Golf

An Incalculable Loss


cjones05272020

During Memorial Day weekend, while the U.S. death toll from the coronavirus was nearing 100,000, and after he had called for the reopening of the nation’s churches, Donald Trump was playing golf. In fact, he hit the course that he owns in Virginia, twice. Quite frankly, I’m surprised he felt confident enough about his safety to play in Virginia since we can’t “protect our potatoes.” He also kinda looks like a giant sweet potato where the sweetness was substituted with racism.

The New York Times ran a front-page Sunday listing the victims of the coronavirus. Of course, they couldn’t all fit on the front page so it continued to the inside pages.

Donald Trump criticized President Obama for playing golf during the Ebola crisis. That crisis killed two people. Donald Trump promised during the 2016 election that he would be “too busy” to play golf. As it turns out now, he’s played more in three and a half years than Obama did in eight. He defended his golf playing last weekend in a rambling rant saying the media was making it sound like a “mortal sin” that he was going outside and  getting a “little exercise.” I’ve played golf. I don’t think it’s that much exercise to ride around in a golf cart. He doesn’t even walk to the green. He parks on it.

And then, Trump went on to attack President Obama for playing golf…after he had played golf. About the media’s scrutiny, Trump tweeted, “I knew this would happen!” Well, he should have known it was going to happen because he spent years attacking Obama for playing golf. What Donald Trump seems to miss was the criticism wasn’t over him playing golf. It was over him playing golf during this pandemic and as the death toll soared near 100,000. It’s hard to read between the lines if you’re incapable of even reading the lines.

About that death toll: During his golf-laden weekend at his own resort (where he got to once again charge the Secret Service for golf cart rentals), Trump spread a conspiracy theory accusing a TV news host of murder. He retweeted tweets that made fun of Nancy Pelosi’s “dentures,” that made cracks about Georgia’s Stacey Abrams “hitting every buffet” in that state,” and that called Hillary Clinton a “skank.” Do you know how many of Trump’s tweets mentioned the victims of the coronavirus? None. All his tweets were about him, skanks, Polident, and buffets. Do you remember when Trump promised after he was elected he’d be presidential? Trust me. He made that promise.

One of my colleagues, Steve Brodner, issued a challenge for American political cartoonists to draw Donald Trump teeing off on the front page of The New York Times. This is my offering.

I saw a Facebook post by a conservative MAGAt cartoonist who questioned this campaign. He wrote, “Can’t believe so many cartoonists doing someone else’s lame idea.” That guy kinda retired from drawing political cartoons, but that makes sense since he doesn’t get it’s not about one person’s lame idea. It’s a protest where the message is strengthened and made louder by the numbers involved. He gets there’s strength in numbers, right? He’s heard Trump’s lies about crowd sizes. I guess leaving a one-sentence criticism was a lot easier than actually thinking up and doing one defending his orange messiah.

I don’t know how large this campaign will become. So far, I’ve seen about 20 of these and you can see a bunch of them here at Steve’s Facebook page (again. Cartoonists. Get a website). There are some really great ones in that batch and I’m not referring to mine because my cartoon isn’t included.

I created the cartoon just for the social media campaign. I didn’t put a lot of thought into it. Afterward, I realized some of my clients might like it (one has already ran it) so I sent it to them. And since I didn’t realize it could be its own free-standing cartoon while I was doing it, I didn’t make a video of it. Sorry.

And since not everyone who reads me here follows me on social media, I figured I should go ahead and blog it.

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New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

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Fully Engaged


cjones09102019

Don’t worry about Hurricane Dorian, America. Donald Trump is “fully engaged” At least that’s what White House Press Secretary Stephanie Grisham said.

Trump decided to be fully engaged from a golf cart at his resort in Virginia. He went golfing twice over the weekend (first at Camp David but that was a bit too slummy for him) and demonstrated his full-on engagement by warning Alabama that the hurricane was coming. Except, it’s not going anywhere near Alabama and the National Weather Service replied to this tweet with a tweet of their own saying, “We repeat, no impacts from Hurricane Dorian will be felt across Alabama.”

Trump attacked an ABC reporter for reporting Trump’s bone-headed weather report and said, “Always good to be prepared.” Since Alabama is a state where Trump has high approval ratings, they’re probably nailing plywood to their windows up in Huntsville…and in Oklahoma.

The ABC reporter wasn’t the only victim of Trump’s weekend tweeting during a national crisis. He sent out 122 tweets since Saturday morning attacking the media, James Comey, “the Squad,” the AFL-CIO president, and even actress Debra Messing.

Trump continued being engaged by informing the public that Dorian was at a category 5, the highest degree measured by meteorologists for hurricanes (before they turn into sharknados). Trump tweeted that he had never heard of a Category 5, tweeting, “A Category 5 is something that I don’t know that I’ve even heard the term, other than I know it’s there. That’s the ultimate.” It’s funny that he’s never heard the term “Category 5” before since, in 2017, he said the same thing. Dorian is the fourth Category 5 to threaten the United States during Trump’s presidency, yet he’s never heard of one before.

Keep in mind, this is a guy who knows so much about hurricanes that he thinks a nuclear bomb would solve them, yet he’s never heard of a Category 5. At any moment now, he should be tweeting that he knows more than the meteorologists.

Trump supporters, sycophants, and cultists who may be in the path of a hurricane. Do yourself a favor and suspend your faith in Donald Trump at least until the crisis is over. If you’re taking advice from Trump, you could die. It will be classified as “death by dumbass.” Do not monitor his Twitter feed for updates. This is a guy too preoccupied with scratching his ass and stealing golf balls from children (he’s done that) to worry about your safety. Also, he’s stubborn and will not allow himself to believe any basic facts if they contradict any longheld stupid-ass beliefs or conspiracy theories. Do not take survival advice from a conspiracy theorist. In fact, you might want to turn off Fox News while you’re at it. You don’t need Hannity and Tucker telling you that Trump’s coming to save you because he can walk on water.

Trump told us he’d be too busy presidenting to golf, unlike President Obama. But as you know by now, that was a lie. Trump is not too busy to play golf, even with a massive hurricane bearing down on the east coast of the United States. Trump has been so not busy presidenting that he’s been able to golf 227 times at one of his clubs since entering the White House.

But, since some people were stupid enough to sign up for Trump University, there will be people dumb enough to take his hurricane advice. But then again, who am I to complain? If we have more candidates for Darwin Awards, this entire Trump mess may balance itself out.

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

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Trumpy Gator Balls


cjones04082019

Golfer Arnold Palmer has been quoted, “I never do a business deal until I played 18 holes with a guy.” The logic is that in four hours (which I’m assuming is how long it takes to play 18 holes), you can’t hide who you are. If you’re nice, pleasant, honest, rude, impatient, or a cheater, it’s going to come out. I’ve heard golfers claim that you play life the way you play golf. A good argument for that analogy’s veracity is Donald Trump. 

Trump cheats at golf. Shocking, right? Sports writer Rick Reilly has written a book, Commander in Cheat, that chronicles the way Trump plays golf and operates as a course owner and operator. Reilly examines the way Trump’s courses resemble mini golf with waterfalls (all that’s missing is shooting the ball into a clown’s mouth, but he owns the course), and despite his claim of having the greatest courses in the world, not one of them is included in the top 150 in America. What’s really intriguing are the multiple details of Trump’s cheating and his lack of respect for the game he loves so much.

Trump was very critical of the time Obama spent playing golf as president. Trump even criticized his golf game. He promised he’d be too busy as president to play golf and that he’d never leave the White House. Of course, he lied. According to the website Trump Golf Count, he’s visited his courses as president 77 times as of March 31 (if you’re a Republican, that was three days ago), at a cost of $95,000,000. Basically, we’re paying for Trump to cheat at golf.

Reilly has documented that of the 18 club championships Trump claims, maybe only two are legitimate. He’s even claimed two championships he didn’t play in, once when he was at a different course. When he’s actually playing in a game, he’s known to cheat. He kicks his ball so often that caddies have given him the nickname “Pelé.”

Trump doesn’t just move his ball, he’ll move his opponents. Once, after his ball had gone into the water, he stole a ball belonging to a teenager. The book also documents that Trump once threw Sportscaster Mike Tirico’s ball into a bunker after it was only ten feet from the hole. Trump claims a 2.8 handicap, but everyone Reilly speaks to says it’s more like a 7 or an 8.

He disrespects the game other ways too. He always tees off first, even if he didn’t win the last hole. He drives his carts on the green. He also drives his cart down the fairway before the other golfers have hit their drives.

Trump is like a child who has to have the biggest piece of cake. He always has to win, even if he didn’t. After cheating, which is always obvious to those he played with, he brags to them about winning, being oblivious to the fact they know. You don’t hit the ball seven times then tell Tiger Woods you’re playing for a birdie. Tiger knows.

Just like golf, Trump cheats at life. He steals from charities. He cheats on his taxes. He cheats contractors. He cheats lenders. He cheats on his wives. He cheated by stealing a Supreme Court seat, then cheated by having the rules of confirmation changed. And of course, he cheated when he stole an election with the help of Russia. Just like in golf, he thinks if he lies about it then nobody will notice.

It’s also cheating when he betrays our trust. We were aware that Trump gave high-level security clearances to Ivanka and Jared after they were rejected, but now we have learned he’s done it for others at least 25 times. Trump has the authority to grant security clearances to whoever he wants to receive them, but when we elect people, we expect them to use their powers responsibly. No rational person has ever expected Donald Trump to act responsibly, but his handing out security clearances like candy is a threat to national security. For the love of god, Jared has been communicating with the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia through WhatsApp. Trump’s cheating is a danger to the nation.

People who play golf with Trump or work at his clubs enable him by nodding along when he boasts about his prowess as a golfer, all while they know he’s cheating and lying. At least in their cases, he’s either paying them or buying their lunch. His supporters also enable his lies by continuing to support and defend him, which doesn’t make any sense at all. Trump’s not buying their lunch.

Discovering that Trump cheats at everything is about as surprising as learning he’s a vile, ugly, horrible person without any regard for anything that’s not named Trump. Reilly says he wrote his book on Trump’s cheating, not from being offended as a voter but as a golfer. Personally, when it comes to Trump, I’m offended as a human being.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

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Comic Strip Of The Day Goes Golfing


cjones08252014

Comic Strip Of The Day used this cartoon today to talk about the misinformation that right keeps spreading about Obama’s vacations.  You know, that he takes a lot of vacations, though W. took more and they were and still are silent about that.

Nancy Reagan once said the president doesn’t take vacations, he only changes his scenery.  You can’t really complain about the expense of a presidential vacation.  Presidents pay for their own vacations.  The staff will be paid anyway.  There is expense of staff lodging and travel and for Air Force One, but it’s not like that plane is always in a hangar.

Mike, the blogger at CSOTD, mentions that cartoonists should read the comments where their cartoons are posted.  I scan them.  I don’t read them all as they tend to turn into flame wars.  I’ll read some at the Free Lance-Star site, Gocomics and Daily Kos and various newspaper clients of mine that post my cartoons.  I don’t read them to change my work or outlook.  I just like to see how people are responding, even the critics.  I especially enjoy the comments left by people who don’t like my cartoons but comment on them every day.

Anyway, thanks again CSOTD.  I kinda had a feeling you would use this cartoon today.

Did You Hear The One About…


cjones08252014

Conservatives don’t tire of saying the same old joke over and over.  Yes, Obama plays golf.  What else should a president do on vacation?  Clear brush?  Ride a bike?  Seeing that the release of a hostage by Islamic terrorist was just negotiated, Obama does a better job while on vacation that Bush W. could do with all his focus.

Republicans must get the same GOP talking points.  I’ve seen a hundred golf cartoons over the past two weeks.  I’ve seen four cartoons by one cartoonist on the golf thing.  Conservatives aren’t good with humor.  We’re talking about a group that finds racists, homophobic, sexists and misogynist jokes are clever.

You would think Republicans would cut Obama some slack seeing that he’s playing the whitest game ever.