Kyle Rittenhouse

Goodbye, Turkeys


cjones11272020

I’m breaking a couple of my rules with this cartoon. One is, I’ve drawn enough turkeys this year. The other is drawing a cartoon with a holiday theme that’s dated after the holiday. This is dated for Friday, which as you probably know, is AFTER Thanksgiving. But, I don’t make my clients embargo my cartoons by the dates, which means they can run them as soon as they get them.

But, I like drawing turkeys…and I like drawing Trump goons. And in my defense, how many more opportunities do I have to draw these people? Have you seen the type of people Joe Biden’s putting in his administration? Adults! How am I supposed to work with that?

In the Biden administration, I don’t see any inept son-in-laws wanting to create a back channel with Russia while taking loans from Arab kingdoms. I don’t see a daughter and her husband receiving security clearances when they don’t qualify. I don’t see a veep lavishing worship on the boss every minute while attracting flies. I don’t see an Attorney General turning the Justice Department into an agency that acts as the president’s personal attorney…which they did in going to court to block a civil suit against Trump by one of his sexual accusers. I don’t see a baby Goebbels in this administration writing policies that’ll kill immigrant children. I don’t see a goon going to prison whose sentence the president will commute. Say what you want about Hunter, but I don’t see a son in this administration as stupid as Donald Trump Jr. I don’t see a personal attorney spreading conspiracy theories outside a dildo store while his hair is leaking transmission fluid. I don’t see the president encouraging right-wing terrorists to shoot and murder protesters or telling them to “stand by.” I don’t see Nazis and Klansmen holding parades for this incoming president. I don’t even see hamburgers.

So, how much fun do I have left? It’s not like next Thanksgiving, when President Joe Biden is pardoning a turkey, I can compare it to him pardoning his goons, children, or even himself. Sheesh! What sort of presidency is this going to be for cartoonists? We have been spoiled by Donald Trump. With Joe Biden and Kamala Harris, I’m going to have to go back to writing my own material. Dammit all.

Sure. Joe Biden has gaffes but they’re not going to make up for a president (sic) who tries to redirect a hurricane with a Sharpie, or asks about nuking that hurricane, or advises people to rake forests, or talks about windmill cancer. Joe Biden has never gone to a debate and talked about the size of his penis. Seriously, people…you left me nothing to work with here.

Maybe our new Secretary of State will scream at a reporter and challenge her to find Ukraine on a map. No? He’s not an asshole? Aw, man!

Maybe Ashley Biden will sit in for the president at international summits, or get a bunch of Chinese patents, or be investigated for tax fraud. No? She’s not corrupt? Maybe Jill Biden will say “fuck Christmas.” I know. Not very likely when you replace a porn model with a teacher who has a doctorate.

Thanks a lot, America. Sure. You saved the nation from a stupid narcissistic racist reality TV show host and his grifting, and now we’ll stop putting babies in jail and ripping families apart. We’ll save the climate, perhaps stop palling around with dictatorships, and start using complete sentences again…but at what cost? Did you think about the cartoonists and comedians? Did you not think about the satire? No, you didn’t. I hope you’re proud of yourself, America.

It’s not fair. Even the democratic goons Biden could have hired, Donald Trump took. I don’t even have a Blagojevich with this administration. Shit.

So because of all that, you get another turkey cartoon. You can’t blame me. All I have left is an administration full of adults to try to make something out of with my cartoons.

And the fact Donald Trump and his goons will never go away or stop tweeting. Never ever ever. I guess there’s that.

Update: I went back and added Michael Flynn after he was pardoned today.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. And since someone asked this morning, yes. You can still get a signed print for $40.

Watch me draw.

MyTerrorist


cjones11252020

Remember when that underage terrorist twerp Kyle Rittenhouse went across state lines to shoot at people protesting for racial justice in Kenosha, Wisconsin and ended up killing two of them? He just made bail. You may be asking yourself, “How did an unemployed 16-year-old right-wing militia wannabe terrorist come up with $2 million for bail?”. You can thank the MyPillow guy and actor Ricky Schroder.

Rittenhouse’s lawyer tweeted, “KYLE RITTENHOUSE IS OUT OF JAIL! God bless ALL who donated to help #FightBack raise required $2M cash bail. Special thanks to Actor Ricky Schroder @rickyshroder1 & Mike Lindell @realMikeLindell for putting us over the top. Kyle is SAFE. Thanks to ALL who helped this boy.”

I know all this time you’ve been as concerned as I have about the safety of Kyle Motherfucking Rittenhouse. Oh, I hope jail treated him nicely. I hope the food wasn’t too horrible. I’m sure the pillow wasn’t as comfy as an $80 MyPillow…or from what I’ve gathered from online reviews…maybe it was.

Anyway, this underage terrorist who somehow illegally gained access to an assault rifle and killed people is out on bail and the child actor to thank, or blame, isn’t Chachi. Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa’at? Scott Baio’s stupid racist ass didn’t do it? Of course not. Chachi doesn’t have money. Have you seen him in anything lately? Fact: Scott Baio has had three sitcoms and I never watched one episode. I did watch Happy Days but that wasn’t HIS sitcom. And I know what you’re thinking. Scott Baio has had THREE sitcoms? I mean, he’s had as many TV shows as Matt LeBlanc who as far as I can tell, is NOT a Nazi.

In case you’re concerned that Ricky Schroder has gone over to the dark side…he only confirmed the information on…wait for it…Parler, the brand new online social media destination for racists and Qanon fucknuts claiming they’re leaving Facebook and Twitter because their conspiracy theories are being censored. Perhaps acting on Silver Spoons as a child left a permanent soft spot in Ricky for billionaire assholes. So what’s the MyPillow guy’s excuse? He’s a racist billionaire asshole. That’s not fair. Maybe he’s just a millionaire.

Mike Lindell overcame a crack problem and found Jesus. He also found Trump. What is it with born-again Christians being so supportive of anti-Jesus principles? Why are Christians so horny for racist policies that put brown babies in jail? Why are they so hot for policies that drug test welfare recipients, so if daddy did weed, his baby can’t eat? If you figure that one out, let me know.

I’m very supportive of Mike Lindell’s recovery from crack, but I think he’s still an addict. He’s addicted to orange Kool-Aid and like Chachi and Silver Spoons bastard who was in The Champ with MAGAt Jon Voight (I spent some time on Wikipedia this morning), he’s a cultist. And when Mike Lindell’s not pushing pillows full of bullshit, he’s pushing bullshit cures for the coronavirus. Lindell pushes treatment for Covid-19 that’s so stupid, only Ben Carson tries it.

People who go out and point guns at protesters are championed by Trump and his MAGAts. Case in point: Those scummy lawyers in St. Louis who were so threatened by Black Lives Matter protesters walking down their street, that that they interrupted margarita time to point guns at them…were championed at the Republican National Convention.

Make no mistake about it. Trump and MAGAts aren’t celebrating rich-asshole lawyers for wearing shirts with mustard stains. It’s the pointing guns at black people they like. Trump and Republicans encourage white domestic terrorism. Kyle Rittenhouse gained an automatic weapon illegally and crossed state lines to kill two people…and you haven’t heard one word from the president (sic) of the United States disavowing that. Donald Trump has actually argued that Rittenhouse was practicing self defense when he crossed state lines to kill people. I’m sure Ben Carson bought that bullshit.

Republicans argue that people should take up automatic weapons and defend their homes from black people walking in front of it, but Rittenhouse wasn’t even in his own state, less enough his “home.”

Kyle Rittenhouse, who was too young to possess an automatic weapon, took an automatic weapon across state lines, joined militia goobers in parading around Kenosha pretending to defend businesses, where not one person stopped to say, “Hey…is that kid old enough to be stomping around here with an automatic weapon?”. Instead, cops gave him bottles of water. Instead, after shooting people and walking toward police cars with his hands up, the cops drove past him. No worried that kid with a smoking automatic weapon…he’s white.

In contrast, cops shot Jacob Blake in the back four times (they shot seven times but missed with three of them), paralyzing him…after tasing him…twice. Oh yeah. Jacob Blake is black.

The shooting of Jacob Blake is what the protests were over in Kenosha. Estimates put the property damage at around…wait for it…$2 million. MyPillow and Silver Spoons could have helped the community out more by donating to rebuild it instead of giving that money to a domestic Trumper terrorist. But no. They would rather make a martyr out of a killer.

I think giving money to a terrorist fuck like Kyle Rittenhouse, who’s probably going to be found guilty of murder by a jury, is almost as much of a waste as spending $80 on a shitty pillow.

Either way, it’ll probably be hard to sleep at nights.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. And since someone asked this morning, yes. You can still get a signed print for $40.

Watch me draw.

Kenosha


cjones09012020

Sometimes I’ll draw a cartoon knowing full well most of my clients won’t run it. OK, it’s more than sometimes I do that. But sometimes, you have to say something others are afraid to.

Usually, when a cop does something that outrageous America and the police have to actually accept what that cop did was wrong, they like to refer to him as a bad apple. But it’s not individual cops that are the root of the problem of systemic racism among the nation’s police departments.

When a black CNN reporter was arrested for doing his job in Minneapolis, the arresting police department issued a statement saying they couldn’t verify his credentials. Never mind the fact he had his credentials on him, there was a camera crew with him, and he was live on the air when they arrested him. It was not a “bad apple” that issued that lying statement. It was the entire department.

When a Buffalo cop shoved an old man to the ground, cracking his head open, the cop was punished. Fifty seven other cops resigned from that volunteer task force in protest of the punishment. That was not one “bad apple.” It was 58.

When cops murdered George Floyd, it wasn’t one cop who refused to arrest them for an entire week. It was the department.

Today, it’s the Kenosha Police Department that’s still refusing to arrest the cop who shot Jacob Blake in the back seven times in front of his children.

It’s the Kenosha police union, not one cop, saying Blake had a knife, justifying being shot in the back seven times. A knife on the floorboard on the passenger side of his car…when he was shot seven times in the back on the outside of the driver’s side of his car.

It’s the Kenosha police union, not one cop, arguing Blake was a bad man and a wanted fugitive, as though that justifies being shot in the back seven times.

It’s the Kenosha police who decided Jacob Blake was such a danger to society, even though he was handicapped from the waist down from being shot seven times in the back by a cop, that he needed to be shackled to his hospital bed.

It was the Kenosha police who tossed water bottles to armed militia men patrolling their streets, pretending they were there to protect businesses. It was the Kenosha police who thanked these militia men even though their chief said they weren’t wanted.

It was Kenosha police who thanked and gave water to a white 17-year-old out-of-state vigilante.

It was Kenosha police who decided to drive past that white 17-year-old out-of-state vigilante after he had shot three people and killed two of them. It was Kenosha police who decided to let him go without question despite bystanders screaming at them that the white 17-year-old out-of-state vigilante had just murdered someone.

It was the chief of police who defended that murdering white 17-year-old out-of-state vigilante by saying he was “resolving” a problem.

It’s a white president refusing to say anything critical about that murdering white 17-year-old out-of-state vigilante while he continues to call peaceful protesters “terrorists.”

It’s white Trump supporters and Fox News glorifying and defending that murdering white 17-year-old out-of-state vigilante.

It’s white Trump supporters and Fox News glorifying and defending a terrorist.

The Kenosha Police Department has a LOT of explaining to do. America’s police departments have a LOT of explaining to do.

And in honor of Chadwick Boseman, Wakanda forever!

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

The House That Trump Built


cjones08302020

Republicans don’t comprehend well. You can scream as loud as the banshee Don Jr is dating and they still wouldn’t get it.

For the past three nights, Republicans have used their convention to tell us Donald Trump is not a racist while not once showing any support for Black Lives Matter. Last night, not one of them said Jacob Blake’s name. And of course, no one said Kyle Rittenhouse.

Kyle Rittenhouse is only 17, and like the Republicans he supports, he doesn’t get it. He was a big promoter online of Blue Lives Matter. What he doesn’t get here is, blue lives have always mattered. Today, one of my conservative colleagues drew a cartoon justifying the killing of Blake by arguing he shouldn’t have resisted arrest, and he used the term “all lives matter.” Just like blue lives, white lives have always mattered. The reason we say “black lives matter” is because the culture and system in this nation still does not believe they do. And resisting arrest should not be a death sentence. It’s like arguing a woman asked to be raped because she dressed seductively.

Case in point: Last night, while arguing for equality, Mike Pence defended our “culture” and Confederate statues. Another case in point: New video footage came out showing Kenosha police handing out bottles of water to the “vigilantes.”

The chief of Kenosha’s police says he refused to deputize armed citizens, which is smart. But then, his cops are on the street, handing out water to these militias and thanking them. The chief said his cops would hand out water to anyone, so let’s see the footage of them handing out water to BLM protesters and thanking them.

The chief also defended Rittenhouse saying the shootings wouldn’t have happened if everyone had obeyed the curfew and that Rittenhouse was just there to “resolve” the conflict. Seriously. I’m not a cop, but it seems to me that if the protesters are breaking curfew, then so are the fucking militias who are armed. The cops didn’t tell them to get off the streets.

And the other footage just released shows Kyle Rittenhouse approaching multiple police vehicles, even getting within inches of one, looking in the window, and the cops just waving him off. This was immediately after Rittenhouse had shot three protesters, killing two and taking the arm of another. The protesters were yelling at the police that Rittenhouse had just shot people. The police let him go. Why? Because he’s white.

We don’t need to ask how would the cops have responded if this was a black man with a gun. They shot Jacob Blake seven times in the back and are now supporting that action by saying he had a knife in his car…which he was not in. Also, the cops who shot Blake in the back seven times have STILL NOT BEEN CHARGED. Maybe this is why Rittenhouse dreamed of being a cop. You can shoot black people and get away with it. Hell, he almost did just by being white.

The GOP celebrated Mark and Patricia McCloskey for standing on their lawn pointing guns at Black Lives Matter protesters walking by their house. They had them as speakers at their convention. They warned if Joe Biden is elected, black people may walk by your house where your white family lives. Donald Trump and the Republican Party are making heroes and victims out of the McCloskeys. This probably leaves a huge impression on gun fetishists, especially one as impressionable as a 17-year-old.

Kyle Rittenhouse has a gun fetish. He has a cop fetish. He is a Donald Trump supporter. He even sat in the front row of a Trump rally. He’s also a killer and a terrorist. And the Republicans who support “law and order” and claim they’re the best at protecting us from terrorists…are defending this white terrorist. They’re calling this murderer a hero. This Trumpian version of Hitler Youth got exactly what he wanted. He got to shoot black people and he’s becoming famous, like he said he wanted, in the right-wing bubble.

They’re arguing he was just defending himself. Yeah, he drove across state lines to a town he didn’t live in to confront protesters and defend himself. Then, he ran away back across state lines after shooting people. He did not defend himself. He attacked people. He was on another video claiming it was his job to defend businesses in Kenosha, yet he was in the middle of the street shooting at people. It was not this 17-year-old kid’s job to drive to Kenosha and defend businesses. He should have stayed home and played on 4chan like most right-wing Trump supporting fucknuts.

And the other militia members who were in his presence, it doesn’t seem that any of them had an issue with a kid joining them with an assault rifle. The cops passed him several times and never had an issue with a kid on the streets with an assault rifle. Why? Because he’s white.

And how did he get that assault rifle? He’s 17. He’s not supposed to be able to purchase one. Has anyone on Fox News asked that question? Will the Republican Party ask that question? Let me kill the suspense right now. No.

The GOP is real big about calling for law and order and ending violence…but they won’t specifically call out these militia fucknuts. In fact, Donald Trump tweeted at them to liberate states with Democratic governors.

This morning, Donald Trump, the Republican Party, Fox News, and all conservatives can’t accept their complicity, can’t mention the crimes, can’t call this kid a terrorist, and can’t own any responsibility. Just as he said about the coronavirus, he’s not responsible.

The entire Republican Party is responsible for this kid who went out to shoot black Americans. It’s every right-wing gun fetishist’s dream. It’s why they carry long rifles into Starbucks. They’re hoping a black guy will make their day.

Kyle Rittenhouse went to Kenosha to have his day made. He went stormtrooping down the street, took lives and ruined others. The Republican Party encouraged this and now they’re defending it.

This an issue where we need to fight for civil rights and gun control. And maybe, the Republican Party and the president (sic) of the United States can stop glorifying white right-wing terrorists.

Donald Trump and the Republican Party support and promote white right-wing terrorists.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.