Me Too

Ivanka’s Resistance


cjones01122018

Ivanka Trump has such grace, such beauty, such poise. Why she could be a model…for nepotism.

The only reason Ivanka is working as an unpaid adviser to the president is because her daddy is the president. And, as an unpaid adviser, she is worth every penny.

Her presence in the White House was reasoned by her being a rational and sobering influence upon her father, which is an admittance that he’s freaking insane. She has openly discussed how she would be an advocate for women’s issues, especially pay equity. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Ivanka’s promise of being an advocate for women has gone the way of Melania’s anti-online bullying campaign. It would be like Michelle Obama promoting eating vegetables while sitting in bed eating cheeseburgers every night.

Ivanka and Melania were both silent over accusations from 19 women of Trump’s sexual harassment, and his boasting of “grabbing pussy,” except when they have defended Trump for it. Ivanka was silent when Trump went after Mika Brzezinski’s looks and criticizing her for cosmetic surgery, which I’m sure, is totally foreign to the Trump family. She was silent when Trump tweeted that New York Senator Kirsten Gillibrand would do anything for money. She has been silent every time Trump has racially thumped Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren by calling her “Pocahontas.” She was silent when Trump went after Carmen Yulin Cruz, the female mayor of San Juan, or the Congresswoman Frederica Wilson and a war widow. She’s also made no remarks on reports that Trump requires women in the White House to “dress like women,” whatever that means.

She has not promoted equal pay or taken her father to task for taking healthcare away from women and threatening reproductive rights. He likes to grab ’em and legislate ’em.

Maybe, the very worst of this is her silence after Daddy Dumbass endorsed Roy Moore. Ivanka tweeted that there’s a special place in Hell for people who prey on children, but her strong position evaporated after the cheeseburger-loving Cheeto endorsed the pedophile.

After Oprah Winfrey drew praise for her speech at the Golden Globes, standing up for women and denouncing sexual harassment and assaults, Ivanka decided to jump on the bandwagon.

Straight from the department of Are You Freaking Kidding Me, Ivanka tweeted, “Just saw @Oprah‘s empowering & inspiring speech at last night’s #GoldenGlobes. Let’s all come together, women & men, & say #TIMESUP.”

Time’s up? You’re late to the party. You don’t have a freaking clue what time it is. “Let’s all come together?” Come together and do what? Sit silently when Daddy attacks another woman?

Ivanka standing up for empowering women has as much credibility as Sebastian Gorka in a pussy hat. She has more “togetherness” with the propaganda ministers, Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Stephen Baby Goebbels Miller. The only hashtag President Daddy’s little million dollar princess should be sending out is #complicit.

Ivanka needs to leave the White House and end the ruse she’s perpetuating that she’s actually serving a purpose. With that, we can say “time’s up.”

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print (please specify which print you want or I won’t mail one). All donations will receive my eternal gratitude

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Trump’s Twelve A Day


cjones12142017

The New York Times published an article about Trump’s “battle for self-preservation.” It includes some details on his diet of Big Macs, KFC, diet Cokes, and cable TV news.

Most doctors, but probably not Trump’s, will tell you that this is not a recommended diet for an old geezer. The article says Trump watches eight hours of TV a day. Even eight minutes of Fox And Friends is hazardous to one’s health. It’s his consumption of Diet Coke that will make a person go “whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?,” or at least make you pronounce United States as “United Thates.”

Full disclaimer: I probably watch more cable news than Trump, and like the prez, it can rile me up too. In my defense, I watch actual news and not that propaganda state-run propaganda shit Fox passes off as news. I consume too much caffeine too but I’m not in Trump’s league. Maybe three tall cups of coffee and two Cokes a day. I do try to drink two or three bottles of water a day, which I know isn’t enough.

But, twelve sodas? Twelve must be a frequent number for Trump because that’s the same number of women who publicly accused him of sexual assault. The number is much higher if we include those who won’t reveal their names.

Some of Trump’s accusers held a press conference yesterday trying to return the focus back to his transgressions. In this climate where members of the House and Senate have to resign for far less, we should look back on the horrible stuff Trump actually boasted about doing.

While Alabama’s reputation is taking a hit for the possibility of sending an accused pedophile, birther, racist, homophobe, Islamophobe, and law-breaking Roy Moore to the Senate, maybe we should cut them some slack. After all, 62 million Americans (fewer than Clinton voters) sent all of that to the Oval Office.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders and other Trump defenders will point out that voters, less than half, voted for Trump after his accusers came forward. That’s a good point but it doesn’t change the fact the man has assaulted women on multiple occasions. Just because you’re OK with someone being a creep doesn’t change the fact they’re a creep. Trump is on tape boasting about assaulting women and venturing into the dressing rooms for his pageant contestants.

Voters didn’t just overlook or ignore his history of sexual assault. They ignored his racism, his xenophobia, his narcissism, his sexism, his failed businesses, and his all-around ignorance of everything it takes to perform as president. And, since Trump wants to continue litigating the election then let’s continue to flashback to his sexual assaults.

If you don’t want to look that far back, then just look at this very morning. Trump actually sexually harassed a female member of the United States Senator on Twitter this morning.

Trump tweeted, “Lightweight Senator Kirsten Gillibrand, a total flunky for Chuck Schumer and someone who would come to my office “begging” for campaign contributions not so long ago (and would do anything for them), is now in the ring fighting against Trump. Very disloyal to Bill & Crooked-USED!”

Apparently, decency is expected of everyone except for the President and maybe the next Senator from Alabama.

Creative notes: You may not have noticed, but I’ve included a can of Diet Coke on Trump’s desk in a few recent cartoons. One reader even scolded me for picking on Diet Coke. Hey, it’s not my fault Trump drinks a LOT of Diet Coke.

Kinda like I was the first cartoonist in the nation to give Trump a very long tie (I’m sticking with that claim), I totally expect other cartoonists to start adding Diet Coke now. Hey, schmoes. I didn’t need The New York Times to point it out. I like heckling my colleagues.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print (please specify which print you want or I won’t mail one). All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Him Too


cjones11242017

One of the defenses Roy Moore’s supporters love to bring up is, why now? It’s a better defense than comparing him to Joseph and Mary, or he never did it without the parents’ permission, or that some 14-year-old girls can pass for 20, or that all the single women his age were already hooked up, or he dated young ladies “for their purity.” Seriously. A pastor used that last defense.

Moore’s defenders point out that he’s run for statewide election several times in the past and has been in the public eye for decades. So, why now?

I can’t believe Alabama is a black hole that doesn’t receive national news, but I can believe Roy Moore and his supporters are idiots. There’s a lot of people who can ask “why now?”. Roger Ailes probably asked that question before he died. I’m sure Bill O’Reilly, Al Franken, Kevin Spacey, Louis C.K., Charlie Rose, and John Conyers are asking the question. We need to pay less attention to the “why nows” and more to the “me toos.” Every man needs to ask himself if he has ever created a “me too.”

What is being described as “a critical mass of testimonials” is hitting men in politics, entertainment, business, and even in journalism. While we knew about Roger Ailes and Bill O’Reilly, which didn’t really shock anyone, new startling revelations are emerging about Charlie Rose, New York Times reporter Glenn Thrush, Mark Halperin, and Michael Oreskes.

As these revelations come out, lesser-known guys like myself have to be asking ourselves, “did I do that?” (and hopefully not in an Urkel voice). If every man in the United States who committed a sexual transgression in life was to lose his job, the unemployment rate would be somewhere around 60%, and you’d only have three political cartoonists to read.

O’Reilly’s story didn’t make me question my past. I have never called a girl on the phone and committed his offense. Since I’ve never disrobed and asked a female colleague to give me a nude massage or watch me shower, or answer the door in a bathrobe, neither Rose’s or Weinstein’s traps trigger any flashbacks. Louis C.K.’s deal definitely did not make me feel ashamed because who in the hell does that? What is wrong with these guys? How does it ever enter someone’s brain that THAT is a good idea or someone might even wanna see that? I don’t even want to describe it here, and this blog uses curse words.

Some guys, instead of confronting themselves, will cry about the times they’ve been sexually harassed. They need to cut that shit out right now. Yes, we get sexually harassed….like once in our lives. So, guys….shut up.

Some guys might think they’ve been Mr. Awesome their entire lives and have only exhibited ultra-cool behavior. They’re wrong, because even when we’re at our “coolest” we’re still bumbling idiots. We’re idiots who don’t know where the line is.

Thrush and Franken have both been accused of kissing women who didn’t want to be kissed. While I question what I might have said to a woman while I was in their company or even in a working atmosphere, I know I’ve crossed lines with physical contact. I’m sure every guy has. At times, attempting a kiss is a normal routine in dating. It’s called “making a move.” We’re all familiar with it, I hope. At other times, it’s taken as an assault. This is an area that has a line.

How many times have you kissed a girl without explicit permission? How often has it worked out and how many times has it not? In your best case scenario, she let you down gently and was cool about it and you treated her with respect and didn’t run off to tell your mutual friends and colleagues that she’s a slutty lesbian. As a guy who has been shot down in what must be a record number of attempts in various situations throughout his life, I hope I have always responded well. A couple of women come to mind who shot me down (usually just me asking them out) who were super cool with their rejections as though they were concerned for my pride and dignity (though, I still slapped myself in the head all the way home calling myself an idiot). Hopefully, I’ve never done the forced-tongue-down-the-throat technique Franken has been accused of. It’s dangerous being single, which I’ve been since 1999.

There’s been a few times in my life where a woman thought I was interested in her when I wasn’t. There’s been several more where I thought a woman was interested in me when she was not. And, there’s been a few times where I didn’t know someone was interested until years later after the ship had sailed. As I said before, we’re idiots. We spend our entire lives falling down stairs. But, how many times have you been wrong and disrespected a woman with your blunder?

We need to ask ourselves how often we’ve crossed the lines between making a simple pass and offending someone, or even worse, committing an assault.

It’s time to be introspective. Are all of our interactions in the past harmless, something that might be a cherished memory, or simply blown off as no big deal, or is it something that would ruin your career if you had a famous name?

Maybe, we can take the lessons from the past and apply it to our future.

And, let me make a note for every woman out there who has crossed my path in the past, I am NOT famous.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print (please specify which print you want or I won’t mail one). All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Me Too Part Two


cjones10212017

Americans are justly outraged over the revelations that Harvey Weinstein spent decades sexually harassing, and maybe, raping actresses. The anger has only intensified as more and more of his victims speak out. It’s even worse now that it’s been revealed his company had clauses in his contract regarding sexual harassment.

In Weinstein’s contract, there were stipulations that he had to pay penalties to his company for each time they paid off an accuser. Most contracts don’t work that way as it’s usually accepted that if you grope people then you’ll be fired, and not treated as if you only ran red lights.

As the #MeToo campaign took over social media, men started to realize just how common sexual harassment is. That was the campaign’s purpose, in addition to making men look into their own behavior. I have looked into my own behavior.

I can honestly tell you I have never sexually harassed anyone at work…as far as I know. I hope I haven’t done it in my personal life. I hope at my very worst, I’ve only been annoying. But, I am positive I have inadvertently made someone feel uncomfortable in the past. For that, I apologize to anyone who I may have ever offended. The last thing I want is for anyone to feel pressure or discomfort from being around me, other than normal reasons to find me unpleasant. I don’t want to be THAT guy, so I will try to keep it in mind for the rest of my life.

I was actually thinking about that over the past few years. It’s OK if everyone else needs the #MeToo campaign. Nobody is perfect, especially me. Sometimes a little push is necessary.

I’m not surprised how many women I know who typed “#MeToo.” I would be more surprised to meet a woman who claims she’s never been harassed. I’ve lived with girls. I have a mother. I have sisters. I have a lot of friends who are girls, and I was never blind to it in the workplace. In almost every instance, I watched the perpetrator get away with it.

And, it seems you’ll have a hard time finding a man who wasn’t sexually harassed. At least, that’s what I’m seeing on social media. Here’s the thing, dudes. The #MeToo campaign wasn’t created for you to hijack it.

I’ve been sexually harassed. I’m sure it’s happened a few times, but only one stands out. It was terrible and made me dread going to work. I actually requested a transfer and I got it. The moral of this is, only the one stands out to me.

Yes, it’s terrible to be sexually harassed whether you’re a man or a woman. But, men are not subjected to it nearly as often. Men don’t face the humiliation nearly as much. Men are rarely put into the position where they don’t have the power, or they’re physically weaker. Men are rarely harassed to the point where they have fear. Even as bad as my situation became, I never had fear. Hell, even when they make a movie about it, the harasser is Demi Moore. So, guys. Shut up. This time, it’s not about you. But, good job of using the #MeToo campaign to perfectly illustrate that you. don’t. get. it.

The other people who don’t get it are the conservatives using the Weinstein issue to promote their agendas. If the agenda is to end sexual harassment, good. Use it. Politicize it. But, that’s not the agenda.

Every political cartoonist has drawn on the Weinstein issue. That includes the conservative cartoonists, but each time they do it, it’s to attack Democrats. One of them has drawn on it three days in a row with the same message (for him, it’s the new Benghazi). I saw another one criticize NBC for not covering the issue…though NBC has been covering the issue. Of course, none of those people criticized Roger Ailes, Bill O’Reilly, or Donald Trump. For them, sexual harassment is a partisan issue. Conservatives don’t get irony or hypocrisy. They rarely get humor.

Donald Trump Jr. is another conservative who doesn’t get hypocrisy. He tweeted at Jimmy Kimmel to tell some Weinstein jokes. Kimmel sent Jr. the Access Hollywood tape where his daddy bragged about grabbing vaginas. Don Jr. once famously said that women who can’t handle a little sexual harassment should go teach kindergarten.

Ted Cruz sent out a tweet that the Clinton Foundation should get rid of all the money Weinstein donated to them. Maybe the charity should donate it to charity.

Then, there are the schmucks at Fox News. Tucker Carlson said, “many powerful people knew what Harvey Weinstein was doing, and not only ignored his crimes, but actively took his side against his many victims.” Is he describing Hollywood and Weinstein, or Fox News and Roger Ailes? Nobody at Fox knew what was going on? Oh wait. They had previous settlements as well. Again, conservatives don’t get hypocrisy.

Sean Hannity said, “Liberals love to be so sanctimonious, holier than thou, but they’re really hypocrites.” Yeah, hypocritical would be politicizing this while having dinner at the White House with Donald Trump, the chief pussy grabber.

Donald Trump said it wasn’t a surprise to learn about Weinstein. It’s not a surprise that Trump can flagrantly wield the sword of hypocrisy, but while Weinstein has been ostracized, after Ailes was fired Trump brought him on as an adviser.

Bill O’Reilly isn’t getting off the hook here. He tweeted at CNN’s Jake Tapper about his low ratings. Tapper replied with, “Low’ would be sexually harassing staffers and then getting fired for it — humiliated in front of the world. Now THAT would be low.”

Low is using the Weinstein issue and neglecting to focus on the victims. If you don’t have anything to say regarding the seriousness of the issue, or even to acknowledge that it’s a non-partisan, maybe you should just shut the hell up.

Next time you see or hear “me too,” maybe you should just listen.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.