Sean Hannity

Sorry Giuliani


cjones05242018

I think the most amazing thing about the current Rudy Giuliani disaster tour is that it’s still going. Doesn’t a tire fire eventually burn out?

After joining Trump’s legal defense team, Rudy went on Hannity’s show on Trump TV and threw their entire strategy out the window. For the rest of Trump’s legal team, it was like coming to work the next morning to discover a dead raccoon in the copier. It really stunk up the place and nobody wanted to touch it.

Rudy told Hannity that Trump knew about the payment to porn star Stormy Daniels that was made through fixer/lawyer Michael Cohen, that Trump had paid Cohen back, that Trump lied about knowing of the payment, that Trump helped commit a campaign finance violation, and that the president of the United States raw-dogged a porn star while his wife was home with a newborn baby. Even Hannity, the guy who washes Trump’s feet with his tongue, couldn’t bail out the Trump team during that performance. I’m surprised Rudy didn’t say, “of course there’s no pee-pee tape with Russian hookers. Don’t be ridiculous. We destroyed that months ago.”

Trump later said Rudy was new on the job and still learning the details of everything. So what do they do? They send him back out to talk to the media. Again. And again.

Now Rudy says the Special Counsel team told him they’re not going to indict the president, and they’re willing to conduct a short interview with Trump where they will not bring up anything to do with obstruction. What? The Special Counsel was created because Trump fired the director of the FBI, and they’re not going to want to talk about that?

Rudy also thinks James Comey is a liar, that stormtroopers raided Cohen’s office, and that Martha Stewart went to jail for testifying and not for the lies she told. So, maybe when he talked to the Special Counsel’s office his problem with comprehension was a factor.

What was very enjoyable was watching Giuliani’s meltdown on CNN when Chris Cuomo asked him why he believes the president can’t be forced to testify, but in 1998 he argued the opposite. Rudy denied ever saying that and when Cuomo showed him a clip of it, Rudy shouted throughout it, said “aw c’mon,” that it’s not relevant and the interview was being unfair. If only he was on Fox & Friends where they don’t unfairly hold you accountable for your own words.

It gets better. A lot better. Rudy says Trump is owed an apology for the Russia investigation. How would that work? Are we sorry you’re a traitor? Are we sorry you hired Russians to work on your campaign? Are we sorry your campaign manager was indicted? Are we sorry the Justice Department isn’t working as your personal protection agency? Are we sorry your fixer is as stupid as he looks?

Personally, I’m sorry I can’t draw Rudy Giuliani every day.

Watch me draw.

Please consider making a donation to keep the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. Reader contributions, small and large, really do help and are appreciated in a time of dwindling revenue for political cartoonists. You will also be supporting free speech and liberty while those in power are doing all they can to suppress it. You can also support by purchasing a signed print for $40.00. Just look at the right of this page and click the PayPal button, or you can email and make other arrangements. Thank you!

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White House Hangups


cjones05202018

According to an unnamed inside source at the White House, because they love to leak, Donald Trump doesn’t trust anyone who works for him. You have to admit, he has a point.

People who work for Donald Trump must become sycophants and discard all traces of dignity, credibility, and self-respect. This is an office where a four-star general’s clout is on par with someone who designs handbags. Why would you want counsel or advice with any of these people? So, Trump turns to people who aren’t yet stupid enough to work for him. Enter Sean Hannity.

According to those White House leakers in a story by Olivia Nuzzi for New York Magazine, Trump and Hannity are regular nighttime chatty Cathys. They do have a lot in common. They’re both very conservative, racist, slumlords, share a fixer/lawyer, and are lying shitweasels. Every night around 11:00 PM, Sean calls, and they chat about the “witch hunt,” media gossip, whose show sucks, who’s getting killed in the ratings, and how awesome they both are.

It’s said that Hannity fills the political void left by Steve Bannon and the soulmate void vacated by Melania, who sleeps in a separate bedroom. Trump has come to rely on the knuckleheads at Fox News more than he does on the West Wing staff, his cabinet, or our intelligence services. If Fox serves it, Trump eats it.

Trump workday goes from 11:00 AM to 7:00 PM, with plenty of “executive time” squeezed in between. He spends his free time tweeting, chatting on the phone, eating cheeseburgers, and watching Fox News. He used to spread his viewing around to other networks like CNN and MSNBC, but news that doesn’t fawn over him riles him up.

Reince Priebus and Sean Spicer (both gone) weaned him off real news and put him on a steady stream of bullshit from Fox. As one staffer said, “It got to the point that they were just like, ‘We need to get him off these channels and onto Fox & Friends or else we’re going to be chasing down this crazy-train bullshit from MSNBC and CNN all day.'” What they did was create a bigger tinfoil-wearing conspiracy junkie who should be sharing an attic with your crazy uncle.

A former White House official called the trouble caused by Hannity and Fox, “a fucked-up feedback loop that puts Trump in a weird headspace. What ends up happening is Judge Jeanine or Hannity fill him up with a bunch of crazy shit, and everyone on staff has to go and knock down all the fucking fires they started.” How do you knock down a fire? Maybe they should try dunking Trump’s head in water, like in a toilet.

Sean Hannity is not a journalist. He is proud of that. But the thing is, he should be a journalist. Even those on the opinion side of the news business are journalists. Hannity is on a news network. It’s dishonest for him to be involved in the issues and personalities he’s covering. He shouldn’t be sharing a lawyer/fixer with the president and hiding it from his viewers while he’s talking about it. Fox News should be a network that doesn’t allow it. MSNBC suspended Keith Olbermann for donating $2,400 each to three Democratic candidates. Fox News pays Hannity $36 million a year.

Donald Trump and Sean Hannity deserve each other. But we don’t deserve either of them. We can do better. Unfortunately, there are enough stupid people out there who chose them and put them in positions to complicate all our lives.

It’s time for all of us to hang up on both of them.

Here’s the video.

Please consider making a donation to keep the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. Reader contributions, small and large, really do help and are appreciated in a time of dwindling revenue for political cartoonists. You will also be supporting free speech and liberty while those in power are doing all they can to suppress it. You can also support by purchasing a signed print for $40.00. Just look at the right of this page and click the PayPal button, or you can email and make other arrangements. Thank you!

The Shammity of Hannity


cjones04202018

Yesterday, the Pulitzer Prizes announced the winners for 2017 awarding some of America’s best journalists. Ironically, on the same day, we got a reminder of one of America’s worst.

Fox News’ Sean Hannity has told his audience and critics time and time again that he is not a journalist. Sure, he’s on a news channel talking about the news and giving us his opinion on the subjects, but he argues that doesn’t make him a journalist. The reason he makes this argument is so he doesn’t have to conduct himself by the ethics and principles expected of journalists.

Hannity is one of the personalities who has helped turn Fox News into Trump TV. He not only defends and worships at the altar of all things Trump, he socializes with The Donald. He’s had dinner at the White House multiple times, and none of those were over meatloaf with Obama. When Trump says many people believe he should fire Robert Mueller, “many people” are Sean Hannity.

Hannity hasn’t just campaigned against Special Counsel Robert Mueller, calling the investigation a “witch hunt,” while defending everything Trump. He’s also passionately defended Trump’s lawyer, Michael Cohen, who is the president’s admitted “fixer.” Cohen paid porn star Stormy Daniels $130,000 to keep quiet about her having sex with the married Trump, which he claims never happened. Hannity’s defense of Cohen turned into a near-panic after the FBI raided the lawyer’s office, home, and hotel room seizing files and possibly audio recordings between him and his clients. On Monday, we found out why Hannity was taking it so personally.

Cohen is more of a fixer than a lawyer. He got his degree (in law, not fixing) from the Cooley Law School, which has been ranked as the worst law school in the nation. It’s shocking his office isn’t the trunk of his car where you can also get expert shoe repair. Cohen only has three clients, with one being the president and the second being Elliott Broidy, a Republican National Committee fundraiser who used Cohen’s fixing services to pay off a former Playboy Playmate $1.6 million he had impregnated. But, who is the third? Cohen’s attorney’s, who I hoped didn’t get their degrees from Cooley, were joined by the president’s attorneys (despite him not being “involved” in the case) against releasing the name of the third client. The judge didn’t buy their arguments and made them release the name, which made everyone in the courtroom either gasp or break out in laughter. That third client is Sean Hannity.

Hannity argues he’s not really a client despite Cohen’s attorney’s fighting so hard to keep his name sealed. The Fox News host claims he’s never officially had services done by Cohen and has only asked him a few questions in passing about real estate, though Cohen is not a real estate attorney (though he has bought a lot of property in Trump Towers, just like Russian money launderers do). Hannity points out that he’s never retained him, been billed, received an invoice, or paid legal fees. So what? Trump often refuses to pay his legal fees.

Someone can be your lawyer without you ever having paid them. If nothing else, if Hannity received a service from Cohen, even if it’s just bad legal advice, he has a responsibility to his viewers for full disclosure.

Sean Hannity is on a news network, a journalistic outlet, a forum where people get their information. He can refer to himself as an Oompa Loompa for all I care, but he still has a responsibility to his viewers for full disclosure. For all we know he didn’t even inform his bosses of his conflict of interest.

Sean Hannity can continue his refusal to square with his viewers and himself, but his network can’t. Fox News shouldn’t just suspend Hannity. They should fire him. Sure, he gets high ratings, but Fox needs to decide if they’re a news network or a propaganda outlet. I’m sure Shep Smith, Chris Wallace, and Bret Baier would choose to be identified with a news network.

Maybe Sean Hannity should ask one of them for journalism advice, and stop asking crappy, sketchy lawyers for legal advice.

Now, does anyone wanna be Michael Cohen’s fourth client?

Here’s the video.

Please consider making a donation to keep the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. Reader contributions, small and large, really do help and are appreciated in a time of dwindling revenue for political cartoonists. You will also be supporting free speech and liberty while those in power are doing all they can to suppress it. You can also support by purchasing a signed print for $40.00. Just look at the right of this page and click the PayPal button, or you can email and make other arrangements. Thank you!

Carving Up Fox News


cjones10252017

Conservatives and Republicans had a field day going after Harvey Weinstein after it was revealed he spent decades using his power in Hollywood to sexually harass young, wannabe starlets.

You would think the people who were silent over the sexual harassment allegations against their idols Roger Ailes, Bill O’Reilly, and Donald Trump would be smart enough to continue to keep their traps shut. They should have had as much to say about Weinstein as they did about former Republican Speaker of the House, Dennis Hastert. In case you need a reminder, they had nothing to say about Hastert and his pedophilia.

I saw a post by a conservative colleague of mine defending Trump, as if everything against him was only allegations. This same guy frequently refers to Bill Clinton as a rapist.

I’ve seen about two dozen cartoons on Weinstein from people who never touched the stories on conservatives, while liberal cartoonists haven’t held back on Weinstein. Donald Trump Jr. tweeted about Weinstein, momentarily forgetting he’s the son of a man who brags about assaulting women, barging in on teenage girls while they’re undressing, and openly cheated on Jr’s mother. Donald Trump himself went after Weinstein, because he’s a shameless hypocrite, and it was easier to discuss than American troops being killed in Niger.

People like Ted Cruz, who voted and supported Donald Trump for president went after Weinstein as if they actually have an issue or care at all about sexual harassment.

When it comes to hypocrisy, nobody beats the sorry excuses for journalists at Fox News, a bastion of hypocrisy.

There was much outrage all over the media, not just over Weinstein’s decades of sexually harassing women, but also over the fact that his company, and an entire industry, allowed him to get away with it. There were clauses in Weinstein’s contract, not that he’d be fired for harassment, but that there would be penalties to be paid.

Fox News didn’t just report on this, a few of their talking fucks had to express their own personal outrage.

I’m not one for giving parenting advice, but to future parents out there I would advise you never name your kid “Tucker.” That kid will grow up to become a bow tie-wearing asshole who says shit like, ““many powerful people knew what Harvey Weinstein was doing, and not only ignored his crimes, but actively took his side against his many victims.” Shit like that is why Tuckers are constantly getting beat up and receiving swirlies.

Let’s play with Tucker’s sentence. ““many powerful people knew what Bill O’Reilly and Roger Ailes were doing, and not only ignored their crimes, but actively took their side against their many victims.” Why didn’t you say that, Tucker?  Do you honestly believe sexual harassment is a partisan issue that is only committed by Democrats and supported by their benefactors? Or, are you just a d-bag, partisan, hypocritical, shameless, idiot?

As it was revealed over the weekend, after Bill O’Reilly settled a sexual harassment lawsuit for $32 million, his employer, FOX FUCKING NEWS, where Tucker Carlson works, rewarded him with a new contract….and the company knew about the settlement. And, they allow fuckers like Tucker to go on the air and bemoan the scandal of movie studios, Hollywood in general, and Democrats of ignoring and taking Weinstein’s side.

But, there’s more. Tucker is not the only hypocritical sorry son of a bitch working at Fox News. Sean Hannity went after Weinstein also and said, “Liberals love to be so sanctimonious, holier than thou, but they’re really hypocrites.” Yes, Hannity. Liberals are the hypocrites here. I’m shocked he could make that statement with a mouthful of Trump’s meatloaf.

Hypocrisy is what Fox News has done. They’ve renewed contracts of known sexual harassers and then allowed these two scumbags to go on the air and bitch about companies who looked the other way for that kind of crap.

Maybe, the jerks at Fox News don’t understand how hypocrisy works. Or maybe, they don’t believe it applies to them.

Or just maybe, they’re afraid if they speak the truth that the old-craggly-ass-stupid-fucker demographic will change the channel.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Romping With Hannity


cjones05292017

Now that Fox News’ Sean Hannity has abandoned his hunt for the “real” story in the murder of Seth Rich, he can apply his amazing journalistic instincts on another matter. Like defending Republicans who beat up journalists.

Hannity spent a week pursuing a story into the death of Rich, a staffer for the Democratic National Committee. It was a story that Fox News retracted and said it didn’t meet their journalistic standards.

The original story published May 16 reported as fact that Rich was actually the person who leaked tens of thousands of emails from the DNC to WikiLeaks and that his murder was tied to that action. Rich was shot and killed last July in Washington in what police describe as a “botched robbery.” There is no public evidence that even suggests he shared DNC emails with Wikileaks. The Rich family pleaded with Fox to stop spreading speculation without facts.

Fox eventually retracted the story, though without an apology. Hannity, however, on his radio show said that he retracts nothing and will continue to push the story. Hannity was relentless in pushing the bogus conspiracy theory and said that he “is not Fox News.” Later, on his TV show, he said that he would stop covering the issue “out of respect for the family’s wishes — for now.” It turns out he IS Fox News. That means his bosses, and probably a few lawyers clamped down on him. Also, advertisers are bailing on his show faster than if he was spotted at Bill O’Reilly’s strip-club-bachelor party.

Sean Hannity is not a real journalist. He was covering for Donald Trump and his Russia connections. It’s a sad state we’re in when the top-viewed news outlet hires hatchet men instead of reporters.

The press has never been popular. Every town’s newspaper has a derogatory nickname for it. But now it’s worse than ever. The president says the press is the “enemy of the American people” and he’s advocated changing the Constitution to change libel laws and imprison journalists. Your crazy uncle believes Breitbart has as much, or more, credibility than The Washington Post and The New York Times. CNN stands for the “Clinton News Network.” Republicans are body-slamming journalists and breaking their glasses.

The freedom the press enjoys is indicative to what sort of nation we live in. A free press means freedom to all. When that’s shut down or infringed upon, your freedom is next. The press’ freedom is your freedom. You need to understand that. It’s not just so Anderson Cooper can run wild and roll his eyes at Kellyanne Conway. It’s so you can live in a free nation where your right to know is not violated….or your right to report.

Apparently, you even have a lot of freedom to report lies. Ask Sean Hannity.

Creative notes: I started this cartoon last night and put it aside to draw my Hulk cartoon. I think I made the right choice but I still wanted to finish this. I called up my former FLS colleague Hilary and asked her where I should put the hyphens in “conspiracy.” Hilary is smarter than I am and she makes me write good (see what I did there? That’ll piss her off to no end).

Men’s rompers were in the news earlier this week. Do you know why? I don’t. If you find out, can you let me know what’s up with men’s rompers? I didn’t care enough to do any actual research into it. I just saw a bunch of posts on Facebook and then I Googled to see how many recent news stories came up. Quite a few. I didn’t read any of them but they were there.

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