rain when it actually got nine. They predicted this last Monday. The rain hit on Friday. de Blasio sucks and is a shitty mayor.

The city that never sleeps shuts down when the trains shut down. And just a couple weeks ago, some New Yorkers biggest gripe about the trains was the faux wood paneling and retro-looking orange and yellow seats.

New York was hit by Hurricane Irene in 2011 and by Hurricane Sandy in 2012. After Ida, you might have noticed these 100-year storms are becoming more frequent than every 100 years. Why is that?

It’s climate change. Funny thing about climate change. It’s like covid. It doesn’t care about your politics. While people in Louisiana are hesitant to believe in climate change and most New Yorkers have a better grasp of science, Ida didn’t care. Hurricanes will hit blue states and yee-haw states. But, because the south is on warm waters, they’ll usually be hit first because hurricanes form in warm water. Science, people.

Also, only 42 percent of Louisiana is vaccinated against covid vs 63 percent for New York. Just saying.

Climate change is real. Even pizza rat knows it. The yee-haw states need to accept facts and say “how you doin'” to science.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are FIVE copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Prisonburgh For Weisselberg

The Trump Crime Family, er, the Trump Organization was charged yesterday for running a scheme to help its executives avoid paying taxes by compensating them with benefits hidden from authorities. Its top executive, Allen Weisselberg, was also charged yesterday for not paying taxes on $1.7 million in perks that should have been reported as income.

For those of you who are Trump supporters and living in yee-haw states, let me explain this in a way you may understand: Let’s say your brother-in-law, who is also your brother, helped you paint and unclog your outhouse. Instead of giving him cash, you paid him with seven cases of Milwaukee’s Best and four packs of Beech-nut chewing tobacco. You may think that’s a big payment for unclogging the shitter, but let’s assume you don’t chew your food. Anyway, you need to report the pissy beer and chew as income and pay taxes on it. For this, I’m assuming your tax bill will be around 30 cents.

The Manhattan District Attorney’s office described it as a “weeping and audacious illegal payments scheme.” They said while the perks for Weisselberg were kept off the company’s books, they were still recorded in an internal spreadsheet. When you’re grifting, you gotta spread that shit out.

Keep in mind, if all of this is true, Weisselberg isn’t just the recipient of the company’s scheme, he would have been in charge of it as the company’s top executive. There is only one other person in the company in top of Weisselberg and his name is Donald J. Trump.

Trump had all sorts of things to say about this, calling it a “continuation of the witch hunt that started when I came down the escalator,” and accusing the district attorney and state’s attorneys of partisan politics. Authorities should have been looking into Trump after that time he came down the escalator talking about dating ten-year-olds.

Trump claims Weisselberg is innocent and is a good man. But what will Trump say if Weisselberg flips? Will he change his tune on his top executive the way he did on Michael Cohen?

With the company being charged, you can’t arrest a company. It’s not like they’re going to march Trump Tower off 5th Avenue and punish it by sending it to Staten Island. Usually when a corporation is convicted in a crime, no humans are held accountable…but the company may be broken up.

The big questions are: Will Weisselberg flip on Trump? Will Trump be charged? Will any other goons from the corporation be charged? Will Trump’s kids be charged? Who else has been paid in perks that weren’t reported as income? Will the walls to Trump Tower come tumbling down…or the walls in Mar-a-Lago, or Trump World Tower, or Bedminster, or Doral, or Turdberry?

According to reports, Weisselberg was often paid with cars and tuition for his grandchildren. Will his next payment be in the form of incarceration? This is what loyalty to Trump gets you.

Weisselberg swears he won’t flip on Trump which reminds me of something I recently watched on Netflix.

It’s a documentary about crime in New York City in the 70s and 80s. Rudy is in the documentary which is ironic since he’ll probably be in a future documentary on crime in New York City. In this documentary, the feds were sneaking into a mob-run restaurant to search and plant wiretaps, but there was a vicious dog inside the place. That dog was all like, “You’re not coming in here, assholes. This is my home. I guard this place. They pay me in pasta and meatballs. They love me and I’m loyal in return. You’ll have to kill me before you can enter this place. Oh, what you got? You got a taser, tough guy? Oh, yeah? You think a little tasing is going to make me turn against my people? I dare you to tase me…c’mon…tase me and see what happens. See what happens, motherfu….HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!…that hurt! What the hell was that? That was the taser? Why didn’t anyone ever tell me what a taser feels like? Fuck this place. You guys can do whatever you want. I’m going over to this table and I’m gonna crawl under it stay out of your way.”

And that’s what happened. That barking and growling dog who was baring his teeth got tased, turned around, and crawled under a table. The FBI did everything they wanted to in the place while the guard dog just watched. He probably even pointed out a few things. “Hey, did you check that second cabinet? Yeah, you’ll find some weird shit in there. By the way, do you know when I’ll be able to feel my nipples again?”

Weisselberg may be facing spending the rest of his life in prison if he remains loyal to Trump. I don’t know about his nipples, but that dog’s going to turn.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which usually go for $45.00 each, signed. Another order will be placed soon. You may pre-order if you want. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Fuhgeddaboudit, Giuliani

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To be honest, it wasn’t very important that I draw this cartoon. On a normal day, I try to pick the most talked about issue, or maybe the most important…or what I think readers should be talking about. And then there are days like this…where it’s just too much fun. But the reason this isn’t that important is because Andrew Giuliani has zero chances of becoming governor of New York. It’s not going to happen.

Andrew Giuliani is the son of Rudy Giuliani. Fortunately for him, his mother is not his father’s cousin. That was his first wife. Andrew first came to fame during his dad’s mayoral inauguration in 1994, when he was a child. He was repeating the oath his father was taking, blew kisses to the cameras, mimicked his father’s hand gestures, and shouted, “It should be so and it will be so!” His actions were spoofed by David Letterman and Chris Farley impersonated him on Saturday Night Live.

Over the past four years, Andrew had a position in the White House where he was Special Assistant to the President (sic) and Associate Director of the Office of Public Liaison. He was really just hired to play golf with Trump. He’s a former professional golfer. Taxpayers paid Andrew $95,000 a year to play golf with Trump. While John Kelly was Chief of Staff, he blocked Andrew’s access to the West Wing.

The only reason Giuliani got his job in the White House is because his father was Trump’s buddy and personal lawyer. Is that a conflict? Probably. Unfortunately for Andrew, no one is going to give him his next job because his daddy is Rudy Giuliani.

I’m sure in the past, being Rudy’s kid was an all-access pass to a lot of good shit. Now, it might be a hindrance. Over the past four years, Andrew’s daddy, with his crazy conspiracy theories, public farting, melting hair dye, and press conferences in the parking lots of dildo shops, is a national laughingstock.

What’s also laughable is Andrew thinks his connections to Trump and his daddy will help him in liberal New York. Sure, Governor Andrew Cuomo is in hot water with scandals over nursing home deaths and accusations of heavy flirting to sexual assault. But, if Cuomo runs for reelection, a GOP nomination of Andrew Giuliani would surely get Cuomo reelected…if he’s the Democratic nominee.

Andrew Giuliani is still thinking over the idea of running for governor. Andrew needs to think on this one really hard…if a Trump is capable of thinking hard, because he has a less chance of being governor than…

The Rent-is-too-Damn-High guy. Jimmy McMillan is a New Yorker who has run for governor, mayor of New York City, and maybe president, though he never appeared on any state ballots. During the 2010 governor’s race, he ran on the campaign of the “rent is too damn high.” A lot of people laughed at him even though they all agreed. The rent is too damn high. McMillan’s party is the Rent Is Too Damn High Party. He’s the chairman and maybe the only member. Unfortunately, McMillan is also a Trumper. Ew. But, he still has a better chance of becoming governor than Andrew Giuliani. Andrew also has less of a chance than…

Mr. Stay-Puft. Despite being sent by Gozer, (also known as Gozer the Gozerian, Gozer the Destructor, Gozer the Traveler, Volguus Zildrohar and Lord of the Sebouillia) fighting the Ghostbusters, and even stepping on a church in the process of trying to destroy the planet…Mr. Stay Puft Marshmallow Man still has a better shot at becoming governor than Andrew Giuliani. In fact, Gozer’s demi-god minions, Vinz Clortho, the Keymaster, and Zull, the Gatekeeper, have better shots than Andrew Giuliani…even if they are in the forms of ugly dogs. And if ugly doggy demi-gods have a better shot at moving to Albany than Andrew, then so does…

Anyone who has ever been honked at while walking across a street in New York City and shouted back, “I’m walking heah.” Here’s a fact: I have shouted, “We’re walking here,” in New York City. It was partly as a joke while in Manhattan while I was also being serious. While walking with Black Lives Matter, some fuckers started dropping water bottles on the protesters. So, I shouted, “We’re walking here” which a lot of fellow marchers approved of. The cops just shrugged off that we were being assaulted by dropped water bottles. Another fun fact: I’ve never seen the movie, “Midnight Cowboy.” My proofer, Laura, mentioned that movie while finding the boo-boos in today’s cartoon, and I thought she was referencing the other cowboy in this cartoon, who also has better odds of becoming governor than Andrew Giuliani. Who? I’m talking about the…

Naked Cowboy. Robert Burck is the Naked Cowboy. He busks in Times Square where fortunately, he’s not really naked. He is wearing tighty-whities though which isn’t much better. He’s also a former porn star, presidential candidate for the Tea Party and…ugh…a Trumper. Still though, he has a better shot than Andrew just like…

Anyone playing for the Mets has a better shot…despite the fact the Mets suck. When asking where to take a very smart girl on a date, Ross Geller told Joey Tribbiani to take her to the Met to which Joey replied, “The Mets suck. You wanna see the Yankees.” Unfortunately for Joey, Ross was talking about the Metropolitan Museum of Art. But, Joey would still be a better governor than Andrew…even with a campaign of “How you doin’?” and “Joey doesn’t share food.” Even Joey’s duck has a better chance than Andrew…just like…

Whoever’s making the boneheaded decisions for The New York Jets. These guys drafted a quarterback in the first round three years ago…whom they just traded so they can draft another quarterback in the first round. The Jets haven’t had a first-round pick for a QB work out since 1965. Whoever’s running the Jets this week, or next, has a better shot at becoming governor than Andrew. But maybe the job of running the Jets should be taken over by someone else who can also beat Andrew, and that would be…

Pizza Rat. Pizza Rat couldn’t make worse calls for the Jets, is more likeable than any Giuliani, and knows a good slice when he sees one. Did you know New York City is the third most rat-infested city in the nation? They probably dropped from first place after the Trumps moved to Florida. Also, Pizza Rat knows how to eat a slice while Donald Trump does not and chose to use a knife and fork while dining with Sarah Palin. Pizza Rat probably has better dining partners than Trump too. Who lives near Pizza Rat, would make a better dining partner, and has a better shot at becoming governor than Andrew Giuliani? Why none other than…

C.H.U.D. What? What’s a C.H.U.D? Who’s a C.H.U.D? Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers are former humans who were mutated by radioactive materials illegally disposed of in the sewers. They’re nasty. They were the basis of a cult 1980s movie. Their main legacy may be slang for when you’re about to go out with someone, and your friend replies, “Girl, you don’t wanna date him. He’s a total C.H.U.D.” If someone thinks you look like a C.H.U.D, it’s not good. Though if you called Andrew Giuliani a “C.H.U.D,” C.H.U.D. would probably find that insulting. Still, being called a “C.H.U.D.” is better than getting, “girl, you don’t wanna go out with him. He’s a total Matt Gaetz.”

Every time I have ever used the word, “C.H.U.D,” I’ve had to explain it. Even in Manhattan to guys going down into the sewers.

While strolling near Times Square, after having a slice I did NOT eat with a knife and fork or steal from a rat, I saw some workers going into the sewers and I said, “Watch out for C.H.U.D.s!” They just looked at me like I was weird. One of the workers asked, “What’s a Chud?” I said, “You know…the movie? C.H.U.D? Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers?” I just got blank stares. It seems to me that if your job entails going into New York City sewers, then you wanna be familiar with C.H.U.D….who also has a better shot at becoming governor than Andrew Giuliani…and better dates than Matt Gaetz.

Also, why do Andrew Giuliani, Eric Trump, and Matt Gaetz all have the same teeth? People who draw caricatures notice these things.

Creative note: I drew a rough of this last Thursday and showed it to CNN, knowing we weren’t going to use it because it’s not a big issue. But, we had a lot of fun with it exchanging emails back and forth on the cartoon. One of my editors suggested I use Mr. Stay-Puft.

I was originally going to draw and publish this Sunday, but it was a lot of work. So I drew and published something else yesterday and then got to work on the lettering and template for this cartoon. When I woke up, I just had to draw it…and ended up changing a few more things. Also, I kinda wish I had used George Costanza somewhere. I could have used, “I won a contest.”

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have FIVE copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Gopher His Balls

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When Donald Trump was running for president in 2016, he promised he would release his taxes returns to the public. He repeated the promise over and over while not delivering on it. After he won the election, he said screw it and that nobody could see them, nobody had the right, and claimed the public was OK with it because they had elected him without seeing them in the first place, ignoring that the majority of voters did not vote for him.

One of Trump’s excuses for not showing his taxes was that he was under audit. He was always under audit and lied that you can’t show your taxes to the public during an audit…despite the fact other presidents and candidates have done that.

Over time, some of his taxes leaked here and there and there are mysteries. Mysteries like, how did someone get so rich while losing so much money? How many porn stars has he paid off? Are hair transplants a tax-deductible expense? How can you pay someone as a consultant while they’re also an employee and your daughter? And how can you claim in tax filings that a property has lost money while claiming its value has increased in loan applications? It boggles the mind.

What else boggles the mind is why so many were OK with Donald Trump hiding his income and the sources. Trump supporters loved to brag Donald Trump is a billionaire, almost as much Trump loved to make that brag. They argued him being rich was good for all of us because he’d use his business smarts in the interest of the country and soon, we’ll all be rich. Yay.

Yeah, that didn’t happen. Most poor white people don’t think they’re poor. They think they’re rich but the money just hasn’t come in yet. And as it turns out, Trump’s business smarts is all in grifting.

The thing is, maybe it’s important to understand how someone obtained their wealth. I mean, do you want a guy in office who got his wealth through fraud? Why don’t we just vote for mobsters? Or, do you think it’s an achievement when someone inherits wealth? As it turns out, Donald Trump did both. And when it came to debt, Donald Trump does understand personal and business debt. Government debt, not so much. Also, he didn’t care. His first big achievement was driving the deficit up to give himself a huge tax cut.

But when someone is in office and they’re still being paid from other sources, don’t you want to see what those sources are? Don’t you want to see who he owes money to? Don’t you want to know why Putin owns him? Don’t you want to understand that him not taking a salary while charging you for his golf outings is all a shell game? No? Because you’re a cult? OK, then.

I saw a post yesterday by someone highly upset the Supreme Court would dare hand Trump’s tax returns over to prosecutors. That’s some real sycophancy right there. You would have thought the government had audited Jesus.

Donald Trump has spent years bragging about his tax returns…and he’s spent years hiding them. He’s also been fighting New York prosecutors over access to them. Yesterday, the Supreme Court, with three Trump appointees on the bench (two stolen, one borrowed) allowed the Manhattan District Attorney to have access to Trump’s taxes.

Now, we’re going to find out about all those deductions for income losses while claiming property value has risen. We’re going to find out why he paid his daughter as an adviser while she was also an employee. We’re going to find out if he should be audited for a $72 million deduction he claimed. We’re going to find out if he should only have paid $750.00 in a tax year. We should find out how many porn stars he paid off.

Will we see these taxes? Yes, we will. No, we’re not supposed to and they probably won’t be seen from the DA’s office until they use it as evidence in a trial. But if Congress gets their hands on them, they’ll be leaked faster than Trump on a porn star. And it won’t even be the Democrats leaking the taxes. It’ll be Republicans.

The Republican Party is openly kissing Donald Trump’s ass while they secretly want him to go away. When they get his taxes, they’ll be leaked. Republicans have a more vested interest in destroying Donald Trump now than Democrats do.

Donald Trump is corrupt and he’s a cheater. This is a man who stole from charity and once swiped a child’s golf ball after the kid made a better shot than he did. Donald Trump is immoral without any principles. Hopefully, this is the beginning for Donald Trump to finally be held accountable.

Donald Trump wants four more years in the White House. I want at least four years for him in prison.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have NINE copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Oh No, Cuomo

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Yesterday, a got an email from an editor in Georgia telling me since there are so many liberal cartoonists, that I should stop drawing liberal cartoons and start drawing conservative ones. This cartoon is not a response to that because I have a bit of integrity. As CNN’s Jake Tapper said regarding this story, “indecent behavior is indecent behavior, regardless of party.”

This may come as a huge shock to you since I am such a left-wing liberal, but I’m not tribal. I’m not partisan. I’m not a member of the Democratic Party. Corruption from Democrats is just as bad as corruption from Republicans.

If I was a conservative cartoonist, I would be jumping all over this while claiming the death rates from the coronavirus are all made up, except in New York, and that Donald Trump shouldn’t be blamed for anything in handling the pandemic. But I’m not a conservative cartoonist. I try to apply the same standards to both parties. If you’re a conservative cartoonist and you’re jumping on Cuomo but ignoring the failures of Florida’s governor, Ron DeSantis, you suck as a cartoonist.

I like the governor of New York, Andrew Cuomo. He receives a lot of criticism from liberals but I’ve always respected how outspoken and forward he’s come across. During the pandemic, he seemed to be the one political leader delivering straight information, not just to his New York constituents, but to the entire nation. Even though it seemed he made some bad calls regarding nursing homes in his state, he was still coming across as a politician taking the pandemic seriously while the president (sic) was talking about TV ratings and ingesting bleach.

In the early days of the pandemic, Governor Cuomo made a decision to send nursing home patients who had tested positive with the virus back to their nursing homes, in order to make much needed space in hospitals. It was an extremely bad call. More than 9,000 who tested positive were sent back. Over 10,000, many likely infected by the returning patients, died. The Attorney General of New York, Letitia James, said in a report last month that the true total is thousands higher. And now, we have found out there was an ongoing coverup in place.

Melissa DeRosa, one of the governor’s top aides, told Democratic lawmakers in the state that the Cuomo administration rebuffed requests from the Justice Department and state legislature for updated figures for deaths in nursing homes because of fear of a potential federal investigation. She said the administration “froze” when initially asked by state legislators back in August about the issue.

As it turns out, the administration undercounted deaths, possibly by 50%. There are calls in the state, and from Democrats who control the state legislature, to strip Governor Cuomo of his emergency powers that were given to him at the start of this pandemic. It gets worse. There are calls for Cuomo’s impeachment.

I can understand the Cuomo administration not wanting to give the Trump Justice Department anything that would have them investigated by corrupt people, in addition to being politicized by Donald Trump. Who wants to help with that? But you can’t hide deaths. Cuomo did exactly what Donald Trump did, which was undercount deaths. It’s bad when Trump does it. It’s just as bad as when Cuomo does it.

You cannot hide information, especially regarding deaths, because it looks bad on you, or you’ll get in trouble, or it’ll hurt you politically. Mistakes are one thing, coverups are entirely worse.

There needs to be an investigation of this, especially now that Donald Trump doesn’t control the Justice Department. The Biden administration should give this just as much attention as it would if it was a Republican governor.

I feel kinda bad because my last cartoon also contained a cemetery. That one, criticizing Republicans for letting Donald Trump off the hook, has been shared over 1,800 times on Facebook. This cartoon has been on Facebook for over 40 minutes and it’s received zero shares. We can’t always be partisan and tribal. We need to be responsible. Criticizing Andrew Cuomo over this proves we were being serious the last four years when we were criticizing Donald Trump.

Democratic corruption is just as bad as Republican corruption…even if it doesn’t happen as much.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have an order of 20 copies of my book (11 are left to purchase) on the way, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. The books won’t arrive until after the new year, but orders are being taken and they’ll be shipped as soon as I receive them. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Grim SCOTUS

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The biggest takeaway from the Supreme Court’s ruling that churches in New York can remain open, because placing restrictions on them is infringing upon their Constitutionally-protected religious freedom, is where the court will be years from now.

The court ruled on similar cases just a few months ago, and ruled 5-4, with Chief Justice John Roberts joining the liberals, that the government can place restrictions on churches. On Wednesday night, it was another 5-4 ruling, this time in favor of the churches and again, with Roberts joining the liberals.

The big takeaway here is that Amy Coney Barrett was the vote putting it over the top. The last time the court voted on this, Ruth Bader Ginsburg was on the court and actually understood the case.

The argument here is that New York Governor, Andrew Cuomo, was being harder on churches than places like retail businesses. But the thing is, it’s not the same.

You don’t go to a grocery store to spend two hours parking your ass in one spot. You do that in church. It’s not comparable. The churches are complaining that Cuomo is singling them out for their religion.

Nobody cares about your religion other than to protect it. I don’t care if you go to mass for seven hours every night, dance in circles with snakes while speaking in tongues. You do you. But, I do care if you go to church and bring back your virus to the grocery store. Do you understand how that works? No?

Neither do five members of the Supreme Court.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. And since someone asked this morning, yes. You can still get a signed print for $40.

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Defund The NRA

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The National Rifle Association has been a very secretive organization for decades. They won’t publicize their funding or even how many members they have, but there is one thing we know about them. They’re evil incarnate.

For years, the lobbying group has controlled the Republican Party (also evil) and has succeeded in blocking even the lightest of gun regulations. As more and more Americans die from gun violence each year, including children from mass shootings at their schools, the NRA pushes for more guns in our society.

The NRA has advocated for semi-automatic weapons over the lives of children for years. The NRA has blood on its hands. The NRA labels every proposed gun regulation as an attack on the 2nd Amendment. The NRA has positioned itself as the 2nd Amendment. And for years, like every gun nut on the internet, the NRA ignores the part of the 2nd Amendment that mentions “regulated.”

The 2nd Amendment is the most sacred part of the Constitution to Republicans as they describe themselves as Constitutionalists and argue the Amendment shouldn’t be touched. But if they could, they’d take out the word “regulated.” Of course, the 2nd Amendment is the only amendment they’ve read.

Now, the state of New York is going to war with the National Rifle Association. New York isn’t just looking to put a hurting on the NRA. New York is out to obliterate the NRA.

New York Attorney General Letitia James filed a 168-page lawsuit with the state Supreme Court seeking to dissolve the NRA and claimed four of its top officials “funneled millions into their own pockets” and described the NRA as “a breeding ground for greed, abuse, and brazen illegality.”

The suit was followed by another by the Attorney General of Washington, D.C., who filed suit against the N.R.A. and its charitable foundation, alleging the NRA misused millions of dollars of the foundation’s funds. So the NRA has a charity…just like Donald Trump did.

It’s funny how Republicans chastised the Clinton Foundation for years as corrupt, without ever having proof. Today, the NRA is being sued for corruption and the Trump Foundation doesn’t exist anymore.

The NRA is countersuing New York, claiming its 1st Amendment rights are being attacked and the lawsuit is entirely political. Proving the 2nd Amendment is the only one they’ve read, there is nothing in the 1st that grants you the right to steal money.

The NRA was chartered as a non-profit in New York state 148 years ago though their headquarters are in Virginia outside the capital. The four top dogs in the NRA being sued are Wayne LaPierre, the longtime chief executive, John Frazer, the organization’s general counsel; Josh Powell, a former top lieutenant of LaPierre; and Wilson Phillips (not the 80’s group that sang “Hold on for one more day,” but that might be appropriate here), a former chief financial officer.

LaPierre is accused of raiding N.R.A. funds to bankroll an extravagant lifestyle, even after being paid millions in salary and benefits.

The suit says over six and a half years, a personal travel consultant for LaPierre was paid $13.5 million, largely on no-bid contracts. Private flights were chartered for LaPierre’s wife and his niece. He took frequent trips to the Bahamas on the N.R.A.’s dime, often decamping to a 108-foot yacht called “Illusions” (how appropriate) that was owned by an N.R.A. contractor and included a chef and four staterooms. He lavished gifts from Neiman Marcus and Bergdorf Goodman on his inner circle, and once put his niece up at a Four Seasons hotel for eight nights at a cost of more than $12,000.

The suit says the executives enriched themselves, their friends, families, and allies, and took improper actions that cost the organization $64 million over three years. The lawsuit seeks to ban the executives from EVER again serving on nonprofit boards in the state of New York. Hmm. Just like Donald Trump and his three oldest kids after using their fake charity in similar corrupt manners.

This is a civil suit and the state’s AG has referred it to the IRS. There may be a criminal referral in the future. They should probably keep their eyes on LaPierre who likes to visit the Bahamas a lot. We have an extradition treaty with that country, right? Psst. We do.

The NRA is evil. It’s so evil, Russia is a big advocate for it. Why would Russia, a nation with strict gun control laws, send spies to infiltrate the NRA? Because Russia knows the organization helps destabilize the United States. There are still investigations into whether the NRA was used by Russia to funnel money into Donald Trump’s 2016 presidential campaign.

Leading up to the 2016 election, the NRA was a Russian asset.

Donald Trump said about the investigation, “That’s a very terrible thing that just happened The N.R.A. should move to Texas and lead a very good and beautiful life.” The word “Beautiful” is one of Donald Trump’s big words which is included in nearly every Donald Trump statement but at least he didn’t pronounce Texas as “Thexas.” By the way, the NRA can’t move its organization while it’s under investigation.

In the past, the state Attorney General referred to the NRA as a “terrorist organization.” They do support easy access to gun by terrorists. In fact, they’ve lobbied to defend a terrorist’s rights to get guns.

LaPierre is also said to have secured for himself, without board approval, a post-employment contract worth more than $17 million. This guy has used the NRA to enrich himself, just like Donald Trump used his bogus charity to enrich himself. What will we learn next? That LaPierre used NRA funds to buy portraits of himself and Tim Tebow-signed football helmets?

The Attorney General’s office took down the Trump Foundation. It took down Trump University. Now, it’s gunning (pun intended) for the National Rifle Association.

Could we actually see the dissolving of two evil organizations in one year? This would be a much safer nation, to itself and the world, with the destruction of the NRA and the Trump administration.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

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Cuomo Vs. Trump

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Here’s your cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

New York Governor Andrew Cuomo has been criticized throughout his political career for being blunt and too direct. During a pandemic, that’s an asset.

Cuomo’s daily press conferences are carried live by CNN. You don’t have to be a citizen of New York to find his briefings helpful and informative. What he’s laying out is important to everyone in the nation. Andrew Cuomo is the right man for the job at this time. Then there’s Donald Trump who is the wrong man at the wrong time.

Donald Trump has always been the wrong man. He shouldn’t be president and he’s only in the White House because all the stars aligned in all the wrong places at all the wrong moments. It’s sucked to watch him disparage the office with his actions and behavior. It’s been painful watching him make lifetime appointments to courts with fucknuts, racists, troglodytes, and rapists. It’s been embarrassing watching a president tweet at Saturday Night Live, Meryl Streep, and Gold Star families over petty issues. It’s disgraceful to watch him attack allies while praising dictators. It’s been humiliating for a nation to watch a president open his mouth and confirm his stupidity, ignorance, sexism, and rank racism to the entire world. Now, his fawning over himself and protecting his petty ego is killing people.

While the nation needs to watch Andrew Cuomo’s daily press conferences, it should ignore Donald Trump’s. At one of these conferences, Trump yelled at a reporter for asking if he had a message to Americans who are afraid. At another, he heckled a reporter for Bloomberg News over Michael Bloomberg’s failed presidential campaign. He asked how Bloomberg was doing. I think it would have been worth that journalist losing his White House credentials by replying, “He’s still richer than you.” It doesn’t bother Trump that people are dying, but it bothers him that Bloomberg, or anyone else, is richer than he is.

Donald Trump has lied, downplayed, and been in denial over the pandemic. Today, he boasted about the ratings of his press conferences. He shouldn’t be looking at his ratings numbers. He should be looking at the number of deaths.

Soon, the United States will have more deaths from this “Chinese” virus than China. In case you’re a Republican, you already know the coronavirus originated in China because Donald Trump has called it the “Chinese virus.” Being racist yourself, you’ve joined in and have also called it the “Wuhan Virus” and “Kung Flu.” What you probably didn’t know is that China has more people than the United States. We shouldn’t have more deaths from this virus than China.

Andrew Cuomo has taken responsibility. Donald Trump has stated he refuses to take any responsibility. Donald Trump wants everyone to thank him for his job performance with the coronavirus.  For every single death in the United States, Donald Trump is responsible. We can thank him for that.

Tip Jar:

This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From 

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