Christmas

Happy Birthday, Jesus

Another thing I find revolting about Republicans is that they spend the entire year being as vile as humanly possible, and then on Christmas and Easter, they’re all about Jesus.

I scrolled through Twitter yesterday and saw posts from the most despicable, like Lauren Boebert, Ted Cruz, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Matt Gaetz praising Jesus and celebrating Christmas, after spending an entire year lying their gaslighting balls off and wishing evil shit on people.

But none of those goons have the power to be as evil as Donald Trump, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, or Texas Governor Greg Abbott. Each of these men was or is presently in an executive position where he can order government agencies to hurt people. And they do it for their own political fortunes.

Trump made it a policy to separate families and put children in cages. DeSantis went out of his way to deport refugees, not from the state he’s actually governor of, but from Texas to Martha’s Vineyard. Trust me, Ron…Texas has enough assholes that it doesn’t need your efforts, case in point…Greg Abbott. Abbott started the Republican trend of shipping migrants and refugees to sanctuary cities, but what he did over the past weekend might be the evilest thing he’s done so far.

On Christmas day, Greg Abbott tweeted a photo of himself and his beautiful family saying “From our family to yours, Merry Christmas.” He also tweeted, “May the hopeful promise of our Savior’s birth bring comfort & joy to you & your family.” He and his family looked warm and cozy in that photo.

But a few hours before that tweet, buses from Texas with 130 refugees, many dressed in only T-shirts, were dropped off in front of the vice president’s residence in Washington, D.C. in sub-zero conditions without any advance notice.

I’m not a Jesus expert and I don’t claim to be a Christian so I can’t tell you what Jesus would do, but he wouldn’t do this.

Officials in New York City received an advance warning these refugees were coming, and that might be why they were re-routed to D.C. Republicans have to make these stunts as cruel as possible.

White House spokesperson Abdullah Hasan accused Abbott of having “abandoned children on the side of the road in below-freezing temperatures” on Christmas Eve without coordinating with any federal or local authorities. You can’t claim this is to help people when you don’t give any advance notification. You also can’t claim it’s to help them when you kick them out of the bus in these temperatures and then abandon them.

There are fair points to the arguments that border states carry an unfair burden in dealing with immigration, and they do deserve more support from the federal government, but this isn’t a solution. There are other ways to make that point than being cruel to the most vulnerable…but maybe the point is to be cruel. Republicans love that shit. Abbott won re-election last month with nearly 55 percent of the vote from Texans. The majority of Texans are all about yee-hawing this sort of cruelty.

Responding to Abbott’s Christmas day tweet, Jon B. Wolfsthal, a senior adviser at Global Zero and ex-adviser to then-Vice President Biden, tweeted: “Did you tweet this before or after you shipped 130 migrants to DC with no extra clothes on the coldest night of the year—which also happened to be Christmas?”

Photojournalist Paul Gillespie replied to Abbott’s Christmas post, tweeting, “Dude, really? You just sent three bus loads of would be Mary and Joseph’s from TX to NY on 9 degree Christmas eve. You all got to stop playing the Christian card. You go against everything he preached. At least the inn keeper let them stay in the manger.”

One user on Twitter posted, “There’s nothing Christian or loving about stunts like this, Greg. In fact, it’s more like Herod than anything else in the Christmas story. I feel sick.”

Amy Fischer, an organizer with The Migrant Solidarity Mutual Aid Network, said, “It really does show the cruelty behind Governor Abbott and his insistence on continuing to bus people here without care about people arriving late at night on Christmas Eve when the weather is so cold. People are getting off the buses, they don’t have coats, they don’t have clothes for this kind of weather, and they’re freezing.”

Living in the Washington area, I can assure you it was freezing and painfully cold on Christmas Eve. The temps weren’t just in the teens and below, it was windy. I walked to a party Friday night and the conditions were physically painful.

Greg Abbott and other Republicans are trying to make a point about immigration, but the only point they’re making is that they’re assholes. And that may be the point they’re really trying to prove because their base loves it. But I bet Jesus doesn’t.

You can’t convince people you’re a Christian or love the messages of Jesus when you’re hurting the most vulnerable for a political stunt.

1 John 3:17 says, “But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?” God’s love doesn’t abide in the hearts of Republicans, but they do like to tweet photos pretending it does.

And you don’t own the libs by being an asshole.

Facebook Suspension Update: There are 17 days left in my Facebook suspension for typing the word “Taliban.” Here’s Quannah’s countdown clock.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

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Doxxing Santa

I don’t know why, but I love NORAD’s Santa Tracker. I open it on Christmas eve and watch Santa and his reindeer fly around the planet. Maybe it’s because I’m a geography buff or I just love the imagination with it. I’m not even that much of a Christmas fan, but I like the Santa Tracker. I leave it open in a tab while doing other things. I’m a multitasker.

I do wish the Santa Tracker was online when my kid was little because then I could have used it to get him to go to bed. But then again, he could have used it against me too like pointing out that Santa was in New Zealand, so he could stay up for a few more hours.

This year, however, you may not be able to keep track of Santa by following NORAD’s Santa Tracker Twitter account because Elon has rules against doxxing. Although, Santa Claus is pretty generous, doesn’t share hate, and despite being all clad in red, he’s not a MAGAT, so maybe the rules won’t apply to doxxing his location. Elon seems to be making up new Twitter rules as he goes along.

Last week, he suspended an account for tracking his private jet, which is public information. Elon created this rule out of self-interest and didn’t tell anyone until he suspended the jet-tracking account. Later, he suspended the accounts of several journalists who had linked to the jet account or stories about the jet account. He suspended some just for mentioning it.

A few days ago, Elon suspended the account of a Washington Post reporter for doxxing the location of the creator of the account Libs of Tiktok, which is an anti-LGBTQ hate account. The funny thing though, the reporter did the doxxing last April by revealing the creator as Brooklyn real estate agent Chaya Raichik. Now when I post the link to this blog, I’ll be in violation of Elon’s Twitter rules but he probably won’t notice because I’m not a big deal.

Elon believes that tweeting hate on his platform anonymously is OK, but outing them is a terms-of-service violation.

The suspension of Taylor Lorenz’s account also came after she had tagged him in a tweet seeking a comment on a story, which he must not have liked.

Let’s hope Elon doesn’t suspend me or NORAD for Christmas. He’s currently looking for someone to replace him, but I don’t know if he can find someone who’s that much of an asshole.

Music note: Today’s tunes to toon to was by Jefferson Airplane.

Facebook Suspension Update: There are 23 days left in my Facebook suspension for typing the word “Taliban.” Here’s Quannah’s countdown clock.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Treasonous Humbugger

The House Select Committee investigating the January 6 insurrection and coup attempt has issued four criminal referrals of Donald Trump to the Department of Justice. Donald Trump’s initial reaction to this is, “Bah humbug…have you seen my NFT trading cards?”

Trump “truthed” out that the committee is partisan and what doesn’t kill him makes him stronger, bwahahahahaha,” and then followed that with multiple other “truths” full of lies, too numerous to mention here.

The thing is though, the committee is actually bipartisan. Trump and his fellow GOP goons believe it’s partisan because no seditious sycophants are on it. And Trump can’t claim the committee is lying to anyone who has actually paid attention. The charges are very detailed and specific.

The committee is referrals include insurrection, obstruction of an official proceeding, conspiracy to defraud the United States, and conspiracy to make a false statement.

Other than the power of persuasion, the committee’s referrals don’t hold actual power. At the most, these referrals may pressure DOJ to charge Trump with these criminal acts.

Additionally, Trump lawyer John Eastman is also slated to be referred for obstruction of a congressional proceeding and conspiracy to defraud the United States. The report also cites members of Congress who failed to comply with subpoenas issued to them, which the committee will refer to the House Ethics Committee for further action. This includes House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy, Jim Jordan, and Scott Perry.

It is extreme for a congressional committee to issue criminal referrals for a former president (sic), but it’s also extreme for a president (sic) to deny a peaceful transfer of power and attempt an insurrection to cling to stay in the White House.

The facts are that Donald Trump tried to stay in office after losing an election, used his office to intimidate election officials to give him “votes,” created a fake slate of electors, pressured the vice president to disobey the Constitution and deny certification of the Electoral College, and disrupted an official proceeding with a terrorist attack on Congress by white nationalist MAGAts. As if that wasn’t enough, he engaged in witness tampering during the committee’s investigation.

What will Jack Smith, the Special Counsel investigating Trump on multiple counts, do with the referrals? For all we know, he made up his mind on each of these weeks ago. None of these accusations are new. I hope Smith goes for all four and then some…or then a lot more.

Donald Trump is a criminal. He’s a bad guy. We can’t just prosecute the MAGAt minions and let the crime boss get away. Justice and the rule of law demand that Donald Trump be prosecuted.

Music note: Today’s tunes to toon to was by Jets to Brazil.

Facebook Suspension Update: There are 23 days left in my Facebook suspension for typing the word “Taliban.” Here’s Quannah’s countdown clock.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

A Thristhmas Sthory

I was thinking this morning that I need to give my clients a few different options in Christmas cartoons, and maybe incorporate them into some heavy subjects, like the Defense of Marriage Act, Title 42, and maybe Kevin McCarthy’s floundering and petulant attempt to become Speaker of the House. But then I thought of this and as Laura, one of my proofreaders said when she saw it, “Sometimes a LOL is enough.”

Besides, it’s Sunday and I do draw a brand new cartoon every single flipping day, and I have five more cartoons to draw before I reach file number 12252022. So, you’re getting another insipid Trump cartoon today instead of something heavy and meaningful because it made me LOL.

Also, if any cartoonist has drawn this same idea in years past, I apologize. I may have gotten the idea from the iPhone commercial with Zach Braff and Donald Faison. I love those guys.

Facebook Suspension Update: There are 26 days left in my Facebook suspension for typing the word “Taliban.” Here’s Quannah’s countdown clock.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Laptop Wishes

Here’s a Santa’s lap cartoon about Hunter Biden’s laptop. I’m not a big fan of using the Santa’s lap cliché in political cartoons, but I liked the correlation here. Maybe I’m the only one who will get it. But I also wanted to take the opportunity to use Christmas to point out once again that there is NOTHING on this laptop incriminating or that provides any evidence of illegalities by either Hunter or his father, President Joe Biden.

Republicans make a lot of noise about Hunter Biden’s laptop and the Twitter Files without stating what’s in them or what they’re about. Most of the time when they mention either, it’s the mentioning that’s supposed to raise the alarm bells. But when they do claim that something is in them, they’re often lying. And some of the actual stuff that’s on the laptop they mention doesn’t really mean anything.

I was going to analyze and go over this cartoon for all the lies in it, but decided it’s not worth the time or grief it’ll bring, but trust me…everything in it is a lie, like on the level of a Ben Garrison lie. It’s ironic it’s titled “Except for the Facts, why worry?” when it doesn’t actually contain any facts. But what else would you expect from an American citizen and so-called journalist who works for a Russian state-owned propaganda outlet?

Republicans have nothing with this laptop business, but they’re going to make a lot of noise about it over the next two years without proving anything. Nothing criminal will ever come from it.

If you’re younger than ten, stop reading right here, but Santa Claus doesn’t exist…and neither does anything incriminating on Hunter’s laptop.

Music note: I listened to Outkast, but not to “Hey ya.”

Facebook Suspension note: I’m still suspended for 26 days. One of my friends made a countdown clock. Thank you, Quannah.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Little Shooter Boy

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America’s Little Shooter Boy is aiming (pun intended) for a great Christmas…for himself.

Kyle Rittenhouse is being wined (probably with Coors) and dined by what used to be the Republican establishment. Today, it’s a cult. The Trump cult is grabbing onto our nation’s gun culture. And one way to celebrate your gun fetish is to give platforms to gun celebrities. No, not Tom Selleck, but people like Rittenhouse and the mustard-loving gun owners in St. Louis who were prepared to defend their home when they saw black people walking in their neighborhood.

The 2020 Republican convention featured that ridiculous Sandmann Covington kid who had that face-off with a Native American in Washington. Why was he a celebrity? Because he sued several media outlets and got settlements that were most likely nuisance settlements. But, that was enough to make him a hero to the far-right. But his 15 minutes are running out and the Trump cult needs new “heroes.”

The convention also featured that couple from St. Louis. These two goons, Mark and Patricia McCloskey, live in a gated community. When they saw protesters, black people, walking down their street, they grabbed their guns and went outside so they could point them at the “trespassers.” They were so threatened by the crowd passing by their house, they didn’t have time to put on shoes or change into shirts without mustard stains before running outside with their guns. I mean, if they had taken the time to change into clothing without food stains, the protesters may have been gone. It’s not every day the McCloskey’s get to point their guns at black people.

After being found guilty on charges of misdemeanor harassment and misdemeanor assault in the fourth degree, fined, and having their guns confiscated, Mark McCloskey said, “Any time the mob approaches me, I’ll do what I can to put them in imminent threat of physical injury because that’s what kept them from destroying my house and my family.”

Really? That’s what kept them from destroying your house and family? How many other houses and families, that didn’t rush outside pointing guns, were destroyed by the “mob?” Also, if I’m walking on a sidewalk in front of your house, I’m NOT “approaching” you.

Mark McCloskey is using his newfound fame from hating and pointing guns at black people to run for the United States Senate as a member of the Tiny-Shriveled-Ineffective-Penis Party. Other people refer to that party as the Republican Party.

The shrinky-dinky guys aren’t just happy using Mustard Stain for their events. They’re now using Rittenhouse because he shot people and got away with it. He shot three people, killing two. Although all three were white, they were a part of a protest for Black Lives Matter.

Rittenhouse is the new anti-hero for Trumpers and other assorted morons with a gun fetish. He was doing an interview with Sean Hannity while on the car ride home after the trial. He’s been to Mar-a-Lago for a photo-op with Orange Julius Jesus. On Monday, he got to speak at Turning Point USA’s AmericaFest where he got a standing ovation for shooting people. I’m not sure he even spoke at the event.

These people cheering Rittenhouse should ask, “What would Jesus do?” But in our gun culture, they’ll probably ask instead, “Who would Jesus shoot?” But then again, these people who believe it’s Christian to shoot people, and make heroes out of the people who do, also think Jesus was white. Of course, they also made a Christian holiday out of a fake birthday for a Jewish guy.

Rittenhouse is also threatening to sue the media for saying bad things about him after he created a situation where he had to defend himself and shoot three people. Hey, Kyle. If you really want to be in situations where you have to defend yourself with a gun, join the Marines.

There are people who won’t be here this Christmas because they were killed by guns like the one Kyle used in Kenosha to shoot three people. But I’m sure Kyle’s Christmas will be happy. He’s not eating prison food and he probably just got a check from Turning Point USA. He’ll probably get future checks from the NRA and other conservative conventions.

Next year, Kyle should think about renting himself out for Republican Christmas cards. You know, the ones where the entire family is holding assault rifles. Let’s hope Kyle’s fame can last until next Christmas.

What would Jesus do? He wouldn’t do this.

Music note: The tunes I listened to while tooning this morning were by U2, The Vines, Hives, Goyte, and Imagine Dragons by accident. The player selected a song it assumed I would like, and it was kinda right. I thought “this doesn’t suck totally” and I kept listening. I looked to see who it was, and it was that band I’ve heard about but never heard of, Imagine Dragons. I probably never listened to them because it’s a stupid name.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

The Cliché That Stole Build Back Better

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I’m just having some fun here with my colleagues because I saw at least four Grinch/Manchin cartoons today before noon. OK, I’m exaggerating. It may have been 1 p.m. I am the Grinch in that I may have just stolen this from every cartoonist in the nation from using. And the ones who have used it can now feel a little chunky because of me. And I didn’t even have to climb down any chimneys.

Who am I kidding? We’re still going to see a few more Grinch/Manchin cartoons this week.

Music note: I didn’t listen to anything while drawing this cartoon but I did Google the song “Welcome Christmas” for the lyrics. Until today, I never knew what they were saying. What the fuck is “fahoo fores, dahoo dores?”

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Grinchy Paul

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Fun fact: Rand Paul is a jerk.

When Kentucky Senator Rand Paul isn’t screaming lies and conspiracy theories at Dr. Anthony Fauci, he’s blocking disaster relief…at least to states that are not Kentucky. How much do you have to suck to be the most despised Senator from your state even when the other senator is Mitch McConnell?

Rand Paul likes to argue he’s consistent in denying disaster relief to places hit by hurricanes, places such as Puerto Rico, Louisiana, Florida, Texas, New Jersey, New York, California, etc, etc. But he’s not consistent as he’s demanding disaster relief for his Kentucky after it was hit by tornadoes earlier this week. Maybe he voted for this one because he’s afraid that if he didn’t, his neighbor would kick his ass again.

During debates over disaster relief (yes, they had to debate this) for Texas, Florida, and Puerto Rico, Paul said, “People here will say they have great compassion and they want to help the people of Puerto Rico, the people of Texas, the people of Florida, but notice they have great compassion with someone else’s money. Ask them what they’re doing to help their fellow man.” Uh, by giving them disaster relief, you stupid fuck. That’s how they’re helping their fellow man…which is something they were elected to do. Rand Paul believes he was elected to be the nation’s number one asshole.

I suppose Rand Paul has finally found “great compassion with someone else’s money.” Rand Paul only wants to help Americans who are eligible to vote for him. If only there was a way we could single out who voted for who, so we give aid only to those who voted for the right candidate. Politicians, you serve every one of your constituents, even the ones who didn’t vote for you…or think you’re a dickless MAGAt lickspittle with your head up a giant orange ass.

The first relief package during the coronavirus pandemic passed in the Senate in March 2020 with only one senator voting against it. I’ll give you one guess who that Senator was (hint: He’s an asshole). Rand Paul also voted against aid for first responders who are still struggling with health problems from 9/11. How much federal medical insurance money do you think Rand Paul is going to demand for all the brain cells he burned out while his head was up Donald Trump’s ass?

Rand Paul claims he votes against federal assistance for people who aren’t eligible to vote for him because the money has to be borrowed. But where is the money coming from to provide disaster relief to Kentucky? Hell, where did the money come from to pay for Trump’s billionaire asshole tax cuts in 2017 that Rand Paul voted for? It didn’t come from inside Trump’s ass and Paul should know because that’s where his head’s been.

It’s not just Paul who’s a hypocrite here. In 2019, 43 of the 58 GOP House members who voted against a $19-billion disaster relief bill had earlier “demanded or endorsed emergency aid funding for their own states.” I apologize for using “asshole” for the hint to the previous question because there are a LOT of Republican assholes in Congress.

In 2013, a $50.5-billion relief package for Hurricane Sandy, which hit liberal Yankee states such as New Jersey and New York, was opposed by 39 Republicans in the Senate. Of those 39, 31 had demanded disaster aid for their own states. It’s kinda like when during the pandemic, Trump and his idiot son-in-law, one-half of Javanka, only wanted to help states that voted for Trump.

Here’s another fun fact: Of the states who receive the most federal aid than they kick into the federal government, Kentucky is in 6th place. For every dollar Kentucky sends to the federal government, they get back $2.25. The state’s dependency score is 54.5 percent according to Moneygeek. Out of the top ten states that are most dependent, eight of them are Republican states. They keep voting for politicians who are anti-government spending while they’re the fattest pigs at the trough. The most welfare-dependent states are Republican states. Weird how that works out.

Kentucky, don’t thank Rand Paul for the aid you’re receiving. Thank President Joe Biden. That’s who Mitch McConnell is thanking. He tweeted, “Thank you @POTUS for your rapid approval of Kentucky’s Major Disaster Declaration. I appreciate the Administration’s quick work to speed resources to help deal with this crisis.” You can also thank Kentucky Governor Andy Beshear who made the quick request.

If you’re in one of the eight states hit by these tornadoes, you can apply for disaster relief by clicking here. You can also call 1-800-621-FEMA. Hopefully, Rand Paul doesn’t answer the phone.

Music note: Today’s drawing music was the Beastie Boys.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Fox’s Flaming Fir

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Fox News Sunday host Chris Wallace surprised viewers and many of his colleagues yesterday by announcing that this would be his last show and he was leaving the network, effective immediately. Shortly after, CNN announced the hiring of Wallace to be an anchor on their upcoming streaming service, CNN Plus.

Wallace turned down a contract extension with a pay raise to jump ship to an actual news network.

Fox News is losing actual news journalists. Brett Bair is probably the only prominent one who remains at the network. Shepard Smith left for CNBC in 2019. Kristin Fisher is another who recently left. Now, goodbye, Chris Wallace, who may have been the network’s best journalist.

Fox News has used Wallace as proof they’re an actual news source while firing Chris Stirewalt two months after he called Arizona for President Biden (which made a huge part of their base leave temporarily for News Max).

Fox News is actually making their network even more conservative. The network has replaced its 7:00 PM news slot with a conservative commentary show. They moved back their 11:00 PM news show an hour to give the slot to pro-Trump goon Greg Gutfield, who conservatives think is funny. Greg Gutfield’s show is like giving another talk show to Chevy Chase, but with less humor.

The network has removed liberal Juan Williams from its show, “The Five,” and Democratic analyst Donna Brazile recently left for ABC News. Even conservative pundits, Stephen Hayes and Jonah Goldberg quit last month in protest of Tucker’s lying documentary.

According to inside sources at Fox (people who work there but hate it), Wallace was frustrated working at a supposed “news” network where the agenda was being crafted by conspiracy theorists. Even worse, much of the Fox News programming has been set by Donald Trump over the past five years. If Trump says it, much of the network repeats it as fact.

Fun fact: Donald Trump doesn’t say facts.

The insiders also report that Wallace, along with Brett Bair, had complained to network executives over Tucker Carlson’s constant lie the election was stolen. The sources also state Wallace was upset and had complained about a so-called “documentary” by Tucker, titled “Patriot Purge,” which includes the false claim that the riot was a “false flag” operation created to demonize the political right.

And then there has been the network’s coverage over its own Christmas tree. The tree outside the headquarters of Fox News on 6th Avenue was set on fire, allegedly by a homeless man who may be mentally ill. Fox News’ reaction to this is that it’s a “war on Christmas” and a “hate crime” against Fox News. If you listen to Christians, Christmas is under attack and persecuted in this country. Starbucks Happy Holiday cups are probably a hate crime for not saying, “Merry Christmas.”

Fox’s commentators have referred to the tree as, “America’s Tree,” though the tradition of Fox News putting up the tree was started in 2019. Jeanine Pirro said the burning of the tree is “pure evil.” She stated on air, “It’s about good versus evil! Period!”

Ainsley Earhardt, co-host of Fox & Friends comforted his concerned viewers by promising the network will “build it back better.” Ya’ mean by going to the store and buying a new fake tree? Ainsley raised the stakes now and for his sake, this tree better be better, godammit. Maybe Ainsley can volunteer to provide all-night security just to make sure the new tree is hobo-proof. Maybe Fox News can give him a whistle.

Fox & Friends Steve Doocy said, “Apparently lighting a Christmas tree on fire is not a hate crime.” Co-host Brian Kilmeade replied, “But it is! “Who says it’s not a hate crime against us – against Fox News?” So, Fox News is a religion now? Well, I guess is it a division of the Trump Cult.

Conservatives don’t believe the murder of Ahmaud Arbery while jogging was a hate crime, but setting this fake fucking tree on fire is. What’s the next Fox News hate crime, burning a MyPillow?

Another fun fact: Like much of Fox News, that tree had no soul.

Kilmeade then went on a rant about crime. He said, “There is so much crime in places that were always safe, including 48th and Sixth here. This is emblematic of these cities out of control, defame and defund the police, and this bail reform that has these men and women, these assailants, these suspects out before they can even finish the paperwork.”

He went on, “no person is safe and no city is safe.” No Christmas tree is safe from homeless vagrants. Before you can even finish the paperwork on arrested suspects, they make bail and set out to burn down another fake Christmas tree. This is the worst thing to happen to conservatism since that time Donald Trump was forced to go out in the rain to commemorate veterans. Tucker hasn’t taken a personal blow like this since he was kicked out of that Swiss boarding school for pampered special boys. We haven’t seen attack on white Christians like this since all those black people walked in front of those gun-toting mustard-loving conservatives’ home in St. Louis, or since CNN slandered the Covington Kid by pointing out he’s a huge dick, or since that time someone somewhere tricked Kyle Rittenhouse into drinking underage in a white nationalist bar. And if you listen to the Fox fuckers, you’d believe it was the worst thing to happen to New York City since 9/11.

And you know the jerks across the street at MSNBC were craning their necks out the window to gawk and laugh at this ungodly attack on the wholesome Christian purity of Fox News. Those MSNBC savages? Was Rachel giggling?

I’m mostly surprised they haven’t blamed this assault on their fake tree on President Biden, or Vice-President Kamala Harris, or Alexandria Ocasio Cortez, or Ilhan Omar, of the rest of the squad, or Antifa, or Black Lives Matter, or Dr. Fauci, or Starbucks holiday cups, or my cartoon yesterday on Mike Nesmith (you should see my inbox), or vaccines, or people who celebrate Kwanza, or…

No wonder Chris Wallace is leaving.

Music note: While drawing today’s cartoon, I listened to Taylor Swift’s Folklore album.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Keeping up with the Boeberts

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I’m starting to think people like Republican Representatives Thomas Massie and Lauren Boebert don’t understand the meaning of Christmas.

Both Congressional goons and full-time MAGATs posted their Christmas cards on social media, which is something politicians do. How nice. Usually, when politicians do that, it’s to display their Christmas spirit and to wish all their constituents happy holidays and best wishes for the new year. Sure, it includes a little pandering but that’s expected. They’re politicians. But, Christmas cards are usually non-partisan. Even Mitch McConnell will send out a Christmas card you can’t disagree with.

But for people like Massie and Boebert, it’s now to express their Christmas spirits as much as it’s to express how vile they are. These people lost their humanity a long time ago, so how can anyone expect them to understand the spirit of Christmas?

Sure, these goons claim to be Christians but it’s not very Christ-like to use his birthday to “own the libs.” It’s also not very Christian to use your children as political props…especially them as political props while holding weapons of death.

Representative Massie tweeted out a photo of him, his wife, and their five kids holding assault weapons in front of a Christmas tree. Not to be outdone, Lauren Boebert tweeted out a similar photo of her (with an evil grin) and her four boys holding assault weapons. And, this was just days after a school shooting where four people died.

A Trump cultist colleague of mine posted the Massie photo with the text, “Because of a horrible tragedy that takes place in the country, there’s a grace period one has to wait for which to express support for a Constitutional right? Bull!”

First off, if editors tell me “too soon” about doing a cartoon against gun violence after a horrible tragedy, then it should be too soon for fucknut dingleberry MAGAts to be posting photos of them and their children pretending to be gun fluffers.

It’s never too soon for your gun fetish, right MAGAts? If guns came with vaginas, these people would be sticking their thingies in them. In fact, I just gave the assault industry a billion-dollar idea. Fully-armed sex dolls. I demand a cut so I can donate to charities against gun violence.

The other part of my “friend’s” statement I take issues with is his claim they’re expressing support for a Constitutional right. Uh, why did they pick that right out of the many rights in the Constitution? But let me point out once again, you don’t support the Constitution. You can’t make that claim after you tried to overturn an election you lost, committed a terrorist attack against the nation, and tried to install a fascist dictator. You suck when it comes to the Constitution.

Even if you love guns, why can’t you see those Christmas cards for what they are? Can’t you support the Second Amendment while also agreeing that maybe the assault weapons should be in a locked closet during the holidays? Instead of assault weapons, wouldn’t it be nicer if your children were holding kittens?

If your idea of Christmas is to own the libs and trigger people, you’re not really getting it. This is the holiday celebrating the birth of your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Sure, I’m agnostic and more of a humanist, but I do believe in the Christmas spirit. There’s nothing wrong with it, which is basically…be nice. Love each other…even your enemies. Even though I don’t believe, I return a “merry Christmas” when one is given to me. I’m not a total dick. Instead of being a gun-fluffing dick, volunteer at a soup kitchen. Donate to Toys for Tots. Maybe adopt a rescue animal. It should not be about having your children coddling a weapon of death to fa-la-la-la about mass murders.

These are weapons of death. These assault weapons were made for just one purpose, which is to kill people. And when your weapon is made to hold rounds and rounds of ammunition that can shoot as quickly as possible in order to kill as many people as possible, it’s a weapon of death. It’s a weapon of mass murder. They’re not toys for you to give your children, even if it’s only for a photo-op to trigger liberals right after a similar weapon was used to kill four children.

This vile behavior from Republicans, at least openly, started with Trump. It’s like how Nazis didn’t start marching in public until they had a friend in the White House. But after Trump made it OK for Republicans to be a bunch of shit-asses by tweeting stuff like, “Happy Thanksgiving…even to Democrat losers” and “Happy Memorial Day, even to skanky Hillary and fat Stacey Abrams,” all bets were off with his base.

I expect there to be a lot of tweets saying, “Merry Christmas, and let’s go Brandon.”

Keep in mind, gun-loving parents, that when you’re posting Christmas card photos of your children holding weapons of death, that Hana St. Julian, Madisyn Baldwin, Tate Myre, and Justin Shilling won’t be celebrating Christmas ever again. Why?

Because they were killed at Oxford High School by a weapon very similar to the one your children are posing with.

Creative note: While drawing this cartoon, I listened to Cage the Elephant, but not intentionally. My Amazon Music is still screwing with me. Intentionally, I listened to U2 and Audioslave.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: