ISIS

Trump’s Turkey Letter


cjones10192019

Warren Harding was not a good president. Even during his term, he was regarded as a failed president and that perception remains with today’s historians who rank him among the worst. His administration was visionless, ineffectual and corrupt. He slashed immigration quotas, appointed his cronies, one of whom accepted bribes from oil companies in what became known as the Teapot Dome scandal, and brought an end to the reform-minded eras of his predecessors. He had a lover on the side to whom he wrote letters to in which he referred to his penis as Jerry. The Republican Party, concerned that the affair wouldn’t just expose Harding as a cheater but that his lover supported Germany in World War I, paid her an amount that would be nearly $300,000 today in hush money. The RNC even paid for her and her husband to go on a lengthy trip to Japan, and Harding himself offered her $5,000 a year as long as he was in public service. Corruption, mistresses, hush money, ending reforms, scaling back immigration, weird penis story, etc. Does any of this sound familiar?

Harding did not belong in the presidency, but at least he wasn’t oblivious to that fact as he once conceded, “I am not fit for this office and should never have been here.”

Donald Trump is not fit for his office and he shouldn’t be there. But, unlike Harding, he doesn’t know it. In fact, he tells us he’s a “stable genius,” has “unmatched wisdom,” and boasts of imaginary accomplishments that “only he” could have accomplished.

Donald Trump is stupid. He’s also a man-child. When Hillary Clinton called him “Putin’s Puppet,” his retort was, “You’re the puppet.” Yesterday, after a failed meeting with Congressional leaders over Syria, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said he had a “meltdown.” His retort this time? She had the “meltdown.” She said she “prays for his health,” and he tweeted, “Nancy Pelosi needs help fast! There is either something wrong with her ‘upstairs,’ or she just plain doesn’t like our great Country. She had a total meltdown in the White House today. It was very sad to watch. Pray for her, she is a very sick person!” If Pelosi had called him a “poopy head,” he would have replied she’s a “poopy head.” I hope he’s never in a rap battle (actually, I think I would like to see that).

Trump later tweeted out a photo of the meeting he thought would make him look good to his base. In it, Pelosi is standing at a table, fully occupied by men, directly across from Trump, seemingly confronting him. Instead of it humiliating her, she made it her header photo on Twitter. It’s like the time I bought a water pistol to scold my dog with, and he ended up barking for more sprays from the water pistol (maybe we should try the water pistol technique on Trump).

In another act of obliviousness, Trump proudly distributed a letter he wrote to Turkish president Recip Erdogan, which reads like it was written by a third-grader on Adderall.

Upon seeing the letter on Facebook, I thought, that’s good satire. It sounds just like something he would write, or in his case, dictate. Though, they may have gone over the top with the stupidity…oh wait….that shit’s real? Even the press had to check with the White House to see if it was genuine. To everyone’s astonishment, the White House confirmed its authenticity. Have you ever turned on TV news to see every anchor with their mouths hanging open? This is an actual letter from one world leader to another and not some drama-filled vague Facebook post from one teen to another about checking out her boyfriend (I have nieces. I’ve seen these)?

In it, Trump says, “Let’s make a deal” and he further warns that he’ll destroy Turkey’s economy if a deal isn’t made over the Kurds whom he abandoned like a first or second wife. He tells Erdogan he doesn’t want to be “responsible for the slaughter of thousands of people” and that history will look “favorably” on him if he gets it done the “right and humane” way. Or, that it’ll look upon him “forever as the devil if good things don’t happen,” like how it’ll look on Republicans still supporting Trump after they see this rambling trainwreck of a letter. He further warns Erdogan, “don’t be a tough guy,” and “don’t be a fool!” then strangest of all, sums it up with, “I’ll call you.”

Donald Trump doesn’t just need to be impeached. He needs to be checked into a facility where he can receive help. I don’t mean that to insult or attack him. There’s something wrong with him.

Trump also tweeted his high approval rating within the GOP base, seemingly aware Republicans may be flaking, as two-thirds of House Republicans voted in favor of a resolution condemning his decision to pull United States troops out of Syria. There are reports several Republicans are privately expressing they’re tired of dealing with Trump. There are fears in the White House that a Senate trial could actually be a disaster for him, as each day reveals new details of his corruption while he continues to exhibit a mental disorder.

Impeaching Trump as punishment is all well and good, but that’s the least of it. He needs to be removed because if not, he will continue to endanger this nation. The man is a Russian asset and a national security risk (he even revealed we have nukes in Turkey, which goes against a longstanding government policy of not saying where they are. Next, he’ll tweet the codes).

Donald Trump doesn’t know how to be president, let alone a rational, stable adult. Republicans who continue to support him don’t know how to be Americans.

Donald Trump is not fit for this office and he doesn’t belong here.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

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Kurds Get Trumped


cjones10112019

Donald Trump is not just a risk to our national security. He’s a risk for the world’s security.

Trump has a good argument about America being in “forever wars,” like Afghanistan. He’s not the first to make the argument as it’s one that’s been carried by Republicans and Democrats alike. But pulling our troops out of Kurdish-held northern Syria isn’t removing us from a “forever war,” as most of the fighting on our behalf has been done by Syrian Kurds. They’ve fought with our equipment and training to defeat ISIS.

This is where it gets tricky. The Kurds are holding about 11,000 ISIS fighters. Trump says Turkey must now take responsibility for those prisoners. They also operate camps for families displaced by the war, holding tends of thousands of people. Many of them are non-Syrian wives and children of ISIS fighters.

Turkey does not like the Kurds. They have been fighting separatist Kurds inside their borders for years and consider all Kurdish fighters, including our allies, the Syrian Kurds, to be terrorists. Turkey is planning to invade Northern Syria after the U.S. removes its protection of the Kurds.

Syria’s dictator, who the Kurds have also been fighting, along with ISIS while they’ve been fighting ISIS (told you it’s confusing), controls the southern half of Syria. President Bashar al-Assad is backed by Putin and he wants to retake northern Syria. He’s looking to make a deal with the Kurds. Russia also has troops in Syria.

On Monday, a bipartisan group of lawmakers issued a joint statement saying, “If Turkey attacks these Kurdish soldiers, there is a grave risk that the ISIS fighters they guard will escape and return to the battlefield.” Susan Rice, the former national security adviser for President Obama, told Stephen Colbert, “This is batshit crazy.” Trump’s former UN ambassador Nikki Haley said we’re leaving the Syrian Kurds “to die.” Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell came out of his shell and said this will benefit the Syrian regime, Iran, and Russia.” Even Lindsey Graham, who usually resides in Donald Trump’s butt, said this is “complete chaos” and a “disaster.” The butt, however, according to Lindsey, is nice this time of year.

This is America bailing on an ally after they helped us defeat ISIS. Already, there are reports of Turkish artillery shelling and airstrikes on Syrian Kurdish positions. Trump made the decision after a phone call with Turkish President Recep Erdogan, probably after Erdogan promised dirt on Hunter Biden.

The White House said Turkey would “now be responsible for all ISIS fighters in the area captured over the past two years.” Turkey replied, “Yeah, uh-huh. Right.”

The United States has a long history of abandoning the Kurds. President Richard Nixon helped foment a Kurdish uprising in Iraq to fight Iran. But after Iran and Iraq mended fences in 1975, we turned out back on the insurrection and left them to be slaughtered and driven into exile. In 1991, George H.W. Bush called on Iraqis to rise up against dictator Saddam Hussien. After we were done with Desert Storm, we abandoned the Kurds again and Saddam crushed them. Last August, the Trump administration convinced the Kurds to pull back from the Turkish border and dismantle their fortifications. Now, with those fortifications dismantled, Donald Trump has given Turkey the green light to invade northern Syria.

Trump’s former top diplomat in the war against ISIS, Brett McGurk tweeted, “The value of an American handshake is depreciating.” Plus with Trump, you don’t know where that hand’s been.

Hearing the criticism and concern over Turkey’s intentions, Trump tweeted yesterday, “If Turkey does anything that I, in my great and unmatched wisdom, consider to be off limits, I will totally destroy and obliterate the Economy of Turkey (I’ve done before!).” Well, shoot. I guess we were all concerned about nothing because we still have Trump’s “great and unmatched wisdom” to take care of things. If nothing else, he’ll destroy Turkey’s economy like he did before which nobody remembers happening.

The conflict of interest in this crisis should also be noted. There are Trump Towers in Istanbul (in case you’re a Republican, Istanbul is in Turkey). Trump’s proud of these towers and said in 2015, “It’s called Trump Towers. Two towers instead of one. Not the usual one. It’s two.” Unfortunately for the Kurds, they don’t even have one Trump Tower.

We are bailing on our allies and proving to the world we can’t be trusted. Our next president, unless it’s Mike Pence, will have to rebuild that trust. Someone said, “Don’t forget, that’s their territory. We have to help them. They fought with us. They died. We lost tens of thousands of Kurds, died fighting ISIS. They died for us and with us. And for themselves. They died for themselves. They’re great people. And we have not forgotten. We don’t forget.” In case you can’t tell from that sentence structure, Donald Trump said that. He said it last year and, I think he forgot.

All these world leaders who throw Trump parades, flattery, visits to secret cities, sword dances, and promise investigations based on conspiracy theories on his political opponents need to keep in mind, Trump is not loyal. But for us, when Trump bails on an ally, it’s not just his reputation he’s harming. He’s making America look bad. Sure, world leaders in the future will realize our next president fully understands two towers is more than one tower, but they’ll remember we’re the idiots who put an orange idiot in the White House.

We need to show the world that we can do one thing right and that is impeaching Donald Trump because he’s bringing America’s credibility down to his level. And in case you’re a Republican, his level is a sewer.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Prez For The Caliphate


cjones11042017

Every president from FDR to Obama, (and yes, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, even Kennedy AND JFK) responded to attacks on our country by uniting the nation. Roosevelt didn’t blame Republicans when Japan attacked Pearl Harbor. George W. Bush didn’t throw petty insults and lies at Nancy Pelosi when al Qaida hit the World Trade Center. When a terrorist killed 49 people at the Pulse nightclub, Obama didn’t use the occasion to remind us Ted Cruz is a hideous human being from Canada.

Donald Trump is a president who doesn’t know how to be president. That’s because he’s not supposed to be president. He especially doesn’t know how to react to traumatic events in his life, from a terrorist shooting over 50 people in Las Vegas to Kristen Stewart cheating on Robert Pattinson. The man totally wigs out and loses his shit and his only response is to be as petty as he can possibly be.

ISIS does not expect to destroy our nation by killing eight people on bicycles in New York City by running over them with a rental truck from Home Depot (who still probably had a better week with national exposure than Papa John’s). Their goal is for us to use that to destroy ourselves. Terrorists failed at making us destroy ourselves over 9/11 and they have failed at every attempt since. Now, they have a president who will play into their hands. They have a true puppet in Donald Trump. Putin will have to share him.

After losing the cities of Mosul and Raqqa, ISIS rejoices at an American president who uses one of their attacks to attack his political opponents. It’s probably even better the president lies when he does it.

The president’s responses to attacks have been political, divisive, and outright stupid. As a candidate, his response to the Pulse nightclub shootings was to congratulate himself for predicting it. For San Bernardino, he called for a ban on Muslims entering the nation (as he did for Pulse). We can’t forget his response to the death of a young woman by racists in Charlottesville, when he said “good people” were marching with Nazis.

After Las Vegas, the White House told us not to politicize it, and they haven’t talked about any legislation to prevent similar attacks in the future. Less than eighteen hours after the attack in New York City, Trump is calling for an end to the “Diversary” Visa Lottery  program for immigrants.

This is a system that offers citizens of countries with low immigration rates a chance to come to the United States. The NYC killer entered the nation seven years ago from Uzbekistan as a beneficiary of the program.

The Visa program issues up to 50,000 green cards a year, which is a tiny fraction of the more than one million who receive them. Applicants don’t require a sponsor, must pass a background check, have a high school diploma, and have two years of recent work experience. Citizens of Mexico, Canada, Brazil, China and other nations that have sent at least 50,000 people to the United States in the past five years are not eligible. The intention is to mix up our melting pot, which you don’t do by letting Nickelback stay here.

Trump ignored the facts Wednesday when he tweeted, “we need to get rid of the lottery program as soon as possible.” He also attacked New York Senator and Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer with, “The terrorist came into our country through what is called the ‘Diversity Visa Lottery Program,’ a Chuck Schumer beauty. I want merit based.”

Schumer helped create the program in 1990, and it passed with bipartisan support and was signed into law by President George H.W. Bush. In recent years, he’s worked on legislation that would reduce the number of immigrants, thus ending the Lottery program.

Trump isn’t interested in the details. He needs something stupid for Huckabee Sanders to defend. Kellyanne Conway will surely double-down on the stupidity later today on CNN, and Sebastian Gorka will most likely follow the talking points on Fox News while also doing his creepy vampire routine. Bleah. Bleah. Bleah.

As others have pointed out, the president is very slow in criticizing white people who kill people. Sometimes, he compliments them, as if Putin sent them over. When the perpetrator is brown, he unleashes his Twitter Kraken.

I really miss having an adult as president and I’m tired of being stuck with an illiterate racist child who emboldens terrorists.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Send In The Clown


cjones10132016

Many believe the greatest threat to the United States is ISIS. Others say Climate Change. Recently you’ve probably read more about people freaking out about clowns. Scary clowns. Creepy clowns.

I don’t get this fad. I don’t think anyone does. I think a news organization needs to find a clown and interview him to find out what’s going on. The clown panic has reached a point that McDonald’s is keeping their mascot, Ronald McDonald, out of their publicity until this clown fear passes. I don’t think anyone’s going to miss Ronald. He spends way too much time with little kids.

If I’m confused about this then how confused can people outside the U.S. be when they hear we have a clown epidemic? Will ISIS start recruiting clowns? Will this embolden terrorists when they see it doesn’t take much to send us into a panic?

I wanted to take a break from the election for at least a minute, unless Mayor McCheese gets impeached for supporting creepy Ronald.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Great Scott He Found ISIS!


cjones08122016

Mankind will never develop time-traveling technology. We know this because Donald Trump was not smothered in his sleep as a child.

Donald Trump keeps making crazy claims and political pundits keep analyzing them to understand why he would make such statements, totally forgetting that Mr. Trump is not a rational person.

Donald Trump claims Barack Obama founded ISIS and they honor him. He says Hillary Clinton is the co-founder. It takes a pathological liar to make such stupid, false, statements while giving his opponent a nickname “lying Hillary.”

ISIS formed from invading Iraq, while Obama was a state senator in Illinois. If the baby daddy for ISIS is an American, his name is George W. Bush. The sugar mama would be Dick Cheney. Invading Iraq is another area Trump lies about as he states he was against it. The pathological liar who tells us he saw videos of Muslims in New Jersey celebrating 9/11 (another lie) ignores the existence of the recording of him supporting the invasion.

This kind of B.S. might actually work with Trump’s base. This man first leveled the charge that Obama was not born in the United States, that he didn’t have a birth certificate, and later if he did then there was something on it he didn’t want anyone to see. A large portion of Republicans believe this lie. Many believe the president is a secret Muslim, and Trump is helping that by pushing Obama’s middle name “Hussein” while leveling the ISIS charge.

Blaming the president for ISIS, and insinuating he’s part of the terrorist organization, isn’t just false, it’s stupid. It’s as stupid as blaming Obama for the response for Hurricane Katrina, which a third of Louisiana Republicans do despite George W. Bush being president during that time.

There’s legitimate criticism for the way the president has handled Iraq and ISIS. Blaming him for creating it is a lie and irresponsible, especially for the presidential nominee for one of the two major political parties. The nominee should work with facts and information instead of right-wing conspiracy theories being fed to him by the tin-foil hat wearing electorate.

But hey, maybe Trump has it on good authority that Obama is the founder of ISIS. Perhaps he read it when the NFL sent him a letter.

I was a teenager during the 1980s and I really don’t look back on all the fads fondly. Leg warmers, Reaganomics, Max Headroom, Rubiks Cube, Atari, Nintendo, arcades, Hulkamania, Valley Girls (gag me with a spoon!) Cabbage Patch Kids, boom boxes, break dancing, Where’s The Beef, Madonna, Thriller, Purple Rain, Born In The USA, synthesizers and electronic drums on every pop song. I’ll never forget the nightmare of New Coke. Sons of bitches!

One bright spot of the decade was the film Back To The Future. It’s still awesome but depressing to realize the year they jumped to in the future was 2015 and Biff Tannen is actually running for president. Damn I’m old.

Useless trivia time: The album in the 1980s that shot British hard rockers Def Leppard to fame, Pyromania, consisted of electronic drums for most of the album. I just burst a bubble for you, didn’t I?

You may already know this one, but if you don’t you’ll find it, as Marty McFly would say, “heavy.” The original actor hired to play Marty was Eric Stoltz (who did a great job in the Mask and later as Lance in Pulp Fiction). Director Robert Zemeckis pursued Michael J. Fox for the role, who was already a big star at the time, but couldn’t commit due to his TV series Family Ties. So they went with Stoltz and even started filming. After four weeks they realized Stoltz was miscast as he very dramatic as McFly. Marty McFly was basically who Michael J. Fox was in high school as during that time he chased girls, played in bands, and even skateboarded. He just needed the script. Stoltz actually agreed he wasn’t right for the part.

Eric Stoltz did kick ass in Pulp Fiction as heroin selling Lance (“The day that I bring an OD-ing bitch over to your house, then I give her the shot”).

By the way, Zemeckis and Fox teamed up again years later for The Frighteners. It’s not nearly as good as Back To The Future, but it’s still good. Check it out. Michael J. Fox saw dead people way before Bruce Willis did.

Update: After spending two days doubling down on accusing Obama and Clinton of being the founders of ISIS, Donald Trump now says he was being sarcastic.

Trump gave an interview on a radio show where conservative host Hugh Hewitt gave him a chance to clarify his accusation. Hewitt suggested Trump meant to say that Obama “created a vacuum” in the Middle East that led to ISIS. Trump replied “No, I meant that he’s the founder of ISIS. “He was the most valuable player. I gave him the most valuable player award.”

Trump’s usual gaggle of surrogates on cable news backed him up and continued the lie. The surrogates now have more spinning to do as Trump tweeted this morning that he was “being sarcastic.”

 

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How’s My Driving?


cjones07182016

It takes a special kind of monster to kill a child. Ten children were among the 84 killed in Nice by a terrorist, apparently inspired by ISIS.

Before you can get over the shock of a terrorists attack there’s another one. Orlando, Turkey, Dallas, Nice, etc. I waited a couple days to draw this cartoon and I’m kinda surprised another attack didn’t preempt it.

Terrorists are creative. They’ve discovered ways to incite fear beyond shooting guns and conventional explosives. They fly planes into buildings, build bombs into their shoes, create explosive crock pots, and drive large trucks through crowds.

The attack in Nice is one that can happen anywhere, especially in the United States. We have more roads and automobiles than anyone. A terrorist wouldn’t have to wait for a holiday to attract a large crowd. He could just wait for a beautiful day in a large city.  It’s hard to anticipate something that’s never happened before.

While we can’t defeat terrorism overnight, we can learn from what created it, and perhaps not repeat those mistakes. Mistakes like invading and destabilizing other nations.

While ISIS recruits and encourages followers they’ve never met, some of their disciples are offering examples how to be involved. The bad guys can’t be the only ones learning. We better take note too.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

The McCain Blame


cjones06192016

On Thursday Senator John McCain blamed President Obama for creating ISIS and having a hand in the attack in Orlando. I guess he forgot about that entire episode where President Bush invaded the wrong country, destabilizing it and creating a world class recruitment center and haven for terrorists. It must have slipped his mind.

After accusing the president of treason and coming off as ridiculous as Donald Trump, McCain attempted to clarify his statement. He said his intention was to blame Obama’s policies, not as if Obama was personally cutting off journalists’ heads in the desert outside Raqqa.

McCain is in a tough primary race for his senate seat in Arizona. Now may not be the best time for him to make stupid statements. To retain his seat he needs to distance himself as far as possible from Donald Trump, not mimic him. What’s McCain’s next move, a photo op with a taco bowl while accusing himself of not being a war hero?

Before McCain picked a running mate in his failed presidential attempt in 2008, nobody outside Alaska has ever heard of Sarah Palin. Since that time we’ve suffered eight years of a tidal wave of stupidity that even Donald Trump has had trouble duplicating. Thanks, Senator. It’s the stupid that keeps on giving.

Speaking of stupid, Sarah Palin also had some criticism of President Obama this week. She probably does that every week but this one was noticeable. She said the president is a “special kind of stupid” over his efforts toward gun control. Seriously. Miss Right Winger Bitter Clinger has called someone else stupid. Next, her daughter will start lecturing about abstinence.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!