Blacks For Trump

Woke For Trump


cjones03072020

There are mysteries in the world and some things you just can’t explain, like how does Matthew McConaughey have an Oscar? Why? Why? Why? Doesn’t make sense, does it? But you have to understand that not everything fits stereotypes and expectations, like having an Oscar doesn’t really mean you’re a good actor or that a Grammy means you’re a good musician…or even a musician.

But people are not monoliths. Not every European teenager is enlightened and cares about the planet. While Sweden’s Greta Thunberg is out there fighting for climate awareness, there’s Naomi Seibt from Germany, who the Heartland Institute (a right-wing think tank) is using to debunk science while also saying white nationalism is an “inspiration.” I guess the Nazi from Ace of Base was busy.

Donald Trump only got 8 percent of the black vote in 2016. What I wonder is, “why so high?” A Public Religion Research Institute poll taken last December said 83 percent of black Americans don’t approve of Trump. Again, why so low?

And while Donald Trump can have a bunch of black supporters in the Oval Office declaring he’s not a racist, a Washington Post-Ipsos poll found that 83 percent (same number as the other poll) of African Americans believe Donald Trump is a racist. That’s the thing Republicans don’t get which proves they are racist. The black friend defense doesn’t work.

Republicans, pay attention and read it slowly: Labeling somebody does not mean you’re not a racist. Having a friend who is black is not a get out of racist jail free card. Even being married to someone of a different race and having children together doesn’t mean you’re not a racist. Strom Thurmond fucked black women. And I know what you’re thinking. Why did anybody fuck Strom Thurmond?

I can tell you Louis Farrakhan doesn’t hate white people, but my whiteness doesn’t make me an authority on it. For every black person you can find wearing a T-Shirt that reads, “Donald Trump is not a racist,” I can give you eight who will tell you, “Yes, he is.” That’s because Donald Trump is a racist. Oh, and for the record: Most people wearing “Blacks for Trump” T-Shirts look like they should be in Ace of Base and probably fucking Strom Thurmond.

Donald Trump’s campaign is opening 15 field offices in cities with large African-American populations, in an attempt to court black voters this November. He may as well be opening CD stores that only sell “Ice, Ice, Baby” or better yet, put Stephen Miller in the middle of Watts handing out copies of La La Land (I’d like to see that). In addition, Trump’s website is now selling T-Shirts with the word “Woke” on them. Trump may as well be selling shirts that read “C2H6 + O2 → 2CO2 + 3H2O” because he doesn’t understand what that means either.

Also, don’t create a monolith about blacks for Trump and say that they must be very stupid. That’s not fair. All Trump supporters are stupid.

While you, I, and surely the majority of black Americans, don’t understand Blacks for Trump, you have to remember that Charlie the Tuna wanted you to eat tuna.

Blacks for Trump is a huge mystery because Donald Trump is a racist who defends Nazis and makes a lot of racist comments like, “shithole countries,” “send them back, “there’s my African American,” “Execute the Central Park Five,” “Fire that sonofabitch,” people from Nigeria who come to this country will never “go back to their huts,” Haitians “all have AIDS,” or the entire birtherism campaign against President Barack Obama. You know Donald Trump doesn’t care about black people. But why should black Trump supporters be any different than white Trump supporters?

Because Donald Trump doesn’t care about them either.

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Kanye For Trump


cjones05022018

He refers to himself as Michael the Black Man. And whether he goes by the name Michael Symonette, Maurice Woodside, or Mikael Israel, when he is at a Trump rally, he is THE black man.

If you Google for images of “blacks for trump,” you’ll find pics of Michael the Black Man at Trump rallies squarely positioned behind Trump where the cameras can spot him. You’ll also find a lot of photos of white people holding “blacks for Trump” signs.

It’s Michael who some in the media were curious about. Saturday Night Live had a lot of fun mocking the guy. The Washington Post ran a story on him where they reported he runs a slew of conspiracy sites and he has called Barack Obama “The Beast,” Hillary Clinton a Ku Klux Klan member, and Oprah Winfrey the devil. In the 1990s, he was charged, then acquitted, with conspiracy to commit two murders.

Trump gave the guy a shout-out at one rally. This week, he gave a shout-out to Kanye West, who has turned out to be a Trump supporter, though he doesn’t vote. Trump loves to point out the diversity of his supporters, which got a hard eight percent of the black vote.

Trump has also pointed out Diamond and Silk, the strange sisters from North Carolina who run a YouTube channel defending Trump. The two women were on Capitol Hill this week, invited by Republicans to testify how Facebook is discriminating against conservatives and Trump voters. Never mind the fact that Congress is not in the business of regulating Facebook, they were there. Democratic Congressman Ted Lieu of California said it was a “stupid and ridiculous hearing.” Stupid and ridiculous has become the new normal.

You can look at Trump’s white supporters like Ted Nugent, or his black supporters like Michael the Black Man, Diamond and Silk, or Kanye West. The one demographic Donald Trump has cornered are people out of their freaking gourds.

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The Black Friend


cjones08282017

Michael “The Black Man” is a ridiculous human being. Not so much for supporting Trump, though that’s ridiculous no matter which race you belong to.

Did you find it offensive that I referred to him as “The Black Man?” Don’t be. He has added that as part of his name. And, that’s not the most ridiculous part about the guy. It kinda makes sense to use that name if you’re a black person attending a Trump rally, because in that scenario, you are THE black man.

Republicans have a problem when it comes to race. Maybe it’s because they engage in racist policies, like preventing minorities from voting. What they like to do is give the impression that they’re receiving support from minorities, so they always find that one guy to place behind whichever Republican is speaking.

The subject of Michael “The Black Man” was being discussed between me and a few of my colleagues. One of the more conservative ones didn’t realize that “The Black Man” is the gentleman’s tag of choice. My colleague saw me use it and sarcastically said to me, “Yes, Clay. There’s only one person of color who supports Trump.” I replied, “Let’s be fair. I’m sure there are dozens.” I speak fluent sarcasm.

“Dozens” of black supporters isn’t too far off. Minorities aren’t big fans of Donald Trump. Shocking. Mr. Black Man has been lampooned on The Daily Show and Saturday Night Live’s Weekend Update special. As it turns out, the man is a nut.

This person who was sitting behind Trump at the Arizona rally kept holding a sign that said “Blacks For Trump.” He was wearing a shirt that said, “TRUMP and Republicans are not racist.”

Michael has also used the names, Michael Symonette, Maurice Woodside and Mikael Israel. He once belonged to a violent black supremacist religious cult, and he runs a handful of amateur, unintelligible conspiracy websites. He has called Barack Obama “The Beast” and Hillary Clinton a Ku Klux Klan member. Oprah Winfrey, he says, is the devil. How can Oprah be the devil? She gives away cars.

He believes President Obama was endorsed by the KKK, who are actually the Cherokee. In the 1990s, he was charged, then acquitted, with conspiracy to commit two murders. He sounds like a fun guy to have at your next party. Just be warned, he may not leave.

You would think the Trump Campaign would have a better verification system for their tokens. But then again, the president doesn’t even check to make sure those tweets he keeps retweeting aren’t from White Supremacists and Nazis.

At least this time the person waving a “Blacks For Trump” sign wasn’t a white woman, as he’s had at past rallies.

I really hope that Michael “The Black Man” will eventually seek mental help. I hope the president joins him.

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