Space Force

Trumpanus


cjones06102019

And we thought it was bad that Trump doesn’t understand tariffs, but once again, the dumbest president in the history of presidents of any nation in any galaxy, made a tweet that left the rest of saying, “What the hell?

Donald Trump took to Twitter and scolded NASA for focusing on returning to the moon instead of Mars and stated that the moon is a part of Mars. Seriously.

My girlfriend told me about the tweet last night, shortly after it happened. I had to see it myself because it was so stupid, I thought we may be losing something in translation. I mean, Trump is stupid but there’s no way…yep. He said the moon is a part of Mars. I’m sorry I doubted you, Amanda. The lesson here is, never underestimate the stupidity of Donald Trump.

What was his point? He confused everyone with the tweet before he even got the “moon is Mars” stuff. He’s chiding NASA for focusing on going to the moon AFTER he increased their budget with the agenda of…wait for it…going to the moon.

On May 13, Trump tweeted, “We are going back to the moon.” Last March, NASA administrator Jim Bridenstine, who was appointed by Trump, announced plans to send US astronauts to the moon by 2024.” Last October, Mike Pence, a guy who’s been anal probing Trump with his face for the past two years said, “Our determination is to see Americans back on the moon in the very near future.”

So there’s a huge flip-flop on policy that’s giving NASA and Republicans whiplash. But, the moon is a part of Mars? Did Trump means the budget for going to the moon was the same as Mars…or a part of that budget…or does he believe the moon is actually a part of Mars?

In case you’re a Republican, the moon is much closer to Earth (that’s where we live) than Mars. Most scientists believe the moon was created from another planet slamming into Earth (a very long time, like before Jesus was playing with his pet dinosaurs). And, in case you’re a Trump supporter, the moon is NOT a part of Mars. The moon is 140 million miles from Mars.

Now, someone in the Trump administration who once had high ideals before he or she sold their soul, has to go before the press and argue that the president of the United States, the same one who believes we have invisible airplanes, does not believe the moon is a part of Mars.

Or, that person is going to have to convince the press, and easily Trump’s supporters who chant “space force,” that the moon is a part of Mars, and that the information has been concealed by the Deep State of Obama, Hillary Clinton, James Comey, and Robert Mueller for decades. While we’re at it, the moon landing was fake, the Earth is flat, chemtrails are a real thing, and Pluto is a dog and a planet, and somehow, Donald Trump is qualified to be president.

This is why aliens don’t come here.

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Space Force Score


cjones08162018

I don’t believe Donald Trump’s stupid idea of a new military branch called “Space Force” is a serious initiative.

First, it’s just going to do what the Air Force Space Command, which has 36,000 personnel and a budget this year of $8.5 billion, already does. Creating a new branch is creating a new fiefdom competing with the other branches for dollars. Republicans love to claim they’re against increasing the debt, but if you show them a picture of a rocket with “We’re America, bitch” painted on the side, they’ll throw $8 billion at it.

Is there an actual danger of our adversaries, like China and Russia, using space against us militarily? Yes, there is. But, posting horrible logo ideas on the Trump/Pence 2020 website isn’t going to counter those threats. It just fires up campaign donations. “Space Force” is also fun for deranged lunatics to chant at Trump rallies.  The Space Force idea seems more of a distraction and fundraising tool than a serious initiative.

Another reason I don’t think this is a great idea is that stupid people are supporting it. Donald Trump doesn’t understand that rivers flow into oceans. Their chairman of the Environment Committee threw a snowball on the floor of the Senate to prove climate change isn’t real. These are the guys to push scientific endeavors like a Space Force?

Before Secretary of Defense James Mattis flipped to support it, you couldn’t find anyone in the Pentagon who thought it was a great idea. People without any working knowledge of how anything detailed actually works, like Trump sycophants, think it’s a tremendous idea. These are the same people who don’t believe Russia was capable of meddling in and altering the 2016 presidential election but can build a Death Star. Being Dear Leader sycophants, they would believe and support any proposal from Trump, no matter how ridiculous, like making Mexico pay to build a wall on our southern border. The new normal is not being able to identify truly stupid ideas anymore, like baby jails, hiring your daughter and son-in-law as advisers, changing the paint job on Air Force One, listening to Sarah Huckabee Sanders, etc. This is the administration that gave a White House job to Omarosa.

Maybe the biggest reason that militarizing space is a bad idea is that we have a treaty against such measures. We’re not just a party to the international treaty, we helped write it. It’s based on the international treaty forbidding nations from militarizing Antarctica, which means we’ll probably start arming penguins.

Trump’s supporters worry if we don’t do it first, that the bad guys will militarize space. I worry that if we violate a treaty and are the first to fully militarize space, then we’ll be the bad guys.

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Space Balls II


cjones06252018

Donald Trump wants a “Space Force,” and for it to be a new branch of the military. In his proclamation about his space jam, he described how it would be its own branch, he used the term “separate but equal.”

That was a very bizarre and awkward phrase to inject into his speech as it’s from the days of the segregation era. Racist argued back then that it wasn’t segregation to demand nonwhites to use separate facilities, as long as those facilities were separate.

I don’t believe Trump had that in mind when he made his speech or that he plans to make black space soldiers use separate rocket ships from white space soldiers. What I believe is that Trump’s brain is still in the 1960s, or maybe even decades earlier.

He has also used the term “law and order,” which is from Nixon’s 1968 campaign. It was a wink and a nudge to white voters when Tricky Dick used it, and it’s a megaphone now when Trump uses it. Of course, he’s not really about law and order as he’s pardoned a racist sheriff, his cabinet has restocked the swamp, his son-in-law is engaging in pay-for-play and has become even richer since taking a job in the White House, and he himself robbed a charity for personal and business expenses. Trump can also use “I am not a crook.”

Another term used by racists in days of yore is “America first,” used to defend nationalism and xenophobia. Anti-Semite Charles Lindbergh used it while arguing to keep America out of World War II, and it was soon adopted by the Klan. Naturally, Trump likes it too. It’s not surprising Trump would use these sorts of phrases when he has Steve Bannon and Stephen Miller in his ears.

Trump is easily influenced. Kim Jong Un has described military exercises by the U.S. and South Korea as “provocative,” and after their summit, Trump started using the word to describe the exercises too.

Trump’s Space Force may be as likely as Ronald Reagan’s Star Wars. Republican presidents watch too many movies. After this weekend, will Trump propose defending our southern border with velociraptors?

Trump has ordered the Pentagon to create a sixth branch of the military, which will create a bureaucratic nightmare for a military that’s already stretched thin. But, all Trump can really do is direct the Pentagon to study the idea. Maybe go watch all the Star Wars movies and rank them from best to worst (Trump probably likes Jar Jar).

In addition to a huge headache creating a sixth branch will create, there’s concern it will fracture the Air Force. Defense Secretary James Mattis spoke against the idea last year, and most of the generals (who Trump says he knows more than) are against it. The good news is Trump does not have the authority to create a new branch. Congress has to approve it. What do you want to bet Trump doesn’t know that?

Maybe the space force idea is just a shiny object. Isn’t a military parade enough to satisfy Trump’s ego? Before we conquer space, we should do something about the space in Trump’s head.

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