January 6

Ketchup and Treason

My readers were quick to send me suggestions yesterday during the January 6 Committee hearings where Cassidy Hutchinson was dropping one bombshell after another.

My readers wanted me to focus on Trump’s ketchup tantrum when he got mad over his attorney general Bill Barr’s public rejection of his election fraud claims. Or, they wanted me to draw something on him lunging at his Secret Service detail and trying to grab the steering wheel so he could go to the Capitol with his white nationalist terrorists and help them even further with his coup attempt. But, while those are fun, salacious, and important to note, and I really do hate ketchup, I don’t think they’re the main takeaway from yesterday’s hearing.

I think the biggest and most important revelation from yesterday’s hearing is that Donald Trump was told there were armed people in his insurrection mob of white nationalist terrorists, and he ordered his staff in profane terms to remove metal detectors he thought would slow down his angry pro-fascism supporters.

According to Hutchinson, upset that some in the crowd might not get to see him for his pre-insurrection speech, Trump said words to the effect of, “I don’t care that they have weapons. They’re not here to hurt me. Take the fucking mags away. Let my people in. They can march to the Capitol from here.” “Mags” refers to magnetometers.

Trump didn’t just tell his people to be in Washington to stop Congress from certifying the election, a duty mandated by the Constitution, he tried to clear the way for them to bring weapons. Many of these people were carrying knives, bear spray, metal poles, tasers, and guns.

Donald Trump was willing to let armed goons into his speech and proceed to attack the Capitol. He didn’t care if it endangered the lives of the Capitol Police, members of Congress, or even his own vice-president and his family. Donald Trump didn’t even care if his supporters were in danger, and one of the terrorists, Ashli Babbitt, was killed during the attack. Donald Trump didn’t care because they were not there to hurt him.

I could have drawn a cartoon of “treason,” “coup,” “insurrection,” or “sedition” on a wall in ketchup, or had Trump trying to choke someone with his tiny hands, and I would probably get more shares and reprints than for this cartoon, even though I’ve already seen a dozen cartoons of those concepts. But the ketchup and choking is not the stuff that’s going to put Trump in prison.

What should put Donald Trump in prison is trying to steal an election. He committed sedition and ordered his terrorist cult to attack. He obstructed Congress while it was doing an official duty. Donald Trump knew his people were armed and out to hurt his enemies and he goaded them. He called them out. He directed them. He told them to “walk to the Capitol.” Donald Trump is a traitor to this nation and Attorney General Merrick Garland needs to have the Department of Justice prosecute Donald Trump.

I don’t want to hear any of this shit about dividing the nation by prosecuting a former president (sic). The division and hate in this nation is the fault of Trump and his supporters. They tried to steal an election and they’re still lying about it. Fuck Donald Trump. Fuck Donald Trump’s supporters.

We found out a whole lot of other salacious juicy shit on top of the ketchup tantrum from Ms. Hutchinson.

Cassidy Hutchinson was chief of staff Mark Meadows’ special assistant. People usually had to go through her to get to the chief of staff.

We learned that in his anger at being driven back to the White House instead of the Capitol, Trump uttered words to the effect of, “I am the fucking president. Take me up to the Capitol now” and grabbed at the steering wheel of the presidential vehicle. Trump wanted to join his mob in entering the Capitol. Was he planning to enter the Senate chamber himself to stop the electoral certification for Joe Biden’s victory?

Maybe the Secret Service should have tried the trick that works when you take a dog to the veterinarian. Jingling the keys to the “Beast,” they could say, “C’mon, boy….wanna go for a ride? Who’s a good boy? Who wants a ride?” Sure, somewhere along the way, Trump may realize he’s not going in the direction of the park, or in his case, McDonald’s, but hell…you got him in the car.

We learned that on the morning of January 6, White House counsel Pat Cipollone cautioned Hutchinson that if Trump did go to the Capitol to intervene in the certification of the election, “We’re going to get charged with every crime imaginable if we make that movement happen.” She said Cipollone “was also worried that it would look like we were inciting a riot or encouraging a riot to happen up at the Capitol,”

We learned that Cipollone tried to persuade Meadows to get Trump to publicly call for an end to the rioting as parts of the mob chanted “Hang Mike Pence” and Meadows replied with “something to the effect of, ‘You heard him, Pat. He thinks Mike deserves it. He doesn’t think they’re doing anything wrong.’”

After the Trump terrorists broke into the Capitol, Cipollone said to Meadows, “Mark, something needs to be done, or people are going to die and the blood’s gonna be on your fucking hands.”

We already knew that Mark Meadows was a weak chief-of-staff but we learned that he did very little to persuade Trump to stop the attack. We learned he never pushed back against Trump’s refusal to call off the terrorists. He’s also probably the one who gave Trump his ketchup.

We learned from committee member Liz Cheney that prospective witnesses for the committee received intimidating messages with one text reading, “[A person] let me know you have your deposition tomorrow. He wants me to let you know that he’s thinking about you he wants you to know that you’re loyal and you’re going to do the right thing when you go in.” Gee, I wonder who that person was who was thinking about the witness.

An unidentified witness described receiving messages and said “What they said to me is, as long as I continue to be a team player, they know that I’m on the team, I’m doing the right thing, I’m protecting who I need to protect, you know, I’ll continue to stay in good graces in Trump World. And they have reminded me a couple of times that Trump does read transcripts and just to keep that in mind as I proceeded through my depositions and interviews with the committee.”

This is witness tampering. It’s a mob tactic. When they say “we know you’re loyal and will do the right thing,” the message is actually “If you talk, you’re sleeping with the fishes” or “we’re taking you for a ride, and not the fun kind of ride like when Trump’s taken to McDonald’s.”

We learned that members of Trump’s cabinet were discussing invoking the 25th Amendment to remove him from office after the attack.

We learned that Fox News’ Sean Hannity spoke with Trump on January 6 and told him his cabinet was considering removing him by invoking the 25th Amendment. We did not learn that from Sean Hannity despite the fact it would have been major news. We already knew Sean Hannity was more loyal to Trump than to giving his viewers the truth. Sean Hannity should be fired for this. He had a scoop in his hands and instead of reporting it, he called the subject and warned him. Fucking Sean Hannity.

We learned that Trump considered offering the terrorists a blanket pardon.

We learned that Mark Meadows and Rudy Giuliani (surprise) both wanted pardons.

We learned that Michael Flynn took the fifth multiple times, even when asked if there should be a peaceful transfer of power during presidential administrations.

I may come back and give you a ketchup cartoon, but I’m not going to merely write a statement on a wall in red. There’s more to gather from this than the fact Donald Trump is a big baby with temper tantrums. I already knew that.

The most important information we got yesterday wasn’t about ketchup, but that Donald Trump was willing for people to die in order to steal an election and make him a fascist dictator.

I already knew Donald Trump and ketchup were perfect for each other.

Music note: I listened to The Beatles.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Fox News Story Time

The first of the live televised January 6 Committee hearings will air tonight at 8 p.m. You can watch it on CNN, MSNBC, CBS, ABC, NBC, PBS, C-Span, and even Fox Business. Fox News is sticking to its regular line up of Fucknut One at 8 p.m, Fucknut Two at 9 p.m, and Fucknut Three at 10 p.m.

Fox News does plan to cover the hearings during TuckerHannityIngraham time as “news warrants.” What that means is producers will be watching the hearings and writing material of it for the anchors to be outraged over on the air. Fox News will have a special on the hearings at 10 p.m. which will gaslight the hearings to their viewers who didn’t watch them.

Fox News will not air the hearings for three reasons. Reason one is that they get the highest ratings with their usual primetime lineup. Sure, it’s all white nationalist propaganda delivered by a bunch of lying bastards, but they get viewers. Sure, most of those viewers are Nazis, but Neilsen Ratings count Nazis. Nazis buy Balance of Nature and MyPillows.

The second reason they won’t air the hearings is that they can’t let their viewers make up their own minds. Fox News can’t let its viewers watch the facts play out. Fox News has to gaslight the issues for their viewers. If you’re a Cletus, it’s easier to be told what to think than it is to develop your own thoughts.

The third reason Fox News won’t air the hearings live is that it would probably piss off their white nationalist audience that’s mostly made of sycophantic MAGAts. Fox News doesn’t want to air evidence against Proud Boys and Oathkeepers when their audience consists of Proud Boys and Oathkeepers. Their viewers don’t want to spend two hours hearing how Trump is a traitor to the United States. They’ll change the channel to Newsmax or One American News before hearing that stuff. They would just stick their fingers in their ears and go “la la la la la” for two straight hours, but they’d forget the words. Cletus will send Ella-Mae on top of the trailer to rearrange the antennae. She doesn’t need shoes for that.

So what will Fox News talk about tonight? Maybe they’ll do a segment on how nobody should listen to a celebrity like Matthew McConaughey talk about politics right before they advertise Tucker’s upcoming special on Kid Rock (this is a real thing).

Maybe they’ll talk about the assistant principal fired in Mississippi for reading to children the book “I want a new butt.” Maybe they’ll talk about the most dangerous thing making its way into schools today and threatening children, Drag Queen Story Time.

They’ll probably talk about the migrant caravan heading this way through Mexico. Remember during the 2018 midterms when it was all Fox News and Trump would talk about? They claimed George Soros was funding it. It was the most dangerous threat to this nation since Obama’s tan suit. It was so dangerous that Fox News stopped talking about it the day after the election.

The surest bet is that Fox News will do tonight what they do every night, and that is deliver propaganda over news.

Most news outlets are businesses that seek profits, but most of them understand they still have to be responsible to the public. Fox News does not get that. So while airing the hearings would be the responsible thing to do, Fox News would rather go with its usual lineup and continue selling advertising for the evening. But even worse, they’re not going to let their viewers see the proceedings but will later gaslight it all to them. And it’s mostly for entertainment.

Instead of showing two hours of evidence that Donald Trump tried to destroy our democracy, Fox News would rather show their viewers two hours of MyPillow and gold coins commercials.

Music note: I listened to Queen, not because of the issue here, but because they rock. However, when I first started drawing this, I got Cher songs in my head.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Jan. 6 Primetime

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday. 

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Perjury Dum-Dum

For Marjorie Taylor Greene to win her case to prove she’s qualified for Congress, she has to play dumb. Playing dumb and stupid should be extremely easy for the likes of Marjorie Taylor Greene because she got a head start. The only problem here is that it’s difficult to tell when a moron is playing dumb.

As dumb as MTG is, it’s still incredulous that she doesn’t recall texting Trump Chief of Staff during the January 6 insurrection suggesting they blame ANTIFA instead of the people actually attacking the Capitol building, Donald Trump’s white nationalist terrorists. It’s not believable that she can’t recall texting Meadows suggesting “Marshall” law to prevent Biden from taking office.

At 2:28 PM while the insurrection was in full swing and everyone was having a great time stomping on cops, Greene texted Meadows with, “Please tell the President to calm people. This isn’t the way to solve anything.” Well, golly gee wilikens, there’s nothing wrong with asking the president (sic) to calm his people down. It’s actually commendable. The only issue here is that she knew the terrorists were their people, Trump supporters.

But at 3:52 PM, MTG texted Meadows again: “Mark we don’t think these attackers are our people. We think they are antifa. Dressed like Trump supporters.” Jason Miller, a goon adviser to Trump also texted Meadows that day with the same idea he’ll probably not recall in a courtroom as well. Miller texted that “Bad apples, likely ANTIFA or other crazed leftists” had “infiltrated” the alleged “peaceful protest” by Trump supporters. That darn ANTIFA not letting innocent white nationalists in full body armor with gas grenades and nooses conduct their racist rallies in peace. Bad, ANTIFA! Bad!

Trump’s Fox News goons, Tucker Carlson, Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, and Brit Hume were all on board with blaming ANTIFA.

A group of voters in Greene’s congressional district are challenging her in court arguing she violated a provision of the U.S. Constitution called the “Insurrectionist Disqualification Clause” by supporting an incendiary rally that preceded last year’s attack on the U.S. Capitol. It’s a clause in the14th Amendment barring those who have “engaged in insurrection or rebellion” from seeking federal office. Greene has a lot of company, such as Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, Madison Cawthorn, Louie Gohmert, and…who else? Oh, yeah. Donald Trump. All these people should be disqualified from ever running for elected office ever again. And while we’re at it, we need to bar everyone at Fox News from ever running for federal office in case any of them get some bright ideas.

There should be a law disqualifying goons from public office. In fact, I believe every Trump goon, at the very least, should be wearing an ankle bracelet.

Greene’s attorney argued that Free Speech for People, the group bringing the challenge, wants to “deny the right to vote to the thousands of people in the 14th District of Georgia by having Greene removed from the ballot.” It’s a defense that Greene’s voters have the right to vote for the white nationalist terrorist of their choice. This is another example of white privilege. You start a riot then claim you’re a victim. Poor widdle me. I wasn’t doing nothing.

Greene didn’t just say, “I don’t recall” dozens of times in her defense of playing dumb to questions such about texting suggestions about martial law. She also said, “Yes, I was a victim of the riot that day.”

When asked whether unlawfully interfering with the counting of electoral votes in a presidential election would make someone “an enemy of the Constitution,” Greene said, “I don’t know.” She claimed from the stand that Trump did win the election but claimed it was “not accurate” that she wanted Congress not to certify Biden as the winner.

Days before the insurrection, she said, “We aren’t going to let this election be stolen by Joe Biden and the Democrats.” She was one of 147 Republicans who voted to object to counting the electoral votes. She’s on the stand in a court room claiming she never did something her voting record shows she did. This is called perjury because she’s lying under oath. It’s odd that Greene talks a lot of shit about being all about god, saying “god this,” and “god that,” then takes an oath to god, then lies her cultist balls off.

Green was asked about a video she posted in 2019 in which she called on supporters to “flood the Capitol building, flood all the government buildings” and feel free to use violence “if we have to” to get the federal government to address their “huge list of grievances.” She said she didn’t remember doing that.

Greene also doesn’t recall texting Mark Meadows on January 17, 2021, suggesting martial law. She texted, “In our private chat with only Members several are saying the only way to save our Republic is for Trump to call Marshall law. I just wanted you to tell him. They stole this election. We all know. They will destroy our country next.”

Declaring martial law would have destroyed this country, but maybe the goons believe we have to destroy the nation to save it…for white nationalists.

The lawyer leading the challenge to disqualify Greene said, “Anyone who ‘can’t remember’ whether they urged the White House Chief of Staff to talk to the President of the United States about declaring martial law can’t be trusted when they claim they ‘can’t remember’ their own engagement in insurrection,”

At this point, her best defense may be that she never urged martial law, but only “Marshall” law…and then she can explain whatever the hell that is.

Can we make not knowing the difference between “martial” and “Marshall” a disqualifying factor? I mean, if tweeting death threats to the Speaker of the House won’t do it, then what will?

If the challengers can’t prove Greene is disqualified from serving in office based on her participation in an insurrection against our government, perhaps her being in prison from committing perjury during this trial will.

Creative note: I’m still in Washington but I’m heading home soon. I knew all day yesterday that I wanted to draw on this subject, but I didn’t have an idea…and I didn’t get one at the Herblock Awards for Lalo or while staying out until 2:00 AM drinking with cartoonists. But I got up at 8 AM and came down to the coffee shop and this arrived in my head with my 16 ounces. I’m worried it may be an obvious idea but I think it’s pretty good for a hungover cartoonist in need of more sleep.

Music Note: I was back in the coffee shop to draw this cartoon, and I put in my Air Pods and listened to Coheed and Cambria and “Never say never” by Romeo Void.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

MAGA Gang Bang

There are a lot of places and events I want to stay away from. Papa John’s Pizza, another Trump rally, a Nickelback concert, Sturgis, Mar-a-Lago, any country music concert, Indiana, nightclubs, Cats the musical or movie, rodeos, renaissance fairs, Star Trek conventions, monster truck rallies, and now we can add Republican cocaine-fueled orgies to the list.

Internal White House records turned over to the House committee investigating the attack on January 6, 2021, show a gap of seven hours and 37 minutes. This was partly during the time of the attack on the Capitol building to overturn stop the certification of Joe Biden’s election victory over Donald Trump. Even though there’s a huge gap of no phone calls going in or out of the White House, we know Donald Trump was calling people and taking calls during this time. So, why aren’t they on the record?

The gap is from 11:17 AM to 6:54 PM. Trump gave his speech at noon down the street from the Capitol building. The outer barriers of the Capitol were breached at 1 PM. The Capitol Police were overrun at the entrance of the building at 1:30 PM. Around 2 PM, the Trump terrorists were breaking through the doors and windows. Despite telling the protesters he was going to the Capitol with them, Donald Trump was back at the White House gleefully watching the events unfold on TV. He was also on the phone throughout the attack.

We know during these hours that Trump called Senator Mike Lee, Senator Tommy Tuberville, and House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy. He may have also been on the phone with Congressman Jim Jordan, though he hasn’t been clear on this and has contradicted himself, quite angrily, several times. These phone records are another reason to call Jordan to testify before the committee. When did he talk to Donald Trump? What number did he call to reach Trump? What number did Trump use to call him? Questions, questions, questions.

The House panel is now investigating whether Trump communicated that day through back channels, phones of aides, or personal disposable phones, known as “burner phones.” Trump has been known to borrow phones to make calls.

This gap in time is not a mistake. It’s an intentional coverup, just like when Trump took documents to Mar-a-Lago, ate documents, or flushed them down toilets. The Trump presidency (sic) is the most corrupt presidential (sic) administration in history.

A Trump spokesgoon said Trump had nothing to do with the records. Trump himself issued a statement saying, “I have no idea what a burner phone is, to the best of my knowledge I have never even heard the term.” Basically, that means there’s a coverup.

Former Trump National Security Adviser John Bolton said Trump knows what a “burner” phone is as they used to talk about them in regards to not having conversations documented. It’s probably a great way to communicate with Nazis and terrorists so law enforcement doesn’t find out, and also a great way to call porn stars so your wife doesn’t find out. I hope he never got those two confused. “Be there at 8 PM. You bring the tiki torches, I’ll bring the lube.” Oh, yeah. Charlottesville Republican Nazi tiki-torch rally is another event I do not want to attend.

Burner phones are probably also great for when you’re scheduling a Republican cocaine-fueled orgy. Congressman Madison Cawthorn, one of the members of the Stupid Caucus, claims there are Cocaine orgies in Washington all the time. Really? And, he claims he’s been invited. Yeah, right.

You would think the first rule of Orgy Club is you don’t talk about Orgy Club. That’s probably the second rule now with the new first rule being don’t invite or tell Madison Cawthorn about Orgy Club.

Cawthorn was on a podcast this week and claimed he’s been invited to orgies and seen politicians do cocaine in front of him.

He said, “The sexual perversion that goes on in Washington, I mean being kind of a young guy in Washington, where the average is probably 60 or 70. You look at all these people, a lot of them that I’ve looked up to through my life, I’ve always paid attention to politics … Then all of a sudden you get invited to, ‘Well hey, we’re going to have kind of a sexual get-together at one of our homes, you should come.’ What did you just ask me to come to? And then you realize they’re asking you to come to an orgy. Or the fact that some of the people leading on the movement to try and remove addiction in our country, and then you watch them do a key bump of cocaine right in front of you.”

First off, orgies are icky…no matter who’s participating in them. But Republican orgies have to be one of the most disgusting things ever, like a nudist Trump rally with penetration. I need brain soap just to clean that image out of my head. I’m sure there’s a lot of perversion in DC, and when I find some, I’ll let you know. It’s also likely Madison Cawthorn has seen some shit, especially since he’s friends with Matt Gaetz, the guy who keeps rubbers in his office, shows nude photos to colleagues on the House floor, and has been credibly accused of sex trafficking minors. But I seriously doubt congressional codgers are inviting Madison Cawthron to orgies. And if there were congressional orgies, a handicapped guy would probably be invited just so nobody can accuse the event of not being inclusive. There should be a city ordinance that all Washington orgies are required to be wheelchair accessible.

How does a conversation start in Washington when you invite someone to a Republican orgy? Does Mitch McConnell approach Madison Cawthorn and say, “You’re invited to an orgy tonight…you’re gonna see my testicles.”

Just because someone has a track record of being a notorious liar doesn’t mean that the truth doesn’t occasionally slip out.

Some Republicans are upset with Cawthorn for saying this because they don’t want to give the impression they’re a bunch of sexual deviants while allowing Qanon to spread the conspiracy theory that Democrats are deep-state reptilian pedophiles. Also, maybe they don’t want Cawthorn telling people about their orgies.

Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy now intends to speak to Cawthorn about this, either to reprimand him for smearing the party or to find out where they’re having these orgies. One GOP representative is claiming his constituents are calling asking about orgies. And if there are Republican cocaine-fueled orgies, has Sniffy ever been invited?

If Trump was ever invited to an orgy and he talked about it, he’d probably boast it was the biggest orgy anyone’s ever seen. “It was yuge…the bigliest ever. There were only nines and tens, no pigs or dogs. I would have invited Ivanka if she wasn’t my daughter.” First rule of Trump Orgy is, Tic-Tacs.

The GOP is the perversion party. They perverted our elections, our Constitution, law and order, diplomacy, the democratic process, or elections, and even confirming Supreme Court Justices. Personally, I don’t care if Republicans are fucking each other because at least that gives them some time away from fucking the rest of us.

And I’m sorry I put the image of Mitch McConnell’s balls in your head. My bad. That’s on me.

Music note: Today’s drawing music was by the Rolling Stones and the Kinks.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Mar-a-Lago Confetti Shower

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When the House committee investigating the January 6 white nationalist terrorist attack on the Capitol won its legal case to gain access to documents from the Trump administration, it was discovered that a lot of those documents had been taped back together.

Presidential historian Lindsay Chervinsky told The Washington Post, “The only way that a president can really be held accountable long term is to preserve a record about who said what, who did what, what policies were encouraged or adopted, and that is such an important part of the long-term scope of accountability, beyond just elections and campaigns.” So naturally, with Trump being Trump, he doesn’t want to be held accountable for anything. What other reasons would someone have for destroying documents unless that person is concealing something?

When you are in government service and you start destroying documents, those documents immediately become evidence because you’re breaking the law. This nation doesn’t have dictators and a president can’t break any law he chooses…just a bunch of them, apparently.

Now, we have discovered something that I predicted way back in January 2021. Donald Trump stole shit from the White House. OK, it wasn’t a bold prediction.

The National Archives and Records Administration (NARA) retrieved 15 boxes of White House documents and other items that were being hidden at Mar-a-Lago. What are those other items? By law, these records should have been transferred to NARA from the White House at the end of the Trump administration in January 2021.

These documents include the “love letters” between Trump and Kim Jong Un as well as the letter President Barack Obama left for Trump in the Oval, encouraging him not to destroy the nation during his four years of trying to destroy the nation. But, despite these documents having Trump’s name on them, they don’t belong to Trump. They belong to the public and should be stored in the National Archives.

NARA had to have multiple discussions with Trump goons to receive these records which they should have had in the first place, and without having to talk to Trump goons. It’s like your negotiations to get your power drill back from your neighbor.

The goons are Mar-a-Lago also told NARA that they’re continuing to look for more documents. So, these 15 boxes aren’t the total collection of stolen archives. Again, what are the other missing items? How much of this stuff is evidence related to Trump’s attempt to overturn an election he lost? How much is related to the coup attempt by white nationalists? And how much of it’s just picture frames and light bulbs stolen from the White House?

The Mar-a-Lago goons deny “any nefarious intent” and said the 15 boxes contained “mementos, gifts, letters from world leaders and other correspondence.” You know, shit that doesn’t belong to Donald Trump. And I’m sure there was nothing “nefarious” about accidentally taking 15 boxes of shit that doesn’t belong to you. By the way, history tells us that any time Trump and his goons have told us something was innocent, it turned out to be the opposite. The only way Donald Trump should be out of prison and at Mar-a-Lago is with a court-ordered ankle bracelet.

The Trump White House had lawyers. They had legal people. They had staffers who were supposed to know the ins and outs of what is and isn’t legal. Someone should have detected this at least by the time box number eight was being placed on the truck headed for Trump’s compound of gangsters down in Florida.

As I said, I predicted Trump would steal stuff from the White House. I have a new prediction and that is: We’re going to find more. We’re not just going to find more stuff that was created during the Trump administration, but shit that was in the White House before he got there.

Donald Trump is a crook and a grifter. He grifted this nation for four years and he’s continuing to grift this nation. Donald Trump is still the man who had a sham university and a bogus charity. He’s the same guy who cheated contractors. He’s the same guy who cheated his own family from his father’s estate. All the money his political PACS raise is spent at “campaign” events on Trump property. This is the same guy who called Georgia’s Secretary of State and told him to find him more votes. So it shouldn’t be a surprise that Donald Trump stole from the White House. I’m sure Mar-a-Lago is stocked with White House toilet paper and tiny bottles of White House shampoo.

Can we just go ahead and put Donald Trump and all his goons in prison now? I hear prisons have shampoo.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Patriotic Cuddle Bear

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Ted Cruz is a coward. He can’t defend his wife. He can’t defend his state. He can’t defend his country.

A man attacks Ted Cruz’s wife. What does Ted Cruz do? He becomes a sycophant for that man.

His state is ravaged by a winter freeze leaving millions without power and killing hundreds. Ted flees Texas to Cancun where it’s nice and warm and there are beach resorts and daiquiris.

Ted Cruz’s country is attacked. Instead of defending his country, Ted supports the terrorists.

Sometimes Ted pretends he’s tough. Like when Donald Trump attacked his wife, he called Trump a sniveling coward. Trump also accused his father of murder. Later, Ted becomes a surrogate and defender of Trump. We’re not supposed to remember Trump attacked Ted’s family.

When Ted fled Texas for a beach resort in Cancun, he went back to Texas immediately and went into the GOP Photo-Op Recovery Program, making sure the public saw him in his Texas-flag face mask while helping put cases of water into car trunks. Later, he blamed his daughters for the Cancun trip with the logic that a good father takes his daughters to Cancun when they plead for him to do so.

Even though Ted Cruz helped the effort to block certification of the electoral college, won by President Joe Biden, he has called the attack on the Capitol one committed by terrorists.

And even when Ted occasionally gets something right, which is rarer than a woman looking at Ted and saying, “Mmmm, I wants me a piece of that,” he quickly backtracks. Donald Trump is a sniveling coward and Ted shouldn’t have backed away from that. But just like Trump, Ted is a sniveling coward and that goes with his smarmy condescending icky creepy personality. Ted will grovel and kiss any ass he believes will help him become president, even the asses of the vilest, like Donald Trump and Tucker Carlson. On Thursday night, Ted Cruz groveled to Tucker Carlson.

The entire nation calls Ted Cruz a liar but it’s politically damaging when Tucker Carlson calls you one, even though he himself is a liar.

Ted Cruz has called the terrorists “terrorists” multiple times. But after doing it again earlier in the week, Tucker Carlson got upset at Ted for calling terrorists “terrorists.”

Ted Cruz went on Tucker’s show and said his “terrorists” comments were “sloppy” and “frankly dumb.” That could be a good defense for Cruz because a lot of his comments are sloppy and dumb. But here, Ted was quibbling.

Tucker was upset over the white nationalists who tried to overturn the election to install Donald Trump as a fascist dictator and said to Ted, “You told that lie on purpose, and I’m wondering why you did.”

This is when Ted quibbled. Lying Ted said, “What I was referring to are the limited number of people who engaged in violent attacks against police officers. I think you and I both agree that if you assault a police officer, you should go to jail. I wasn’t saying the thousands of peaceful protesters supporting Donald Trump are somehow terrorists. I wasn’t saying the millions of patriots across the country supporting Trump are terrorists.”

That’s like saying only the pilots of the planes were terrorists on 9/11. The other guys were peaceful protesters. Osama bin Laden isn’t a terrorist because he wasn’t on the plane. He was only the mastermind. He only sent the terrorists.

The FBI defines terrorism as: “violent, criminal acts committed by individuals and/or groups to further ideological goals stemming from domestic influences, such as those of a political, religious, social, racial, or environmental nature.”

The people who attacked the Capitol, and not just the Capitol Police, were trying to destroy our democracy. They were trying to stop a process mandated by the United States Constitution. They were trying to overturn a legal election. They were trying to install Donald Trump as an unelected dictator. They were attempting a coup. Everything they did fits the definition of terrorism.

Ted Cruz was right and he shouldn’t have backed down, especially to the likes of a lying coward like Tucker Carlson.

Ted Cruz went on to say, “So, of course, it would be ridiculous for me to be saying that the people standing up and protesting to follow the law were somehow terrorists. I was talking about people who commit violence against cops.” Everyone who entered that building on January 6, 2021, to “protest” the legal election was committing an act of terrorism. Everyone who broke windows, stole property, and defecated and urinated on the floors and hallways were terrorists. Ashli Babbitt was a terrorist.

Ted continued to grovel and said, “It was a mistake to say that yesterday and the reason is what you just said, which is we have now had a year of Democrats and the media twisting words and trying to say that all of us are terrorists. Trying to say you are a terrorist, I am a terrorist.” But, Ted. You and Tucker do support terrorists. Everyone who uses the word “protests” or “tourists” to describe the events on January 6, 2021, supports terrorists. Donald Trump supports terrorists.

Tucker spent the entire segment insulting Ted Cruz and calling him a liar. Ted continued to grovel while the dangling little dots that vaguely resemble testicles receded into his body.

Tucker Carlson ended his segment by telling Ted Cruz, “I guess I just don’t believe you, and I mean that with respect.”

That was another lie because nobody respects Ted Cruz.

Music note: I was really into drawing this one while watching CNN’s Saturday morning shows, so I didn’t listen to any music. This is kinda weird because I don’t like any Saturday morning news shows. I should start watching cartoons on Saturday mornings. Is Captain Caveman still on?

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Kevin’s Slim Pickens

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A friend of mine used to hold a July 4th pool party every year…until one attendee got drunk and pooped in the pool. I’m sure it’s just a coincidence the pool pooper is a Republican. But nevertheless, no more July 4th pool parties. And pooping in the pool is exactly what House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy plans to do in the January 6 Committee.

The first attempt to have a commission to investigate the white nationalist MAGA terrorist insurrection on the Capitol Complex passed the House with very little GOP support, and died in the Senate. Republicans claimed they voted against it because the commission, with equal representation by both parties and each having full subpoena powers, would be too partisan. Before the vote, Democrats gave Republicans EVERYTHING they demanded before they could vote for it…and they still voted against it.

It’s kinda like taking your kids shopping for back-to-school clothes, and they refuse to participate. So after you’re done shopping for them, they get a hair up their ass because they don’t like the clothes you picked, which looks like that cheap-looking checkered suit Matt Gaetz wears. In this example, your kids are right to complain, you monster.

In Congress, Republicans, after being given everything they asked for, still voted against it. Even though they voted against it, we still need to get answers for the January 6 MAGA tiny-dick terrorist attack. So, Nancy Pelosi held a vote for another committee and this time, Republicans don’t have equal representation or subpoena power. Boo-hoo, fucknuts.

Of course, now they’re going to complain and campaign that they weren’t given equal representation and subpoena power. They will gaslight that they were never given a choice.

Kevin gets five picks and Nancy gets eight. Even better, Nancy can veto Kevin’s picks. And from looking at the names being tossed around by the tossers, she may need to veto every one of them.

Originally, Kevin threatened his members and said if they accepted an appointment to the committee, he would take away all their other committee assignments. Republicans are already afraid of this committee. They want all talk of the racists-for-Trump terrorist attack to go away. Talking about it can hurt the entire party in the 2022 midterms, upset the MAGAt base, and upset Donald Trump. If any Republican takes it seriously and ask serious questions like, “How many Nazis-for-Trump were in the riot?”, then Donald Trump may primary them.

Kevin is also afraid of who this committee may have questions for. Kevin is afraid they may subpoena Kevin. Also, the committee may subpoena Mo Brooks, Rudy Giuliani, Donald Trump Jr, and even Donald Trump. Keep in mind, it’s a crime to lie to Congress. Mo Brooks is currently using defending himself in a lawsuit for inciting the riot with the argument he was lying about the election being stolen in his capacity as a federal official.

The problem for Kevin is: Do Republicans refuse to work with the committee and risk coming off as disinterested in protecting our nation from terrorists, or do they do the jobs they were elected to do and risk pissing off the racist MAGAt base and Trump in the process?

The answer for Kevin is to go ahead and allow Republicans to join and to make sure they’re poo-flinging howler monkeys, and in the House, there is no better poo-flinging howler monkey than Jim Jordan.

First off, Kevin can’t pick people like Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, or Marjorie Taylor Green. They can’t even pretend to be serious in addition to being too stupid for the committee. Appointing one of those shitweasels will only serve to embarrass the GOP…which should already be embarrassed.

Kevin plans to pick shit stains like Jim Jordan who will use the committee to deflect from the white nationalist terrorist attack. Nancy should veto the selection of Jim Jordan. She should veto anyone who voted against certifying the election. Every member who voted against certifying the election voted against democracy. They voted with the terrorists. In fact, it’s illegal to be in Congress after you supported enemies against the United States of America. Every single one of those Republicans who voted with the terrorists should be removed from Congress.

When people are elected to Congress, they take an oath to protect our nation, not to protect terrorists. The Republican Party and Kevin McCarthy have chosen to protect terrorists over their nation.

Republicans accuse this committee and Democrats of being partisan about January 6. It is now partisan. One side is partisan to democracy. The other side is partisan to terrorists.

Nancy, please don’t allow any supporters of terrorists to sit on this committee. Let them fling poo on their own time. If they want to shit in a pool, there’s one at Mar-a-Lago.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which usually go for $45.00 each, signed. Another order will be placed soon. You may pre-order if you want. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Republican Medals

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Yesterday, Vladimir Putin compared Alexei Nevalny to the white nationalist terrorists who attacked the Capitol in a bloody coup attempt to make Donald Trump this nation’s first dictator.

Alexei Nevalny is considered the man Putin fears the most. He’s an opposition leader whom the Russian government has convicted twice on embezzlement charges in order to prevent him from running for president. Since that wasn’t enough to silence his voice, they tried to murder him. They poisoned him which made him flee to Germany for medical treatment, violating his parole. Nevalny returned to Putin’s Russia knowing they would probably throw him in prison, after trying to murder him, for violating his parole.

The MAGA terrorists attacked the capitol to stop Congress from performing its constitutional duty. They did this act based on a lie. Nearly 500 have been charged with crimes. While Nevalny returned to Russia knowing he could be thrown in prison where they would try again to kill him, the MAGA terrorists have cried for their mommies.

Nevalny was poisoned through his food. While in prison, he has been starved. The Qanon Shaman’s mommy cried to a judge that jail food is too tough for her Q baby and it gives him the rumbly tummy.

Republicans will probably love Putin’s comparison. Although Putin was trying to frame Alexei Nevalny as someone as horrible as the MAGA terrorists, Republicans will frame this as their terrorists being persecuted crusaders for their nation, like Nevalny. Amnesty International has listed Alexei Nevalny as a “prisoner of conscience.” The MAGA terrorists don’t have consciences.

Alexei Nevalny is brave and returned to fascist Russia to face consequences from an unfair justice system controlled by a autocrat. The MAGA terrorists only attacked the Capitol because they had large numbers and when brought to accountability, cried like babies. Many are using the legal defense of being too stupid to think for themselves, blaming Trump for goading them and Fox News for giving them “Foxitus.”

Vladimir Putin refuses to say Nevalny’s name. Republicans refuse to use the word “insurrection” in regard to the insurrection. But, some are real good at using “executed” for the death of Ashli Babbitt, a MAGA terrorist killed by Capitol Police while trying to climb through a broken window inside the Capitol. Republicans are framing Babbitt as a hero when the fact is, she was a terrorist.

Ashli Babbitt attacked her government trying to stop the certification of an election and to install a dictatorship. She tried to stop the democratic process. She tried to overturn a democratic election. She is the very definition of a terrorist. The heroes on January 6 are the Capitol Police who fought against her insurrection.

Yesterday, the House overwhelmingly passed a resolution to award the Congressional Gold Medal to the officers who defended the Capitol from Donald Trump’s terrorists. The vote was 406-21.

Yes, 21 House members voted against giving the Gold Medal to cops. You would think something like this would have been unanimous. It would seem that voting to give medals to cops who fought terrorists would be an easy work day, a no-brainer, and be like a day with cake. But no. All 21 no votes came from Republicans…you know, the people who always cry that “blue lives matter” and rail against “defunding the police.” You know, the same people who always pontificate about how much they are for the rule of law. Why, they’re the law-and-order party. They seek justice. They back our boys and girls in blue.

Republicans are not the party of law and order. They’re the party of white nationalist terrorists and bullshit. Just like their claims of patriotism have been exposed as lies by their love for all that is Trump and Putin, their claims of supporting police are total hogwash too.

Why did 21 Republicans, all Trump supporters with a few being Qnuts, vote against giving medals to cops? Because the bill described the rioters as “a mob of insurrectionists.”

Thomas Massie from Kentucky (a yee-haw state) said, “If they just wanted to give the police recognition, they could have done it without trying to make it partisan, without sticking that in there.” Once again, a Republican steps all over himself and says the quiet part out loud. Insurrections are partisan…and insurrections are Republican.

Opposing ISIS and al Qaeda is easy…but I guess it’s harder to oppose terrorism when the terrorists look like you, eh, white boy?

This will be a shocker but Marjorie Taylor Greene also voted no and said she did so because the bill referred to the Capitol as a “temple” and it doesn’t look anything like “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.” She also said, “I wouldn’t call it an insurrection.” Would she call it “tourism” as another Republican has? In her defense, she did just find out about the Holocaust. Did you guys hear about this Holocaust thing? Who knew? We should tell more people.

Scott Perry, a Republican from Pennsylvania, said giving the medal to cops was “disgusting.” No, disgusting was in “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” when they ate all the live squirmy baby snakes. Giving medals to cops, not so much. But hey, feel free to tear the Capitol Police officers’ beating hearts out.

The 21 Republicans siding with terrorists over cops are Marjorie Taylor Green, Scott Perry, Thomas Massie, Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, Andy Biggs, Michael Cloud, Andrew Clyde, Warren Davidson, Louie Gohmert, Bob Good, Paul Gosar, Andy Harris, Jody Hice, Mary Miller, Barry Moore, Ralph Norman, John Rose, Matt Rosendale, Chip Roy, and Greg Steube.

I know. A lot of names on that list truly come as a surprise. In case you’re a Republican, that was sarcasm.

Gerald Connolly, a Democrat from Virginia, said, “They voted to overturn the election. But in their vote today, they kind of sealed the deal of basically affiliating with the mob.” Dude, every single Republican who professes loyalty to Donald Trump, says he’s the leader of their party, rushes to Mar-a-Lago for a photo-op with the goon, and says he won the election has sealed the deal of siding with terrorists. They bought that puppy, put it in a box, giftwrapped it, didn’t poke any any airholes into the box, and mailed it without a return address.

Connolly also said, “They now are part of the insurrectionist mob. They brought enormous disrepute and dishonor on themselves in not honoring the brave men and women who defended the Capitol of the United States—everybody in it, but also defending the symbol of democracy in the world, not just here in the United States.”

Putin would be proud.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have two copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

Watch me draw: