Dotard

Face-Melting Diplomacy


cjones05312019

National security adviser John Bolton is a war hawk. Even though he personally refused to fight in Vietnam and admitted he joined the Maryland National Guard to avoid fighting, he’s advocated for sending American troops to die in Iraq, Iran, Syria, Cuba, Yemen, Venezuela, and North Korea. Like most Republican war hawks, he thinks it’s a great idea for other people to fight wars as long as he doesn’t have to.  So, it pains me that I have to actually agree with John Bolton on something. North Korea violated UN Sanctions when it fired off several ballistic missiles in early May.

In 2006, while Bolton was U.S. ambassador to the UN, sanctions were levied upon North Korea stating that the DPRK “not conduct any further nuclear test or launch of a ballistic missile.” These sanctions were expanded in 2009. While the missiles they tested this month were short-range, they were ballistic missiles.

Shortly after the test, the American president, ugh, Donald Trump told Politico, “these were short-range missiles and very standard stuff. Very standard.” The American president was defending a dictator’s violation of a United Nations resolution. But hey, defending tyrants and Nazis for Trump is “very standard stuff.”

Last weekend between golf, eating burnt steak with ketchup, and watching obese men grapple in diapers, Trump furthered his defense of the North Korean tyrant in a tweet stating, “North Korea fired off some small weapons, which disturbed some of my people, and others, but not me.” He expressed confidence that Kim Jong Un will keep his “promise” to him to denuclearize, even though there’s no commitment on paper.

But, why should Kim denuclearize when Trump is giving him a pass? Trump earlier stated he wouldn’t tolerate any more missile tests because it was he who got Kim to stop firing missiles. Now that Kim has fired off some missiles, Trump is backtracking on principles faster than Mitch McConnell. Trump was much more interested in Kim’s insults toward his most feared political rival, Joe Biden.

What Trump is teaching dictators is that if they pander to his ego and narcissism, throw him an occasional parade, give him a sword dance, put his face on outside jumbotrons, mimic his talking points, and attack his political opponents, then they can do whatever they want, from attacking our elections, murdering journalists, to firing ballistic missiles in violations of UN sanctions.

Bolton is correct that North Korea violated a UN sanction. Trump is ignoring his national security adviser and American intelligence by demonstrating he doesn’t possess any intelligence of his own.

Trump criticized former American presidents for accepting promises from Kim and later allowing him to break them. Now, when Kim breaks his promises to him, Trump denies it’s happening. His ego and narcissism is a threat to the lives of Americans and our allies.

When his cultists’ faces are melting from a nuclear blast, will they finally accept that Trump is a disaster?

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch Me Draw.

Low IQ Dotard


cjones05302019

While in Japan, Donald Trump reminded us of two of the many reasons he doesn’t have the character required of an American president.

First, he engaged in politics against a political rival on foreign soil. That’s always been a no-no in American politics. You don’t go on foreign soil and attack Americans. When you go on a trip, you leave your dirty laundry at home. It’s petty, but then again, Trump is a petty human being.

This week, North Korea’s state-run media (something Trump dreams of having in the U.S. other than just Fox News), attacked Joe Biden and said he was a “fool of low IQ.” The DPRK was upset that Biden referred to Kim Jong Un as a tyrant, something Trump refuses to acknowledge anymore about a dictator who starves his own people, runs gulags, murders those he considers disloyal like his own brother, and shoots anyone who makes a run for the border. Instead of agreeing with Joe Biden that Kim is a tyrant, Trump agreed with the tyrant that Biden has a low IQ.

It took Trump two tweets because he couldn’t figure out how to spell “Biden,” but he eventually agreed with Kim that “Swampman Joe Biden has a low IQ.” He also questioned if Kim was sending him a signal. What sort of signal is he talking about? An endorsement from a dictator? Hey, it wouldn’t be his first.

For all the partisan politics of his time, Ronald Reagan never sided with Leonid Brezhnev over Walter Mondale.

While playing petty politics and yukking it up with a dictator over a political opponent is crass and pathetic, it’s not as horrifying as the second reason he gave us that he doesn’t have the temperament, brains, or loyalty required to be president. It involves a much more serious issue in which he took Kim’s word over his own national intelligence.

Last week, North Korea fired off a few ballistic missiles, an act that violates United Nations’ resolutions and even a promise Kim made to Trump. Trump’s own National Security Adviser, Captain Mustache John Bolton said he had no doubts North Korea violated UN resolutions with the missile launches. Trump didn’t just disagree with  Bolton on the violations, he disagreed that Kim fired ballistic missiles. Trump, the 10,000-liar, is claiming something didn’t happen that happened.

For months, Trump has said everything was cool between him and Kim as long as he didn’t fire any missiles or test nukes. Now that Kim is firing missiles again, the narcissism in Trump can’t admit he was wrong or that he made a mistake in trusting Kim. He would rather gaslight his own nation, disagrees with his own national intelligence, and U.S. allies just to protect his ego.

In the same tweet that attacked Biden, Trump said, “North Korea fired off some small weapons which disturbed some of my people, and others, but not me.” In the same sentence, he went from Kim firing off missiles to attacking Joe Biden. Trump was more interested in attacking a political opponent than protecting American interests.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders went to Japan with Trump. While not winning the Sumo trophy, she did go on Meet the Press to defend Trump’s disloyalty to his nation, our allies, and even to his own intelligence. She said, “The president’s focus in all of this process is on continuing the very good relationship that he has with Chairman Kim. And he feels good that the chairman will stay firm with the commitment that he made to the president and move towards denuclearization.

This is more gaslighting as North Korea has not made a commitment of any sort to denuclearize. The one agreement they signed doesn’t have any specifics.

Sanders argued against criticism that both summits Trump had with Kim weren’t fruitless. She said, “For a significant period of time there was no missile testing. We got hostages back home to the United States and remains of American war heroes. I don’t know how you can say that that’s nothing.” Eleven prisoners were released by North Korea during the Obama presidency without bullshit summits or ransom payments, unlike how Trump got three prisoners released. And in case Sanders hasn’t noticed, they’re firing missiles again. That would be like defending the Nazis by arguing for a significant period of time, they didn’t invade Poland.

Trump often agrees with enemies of the United States and starts to use their language and arguments. He and Vladimir Putin have the same “no collusion” stance. They both use the term “fake news.” Recently, Trump repeated Russian state propaganda that they had the right to invade Afghanistan because of terrorist attacks (which isn’t true).

Kim was testing Trump by firing ballistic missiles. Trump’s reaction tells Kim that he can do anything he wants. Why would he denuclearize if the American president won’t hold him accountable or even acknowledge his transgressions? Trump went from calling Kim “Rocket Man” to being unable to acknowledge there are any rockets.

Trump loves tyrants and dictators. He hopes to become one himself someday. Even before his kissy summit with Kim, he referred to him as a “smart cookie” for his ability to threaten and murder people to gain and retain power. He believes we should listen to Kim’s wisdom when he insults Joe Biden. He probably wants us to forget, and if you’re a Trump cultist then you have forgotten, that Kim once referred to Donald Trump as a “dotard.” That does not mean “stable genius.”

What Donald Trump did in Japan was remind us that no dotard should be president of the United States.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch Me Draw.

Dotard


cjones09252017

A lot of people were introduced to the Elton John song “Tiny Dancer” by the movie “Almost Famous.” For others, it was when they fell in love with it all over again. It’s the part of the film where a rock band is on their tour bus and everyone, including the band, roadies, groupies, and the underage Rolling Stone reporter all start singing along to the chorus. It probably would have ruined the song for me if the TV show “Friends” hadn’t already done that with the “hold me closer, Tony Danza” episode.

It’s hard to make the belligerents in a cartoon look more ridiculous than they actually are when the subjects are Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un. The only victim in this situation (so far) is Elton John.

I hate to say that Trump is out of his league in his war of childish insults with the leader of North Korea, as it may come off as defending Kim Jong Un (but it’s OK if Trump defends Russia from attacking the United States). But, it’s not a compliment to say one is better at being an immature and irrational human being. The reason Trump is out of his league is twofold.

First, despite Trump’s claim that he has “the best words,” Kim took him to school this week. In fact, Kim took a lot of people to school as the entire nation was looking up the definition of “dotard.” Kim has already brought more knowledge to Americans than Betsy DeVos, the Secretary of Education.

Several years ago when Clay Aiken was famous, I would have his name thrown at me every time I spoke at an elementary school. Calling me “Clay Aiken” was the type of thing that’s funny and creative to an eight-year-old. Occasionally an adult would use it and it would inform me immediately that I was dealing with a person whose growth was stunted. That’s what we’re dealing with in Donald Trump. Also, when someone comes up with a name and they stick with it, repeating it over and over, is a sign of a dumbass who probably watches a lot of professional wrestling.

Trump’s mind stopped developing around when he was eleven-years-old. For him, “loser,” “crooked,” and “lying” are big words and they’re extremely creative. Take “fake news” as an example. It doesn’t even work. If it’s fake then it’s not news. They say dogs can learn up to 200 words. Trump might know 97.

So, when you hear conservatives repeating words used by Donald Trump, you know who you’re dealing with. Last night, there was a rally in Alabama full of those people.

Kim is probably an intelligent person despite the insanity. But, when you’re raised in a culture that’s telling 25 million people you’re a god who can talk to dolphins, it’s probably going to go to your head. Even if he is smart, I’m sure he labored with input from others in writing his “personal” response to Trump.

In contrast, Donald Trump tweets at 3:00 AM, probably while sitting on the toilet, and he has delete, retweet, delete, retweet, before he finally lands on the correct spelling for “unprecedented.” We’re still trying to figure out “Covfefe.”

Kim has never responded personally. Usually, the statements are from the government, which represents all the people of the DPRK. I can assure you, Trump’s tweets do not speak for this nation. You’re not tying me to that shit.

Kim felt the need to respond personally after Trump spoke to the U.N. and threatened to destroy North Korea, while also calling him “Rocket Man.” And, this is the second point where Trump is out of his league.

Trump doesn’t know what he’s doing. In Kim’s response, he said that Trump is “mentally deranged.” The North Koreans are prone to hyperbole and insults, like threatening to destroy South Korea, the USA, and calling Obama a “monkey.” But, they’re not far off in calling Trump “mentally deranged.” Hey, even a broken clock is right twice a day. The other response from the DPRK is their foreign minister’s statement that they may explode a hydrogen bomb over the Pacific Ocean. This would be bad.

I hope Donald Trump understands the Pacific Ocean is that big body of water between the United States and Japan. It’s not Pacsun, the clothing store in malls. Maybe he can remember the Pacific Ocean by being reminded it’s where he lost that aircraft carrier.

Trump’s bullying and tough talk isn’t working out diplomatically. His threats only confirm to North Korea that they have to keep their nuclear weapons and continue to develop their missile system. At some point, something’s going to explode over a large population.

When people start dying, I don’t think anyone’s going to believe our toddler as an excuse for a president has the best words.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.