Clay Jones

Schnooked By A Crook


cjones05222017

Trump supporters constantly defend their man from accusations he colluded with Russia and their efforts to elect him, hacking into the Clinton campaign and spreading false information. They tell us it’s all a conspiracy or “fake news.” That’s exactly what their golden-showered idol says.

What they don’t do is offer a coherent argument consisting of evidence or even reasons why it’s a conspiracy or “fake news.” Their best defense is to bring up Hillary Clinton’s email server or something Obama did. Hey, that’s the Trump defense too.

Now the dam finally broke and a Special Counsel has been appointed. Trump broke the dam himself as the Assistant Attorney General made the decision yesterday to make the appointment after news broke that fired FBI Director James Comey wrote a memo that Trump wanted him to drop the agency’s own investigation.

The assistant AG made the appointment because Jeff Sessions, the Attorney General, claims he’s recused himself from anything to do with investigating Trump, though he was in on firing Comey and is helping select the replacement.

Former FBI Director Robert Mueller has been named to lead the special investigation. After saying there was no need for a Special Counsel just a few days ago, Trump issued a statement welcoming the investigation as it will clear all this up. The statement was coherent which means someone other than Trump wrote it. Other than the statement, Trump has been strangely quiet on Twitter.

News also came out yesterday that former National Security Adviser Michael Flynn informed the Trump transition team that he was under investigation and yet they still hired him. I don’t think the theory that Trump is hung up on Flynn because he’s Putin’s guy is any less logical than the theory that Trump is loyal.

Republicans have fought against the idea of a Special Counsel yet there seems to be relief from them that it’s finally happened. “Finally” after just four months into the Trump presidency. These guys have been putting party over country for a long time now. Yesterday The Washington Post released a story that Kevin McCarthy, the number two guy in the House, said he believed Trump was being paid by Putin. On top of that juicy nugget, Paul Ryan told everyone present not to leak that information. This happened over a year ago and McCarthy and Ryan both denied it took place until they were informed it was on tape. Then they came clean and said it was a joke. It might have been a half joke.

Trump is close to Putin. He’s hired several people with connections to Putin. They range from Paul Manafort, to Michael Flynn, to Jeff Sessions, to his own son-in-law Jared Kushner.

Trump asked Putin from the campaign trail to help him win the election. He’s fired everyone who was investigating him. He fired Comey after he asked for his loyalty and for him to drop the investigation. He threatened Comey if he dared talk about his meetings with Trump. Trump gave classified intel to Russians in the Oval Office. Now Trump needs to hire a personal lawyer. Since there seems to be a lot of people in the Trump administration with links to Russia, now is a good time to be a white collar lawyer in Washington.

While Donald Trump may be saying he welcomes the Special Counsel, don’t be surprised if he doesn’t fire him. Trump can fire Rod Rosentein, the man who appointed the counsel. Maybe Trump won’t be implicated in the investigation. Maybe it won’t find anything on anyone. Maybe it’ll go after people but leave Trump alone. And maybe it’ll make a case against Trump for colluding with Russia or for his attempts to obstruct justice. If Trump is innocent then he doesn’t have anything to worry about. Does anyone believe Trump is actually innocent?

His supporters don’t believe he’s innocent or they’d make a better case than “Hillary’s emails.” If you’re a Trump supporter you’re either a schnook or a traitor to your country.

Which is it? Schnook or crook?

Update: Trump tweeted this morning. What did he do? He deflected by bringing up Obama and Clinton. See?

 

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

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Getting The Memo


cjones05212017

Yesterday I was looking forward to covering a subject other than Donald Trump. I had the topic picked. I came up with an idea I liked. All was going to be swell. Then 5:00 PM came around and like the day before, it brought a new scandal. A really big one. Mondays was really big but Tuesdays may have topped it.

U.S. Senator Susan Collins from Maine asked on Monday “Can we have a crisis-free day?” I’m feeling ya’ Senator, but no. No we can’t. Ed Rogers wrote for The Washington Post that with Trump leaving the country for eight days that will lessen the odds of a daily crisis. I don’t share their optimism. Trump is visiting Arab heads of state, going straight to Israel, and then heading to the Vatican. The potential for him pulling stupid out of the hat runs very high. That 300-lb. fat guy is going to walk the tight rope between Jews and Palestinians in Jerusalem. I have faith something’s going “splat!”

If you work in an office then at some point you’ve been asked if you’ve seen a memo. If not, just watch Office Space. Even if you had seen the memo but you blew something off, you may fall back on the excuse and lie and say you haven’t gotten that memo yet. Right now Republicans and anyone else who supports Donald Trump needs to get the memo.

This memo doesn’t contain any new news. It informs you that Donald Trump lies. Donald Trump is a narcissist. He’s an idiot. He’s corrupt. He’s unqualified for the presidency and he doesn’t know what he’s doing. Donald Trump will throw you under the bus and destroy your reputation, even if it’s just to save him a few hours on cable news. If you continue to support Trump, your credibility will be shot and you’ll only be as reliable as Kellyanne Conway. You better get used to people rolling their eyes at you.

Now Republicans have to make a choice. Do they continue to support Donald Trump out of fear from his supporters, or do they get a spine and put country over party? You know? Do their jobs.

On Tuesday afternoon The New York Times reported that James Comey wrote a memo after one of his meetings with Trump. In this memo the former FBI director claims that Trump asked him to kill the agency’s investigation into Michael Flynn. Presidents aren’t supposed to do that. Even Donald Trump.

This came a day after The Washington Post reported that Trump revealed classified information to the Russians. The Times and Post have been very competitive with their investigative journalism since Trump came into office. These two newspapers are doing the strongest journalism in the nation at this time and it’s paying off as both their circulations are increasing. I have a digital subscription to both and I’m proud to support real journalism. Your crazy uncle refers to it as “fake news.” The fact that I have subscriptions and they’re the go-to sources for information is why you see links to them so often here.

The Comey memo is bad news for Trump and it might be the strongest hit to his administration yet. He didn’t even send a flunky out to ruin their reputation by debunking it. They only sent a statement and by this point, a White House denial has about as much currency as Confederate money.

Trump was warned about Michael Flynn by acting-Attorney General Sally Yates. Trump fired Yates. Eighteen days after being warned, he fires Flynn. The day after he fires Flynn he has Comey in the Oval Office.

During the meeting Trump told everyone else in the office to leave the room, including Vice President Mike Pence and Attorney General Jeff Sessions. He asked Comey for his loyalty, as though he’s a tin-pot dictator and the United States isn’t a democracy. He then complained to Comey about leaks, which have been coming from the White House, and asked about jailing reporters who publish leaked information. So much for that Constitution thing. He then said to Comey “I hope you can see your way clear to letting this go, to letting Flynn go. He is a good guy. I hope you can let this go.” Trump wanted Comey to drop the FBI’s investigation and let it go.

Comey did not let it go. He ramped up the investigation by asking for more funds. The day after that he was fired by Trump. His spokespeople said the investigation did not weigh into the decision to fire Comey. Trump threw them under the bus a day later by telling Lester Holt that the investigation was on his mind when he fired Comey.

This is bad for Trump. Even Jason Chaffetz, the Republican who loves Benghazi hearings, wants to see the memo. Chaffetz chairs the House Oversight Committee. There will be subpoenas.

Even a few Republicans are talking impeachment. It may be too soon for that as there’s very fine parsing over defining obstruction of justice. But this trail leads to Trump firing people, stating he wanted the investigation to end, and then asking Comey to drop it, and then firing Comey.  This trail may wind all the way to a trial in the United States Senate.

Trump has to hope for two things. That Republicans will continue to live in fear of him and that people believe his word over Comey’s. Ha!

There’s been a lot of criticism of James Comey but none of that has been about his honesty. Trump’s honesty is not questioned. He would have to have some first. Trump is a pathological liar. In Trump’s first 100 days he told 492 false or misleading claims. In other words, lies. He employs people to lie. Trump is less honest than a professional baseball player on steroids.

Trump lies. He’s dishonest. He’s corrupt. He’s a buffoonish-man-baby. His mouth is taking him down and everyone who continues to support him and their reputations along with it.

Did you not get that memo?

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

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Badenov Meets Blabalot


cjones05202017

I imagine all the voices in Donald Trump’s head sound like Bullwinkle.

For once I’m in agreement with Trump. We can’t have someone in the Oval Office who can’t tell the difference between classified and unclassified information. That’s what Donald Trump said on the campaign trail. His supporters said that. Paul Ryan said it. They were all talking about Hillary Clinton. Coming to the surprise of no one, Donald Trump is the one who can’t be trusted.

The Washington Post has reported that when Trump was hosting Russians in the Oval Office that he revealed highly classified information. The story on the Post’s site is their most viewed since they reported Trump’s bus conversation about grabbing vaginas.

The sources tell the Post that the information Trump shared with the ambassador, the foreign minister, and probably the Russian journalists in the room, has jeopardized a critical source of information on the Islamic State. This is information we received from an ally and if they weren’t afraid of giving us secrets before, they are now.

The White House sent H.R. McMaster, the national security adviser, to tell the press that “it” didn’t happen. McMaster told the press “At no time were any intelligence sources or methods discussed, and no military operations were disclosed that were not already known publicly.” The problem with that statement is that McMaster disputed something the Post did not report. The Post didn’t report on sources or methods. They reported that Trump had disclosed information drawn from sensitive sources.

One thing McMaster did not comment on, and he didn’t take questions, was why White House officials took steps to contain the damage, placing calls to the CIA and the National Security Agency. Hey, guess what fucknuts just did.

Sources say our 70-year-old man-baby president was boasting and said “I get great intel. I have people brief me on great intel every day.” One source said Trump “revealed more information to the Russian ambassador than we have shared with our own allies.”

It’s really difficult to say you’re not in collusion with the Russians when you ask them from the campaign trail to leak information about your opponent. Or when you hire people who keep conducting secret meetings with Russians and they all lie about it. Or you hire foreign agents. Or when you invite the Russians into the Oval Office and allow their “journalists” into the room but bar the American press. Or how about the time Donald Trump fired the FBI director and basically admitted that it was because he was investigating his ties to Russia?

Trump supporters screamed “lock her up” regarding Hillary Clinton storing classified information in emails on a private server. Expect a deafening silence from them in regards to Trump just handing classified information over to Putin. However, several Republicans are starting to question the president and are recognizing there is chaos, or in this case, a dumpster fire.

Tennessee Senator Bob Corker said the White House is in a “downward spiral.” If that puts an image of a drain in your head, you’re not alone. Perhaps Corker will suggest to the president that he put a cork in it.

If only we had some way of knowing that Trump is immature, insecure, a braggart, emotionally and mentally unstable, or just maybe one sign before the election that he’s totally incompetent. The guy doesn’t even know how to tie a tie or sit in a chair like an adult. Why should we expect him to conduct himself like one?

Trump has already revealed classified information in the past to casual diners at Mar-a-Lago. The bad thing is, Trump can reveal whatever classified information he wants. The president has that authority. Even if he’s an idiot. Perhaps because he’s an idiot he should be removed from office. His release of classified information is dangerous to servicemen working in the intelligence agency, and dangerous to the United States in general. A careless individual should not be in possession of the nuclear football, or allow casual diners to take selfies with it.

I don’t look forward to a Mike Pence presidency, but it’s possible Mike Pence will take national security a bit more seriously than Trump, or at least not feel the need to impress house guests, or have a hissy-fit if he doesn’t get the most ice cream.

The Trump presidency has confirmed three things: Aliens did not land in Roswell, the moon landing was not faked, and time travel will never exist. Trump would have blabbed by now about the first two and Marty McFly would have proven the third by showing up on January 20th and stopping this shit.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Creepy’s Creeping Closer


cjones05192017

Each time North Korea has a failure with a missile launch there’s mockery and jeers from the West. We shouldn’t do that.

Is any test a failure if it teaches you how to make the next one a success, and the one after that a larger success? With each test, whether it explodes seconds after launching or lands in the Sea of Japan, North Korea is getting closer to putting a warhead in a missile. And with each missile test, they get closer to reaching Seoul, Tokyo, Honolulu, and Seattle.

Scientists and engineers in Kim Jong Un’s failed state don’t suffer when they fail. They continue to be rewarded and lavished with comfort and riches that escapes the rest of the population. Sure they suffer from massive radiation poisoning, physical deformities, and are sexually dysfunctional, but they eat well. They’re also given wives and go mentally insane (not because of the wives). On their journey to a youthful death from all the radiation, they are encouraged more to succeed than discouraged from failing. Kim can’t kill scientists and expect his rockets to fly. It’s hard enough to keep them from defecting. It’s also difficult to run across a border with gonads the size of watermelons.

Between 2012 to 2015 the DPRK conducted one test a year. In 2016 they conducted two. This year they have increased their pace and have conducted six. Are they becoming more provocative or are they making strides in their development? They do want to send a message to South Korea, Japan, and the United States, but the provocations are probably a bonus while making technological advancements. They’re still several years away from the capability of putting a warhead on an ICBM, which is what it would take to strike the U.S., but they will get there. Targets, including Americans, are much closer in Asia and they may have the capability to strike those now.

The DPRK’s test on Sunday was a finger in the eyes of Tokyo, South Korea’s new president, and Donald Trump. They also succeeded in annoying China and Russia. This launch was conducted while China is hosting a globalization economic forum which included 28 visiting heads of state. Russia usually doesn’t give much of a response to Kim’s shenanigans, but this missile landed about 60 miles off Russia’s coast.  That probably didn’t make Putin feel all warm and squishy on the inside.

The debate is how to handle North Korea. So far nothing has worked. What options are left? Limited missile strikes? Full-fledged invasion? A Donald Trump chocolate cake summit?

If we go the Trump summit route, he might want to make sure that Kim receives as much ice cream as he does for dessert. You never know what will set either of them off.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Leggo The Loser


cjones05182017

When do people let go of their fondness for a bad president?

Every president watches their approval ratings drop at some point. It happened to Reagan and Clinton who both had extremely high approval ratings when they left office. President Obama had very low ratings throughout his presidency until his last year in office when people started to realize the options we had to replace him with. Ugh.

Donald Trump has the lowest approval ratings of any president in modern history. Right now his overall disapproval is at 52% which you can check out at FiveThirtyEight. His ratings are in the dirt as most people don’t like the guy. But his base still loves him.

Why do they still love him? He’s corrupt. He’s engaging in nepotism. He won’t release his taxes. He’s too close to a hostile foreign government. He’s stocked his administration with nimrods. He doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing. He’s currently engaging in a cover-up. He’s breaking campaign promises left and right and doesn’t appear to have any principles. He’s immature and can’t stay off Twitter. He’s stupid. We’re discovering he can’t negotiate and he has the worst poker face EVER. Most of all, he’s a pathological liar.

And yet, Republicans believe his lies. Over 50% believe Obama wiretapped Trump. I’m used to some Republican stupids believing stupid shit like “Obama was born in Kenya” but c’mon, people! While normal sane folks see Trump for what he is, Republican voters are giving him an 84% approval rating. What is it he has done that you approve of? What? Eating chocolate cake? Making sure he has more ice cream than his dinner guests? What? Other than not being black or female I just don’t understand….Oooooooooh.

Republican office holders may realize Trump is a disaster but if his base continues to give him high grades then Congress will allow Trump to hand the White House keys to Putin, wipe his butt with the Constitution, and burn the country down….all while eating the most beautiful piece of chocolate cake. The GOP is afraid of that base.

Will it catch up to them? It’s hard to tell. You can’t find anyone today who defends Nixon’s cover-up. It’s universally accepted that Tricky Dick had to go. Even Democrats admit Clinton had an affair in office but they don’t think his lie about receiving oral sex amounts to the punishment of impeachment. Personally, I don’t think receiving oral sex from an intern is as bad as say…..selling out your nation to Russians.

How much worse does it have to get for Republicans to walk away from Trump? What sort of tragedy will have to hit the nation? It’s not looking good as most of Trump’s scandals are self-inflicted. What will he do next? He’s going on an overseas trip next week so that should add to the total. A week in the Middle East and Europe is way more than enough time for Trump to embarrass the nation several times over. I may not get any sleep that week. I expect him to go to Germany and say something nice about Hitler.

When will the Trump sycophants give up on the loser? Maybe for that to happen he has to lead a failing government through a losing war where major cities are burned to the ground, the landscape is devastated, and over 50,000 civilians and 620,000 soldiers die. And yet, in a hundred years someone will be screaming if a mayor tries to take his statue down.

As a memorial to Jefferson Davis was brought down Thursday in New Orleans, a crowd of sympathizers were chanting “President Davis.” Get that? “President” Davis.

He’s not my president. Which one am I talking about?

Creative Notes Part I: I’m curious how this cartoon will be received at the Southern newspapers who subscribe to my work. I have them in Florida, Texas, Georgia, North and South Carolina, Mississippi, Alabama, And Arkansas. But then again, how will it fare in the North? There are Northerners who adore the South and want to preserve all that Civil War heritage crap outside museums. In places like on their pickup trucks, flag poles, in your face, etc. I don’t get that.

Creative Notes Part II: Today is a small milestone for my creative process as it was one year ago today that I drew my first cartoon on a digital platform. As it turns out, that cartoon was criticizing nutzoid racists too. They need to take a day off.

I have not drawn a cartoon on paper in over a year and that’s a lot of cartoons. That’s over 400 drawings. I do miss paper. I miss the way it smells. I miss layers of ink. I miss white-out. I miss the sound of cross-hatching. I don’t miss scanning or erasing. Scanning was a chore for me as I had to fire up another computer and monkey with the program. Erasing smeared and left eraser crap on my carpet. Sometimes I’d erase so much that I would tear the paper.

A lot of cartoonists believe their way of doing things is the only way. I don’t. I believe what works best for you is what you should do. Whether you use pen, a brush, pencil, or work in digital, do what suits you. I don’t recommend going digital or tell you not to try it. Some cartoonists will thrive with it while others will hate drawing on glass. I’m still reminding myself that I don’t have to apply so much pressure.

After I year I just changed the battery in my stylus for the first time. I’m still on the original pen nib though I ordered several replaces about eight months ago. I just haven’t had the desire to mess with changing nibs. I know I’m going to drop one and crawl around on the floor for an hour looking for it. I’ve spent a lot of time hunting for bridge pins from acoustic guitars that I’d drop while changing strings.

I read somewhere that cartoonist Mike Shelton, formerly with the Orange County Register, was the first to go digital and he did it back in the 90s. I don’t see any evidence to dispute that because that’s early. Remember Windows 95? That came out in 95. That stuff was slow. He was drawing cartoons on computers while I was screaming at dial-up modems.

I think if I tried to go digital even five years ago I would have thrown the equipment off the roof of a tall building. Thankfully several others blazed the trail for me. Nick Anderson of the Houston Chronicle is the first who comes to mind because he’s probably had the most success with it and his work looks phenomenal. The advancements today are amazing because I can tell who is coloring with the program I use, but I can’t tell who is using real ink or not.

What’s the best thing about going digital? Fixing boo-boos. Editing and changing words in the speech balloons is much easier too.

Before I went digital everyone told me how much faster they work and that they’re more creative. I’m not. For some reason I’m taking longer to draw cartoons. I don’t know if that’s digital, or because I’m putting more into it, or if I just procrastinate more. I do enjoy procrastinating. I’m really good at it.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Tricking The Best Brain


cjones05172017

I need you to sit down and prepare yourself for some shocking information. Someone tricked Donald Trump. He was fooled. Got played for a sucker. Had his nipples twisted. Someone pulled the hairpiece, I mean rug, over his eyes. Putin said, “pull my finger.” And you know, if Putin tells Donald to do something Donald is going to do that something.

To be fair, Trump has done his share of making suckers out of other people. He’s convinced three women to marry him. He’s talked banks into loaning him money. He’s gotten contractors to trust that he would pay them AFTER they completed the job. Why as recently as last November he conned nearly 63 million unsuspecting Americans who are still waiting on Mexico to pay for that wall (and Obamacare will be replaced with something better, taxes will be released, he’ll fill his administration with the best people, defeat ISIS in 30 days, if Hillary is elected there will be constant investigations, etc.). But this time Trump is the fool, so shame on the Russians.

The White House told the American press that the Russians tricked them and that “Russians lie,” which is a total shocker. They’ve been riding a streak of honesty ever since 1962 when they told us there weren’t any nuclear missiles in Cuba.

I know you’re asking yourself “how can anyone fool Donald Trump?” He assured us that he’s smarter than everyone else and he has the best brain. Remember on the campaign trail he told us that the governments of Mexico, China, Russia, all of Europe, Narnia, etc., were out-smarting our politicians, and only Donald Trump could negotiate with them. Turns out that in addition to legislation, Trump can’t negotiate a photo-op.

We are talking about the sort of brain that thought inviting Russians to the Oval Office, the day after he fired FBI director Jim Comey, wouldn’t come off as bad optics.

You may also be asking yourself as I have, “why in the world would you invite Russians to the White House, specifically the one Russian, Sergey Kislyak, everyone in your administration has lied about meeting?” The answer is: Because Putin told him to. According to Trump, Putin asked him and Trump’s statement to Lester Holt was “what? I’m going to say ‘no’?”.

YES! You say “no. Now is not a good time. It’ll look bad. People are saying my mouth is your ‘cock holster.’ How could you even ask me right now? Do you not watch the news like…ever? I just fired the guy investigating me for being complicit with you, which of course I am, so maybe we should play it cool for a day or two. People will talk. My spokespeople won’t be able to coordinate the lies correctly. No! No! No! No! No! And nyet!”

But no. Trump lets Russians into the Oval Office. To be fair, you don’t say “no” to someone who’s holding a copy of you in a Russian-hooker tape. It’s why Trump won’t say anything bad about Putin….or Michael Flynn. Come to think of it, he’s never said anything bad about Russian hookers either. Hmmm?

Trump not only let Russians in, he let them bring their own press people (and all that recording equipment) and prevented the American press from witnessing the event. Trump felt confident that his handshakes, hugs, smiles, and sucking up wouldn’t be seen by anyone. Except, oops. The Russians released the footage showing him being practically excited to see them. Excited compared to his refusal to shake the hand of Germany’s Angela Merkel.

The White House was furious with one official telling CNN’s Jim Acosta “they tricked us,” and “they lie.” Well no duh there, Sparky. You got rolled by Putin. You’re lucky if Trump still has both kidneys. Better hope Christie’s are healthy.

You block the free press from covering the event and allow Putin’s paid propaganda unit in. What is that expression that suits this situation? Oh yeah. Karma is a bitch. Check for that kidney.

The White House later released their own photos, but none of Trump with Kislyak, just with Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov. That’s totally understandable because everyone in this administration forgets they met with Kislyak.

If you still support Trump, then I have a suggestion for you. Maybe you can contact the Russian embassy and purchase an 8×10 print of Trump and Kislyak posing together in the Oval Office. It may become your most cherished possession.

I know you’ll cherish it more than patriotism.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Tricky Woulda Thunk It


cjones05162017

D’oh! The White House was shocked, dismayed, surprised, bewildered, caught off guard, gobsmacked at the backlash they received for firing FBI Director James Comey. They thought everyone would like Trump firing the man leading an investigation into his campaign coordinating with the Russians. Hey, at least the Russians like the firing.

Of course these are the same people who thought it would be a good idea to send Education Secretary Betsy Devos, who recently said the founders of historically black colleges were real pioneers of school choice, to a historically black college. What’s next? Sending Steve Bannon to speak at a synagogue?

A colleague of mine made a statement that there are a lot of Nixon cartoons being drawn over the Comey firing issue. He’s right and there’s all sorts of comparisons being made in the press to Nixon’s firing of Special Prosecutor Archibald Cox in 1974 to what’s famously phrased as the “Saturday Night Massacre.”

My third cartoon of 2017 was comparing Trump to Nixon and I believe I’ve successfully refrained since then until today from drawing him again. Using Nixon is an easy go-to metaphor just like using Hitler, Nazis, and Klansmen for racist-like behavior. But it’s really hard not to compare the Trump administration to Nazis when he’s retweeting, associating, and filling his cabinet with Nazis. It’s also hard not to when the KKK throws a parade in Trump’s honor, but I digress.

Every president since Nixon has been compared to Nixon at some point during their administrations. Trump is drawing the comparisons to the point that the Nixon Library doesn’t want their guy compared to Trump. Who can blame them? Nixon was an evil, deceitful, corrupt piece of crap, but comparing him to Trump is a bit too much for the Nixon Milhous Fanclub. At the very least Nixon didn’t express more loyalty to a hostile nation than to the United States or grab anyone’s vagina.

Trump may wish to be compared more to Old Hickory Andrew Jackson than to Nixon, but right now Old Dickory is closer to being compared to Tito Jackson than Andrew.

Trump’s reasoning for firing Comey is not believable. There are reports that he was looking for a reason to can the FBI director and the Deputy Attorney General gave him one in that Comey was to mean to Hillary Clinton. Donald Trump caring about Clinton’s well-being is about as believable as him caring about Rosie O’Donnell’s feelings, or Steve Bannon going kosher.

There is another report that Comey asked for more resources, from the man who eventually recommended his firing, to investigate the Russia case. He also reportedly told associates that Trump was “crazy” for claiming Obama wiretapped him and that he was “outside the realm of normal.” Why didn’t Comey make a move on Melania while he was at it? Or even worse, question Trump’s ratings and crowd sizes?

The Washington Post is reporting Trump was becoming frustrated that Comey wasn’t loyal to him and wasn’t doing enough to look into leaks of his administration’s connections to Putin. At the very least Comey should have been as loyal to Trump as Trump is to Putin, right? Why couldn’t Comey just shut up and eat the meatloaf?

Another detail that was chapping the prez’s spray-tanned hide was Comey not backing up Trump’s claim that Obama had him wiretapped. What really made him nauseous was Comey stating that the thought of his decisions affecting the election’s outcome made him nauseous. Trust me. We’re all nauseous. And I’m not talking about the kind of nauseous after being made aware of Trump’s vagina neck.

According to a person close to the White House, on Monday Trump told V.P. Pence, Bannon, Reince Priebus, Donald McGhan, and others that he wanted to move on Comey. He summoned Attorney General Jeff Sessions, who is a loyal lapdog who promised to recuse himself from all matters related to the Russia investigation, and Deputy A.G. Rod Rosenstein to the White House with the directive to explain in writing the case against Comey.

The letter Trump wrote informing Comey of his firing was delivered by his longtime bodyguard, Keith Schiller (who reportedly, like Chris Christie, also sings “I Will Always Love You” to The Donald). Trump made sure to mention in the letter that Comey told him three times that he’s not under investigation into the Russia matter.

There are also reports that Trump has hired a new law firm, based in D.C., to defend him in questions about his business connections to Russia. I hear they’re really good with cases involving whiplash injuries.

The White House may deny these reports, which come from over 30 sources at the White House, Justice Department, FBI, and Capitol Hill. But they’re a hell of a lot more believable than the story of Trump caring about Hillary Clinton.

Conservatives have spent the past 48 hours pointing out the fact that Democrats didn’t like Comey and many wanted him fired. Every conservative political cartoonist has drawn the same cartoon with that argument. They fail to mention Trump’s hypocrisy of supporting Comey’s decisions to inform Congress and the public that he was reopening the investigation into Clinton and her email server. Funny how that works.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders, White House Deputy Press Secretary, made the same argument conveniently forgetting that in the past she too went on cable news to praise Comey’s release of the letter. Keep in mind that Sean Spicer is her boss and her father is Mike Huckabee which would set anyone up for saying all sorts of bullshit.

Kellyanne Conway reappeared on the networks to make the same case and to nail her point home, reminded us that Trump won Michigan. What? That has to do with Russia like…oh never mind. Go do something else, Kellyanne, like talking to a microwave.

So, the Nixon comparisons are here. I really wish I could avoid them but it’s kinda hard to when the day after he fires Comey Trump invites Henry Kissinger to the White House. Who suggested that optic? Let me guess. Was it Kellyanne? Was it also her suggestion that Trump invite Russian ambassador and top spy Sergey Kislyak and Russia’s foreign minister, Sergei Lavrov (who made jokes about Comey’s firing Wednesday morning) to the Oval Office and only allow Russian media into the room?

Trump probably didn’t want the American press in there as there aren’t any “corners” to hide in.

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