Clay Jones

Churchill, FDR…Trump?


cjones09162020

If you want to be compared to great people, then do great things. If you do that, then other people will compare you to great people and you won’t have to do it yourself.

That’s exactly why Donald Trump has to compare himself to greatness…because nobody else will. At it stands now, some of the most popular nicknames for Trump are Hair Fuhrer, Twitler, and Il Douchey.

After it was revealed Donald Trump intentionally downplayed the coronavirus and continued lying to the public, he defended himself by saying he didn’t want people to panic. Some of his own people, like spokesgoon Kayleigh McEnany, said he didn’t downplay it while he’s on the Woodward recording literally saying he was likes downplaying it and will continue to do so.

Donald Trump is arguing that “downplaying” the dangers of the virus, like telling people it was less dangerous than the flu even though he knew that was a huge and dangerous lie, was real leadership. Why, it was leadership on the scale of Winston Churchill and Franklin Delano Roosevelt during World War II.

Donald Trump made the argument, that he was protecting the public, ironically at a Trump rally which always turns out to be covid parties. Donald Trump will kill you, like he killed Herman Cain, to stay in power.

What Donald Trump is doing is trying to absolve himself of culpability in the death of over 190,000 Americans. Another great leader, President Teddy Roosevelt, said, “The buck stops here.” With Trump, the buck is pushed onto someone else to pay.

Barking at his hate rally like he tends to do, Trump compared himself to the greatness of Churchill and FDR, while lying. The thing is, those two leaders leveled with their people.

Sure, when at war, you don’t tell the public everything, but Americans knew Japan caused huge damage at Pearl Harbor and thousands of sailors were dead. The English knew of the huge retreat at Dunkirk and there was no hiding the Blitz, the German bombing campaign of England.

Comparing himself to Churchill, the barking lunatic said, “We have to be calm. We don’t want to be crazed lunatics. … When Hitler was bombing London, Churchill, a great leader, would oftentimes go to a roof in London and speak. And he always spoke with calmness.”

No. Churchill did observe the bombings from a rooftop at times, but he never gave a speech during them. Hey, can everybody ignore the bombings for a minute and listen to what I have to say? I assure you, it’ll be calm and eloquent. Also, “crazed lunatics?” What sort of lunatics should we be?

If you want a real comparison between Churchill and Twitler, I mean Trump…Churchill went to the rooftops while Nazis were dropping bombs on his city. When there were loud protesters outside the White House, Donald Trump hid in the bunker. Later he said he was only “inspecting” it, which is what a teenage boy says when he gets caught doing you know what in the shower.

In 1940, Churchill told his people, “”We have before us many, many long months of struggle and suffering.” Donald Trump told us the virus would disappear by April and “anyone who needs a test gets a test.” Donald Trump called it a “Democratic hoax.” Donald Trump said it wasn’t worse than the flu. Donald Trump told us kids are “virtually immune.” Donald Trump told us to drink bleach.

Instead of telling us we have “many long months of struggle and suffering,” Trump told us to go shopping, go to church, go to school, and go to political hate rallies.

FDR told us, “The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” With pardoned Trump goon Roger Stone saying Donald Trump should declare martial law and arrest all his enemies if he loses the election, the biggest thing we have to fear now is Cheeto Hitler retaining power by any means necessary.

Donald Trump told Bob Woodward he likes dictators more than democratically-elected leaders. That alone should tell you we don’t want Trump to have a second term.

Donald Trump pales in comparison to leaders like Churchill, FDR, Teddy Roosevelt, Lincoln, and even Ronald Reagan. His favorite president, racist murdering Andrew Jackson, tells you all you need to know.

Who you can compare Trump to are people like Hitler, Mussolini, Idi Amin, Kim Jong Un, Saddam Hussein, and Muammar Gaddafi.

Donald Trump is no Churchill. He’s no FDR. If he retains power, he’ll become America’s first dictator.

Correction: It was President Harry Truman who said, “The buck stops here,” not Teddy Roosevelt. I knew that so I don’t know why I mucked it up. Shout-out to Shari for the correction in an email.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Roughing It, Volume 63


Time for roughs from last week.

I might be the only cartoonist in the world who enjoys drawing crowds.

CNN picked this for their opinion newsletter.

And I forgot to put “MAGA” on the caps. D’oh! It’s not the first time.

I really liked this one so I went with it.

This got a lot of play on social media, and about as much as the new Facebook format would allow.

The hits to my site are way down since Facebook redesigned which means Facebook is preventing people from seeing my posts (probably because they want to pay to promote the posts). And, they did it at the same time WordPress did a redesign. I hate both of them.

And WordPress, in case you’re reading this, I think the new format for posting is pointless. The site looks the same but creating each blog post requires more steps. It’s very cumbersome and it makes me hate you which you already know from the email I sent with all the F-bombs.

Sorry for that rant. Let’s move on.

And, before it only took two steps to post an image. Now it takes five. I’m sorry. I’ll move on now. This rough was withheld from you last week because I thought I’d draw it this week. I didn’t. So, let me post it for you here now. I still may go back and do it. So, prepare for maybe seeing it again in a finished cartoon.

I think this might be the one rough that’s everyone’s favorite. We’ll see.

Now this is a little cumbersome.

I knew I wasn’t going to finish this but it was fun. I did a full-color sketch of Trump in his high heels and predicted other cartoonists would start including them. Last week, I saw one by Bill Bramhall from The New York Daily News. No, he didn’t copy me. He’s the kind of cartoonist who catches things like that. I’m a fan.

I kinda dug this one.

Those flapping bat goons are supposed to be Rudy and Stephen Miller. This one still makes me laugh. I just realized it reminds me of an old Bugs Bunny cartoon where he does this to a vampire.

OK. Which cartoons is your favorite?

Hey, Hey, Hater Kansas City


cjones09152020

I know from the history of this website that I have readers who don’t watch football. I know. Crazy. I once had a reader tell me I should go into more depth to explain who Tom Brady is. But anyway, let me give the backstory to this.

Fans of the Kansas City Chiefs are racist assholes. There. Backstory done.

No? OK. I’ll provide more information.

In case you’re a Republican, Kansas City, where the Chiefs of the National Football League play, is in Missouri. It’s not in Kansas like Donald Trump believes. Seriously. But anyway, Thursday night was the kickoff to the new NFL season. While most game won’t have fans in attendance, the Chiefs allowed about 17,000 into the 60,000 plus stadium to watch the game. And during a moment of unity, the fans booed.

What? Who boos unity? Apparently, Kansas City boos unity.

Let’s get something straight here. To believe in unity is to believe in peace. To believe we’re all equal and should have the same civil rights, opportunities, and equality is not a crazy Democratic Party, radical-left, foie gras-eating, Birkenstock-wearing, long-haired hippy, commie ideal. It shouldn’t be political to believe we should all get along. It shouldn’t be partisan to think our children should live in a world where they’ll never experience hate directed at them.

After it was announced that in addition to the national anthem being performed before the game, that “Lift Every Voice and Sing,” considered to be the black national anthem, would also be performed, conservatives became outraged. How weird is that? If they weren’t told it was the black national anthem, they would have been fine with it. I’ll bet you a hairy nickel they wouldn’t have been outraged if the song being added was “Sweet Home, Alabama.”

Basically, these people are saying they’re done with the NFL because the league wants to be nice to black people. Donald Trump yells it’s why the ratings are going down.

Before, these jerks were outraged at Colin Kaepernick for kneeling during the national anthem and lied claiming he was disrespecting our troops when he was really taking a knee for equality and against racism and oppression.

Donald Trump, the leader of the racist conservative asshole movement in the United States doesn’t believe white privilege or systemic racism exists and that anyone who does has “drank the Kool-Aid.”

But in Kansas City, they took it a step further by booing unity. When the players of both teams locked arms for a moment of silence, it wasn’t silent. The crowd booed. Conservatives aren’t happy with loud protests or silent protests. So, when can we protest against racism? Oh, never? Yeah, that’s it. Donald Trump teargassed a peaceful crowd for protesting racism.

The Chiefs fans didn’t boo kneeling during the national anthem. They didn’t boo a statement like, “Defund the police.” They didn’t boo a giant picture of George Floyd. They didn’t boo the organization Black Lives Matter. They didn’t boo someone saying, “Black lives matter.” They booed equality. They booed peace. You would have thought from the boos that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez was singing “Say It Loud, I’m Black and I’m Proud” while burning a pile of cheeseburgers and standing on an American flag.

But no, These fuckers were booing something anti-racist. It’s like they’re saying, “Hey, we’ll keep our racism, thank you very much.”

Booing unity is like booing puppies, tacos, and sandwiches. Puppies, tacos, and sandwiches are awesome. Everybody likes puppies, tacos, and sandwiches. But then again, the leader of the racist conservative asshole movement doesn’t like puppies, eats his tacos in a bowl, and only eats sandwiches from McDonald’s.

Last year, I was very happy for the coach of the Chiefs, Andry Reid. They won the Super Bowl and it was a long time coming for the old coach. I think Patrick Mahomes is the best quarterback in the league and he’s an awesome kid. But, I will be rooting against the Chiefs this year. I’m not so much rooting against the Chiefs as I am against Chiefs fans.

You booed unity, Kansas City. What the hell is wrong with you to boo unity?

Boo, Chiefs fans. They’re a bunch of racist jerks.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

MAGAt Love


cjones09142020

For the past two days, a MAGAt has been posting on my YouTube channel that Donald Trump “has the best foreign policy anyone alive has ever seen.” That’s some serious MAGAt love right there.

From Bob Woodward’s new book about Donald Trump, he gives us a look at the “love letters” from Kim Jong Un to Donald Trump. It was Trump who described these as “love letters.” He thinks they’re beautiful. And if you’re wondering how Bob Woodward gained access to these letters, he got them through Donald Trump (who also gave him some national security secrets). Woodward was not allowed to copy the letters so I assume he was able to memorize them. He’s a smart guy.

In one letter, Kim wrote, “I cannot forget that moment of history when I firmly held Your Excellency’s hand at that beautiful and sacred location as the whole world watched with great interest and hope to relive the honor of that day.”

He described their Singapore summit as “reminiscent of a scene from a fantasy film.”

He once wrote, “My regards also to the First Lady and the rest of your family and all your people, and I wish everyone good health and happiness and hope that everyone’s dream will become a beautiful reality.”

And then it gets creepy. “Every minute we shared 103 days ago in Hanoi was also a moment of glory that remains a precious memory.”

He described their relationship as a “deep and special friendship between us will work as a magical force.” Sheesh. Get a room already.

Donald Trump told Bob Woodward that Kim called President Obama an “asshole,” which surely was a way to get on Trump’s good side. He also described to Trump the murder of his uncle by firing squad in graphic detail. For some reason, Kim thought Trump would get off on that. He was probably right. And if I have to read another one of these “love letters,” I may request a firing a squad.

And what have we as a nation gotten out of the Trump/Kim relationship? Well, Kim did return three hostages to us, but then again, President Obama (you know, that “asshole”) got North Korea to release ten hostages. In case you’re a MAGAt, ten is more than three.

We also haven’t engaged in a nuclear war with North Korea thanks to their “deep and special friendship that works as a magical force.” But I just remembered, we never engaged in a nuclear war with North Korea before Trump either.

Donald Trump did get Kim Jong Un to sign a treaty that guarantees…well, nothing actually. It’s a bunch of promises that they’ll maybe possibly consider doing things that we’d like them to do very much eventually. Really.

Donald Trump pulled us from the Iran nuclear treaty which was a lot stronger than the empty one-page treaty he signed with North Korea that promises kinda sorta maybes. Thanks to Trump’s foreign policy, Iran will eventually create a nuclear weapon.

Thanks to Donald Trump’s foreign policy, the climate will become even worse because he pulled us from the Paris Climate Accord. Climate change is actually a greater threat to our nation than stuff like immigration and Antifa. Really.

Donald Trump has coddled dictators and tyrants while disparaging our NATO allies. If he’s reelected, he’ll most likely pull us out of NATO and get a hotel room with Putin.

Donald Trump started a trade war with China which was stupid.

Donald Trump has ignored Vladimir Putin placing bounties on our troops, poisoning dissidents, and attacking our elections…but you can rest easy because he declared Canadian cheese a threat to our national security.

Now that we’ve seen the love letters from Kim Jong Un, I want to see the love letters from Donald Trump. I want to see what he’s written to Kim but more importantly, I want to see the love letters he’s written to Vladimir Putin. If Donald Trump was so desperate to impress Bob Woodward, oh my god what has he told Putin?

After reading them, I’ll probably throw up in my mouth.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Widespread Panic


cjones09132020

Donald Trump’s excuse for lying to the public about the realities of the coronavirus is that he didn’t want to cause a panic. That’s what he told Bob Woodward on the tapes. That’s what Kayleigh McEnany told us yesterday. And that’s what Trump repeated and claimed was leadership. But those of us who live in reality have already been panicking since election night in 2016.

After Bob Woodward’s book “Fear” came out without any cooperation from Donald Trump, he decided to be interviewed for the next one. For “Rage,” Donald Trump gave 18 interviews. He agreed to be recorded. As it turns out, he’d often call Woodward late at night, probably right after he got off the phone with Sean Hannity.

It’s not shocking Donald Trump would lie to us. I even saw that as a defense from one fucknut on social media yesterday. What’s shocking is that Donald Trump totally understood the dangers of the virus, that it was worse than the flu, it was airborne, it was dangerous to children, and that he admitted all of that to Bob Woodward on tape. Yes, Donald Trump agreed to be recorded.

Kayleigh McEnany defended Donald Trump yesterday and argued he never downplayed the virus. The problem here for Ms. McEnany, who swore on her first day on the job as Donald Trump’s spokesgoon that she’d never lie to us, is that on the recording, Donald Trump says he’s “downplaying” it and he likes “downplaying” it.

OK. Let’s accept that for a second. He didn’t want to cause a panic. That makes it sound as if he was genuinely concerned for the public’s safety…even though he acted irresponsibly. But, if he had the public’s safety in mind, then why did he continue to hold Trump rallies? Trump held five rallies after his confession to Woodward that the virus was more dangerous than the flu. He put thousands of lives at risk. His friend, Herman Cain died after a rally. Donald Trump continues to politicize and mock people for wearing face masks. He pushed states to reopen. He screamed for people to pack churches. He campaigned to put kids back in schools. He continued to describe it as the flu. Donald Trump disregarded your and your family’s safety.

Donald Trump didn’t just keep information to himself. He lied about it. He claimed it was the “Democrats new hoax.” He said it’d disappear by April. He said, “Everyone who needs a test, gets a test.”

We knew how dangerous the virus was. Donald Trump didn’t know anything we didn’t know already. But, his lying about it fed his base bullshit. His base doesn’t listen to facts. They only listen to Trump. If Donald Trump had acted more swiftly in March to shut down factories, schools, and stopped conducting rallies…and maybe had told his people to wear face masks instead of tweeting out, “Liberate Michigan,” it would have saved thousands of lives.

From calling service members “losers and suckers,” to disclosures that intelligence on Russian meddling was withheld to save him from embarrassment, to withholding information on a virus and costing more lives, each day contains more revelations that Donald Trump is the worst president in American history.

Woodward’s new book also reveals people closest to Donald Trump believe he’s a disaster. Former Defense Secretary James Mattis called Trump “dangerous” and “unfit.” Dan Coats, former director of national intelligence, wanted to take “collective action” and speak out publicly against Trump. Coats also said Trump “doesn’t know the difference between the truth and a lie” and believed the Russians had something on Trump.

Dr. Anthony Fauci told Woodward Trump’s attention span is like a “minus number.”

Donald Trump’s son-in-law, Jared Kushner told people the book “Alice in Wonderland” can help them understand the Trump presidency, and described him as the Cheshire Cat. This was Kushner speaking positively about Trump.

Also in the book, Trump said, “My fucking generals are a bunch of pussies” who care more about military alliances than trade deals. He also rejected having any white privilege and accused Woodward of “drinking the Kool-Aid” for believing in systemic racism.

Yesterday, I saw a post from a Trump supporter attempting to defend the revelations that Trump was lying about the virus. He, trying to be clever, “marked himself safe from Donald Trump not creating a panic.” I like he used that because it shows what Trump conservatives find humorous and clever. But it was a huge fail at being clever as it also shows how obtuse and stupid Trumplicans are because there’s over 190,000 who can’t “mark themselves safe” from the Donald Trump presidency.

What Donald Trump did was irresponsible, negligent, careless, and criminal. He betrayed the American people. Protecting the American people is job number one for a president. Donald Trump failed. Donald Trump only protects Donald Trump.

Donald Trump doesn’t care about creating a panic except when he cares enough to create a panic. He’s been fear mongering since 2015. He runs on panic. Panic is all he has.

If you really want to avoid creating a panic, then don’t put a stupid racist narcissistic reality TV show host into the White House.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Woodward Strikes Again


cjones09122020

What’s more shocking? That Donald Trump withheld that he understood fully well just how dangerous the conoravirus was while he was playing it down to the rest of the nation…or that Donald Trump understood something fully well?

This is a bonus cartoon and more information is coming out about this. I want to learn more, and wait for more reactions, before I write a lot about it. I owe you a blog on this. 

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Latinos For Trump


cjones09112020

Donald Trump is doing better with Hispanic and Latino voters than he did four years ago. What? After four years of “shithole” countries, building a wall, ICE raids, ripping families apart, forcing children to defend themselves in immigration court, and putting babies in cages, his approval is up with Latinos?

Joe Biden is leading with the Hispanic/Latino vote by 20 percent, but that’s nationally. In Florida, Donald Trump leads Biden among Hispanics/Latinos by two to four points, depending on the poll. In Miami-Dade County, where Donald Trump lost the Hispanic/Latino vote by 30 percent in 2016, he’s leading now by a point. In 2016, Hillary Clinton won two thirds of that vote in Florida.

In Florida and Arizona, Hispanic/Latino voters make up 20 percent of the population. This is an extremely important vote to win.

So, why is racist “A Mexican judge isn’t fit to judge me” Donald Trump doing so well with this demographic? It’s kinda like the evangelical vote in a way where you have supposed Christians supporting an accused rapist and friend of pedophiles. Or, it’s like Trump still doing well with military families even after saying a POW is only a hero because he got captured and “I like people who weren’t captured.” It doesn’t make any sense, does it?

Where Donald Trump is doing well is with Hispanics and Latinos who are evangelical and a generation removed from immigration. Basically, just like most Trump voters, it’s all about them and they don’t care about other people. He’s also doing well with his anti-socialism message with those of Cuban and Venezuelan descent. The bullshit fear thing is working on a large segment of them.

This could be just in time for Donald Trump as his support among older white Americans, suburbanites, and the military is thinning.

You can argue these Hispanic and Latino Trump supporters are voting against their best interest and they’re morons, But the way I see it, all Trump supporters are voting against their best interests and are morons. Donald Trump is destroying this nation and that affects all of us, white, black, brown, etc. The only people who should be excited about Donald Trump are billionaire assholes, anti-abortion zealots, Russians, and his stupid kids who will become even richer billionaire assholes.

Some people point out that the black supporters who speak out publicly for Donald Trump are kinda nuts, like Michael “The Black Man” who would show up behind Trump at his rallies holding a sign reading, “Blacks for Trump.” But it’s not black or brown Trump supporters who are fucknuts. All Trump supporters are fucknuts. All Trump supporters are vile petty selfish little shitweasels who only care about themselves. They don’t care about this country and they definitely don’t give two shits about the world they’ll leave for future generations.

Joe Biden has focused more on the black vote, but now he’s directing more attention to the Hispanic/Latino vote because if he doesn’t, it could cost him the presidency. While he leads Trump nationally by 20 points, Clinton was up by 38. And while Biden is leading Trump in Texas by ten, Clinton beat him by 27. Joe has some work to do. Winning Florida or Arizona could deliver Biden the presidency. If he actually gets both, I predict he wins the White House.

Donald Trump doing well with Hispanics is as messed up and bizarre as him being nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize by a Norwegian. What? That just happened? Shit.

But, that Norwegian is a white supremacist who believes hijabs are the equivalent of KKK robes. Hey, Latino Americans…what’s your excuse?

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Dumbkirk


cjones09092020

To show their support for their Dear Leader and orange messiah, Trump cultists with boats have been staging “boat parades.” And these Trumplicans don’t have both oars in the water.

The Facebook page for the Travis County, Texas Fucknut Flotilla stated, “Decorate your boats in patriotic colors and fly as many Trump flags as she can handle! Let’s really make a statement!” Good job on the statement. 

I have several questions: Are life jackets as political as face masks? Can racists swim? Does denial stop your boat from sinking any better than it stops a pandemic? Can a MyPillow work as a flotation device?

Five of these boats in the asshole armada sank. Fortunately, no one died or was seriously injured. The real good news for the Trump fuckers is it’s not the cause of climate change. Nope. It’s from stupidity. Boats leave a wake. They create turbulence. They make tides. You get a bunch of these boats together and what you get are sinking boats. The waves knock them around, fill them with water, and the next thing you know, you need flippers and snorkels.

The local sheriffs department received 15 calls about sinking shitweasels’ ships. A local towing company said they received three more calls. Ultimately, five of these fuckers’ hater boats sank. Three were recovered. Two are still on the floor of the lake scaring fish.

They can’t blame China, Hillary, or Obama. Maybe God hates boats…or better yet, maybe God hates Trump boats. What I’m hoping for mostly is that this is a metaphor for what’s to come.

Will there be another blue wave? Will Trump sink in November? Are Trump supporters all wet? Do any of Trump’s arguments hold water? 

These “Trumptillas” were started in Florida last May. The first one had around 1,500 boats. And the guy who hosted and organized this event, was arrested and charged for issuing a written threat to another man over wearing face masks. 

Of course, another problem for Trump and his cultists is they all have tiny dinghies.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Facemask Losers


CNN09062020

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday.

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi violated California state law when she went to a hair salon and at least for a minute, didn’t wear a face mask.

A video was released of her walking from one room to the other without the mask. Pelosi claims it was a setup as she called the salon, where she’s been a customer for years, and an employee told her to come in.

Pelosi is responsible for this. She should have known the state law and she should have worn a face mask for the entire visit. But that said, yeah, it was a setup. How do I know it was a setup? Because we’ve seen the video.

In fact, White House spokesgoon Kayleigh McEnany began a press briefing about the video and ran it on a loop for several minutes. The thing about this is, it shouldn’t be the White House promoting and advancing this video. It’s bad politics. What they should do is just let their conservative allies do it. Yeah, it’s still hypocritical and stupid, but at least they could have the semblance of keeping their hands clean and government employees like Kayleigh McEnany wouldn’t have to conduct herself like a goon.

But which is it? Are we supposed to be upset at someone for not wearing a mask for a minute or are we supposed to mock people who wear masks?

Look at the Republican convention. There were two nights where the Trump team created crowds, one at Fort McHenry in Baltimore and the other on the South Lawn. Not only did these two acts violate the Hatch Act and abuse public property for partisan political events, they didn’t practice social distancing. Face masks were not required. You have to remember the last time Trump put together a huge party for a political event, it killed Herman Cain, who, by the way, they failed to mention once during their four-nights of lies and bullshit.

Last week, Donald Trump mocked Joe Biden for wearing a mask. Trump said, “Did you ever see a man who likes a mask as much as him?. It gives him a feeling of security.”

Then, the guy who should be in a padded room while wearing a jacket that ties in the back said, “If I were a psychiatrist — right? I’d say, this guy’s got some big issues. Hanging down.” Hanging down? What the hell is that? Anyway…

So far in this pandemic, due to a virus Donald Trump has ignored at times and downplayed at others, has killed nearly 185,000 Americans. So, why the hell is he mocking someone for wearing a face mask which is recommended by the Center for Disease Control and the White House Coronavirus Task Force?

What’s next? Making fun of people who have died from it? Calling them weak or better yet for Trump, losers?

Donald Trump is the president (sic) of the United States. Every time someone says “President Trump,” my skin crawls because it’s the most disgusting thing there is…but he is the president (sic). Yet, he can’t be presidential. He can’t exhibit leadership. Joe Biden can. Joe Biden is being presidential.

Joe Biden is demonstrating by example, showing leadership, and taking the virus seriously. Donald Trump finds that something to mock.

Donald Trump refuses to be president for the entire nation. He refuses to be a leader in the same way he refuses to be an adult, mature, responsible, accountable, or credible.

Wearing face masks saves lives. Experts predict fewer deaths and a quicker end to this pandemic if we all wore face masks. Donald Trump is politicizing it and making fun of people for wearing face masks.

Wearing a face mask is the patriotic thing to do. But then again, we all know how Donald Trump feels about patriotism.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Roughing It, Volume 62


Here are a few roughs from the previous week.

CNNrough935

This is the rough for the cartoon I drew for last week’s CNN Opinion newsletter.

CNN08302020

I originally had the number at 2 million, but they changed late last Friday night. I figured they might change again so I took out the specific total. Still, Biden beat Trump when to Trump, ratings are so important…except when they’re not. Oh yeah, Trump has called these ratings “fake news.” If Trump can’t accept ratings results, how is he going to accept the election results if he loses?

See…because Trump lies. Get it? Never mind.

CNNrough936

All around them is supposed to be a nation being destroyed while their convention is being presented from a bubble. I took a few shots at this.

I really liked this one but I was also afraid of it. Why? Because drawing it would have been extremely hard. Looking back at it though, maybe I should have gone for it.

Eh. I was not in love with this one. But still, that platform. Seriously?

This is mocking Ivanka’s speech about her daddy and really…why did the Republican convention feel we needed to hear from so many Trumps? We got Ivanka, Jr, Eric, Tiffany, Melania, Big orange cheesehead himself, one Trump wife, one Trump girlfriend, and…did I leave anyone out? And during Trump’s speech, he only mentioned one of his kids by name. I’ll let you guess which one that was. Anyway, I really like this grim reaper dude and I’m gonna reference this drawing in the future.

I like this one.

There is one more but I may draw it as an official cartoon, so you can’t see it yet.

What are your faves from this batch?

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.