TrumpCare

Death Becomes Them


cjones06262017

Ya’ know, this might be the best caricature that’s ever been drawn of Ted Cruz. I’m not patting myself on the back here as I only drew a robe with a black hole for the face. Usually, when it comes to black holes and Ted Cruz, the black hole is where his heart should be.

I wonder about the type of people who like Ted Cruz. I imagine they’re the sort who giggle when old people fall down. They probably aim their car tires at tortoises crossing the street. A little pee came out while they were laughing hysterically at disabled protesters being arrested for protesting the new Republican designed anti-health plan. There’s nothing funnier than arresting people who need wheelchairs and oxygen tanks. Republicans find that shit funnier than Hee-Haw.

Ted Cruz is a vile, evil, sinister, creepy, and all-around icky person. While the GOP’s huge tax-cut plan for the rich designed as a health plan is too mean for Republican senators like Maine’s Susan Collins and Alaska’s Lisa Murkowski, it’s just not mean enough for Ted Cruz and the Republican toad from Kentucky, Rand Paul (the other senator from Kentucky, Mitch McConnell is an actual tortoise).

What’s in this bill from the U.S. Senate that actually became meaner than the House version (which many thought was impossible but the Senate said “hold my scythe”)? First, it strips funding from Planned Parenthood. And if you’re a Ted Cruz kinda guy who really desires to tell women what they can and can’t do with their bodies, you might be all right with that. Never mind the fact that there is no federal funding for abortions and all that money goes to cancer screenings and other health benefits (women stuff we guys wish to remain oblivious to). But who needs facts when you have dogma, right?

This bill will kill the Medicaid expansion that covers 14 million people in 30 states and Washington, D.C. States will have to make up the cost difference and it’ll cost them millions, and a few billion. Since states won’t actually be able to make up this difference, it will affect people in and slightly above poverty. But, Republicans have shown they really don’t give a shit about poor people.

The bill imposes a harsher federal spending cap on Medicaid. This will force states, who have to actually balance their budgets, unlike Congress, to choose between funding Medicaid, education, law enforcement, roads, prisons, etc. It will cut over $800 billion from Medicaid. Can you tell me how you can cut over $800 billion from the program without it adversely affecting the poor?

Since the fire in the states’ dumpsters won’t really start burning until most of the current governors are out of office, they’re not going to start planning ahead. Most of these people are Republicans. In case you haven’t noticed, Republicans don’t do well with budgets. Remember the budgets from Reagan, Bush, or the other Bush? Wait until the multiple bankruptcy president is through with the federal budget. We’re gonna have to rewrite the 22nd Amendment just so Obama can come back and fix this shit again.

The bill will maintain Obamacare’s tax credits but will scale back the value of those based on income and geography. It may benefit people with high premiums but it’ll also make deductibles rise. You don’t mind your deductibles rising, do you?

The Senate version will make it easier for states to seek exemptions from other provisions of the law, including the essential benefits insurers must cover, including maternity care and mental health. The House version would authorize states to apply for waivers allowing insurers to charge sick people more. Since this will have to return to the House if it passes, we can’t be sure what’ll end up in the final version. This thing could end up with a Dracula-blood-sucking-death-panel provision. Do you like leeches?

Both versions of this plan will force people to go without health coverage. How can that be predicted? When you make it too expensive and people have to choose between health insurance and little luxuries like eating, that’s the logical outcome.

By removing low-income and disabled people from Medicaid the Senate bill would fund a large capital gains tax cut for the rich. According to the Center on Budget [and] Policy Priorities, $33 billion of the tax cuts would benefit the 400 wealthiest U.S. households, so if you sell a lot of stocks you’re gonna smell goooooooooooooooooooooooooooood.

Thirteen members of the Senate worked on the bill in secret, though a few of them claimed they didn’t know what was gonna be in it. That’s like an author not knowing who-did-it in his murder mystery. It’s usually the butler and if this bill is amended to appease the bastards, Ted Cruz will probably be the butler.

Did I mention, nobody likes Ted Cruz? When I say “nobody,” I mean people who are decent individuals who don’t run over turtles on purpose and folks who don’t live in Texas.

One last thing: If you voted for Donald Trump, who promised he wouldn’t cut Medicaid, you’re an idiot.

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Tick Tick Boom


cjones05102017

You would think that if someone voted to strip healthcare from millions of people that they wouldn’t celebrate it openly? But then again, Hitler held rallies too.

Republicans, who complained that Democrats passed Obamacare without knowing what was in it, passed Trump/RyanCare today without knowing what’s in it. Many even admitted they didn’t read the bill. On top of that, the bipartisan Congressional Budget Office hasn’t completed their report on the effects of TrumpCare.

The GOP tried once before to pass a bill repealing and replacing Obamacare but it failed because it wasn’t evil enough. The one that barely passed today was chock-full of evil goodness, such as allowing insurance companies to charge more if you have a preexisting condition. Also, it’s a huge tax gift for millionaires and billionaires. Oh goody!

Creative Notes: Short blog as it’s 9:30 and I have not eaten today. I’m also planning to draw another cartoon tonight, so leave me alone.

“Tick Tick Boom” is a song by the Swedish garage band The Hives. It’s been out for a really long time but for some reason I’m just now discovering it and I’ve had it on repeat several times this week.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Your Health Care Enhancement


cjones03172017

Instead of falling for the distraction of a “leaked” copy of Trump’s tax returns from over a decade ago, I decided to focus on the impending disaster of TrumpCare.

The Congressional Budget Office, which is non-partisan, released their report on TrumpCare and was immediately criticized by the Trump team.

The CBO report says the new plan will leave 24 million without insurance. Republicans who love to cite CBO reports when they agree with them, attacked this report with a lot of “nuh-uhs.” Paul Ryan however was excited that the report says the plan will save $337 billion from the budget.

Ryan, who is supposedly a policy wonk, has the impression that insurance companies will compete to insure sick people.

Republicans were expecting a bleak report from the CBO and Trump has insisted that he doesn’t want this health plan to be named after him. He already has that disaster named Donald Jr to make excuses for. He shot a what this time?

Much like the broken promise of releasing his tax returns, Trump’s promise of “something better” replacing Obamacare is turning out to be another lie.

Currently a 64-year-old who makes $26,500 a year has to pay $1,700 of their premium under Obamacare. With the “something better” plan that same person’s premium cost rises to $14,600.

Every single state that voted for Trump will see their premium tax credits drop.  Individual enrollee’s tax credit in North Carolina, West Virginia, Oklahoma, Alabama, Nebraska, and Wyoming would decrease by more than $4,000 on average. Alaska gets it worse where it will decrease by $10, 243.

Trump suckers may still support No. 45 if he shot a man on Fifth Avenue, but we’ll see how they feel about him when his “something better” cuts into their bank accounts.

That’s what happens when you let the boobs take over.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, etc.. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

TrumpCare


cjones03092017

“TrumpCare” is an oxymoron. Trump, who was surprised healthcare could “be so complicated,” doesn’t care. That’s not entirely true as there are things Trump does care about.

Trump cares about crowd sizes. He cares about how many times he’s been on the cover of Time Magazine. He cares about what Rosie O’Donnell says about him. He cares about TV ratings. He cares about insults tweeted at him. He cares about being called “Putin’s Puppet.” He cares about Saturday Night Live, Alec Baldwin, and Broadway plays that insult his vice president, what’s-his-name.” He cares about whether girls are flat-chested or not. He cares that Jeff Sessions recused himself. He cares about people saying he has tiny hands implying he has an itty bitty teeny weeny tiny orange penis. He does not care about your health.

One of the dumbest things about so many people voting for Trump (out of the long list of dumb reasons) is that many voted to get rid of Obamacare based upon Trump’s promise to replace it with “something better.”

It’s like that game show where the contestant wins a prize but they can exchange it for something unknown behind another door. But what happens if you don’t like that car because it has a few problems and it was built by a black guy and you’ll settle for anything other than that car? You can end up riding home on a goat.

People voted for Trump to get rid of Obamacare while not having the slightest idea what Trump was offering. Don’t feel too bad because Trump didn’t know what he was offering either. He just assured us it was going to be “something better.” Congress didn’t have any idea. They spent so much time over the past seven years attempting to repeal Obamacare that they never did come up with a plan to replace it.

“Something better” has turned out to be dead on arrival. Not only are a lot of Trump voters upset with “TrumpCare” but so are a lot of Republicans in the House and Senate.

What’s wrong with TrumpCare, you ask? First off it says employers no longer have to offer health care. So if you’re unhappy with the cost of healthcare, don’t worry. Soon you may not have any insurance.

Another detail is that you’re not required to purchase healthcare which means young people won’t purchase it because they’re all invincible and that will drive up costs.

It gives tax credits based upon income and age which will really benefit rich people. Lower income folks? Not so much.

It eliminates the funding for Medicaid expansion. It allows insurers to impose a 30 per cent surcharge on premiums for any lapses in coverage. It aims to strip funding for Planned Parenthood. However, it does repeal a tax on indoor tanning beds (what a Trump highlight). That tax break will come in handy when you have to pay health costs for skin cancer.

The plan is so bad that the nation’s leading hospital and doctor groups are opposing it. The AARP is against it and that’s one voting block you don’t piss off. Old people vote. That makes the bill dead on arrival. I’ve seen old people come to near riots at grocery stores that were out of bananas.

Obamacare is actually titled the “Affordable Care Act.” Republicans started referring to it as “Obamacare” to scare voters. Those type of people didn’t want anything to do with something named after that Muslim, Kenyan-born, terrorist president. In fact, after the election many Trump voters said they didn’t care if Obamacare was eliminated because they had the ACA, the Affordable Care Act. Obama eventually started referring to the plan as “Obamacare” himself. He embraced it.

Trump doesn’t want this new bill, titled “the American Health Care Act,” to be referred to as “TrumpCare.” Donald Trump has been willing to put his name on anything. Hotels, golf courses, steaks, water, modeling agencies, cheap ties, a bicycle race (the Tour de Trump), a scam university, a board game, wine he doesn’t drink, and fragrances. You too can smell like Donald Trump. Get the fragrance and that tanning bed and you’re in business. Add an ugly tie and a bad reality show and you’ll really pick up the chicks.

Trump doesn’t want his name on this new health plan. That’s probably smart because most things with his name on it are doomed to fail, like his hair.

He’s not alone in not wanting his name on it. A lot of people don’t want their names linked up to the new health plan.

So when you retweet this cartoon or share on Facebook, be sure to use the hashtag #TrumpCare.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, etc.. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!