China

Keep On Truckin’


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When it comes to lies and spreading hate and division, goon TV keeps on truckin’.

If you’ve been watching Fox and the other channels your crazy uncle loves, you would have thought the brutal authoritarian regime bringing crackdowns upon its oppressed minority wasn’t China, but Canada.

Right-wing TV is upset that the Canadian “Freedom” Truckers are being denied their white privilege and entitlements to break the law. As we learned from the insurrection at the United States Capitol and the lawless rulebreaking Trump regime, conservatives care less about laws and more about who’s breaking them.

If you’re a white conservative, it’s OK if you protest. It’s OK if you attempt to overturn the government. It’s Ok to break into the Capitol and poop and pee-pee in the hallways. It’s Ok to bring nooses and try to hang the vice president. It’s OK to steal stuff. It’s Ok to attack cops. It’s OK to block roads. It’s OK to stop commerce. It’s OK to kill jobs. It’s OK to disrupt the supply chain of goods entering and leaving this country.

The same people upset over the Canadian government clearing the “Freedom” Truckers after being allowed to block roads around that nation’s parliament, and blockades of the border for weeks, were more than happy to see Donald Trump and William Barr clear a park of peaceful protesters so he could have his photo taken while holding a Bible upside down.

For conservatives, it’s wrong to protest for racial equality but good to protest fake attacks on their white freedom.

Remember when conservatives were the “law and order” party? Yeah, scratch that. Remember when they cared about cops? Scratch that too. Weren’t they complaining about the supply-chain crisis and blaming President Biden? Oops. Haven’t they also been complaining about the employment rate? Uh oh. Remember how they always claimed to be for a strong economy? Yeah, not so much.

These “Freedom” fu…er…truckers have been breaking the law. Several would-be terrorists were caught with weapons in a plot to murder the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. They’ve been disrupting the supply chain. Workers at auto plants have been told to go home because the goods they make were not able to be transported across our border with Canada. The truckers’ actions have hurt the economy in both nations.

Let’s not forget these “protests” were organized by white nationalists. Let’s not forget that these “Freedom” Truckers are not just the minority of Canadians, but they represent a minority of Canadian truckers. The trucking industry has condemned these protests. Of the 120,000 truckers Canadian truckers who serve cross-border routes, an estimated 85 percent are vaccinated. Let’s destroy the economy because 15 percent of Canadian truckers have full diapers.

This entire thing is supposedly about vaccine mandates. Canada and the U.S. both exempted truckers from being vaccinated to cross the border in order not to disrupt the supply chain. Those exemptions were lifted in January, and then all this bullshit started.

The truckers’ freedoms were never taken away. If you’re entering another nation, then you are expected to obey the laws in that nation. If you go to Mexico, you are expected to obey the laws of that nation. If you’re a citizen of the United States and Canada says you must be vaccinated against COVID to enter, Canada is not violating your rights. The same goes if you’re a Canadian and want to enter the U.S. You may as well protest against another country’s seatbelt and speed limit laws.

It really doesn’t make a lot of sense, which explains why the Fox fuckers are so in love with these butt-hurt truckers.

Music Note: I listened to The Black Keys and White Stripes while drawing today’s cartoon. I didn’t aim to listen to two-person bands. It’s just that after listening to the Keys, my automatic player went directly to the White Stripes, and I just let it keep going.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Medal in Treason


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Eileen Gu may be the best freestyle skier in the world. She was born in San Francisco to a Chinese mother and an American father. She’s been competing internationally since 2018, starting when she was still in high school. She dominates in big air, halfpipe, and slopestyle events. She’s favored to take several gold medals in this year’s Olympics…but not for the USA. What?

Although Ms. Gu is a born and raised American, she’s competing for China in this year’s winter Olympics. In fact, she already has one gold medal at this time. She competed for the United States during the 2018-2019 World Cup Season, then announced she’ll be competing for China henceforth.

She made this decision when she was 15, but I’m sure she didn’t make it on her own. She explained on Instagram, “The opportunity to help inspire millions of young people where my mom was born, during the 2022 Beijing Olympic Winter Games is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to help to promote the sport I love. Through skiing, I hope to unite people, promote common understanding, create communication, and forge friendships between nations.”

So she’s going to promote common understanding, friendships, and communication under the flag of an autocratic regime that presides over a surveillance state and has subjected Uyghurs in Xinjiang to what the U.S. and other nations have described as genocide. You can argue if she was competing for the U.S, then she’d be doing it for a nation with a long tragic history of racism. Hell, we have politicians trying to ban the teaching of our racist history. But, Eileen Gu was born in this nation. She should be on the same side of the U.S.A, and not competing against her home country. The same goes for Republicans

A lot of Republicans, and the goons on Fox News, are rooting for Russia over Ukraine. They are rooting for an autocratic state led by a tyrant over a democracy. Fox’s Tucker Carlson has been a cheerleader for Vladimir Putin and Russia. One of Putin’s demands is assurance that Ukraine is never allowed to join NATO. Senator Josh Hawley, the guy who famously gave that fistbump to white nationalist terrorists on January 6, sent a letter to Secretary of State Antony Blinken saying we should give in to Putin on that demand. Trump supporters are used to giving in to the demands of tyrants.

I don’t care if the only thing Putin is demanding from the west is a box of Triscuits. You don’t give in to the demand of tyrants. It didn’t work out that well for Neville Chamberlain or Czechoslovakia.

Tucker Carlson echos Putin’s talking points to the point that Russian news shows are running clips of his show. Tucker believes Putin is only securing his border, as we should with Mexico, while not mentioning that Putin has already invaded and seized parts of Ukraine. That would be like us securing our border with Mexico by invading and annexing the Mexican state of Chihuahua.

Carlson wonders why it’s disloyal to side with Russia over Ukraine. Carlson is wondering what’s so bad about siding with a nation where critics are thrown out of windows or poisoned…or poisoned while being thrown out of windows. What’s so bad about a nation where people are thrown into prison for failing to die from state poisoning? What’s so bad about a nation that imprisoned Pussy Riot for criticizing Putin? What’s so bad about a nation where it’s illegal to be an opposition candidate against Putin? What’s so bad about a nation that violates international agreements time and time again? What’s so bad about siding with the nation that has attacked U.S. elections and those of other western democratic nations?

There’s a crop of Trumplican congressional candidates taking their cues from Trump and Tucker. Will a Republican-controlled Congress be a Putin Congress?

Eileen Gu is not the first American to compete for another nation in the Olympics. Becky Hammon played basketball for Russia during the 2008 games, and she got a lot of flak for it. But Becky didn’t make Team U.S.A. And typically, those Americans who do play for other nations are only doing so because they weren’t good enough for Team U.S.A.

Eileen Gu says she’s American when she’s in America and Chinese when she’s in China. I think these disloyal Republicans are Russian bots when they’re in Russia and America. Becky Hammon played for Russia when her home country’s team didn’t want her. All the Trumps and Tuckers should join her because none of them is good enough for Team U.S.A. either.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Tough On Putin


CjonesRGB12142021President Joe Biden is promising to send more arms to Ukraine if Russia invades. That may sound tough, but it’s actually kinda weak. Why not send those arms now, before a Russian invasion? The Biden admninistration has prepared a $200 million military aid package for Ukraine, but they’re holding off on sending that package in favor of diplomacy. I don’t see why they can’t do both. 

When the United States tried to give military aid to Ukraine during the Trump administration, the president (sic) used it for extortion, wanting the president of Ukraine to make up some dirt on his chief political rival. Donald Trump he was impeached for his illegal manuevers and mob tactics.

We don’t know what’s included in the military aid package Biden has crafted, but Ukraine has asked for air defense systems, anti-ship missiles, more Javelin anti-tank missiles, electronic jamming gear, radar systems, ammunition, upgraded artillery munitions and medical supplies. But if Russia rolls into Ukraine, they can pretty much take it just like they did when they formed the Soviet Union.

While Ukraine and some members of Congress are demanding this $200 million military aid package to be sent to Ukraine now, the United States has already sent over $400 million military aid to Ukraine in 2021, with another $50 million in the pipeline. 

Biden had a Zoom conference call with Russian president Vladimir Putin earlier this week when he threatened harsh sanctions if they do invade Ukraine. Many expect those santions to include the Nordstrom 2, a gas pipeline from Russia to Europe, which a lot of our European allies are in favor of, especially Germany. 

What does Putin want with Ukraine anyway? It’s probably personal while also a distraction from Russia’s internal collection of crises. Putin views Ukraine and Russians as basically the same people and that the nation should be closer to Russia than to the west. But Ukraine, led by a pro-democracy president in Volodymyr Zelensky, wants closer ties to the United States, western Europe, and NATO. 

Putin annexed Crimea in 2014 and he may see the rest of Ukraine as unfinished business. If Putin invades Ukraine, he’ll do so while telling the world Ukraine attacked Russia. Putin has been spreading misinformation for years. Remember the 2016 election? You can bet Donald Trump will be eager to help Putin spread lies. When Putin re-wrote history and said Afghanistan invaded the Soviet Union in 1979, Donald Trump repeated the lie. Putin also has the support of anti-democratic Trump supporters in this nation. Trump supporters love Vladimir Putin and fascism. 

President Biden has also announced a diplomatic boycott of the 2022 Winter Olympics to beheld in Beijing. This boycott is over China’s human rights abuses of the Uighur Muslims in Xinjiang. This boycott means we’re not sending diplomats, but U.S. athletes will still participate. U.S. corporations that sponsor the Olympics will also continue to participate. While Biden’s critics say this is weak, China is pretty pissed off with one Chinese media pundit saying he hopes Biden lives to see a boycott of the Los Angeles Olympics. I guess they really wanted to meet Antony Blinken.

There are also concerns China may invade Taiwan. China views Taiwan the same way Putin sees Ukraine, as though it belongs to them. In fact, China doesn’t recognize Taiwan at all and officially views it as a part of its nation. U.S. policy has been weak with Taiwan for decades as it refuses to recognize it as a sovereign nation and it doesn’t have a seat in the United Nations (they did but China took it). Only 13 nations recognize Taiwan as an independent country. 

Is Biden being weak? What else can he do beyond promising military intervention? The one certainty in all of this is that the United States will not send forces to fight in Ukraine and Taiwan. 

Creative note: This cartoon isn’t one of my usual laugh-yourself-into-the-ground-knee-slapping-hee-hee-pee-yourself-funny cartoons, but I still wanted to do it. It’s been in my head for a few days and I was waiting for someone else to do it. Maybe someone else did think of it but thought it was a bad idea. This is too subtle for social media which means newspapers will probably love it.

Music note: While drawing today’s cartoon, I listened to some Nirvana, Better Than Ezra, and She Bites Dogs. I signed up for a free six-month trial of Apple Music today because I am that annoyed with Amazon Music and the way they just changed everything up. Since I just paid for this month, that gives me a month to go through my Amazon Music and add it to my Apple.
Also, She Bites Dogs is Dorian Cleveland’s band, my friend who just passed away. If you’re on Apple Music, add them and my band, Corporate T-Shirt.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Peng Shuai


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Peng Shuai is a Chinese professional tennis player. In 2014, she became the first Chinese tennis player to receive a number-one ranked doubles player by the World Tennis Association. In 2011, she was ranked 11 for singles play. As a doubles player, she’s won Wimbledon and the French Open. She got as far as the semi-finals as a singles player at the US Open. And now, she has accused the Chinese Vice Premier Zhang Gaoli of sexually assaulting her. Then, she disappeared.

China is an oppressive capitalist communist government that’s controlled by one man. Shuai posted the allegation on Weibo, a Chinese microblogging platform. Within minutes, the post had disappeared.

Beijing is hosting the Winter Olympics this year. In case you’re a Republican, Beijing is in China. They are now deflecting and suppressing all information over this to avoid a scandal before the Olympics. China is telling the world there’s nothing to see here, which works in China but not the world…except those who have corporate deals in China.

When western media asked about Peng’s whereabouts, the Chinese foreign ministry spokesman said, “I have not heard of the issue you raised. This is not a diplomatic question”. When a different spokesperson was asked at another press conference, he said the reporter should contact the “relevant department.” The editor of a government-owned and controlled tabloid, the Global Times, wrote, “As a person who is familiar with the Chinese system, I don’t believe Peng Shuai has received retaliation and repression speculated by foreign media for the thing people talked about”.

When CNN reported on the issue last night, its broadcast in China went to a test screen.

The chief executive of the WTA, Steve Simon, called upon the Chinese government to come clean and stop the censorship on the subject. The Chinese Tennis Association said Peng Shuai was just fine and everyone should take their word for it.

Fellow tennis players, Novak Djokovic, Billie Jean King, Serena Williams, Naomi Osaka, Andy Murray, Roger Federer, and Rafael Nadal have all expressed support for Peng Shuai and called for an end to censorship in China.

The Chinese state-run media released an email they claim was written by Peng Shuai stating she was at home, wasn’t missing, and her allegations were all lies. The government then released photos of her with her cat, stuffed animals, and attending a charity event. She was smiling in each photo. The Global Times editor posted on social media, “”Can any girl fake such sunny smile under pressure? Those who suspect Peng Shuai is under duress, how dark they must be inside. There must be many, many forced political performances in their countries.” In this country, only Republicans afraid of upsetting Donald Trump.

The Chinese government had Peng Shuai talk to the International Olympic Committee in a video call where she said she was “safe and well.” The IOC bought it.

The thing is, while the WTA, the ATP, and a bunch of tennis players continue to call this out, the IOC doesn’t want to upset China as it’s big money for them. Sponsors of the upcoming Olympics, as well as other sports leagues, don’t want to upset this communist revenue source. Sponsors of the 2022 Winter Olympics, Airbnb, Bridgestone, Coca-Cola, Procter & Gamble, Toyota, Visa, and many more, have all refused comment on the Peng Shuai situation. They know China would be willing to cut them off just like they cut of CNN and the Houston Rockers.

When Houston Rockets general manager Daryl Morey tweeted in support of pro-democracy protesters in Hong Kong in 2019, China shut off the airing of all Rockets games in that nation. The NBA went groveling to China, apologized, and had Morey apologize. China was able to bully an American on American soil.

And it was in America where the sexual assault of hundreds of gymnasts was covered up. The sexual assaults committed by Larry Nassar were covered up by USA Gymnastics, the US Olympic Committee, Michigan State, and even the FBI.

While China protected one man after an accusation by one female, the United States protected one man after accusations from 368 gymnasts. When China goes to cover up a sexual assault by one man, the United States said, “Me too.”

The #MeToo movement is trying to gain some traction in China, while it’s not 100 percent successful in the United States. The Chinese government is refusing to investigate Peng Shuai’s allegations just like the FBI took those from Simone Biles and others and shoved them in a desk drawer and closed it.

We are a much more open country than China. We have press freedom. We have more than one political party…for now. We have free elections…for now. But we know that if government agencies and other institutions can get away with suppressing sexual assault accusations, and oppressing women, they’ll do it.

We need to call for an end to China’s oppression…and that of the United States.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Less Learn-Learn for more Boom-Boom


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Fun fact you may take some enjoyment in: Today’s cartoon was drawn one block from K Street. In case you don’t know, K Street is home to most of the nation’s largest lobbying firms. There are more decisions made on K Street about how to spend your money than there are on Capitol Hill.

Another fun fact: I am now writing today’s blog in the underground food court at Union Station. A girl just walked by on the phone screaming that there are pigeons in the station. “Pigeons,” she said. “Pigeons. You know. Birds!” I don’t know what was going on there. There are always pigeons inside Union Station.

President Biden proposed $754 billion (with a “B”) in military spending for fiscal year 2022. The Senate appropriators, feeling horny for more blowy-uppy shit, have tacked on another $24 billion, which is a five percent increase. Did you actually believe we were going to reduce military spending after pulling out of Afghanistan? Pause for, “HAHAHAHAHAHA.” Even Democrats spend a lot on the military.

Jon Tester, the Democratic senator who chairs the Appropriations Committee said this budget, “strengthens our military and ensures the brave men and women that protect this country have the resources they need to keep Americans safe.” Yeah, yeah, yeah…support our troops…spend more money. What? You wanna reduce money for the defense department? Why do you hate our troops? Don’t you realize we need an increase in billions for missiles to be fired from drones at Muslim weddings, you communist?

And then, we got news last week that China has developed a brand new missile that does something bad. Oh no! Even worse, they might invade Taiwan! Good Lord! What will we do about that Chinese missile? Why, we’ll buy more missiles. Take that, Chinese missile fuckers. What will we do if they invade Taiwan? Absolutely nothing but increase budgets and wag fingers. Also, we’ll make sure our sneaker industry will survive the turmoil. It will? Well OK then. Carry on. Now, where are them Muslim weddings?

Republicans and other assorted idiots who don’t know things always bark about how we need to spend more on our military to keep up with the bad guys. But the thing is, kids…we’re not keeping up with anybody because we’re ahead. As for the bad guys, they can’t keep up with us because they don’t have the money and they’re not dumb enough to waste as much.

Remember when Mitt Romney was complaining about President Barack Obama allowing the military to rot away from inside itself? Yeah, we were spending over $500 billion on defense at that time. Then four years later a big orange ass clown came along and said the same bullshit even though were were now spending over $600 billion on defense. About two days after the orange ass clown entered the Oval Office, he claimed he had already rebuilt our nuclear stockpile. During the 2020 Republican convention, one of his idiot ass head kids (I think it was Eric) claimed his father had given us new aircraft carriers…plural. In case you’re a Republican, “plural” means more than one. In case you’re Eric Trump, no, your daddy didn’t give us any new aircraft carriers. Not one, not two, not three…nada. None. Zilcho. No new boats from daddy.

Here is another fun fact: The United States spends more on its military than the next top ten spenders put together. Another fun fact is eight of those spenders are our allies, unless France really gets more upset over us swiping a nuclear submarine deal with Australia from them than we orignally thought.

The Pentagon argues we need to spend more than other nations, as if we’re barely keeping up while we hundreds of billions ahead. And they love when Russia and China increase their budgets, even a little, because that gives them another reason to yell for more, like a pigeon being given bread crumb from a Jersey Mike’s sub in Union Station’s food court.

Speaking of aircraft carriers, the two enemies on that list, China and Russia, only have about three aircraft carriers between them…and they’re shitty aircraft carriers. As for us, we have almost as many aircraft carriers as Donald Trump has sexual assault allegations. Yeah, we have over 20 of those ships. But enough about boats, what are we losing?

We’re losing free community college. Now keep in mind this five percent, equallying $24 billion, is for one year. Biden’s plan for free college cost $45.5 billion….over five years. So, we’re losing free college which over five years was under ten percent of the military’s budget for one years. As President Biden might say, “C’mon, man.”

This nation needs more education. Have you watched Fox News? Yeah, we need to teach more Americans more stuff, like facts. It’s good to know things…actual things and not conspiracy theories, like Dr. Anthony Fauci is training Wuhan bats to bite Americans and given them COVID. I just made that one up but you have to admit, it’s pretty good. The truth is, he’s been training these pigeons on how to get indoors and beg for food scraps. Seriously? Where are the doors down here? How’d these birds get here?

At this rate, I’m not optimistic. About the budget, not pigeons. I don’t believe that even if the Democrats controlled the White Houes and Congress by large margins that we’d ever take money away from the defense industry and do some actual good stuff our nation needs, like free college, child care, job training, road, pre-natal care, and pigeon-free train stations.

I mean, seriously, no free college but we’re about to give Space Force $17 billion for for 2022. Another $17 billion for Space Force and they haven’t even been to space yet, but William Shatner has. We could probably give Shatner a quarter of that, he’d go back to space, date a green woman, and come back and solve our train-station pigeon crisis. Space Force hasn’t done shat.

This blog is done. I have to catch a train and I can’t concentrate while someone’s standing next to me talking into an invisible phone about why Bojangles Chicken isn’t in here anymore. Obviously, this person has a mental condition but I too want to know why no more Bojangles.

Anyway, to sum up, cut back on missile production, the only new aircraft carriers should be the ones Eric’s imagining, and we need free two-year college education.

If anything, we need to spend less in the capital on military bullshit and more in the capital on these indoor pigeons. I nearly lost a taco.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. A new shipment will arrive in early November. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

Watch me draw:

Ask China


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OK. I’ll bite. Hey, China. Why is Donald Trump such a racist?

During yesterday’s shitshow disguised as a press conference, Trump deflected from his agenda of boasting about himself and lying about the “success story” that is his response to the coronavirus, to once again demonstrate to the nation that he is a huge racist.

I have been wondering for the past month while Donald Trump keeps comparing our nation’s testing with that of other nations. I question this like I question why everyone in his administration has to say, “Thank you for your leadership.” I also ask myself, “Is that how someone stands while wearing lifts and an adult diaper?” But The competition question came back to me yesterday as the entire conference was about comparing the United States’ numbers with those of other countries (of course, there were lies about those). I’m very happy to report that I’m not alone in asking this question. A reporter for CBS asked the question.

A White House correspondent for CBS News asked Donald Trump, “Why is this a global competition when, every day, Americans are still losing their lives?”

Trump responded to the White House correspondent with, “They’re losing their lives everywhere in the world, and maybe that’s a question you should ask China. Don’t ask me, ask China that question, OK.”

Of course, Trump had to overemphasize and do that slight pause he habitually does before giving a hard pronunciation to “China.” “And maybe that’s a question you should ask…CHINA.”

Have you ever wanted to visit…CHINA? Do you know anyone from…CHINA? One of my best friends took his mom to…CHINA. Did you know the president of….CHINA…is named…XI?

If you figure out what Donald Trump’s tick is with…CHINA, let me know. But, we’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to talk about his racism, like when he keeps reminding us the coronavirus came from…CHINA.

When Donald Trump told the reporter to “ask…CHINA,” was he being a bully? Was he being sexist because the reporter is a female? Or…wait for it…was he being racist?

Was he being racist in asking the correspondent to ask…CHINA? What does China have to do with Donald Trump making it a global competition? Why should anyone ask China or any nation why Donald Trump keeps comparing our numbers to other nations…yesterday it was mostly South Korea and Germany. Hey, China…why does Donald Trump keep comparing the U.S. testing numbers with those of South Korea and Germany? It doesn’t make much sense to ask China, does it?

Oh, I get it. It does make sense in a very stupid sort of way if you’re a racist. See, I forgot to mention something. The reporter Donald Trump told to “ask China” about why he thinks it’s a global competition is…wait for it…a Chinese American. He asked her to ask China as if she has China on speed dial. Was someone in China to interrupt their dinner with, “Excuse me while I put down my egg roll and chopsticks and take this call. It’s from Weijia. My fortune cookie told me she’d call today.” Fun fact: Egg rolls and fortune cookies were invented in the United States…just like most Chinese food you order in an American restaurant. And while racism wasn’t invented in the United States or even by white people, white people like Donald Trump have perfected it.

Weijia Jiang is a White House correspondent for CBS News. She was born in Xiamen, China, and raised in West Virginia. If you’re going to stereotype her, she probably listens to bluegrass and says phrases like, “Up around the holler.” She attended the University of William and Mary and Syracuse University. Another fun fact about Jiang is…she doesn’t take much shit.

After Donald Trump told her, a Chinese-American, to ask…CHINA, she asked, “Sir, why are you saying that to me specifically?” Donald Trump, got upset, not because he doesn’t know the word “specifically,” but because she asked him a “nasty” question.

That’s another tick of his. Trump insults men too. He goes off on male reporters from time to time, but he’s extra hard on female reporters. He once goaded a crowd to harass MSNBC’s Katy Tur at one of his hate rallies to the point she needed police protection to leaver the building. But he especially goes hard on female reporters who aren’t white. And when he’s upset by women, he uses the term “nasty.” He used it against Hillary Clinton, Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris, Carmen Cruz, Mazie Hirono, Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex, the Prime Minister of Denmark when she wouldn’t sell him Greenland, and he used it yesterday on Weijia Jiang.

And after his testy exchange with Jiang, Donald Trump ran away like a little coward.

The people who believe Donald Trump is not a racist are the same jerks who thinks he’s a tough guy while running away from a woman’s question.

Yesterday’s exchange was reminiscent of the time he told White House correspondent April Ryan to gather together the Congressional Black Caucus and set up a meeting with Trump. April Ryan works for American Urban Radio Networks. She’s black. Donald Trump thinks all black people know each other. Maybe she can ask Colin Kaepernick to stop kneeling. Maybe April Ryan can tell Dwane Johnson we’ve had enough Fast & Furious movies. Maybe she can tell Lebron James and Stephen Curry to stop saying “nasty” thing about Trump. Maybe April can tell Samuel L. Jackson to stop saying “motherfucker” all the time like, “that’s one racist motherfucker.” She must know all of them because each of them is black, right? Racist motherfucker Donald Trump thinks so.

But since we’re now going to ask…CHINA questions that don’t have anything to do with them, let’s ask them this:

Hey….CHINA. Why is racism not a dealbreaker for Trump supporters?

I don’t know about…China, but Sam will probably tell us, “Because they’re all racist motherfuckers.”

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

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Trump, Tropes, And Trots


cjones03232020

Yesterday, I had a Trump supporter tell me to “stop playing the blame game” and stop blaming “President” (sic) Trump. Three days ago, this idiot posted on Facebook that the coronavirus pandemic is a conspiracy. I get asked occasionally, “Why don’t you unfriend these hateful and stupid people?” Because I want to know the latest arguments and talking points they’re using. I want to know the daily outrage.

Usually, the daily outrage is “Obama, Obama, Obama.” Others over the past few months have been Hillary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer, Adam Schiff, Alexandria Ocasio Cortez, the Superbowl halftime show, the “media,” and invisible things that persecute Trump cultists. It’s kinda crept up slowly, but now the outrage is China.

It’s often debated, is Fox News leading Trump or is Trump leading Fox News? It’s both. This time, it’s Fox News giving the talking point to Donald Trump. This time, it’s the “China virus.”

Fox News anchors have been calling the coronavirus the “Chinese virus” and the “Wuhan virus.” Why? because it’s a racist trope that caters to the racist base that makes up their viewership and it deflects blame from Donald Trump.

Now, Trump is using the term “Chinese virus.” He said it’s “not racist at all” and in explaining why he uses it, he said, “It comes from China. That’s why.” He also said he was trying to combat a disinformation campaign by China that the virus was started by the U.S. military. He said, “I didn’t appreciate the fact that China was saying that our military gave it to them. I think saying that our military gave it to them creates a stigma.”

It’s true that China has started a propaganda campaign placing blame on the United States. It’s also true that Trump and his team are waging a disinformation and hate campaign in return. The Secretary of State has referred to it as the “Wuhan virus” at least six times. The Trump campaign said on its website, “America is under attack — not just by an invisible virus, but by the Chinese.” That creates a stigma.

Kellyanne Conway said Donald Trump was trying to be “accurate” and, “I think what the president is saying is that is where it was first started.” Republican fucknut Senator Charles Grassley tweeted, “I don’t understand why China gets upset bc we refer to the virus that originated there the ‘Chinese virus’ Spain never got upset when we referred to the Spanish flu in 1918&1919.” No one is sure where the Spanish Flu originated, with many saying Spain, China, Austria, a UK military camp in France, and…Kansas. It flared up during World War I with most signs pointing at the world’s militaries of being the cause and carriers. It got the name “Spanish Flu” because Spain was neutral and the allies agreed to give them the name, thus removing blame from themselves. Maybe by blaming Spain with the name (and we were recently in a war with them), there wouldn’t be any resistance from the European nations we were at war with who were also fighting the pandemic. Anyway, Charles Grassley is an idiot.

It’s not just hateful to blame the government of China for the virus. It’s also hateful to people of Chinese descent. Hell, even people descended from other Asian nations are being blamed. There have been reports of attacks and slurs cast at Asian-Americans. Even Trump-supporting white people married to Asians are confused by which Asians to blame.

CBS News reporter Weijia Jiang tweeted, “This morning a White House official referred to #Coronavirus as the ‘Kung-Flu’ to my face.” Kellyanne demanded the reporter to tell her who said it, thus demanding a reporter to reveal her sources. While Kellyanne said it was wrong to say “Kung Flu,” she defended Donald Trump’s use of “Chinese virus.”

Kellyanne pulled out her imaginary Get-Out-Of-Racism-Free card by pointing out she’s married to an Asian, as George Conway is half-Filipino. That was weird. She’s married to the guy and doesn’t seem to understand Filipino is not Chinese. That’s like saying I can’t be prejudiced against Germans because I have English ancestry. We’re white so we all look alike, right? Is that what Kellyanne was trying to say about her husband and children?

Also, like Europeans can hate other Europeans and Muslim nations hate other Muslim nations, there are Asians who hate Asians. Go to China or Korea (either one) and ask them how they feel about the Japanese. No race is monolithic. You’d think someone married to someone of a different race would understand that. But, if George hasn’t convinced Kellyanne that Donald Trump is a racist grifting conman with brain worms, he’s probably not going to be able to convince her Filipinos and Chinese aren’t the same.

China bungled their response to the pandemic. Donald Trump did too. But neither gave us the virus. Both are guilty of making it worse. It would be best for our government not to respond to a hateful propaganda campaign from a communist nation with its own hateful propaganda campaign.

Blaming China takes the heat off Trump. It puts a face on the virus. It’s catering to the hate in Donald Trump’s base, which is what Trump and Fox News does best.

The universally recognized terms are “coronavirus” and “covid19.” Calling it anything with an Asian connotation is a distraction and entirely political. Anyone doing so has an agenda, and it’s a hateful agenda. It’s not about accuracy.

Donald Trump is now referring to himself as a “wartime president.” I found it scary enough when he referred to himself just as “president.” During an actual war, President Franklin Roosevelt responded with racism when he put over 120,000 Japanese-Americans in internment camps…just because they were Japanese. If a good president like Roosevelt can do something so hateful and prejudiced, what will a bad, racist, hateful president like Donald Trump do, even if his war is pretend?

Presidents are supposed to bring people together, especially during a crisis. Being presidential is not Donald Trump’s specialty. Solving a crisis isn’t his specialty either. Hate is Donald Trump’s specialty. Division is his specialty.

The virus isn’t prejudiced, racist, or partisan. It doesn’t have yellow, black, brown, or white skin. It doesn’t care about your tax bracket. Tax cuts will not kill the pandemic. Neither will Donald Trump’s hate and racism.

Racism is a virus and a plague…just like Donald Trump.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

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Chinese Dribbling


cjones10122019

CCTV Sports, a division of China’s state broadcaster, said in a statement, “We believe any remarks that challenge national sovereignty and social stability do not belong to the category of free speech.”

Let that be a reminder that any nation that has prohibitions on speech doesn’t know the definition of free speech (it’s kinda like when Donald Trump lectures about…anything). For the speech to be free, all subjects fit the category, even those that scare you.

China loves basketball and the nation accounts for ten percent, and growing, of the National Basketball Association’s revenue. That revenue is now threatened after a tweet by one of the league’s general managers. Houston Rockets’ GM, Daryl Morey, sent out a tweet in support of pro-democracy protesters in Hong Kong. He tweeted, “Fight for freedom, stand with Hong Kong.” Authoritarian China was not pleased.

Chinese organizations and firms have suspended their relationship with the NBA, at least for the time being. Authorities made it clear that business as usual with the league will cease until the NBA totally repudiates Morey’s statement. They haven’t done that.

The tweet was deleted and the NBA issued a statement that was criticized for being too beholden to communist China. Since then, Commissioner Adam Silver defended Morey’s right to free speech saying the league would not pursue profits over principles. Silver said, “The NBA will not put itself in a position of regulating what players, employees, and team owners say or will not say.”

Where the NFL is afraid of Donald Trump and conservative America, the NBA is not and has set itself apart for standing up for social justice and against bullies like Trump. After Trump attacked NFL players for kneeling during the national anthem, the league changed policies to avoid the controversy, even going so far to hide the players in the locker room while the anthem is played.

After Trump attacked players who said they wouldn’t visit the White House by telling them they’re not welcome at the White House (in case you’ve forgotten, Donald Trump is a toddler), the players were supported by the commissioner and several team owners. Lebron James called Trump a “bum,” and was joined by other prominent players. While Trump continued to berate the NFL, calling for protesting players to be fired, like a bully, he slunk away from the NBA. In the NFL, Colin Kaepernick can’t even get a try out let alone a job.

NBA players have led on-court protests while wearing T-shirts in support of Black Lives Matter. When Arizona enacted a Gestapo-like law making it legal for cops to stop people for merely being brown, the Phoenix Suns wore “Los Suns” jerseys to support their Latino community and fan base. When racist comments from L.A. Clippers owner Donald Sterling emerged, the league banned him for life. The league has set a standard for itself. While kowtowing to China may save some revenue, not standing up for its players and employees would hurt it with its American fan base.

China has responded by canceling broadcasts of the two exhibition games between the L.A. Lakers and the Brooklyn Nets that are to be held tomorrow in Shanghai and Saturday in Shenzhen. Now, the actual games may be canceled also. The NBA’s exclusive partner in China, Tencent Sports, said it would suspend live streaming for Houston Rockets games, and stop reporting news about the team. That’s pretty big because the Rockets are the NBA’s most popular team in China, thanks to Yao Ming. Nearly 500 million people in China watched NBA programming on Tencent platforms last season.

Hopefully, the NBA continues to stand up to China. Bullies shouldn’t be tolerated and allowed to win when they threaten financial pressure. Some people in this country should learn that.

While Morey was tweeting “Fight for freedom, stand with Hong Kong,” our president (sic) sent a congratulatory tweet to China on 70 years of communist rule. He also congratulated Vladimir Putin on winning a sham election after being coached by his staff, “do not congratulate.” It’s been reported that Donald Trump promised President Xi Jinping that he’d stay silent on Hong Kong protests while our two countries negotiated an end to the trade war he started. Trump says that’s not true, but he also said only dumb people would believe he talked to Ukraine about investigating the Bidens before a summary of the transcript came out proving he talked to Ukraine about investigating the Bidens…and then admitted it. Of course, while denying he promised not to criticize China over Hong Kong, he still hasn’t criticized China over Hong Kong. In fact, the guy who broadcasts his opinions from the mayor of London to Emmy ratings hasn’t shared one comment on the NBA/China rift.

Hysterically, the Trump Campaign is currently airing commercials about how it takes a “tough guy” to change Washington. This is the same “tough guy” who was too cowardly to bring up Otto Warmbier to Kim Jong Un’s face or to take our intelligence agencies’ side over Putin’s while standing next to the Russian dictator.

Silver said, “I do know there are consequences from freedom of speech; we will have to live with those consequences.” In case you’re a Republican, what Silver is practicing is called “ethics.”

Donald Trump is not a friend of free speech. He calls the free press “enemy of the American people” and has suggested we change laws, against our Constitution, that will allow punishing the press for reporting negatively about him. He’s not a friend of democracy. He’s tried to reward Putin and Russia by getting them back into the G7, from which they were expelled after invading a democratic American ally. He worked to steal one election, by asking a foreign nation to meddle, and he’s doing it again to steal a second.

I stand with Hong Kong. Anyone who favors democracy over authoritarianism, including the president of the United States, should stand with Hong Kong. Our president (sic) could stand to learn about principles, ethics, freedom of speech, social justice, and democracy from a bunch of basketball players.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

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Watch me draw.

 

North Korean Thong Attack


cjones10082019

Carrie Cordero, a former Justice Department and intelligence official who’s served in Republican and Democratic administrations asked the question in a PBS interview that we all need to ask.

Cordero said, “The problem has to do with whether or not he is in violation of the Constitution and of the constitutional principles of whether or not he is fulfilling the oath of office, whether or not he is abusing his constitutional authorities to conduct foreign affairs by using that access to foreign leaders to basically work in his own personal interest.”

Her question is: Is the president (sic), when he’s conducting foreign affairs, acting in the United States’ interests, or is he using that position to work in the benefit of his own personal political ambitions?

Many Trump supporters say our president should root out corruption in nations that are receiving financial aid from the United States. That’s a fair point and it’s one previous administrations have done. In fact, it’s what the Obama administration was doing when Joe Biden pressed Ukraine to get rid of a prosecutor, who was NOT investigating his son. But, why is Joe Biden, who has not been accused of doing anything illegal the focus of Trump’s pursuit of rooting out corruption in foreign nations?

Some Trump supporters argue that Joe Biden was not a candidate when Trump was asking other nations to investigate him, so that means he wasn’t a political opponent at the time. But as reported yesterday, Trump brought up Biden’s presidential prospects to China’s president Xi Jinping last June. Biden announced his presidential campaign last April. In case you’re a Republican, April comes before June. Even before Biden announced his campaign, Trump was tweeting attacks at Biden and mentioning his potential campaign. Donald Trump viewed Biden as a political opponent.

Hunter Biden is accused of leveraging his name and father’s position as vice-president to make money off foreign nations, specifically Ukraine and China. But, that’s not illegal. Even if it was illegal, it probably wouldn’t stop Trump and his children from doing the exact same thing.

Since January 2017, Eric and Don Jr. have sold more than $100 million of the family’s real estate, according to Forbes. That includes a $3.2 million deal in the Dominican Republic, despite their daddy’s pledge not to do any new foreign deals while in office. Yes, he promised that. That also hasn’t stopped the Trumps from making $41 million last year from their Washington hotel, which foreign money is pouring into on a daily basis. It hasn’t stopped them from engaging in a $1.7 billion Trump project in Indonesia which received a $500 billion infusion from a state-owned Chinese construction company. It hasn’t stopped Jared Kushner, Trump’s son-in-law, of getting a massive cash infusion from Qatar. That hasn’t stopped Ivanka from receiving trademarks for her brands in China. Yet, let’s investigate Hunter Biden.

When Eric and Don Jr. aren’t making money off the presidency in foreign countries, they like to spend their spare time attacking Hunter Biden for making money in foreign countries.

Back to the question, is Trump using the presidency to advance the nation’s interests when he talks to foreign leaders, or his own? According to new reports, Trump has asked Australia to help discredit the Mueller investigation. According to the Times of London, just two days after Boris Johnson became prime minister, Trump called him seeking help to discredit the Mueller investigation. That was just one day after his call to Ukraine where he asked that nation’s president to investigate Joe Biden. Last week, Attorney General William Barr flew to Italy to pressure that nation to help discredit the Mueller investigation. Yesterday, Trump publicly called for China to investigate Joe and Hunter Biden.

The impeachment inquiry began because of Trump asking a foreign nation to help his campaign. That’s exactly what Trump did publicly yesterday. Remember that “no collusion” line? It’s the same thing he did during the 2016 campaign when he asked Russia if they were listening, to help his campaign. Later that day, they proved they were listening and started hacking Democrats.

Trump withheld foreign aid from Ukraine that was approved by a majority in both houses of Congress until that nation’s president told Trump he’d help with investigating the Bidens. If all these dealings are for the nation’s interests and not his, then why is Trump sending his personal goon/attorney, Rudy Giuliani, to harass Ukraine instead of it being an initiative of the State Department? Why did he remove the ambassador of Ukraine, a staunch advocate of ridding corruption in Ukraine, after Giuliani complained about her?

Is Trump abusing his power by threatening the whistleblower and those who helped him? Is he abusing his power by insinuating they should receive the death penalty for exposing his corruption?

Russia helped Donald Trump win the presidency. Since then, he’s forgiven them for invading Ukraine and has argued they should be allowed to rejoin the G7. He’s taken Vladimir Putin’s word over his own intelligence agencies about Russia meddling in our elections. He’s pulled us out of a nuclear treaty with Russia. He’s destroyed notes of his meetings his Putin. On top of all that, he refuses to say one negative word about the Russian president. What will China receive for digging up dirt on the Bidens? Will it end the trade war?

Yesterday, it was revealed that text messages between top diplomats and a representative for Ukraine’s government were discussions that a high profile visit for Ukraine’s president to Washington was contingent on that nation investigating Burisma, the gas company whose board Hunter Biden served on, and an investigation to prop up the conspiracy that Ukraine, not Russia, meddled in the 2016 election to help Hillary Clinton.

The diplomats, Special Envoy Kurt Volker, William “Bill” Taylor, the charge d’affaires at the U.S. Embassy in Ukraine, and Gordon Sondland, the U.S. ambassador to the European Union, were the diplomats trying to get Ukraine to announce an investigation before they would receive a date on a visit to D.C. After aid to Ukraine was withheld, Taylor sent a message stating, “As I said on the phone, I think it’s crazy to withhold security assistance for help with a political campaign.” At that point, Sondland messaged, “I suggest we stop the back and forth by text.”

Taylor also wrote at one point, “Are we now saying that security assistance and WH meeting are conditioned on investigations?” From the messages, yes, it was.

This abuse of power, trading U.S. security for political favors with foreign leaders, threatening whistleblowers, and Trump’s daily corruption is OK with his cult. For them, they would be fine if Trump shot someone on 5th Avenue. But what about the rest of us?

We’ve become desensitized to Trump’s emolument violations, his sexual assaults, his vulgarity, his lies, his stupidity, his greed, and his narcissism. We kinda stopped demanding to see his taxes. But if enough time passes, will we become inoculated to this? Will we not care anymore? After Christmas, will we struggle to remember why there’s an impeachment inquiry? This is the very definition of corruption and Trump is flagrantly waving it around, daring the nation to remove him. This is a man who believes he’s above the law. These acts of corruption are enough to make Richard Nixon say, “Damn.” Seriously, we should have thrown the guy out when he suggested hosting the G7 at one of his crappy resorts.

Republicans will try to distract us at some point, but I’m not going to let it go. I hope you don’t either. Trump cultists may not deserve better but we do.

In response to Carrie Cordero’s question; Yes, Donald Trump is abusing his office and using his position for political (and financial) gain. My question is: Are we going to let him get away with it?

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

China Called


cjones09032019

Donald Trump said, “China called.” Did they, Donald? Did they really call right when you needed a face-saving measure after saying you had regrets about starting a trade war with them? Sure they did. How convenient was that?

In the past, if Presidents Nixon, Ford, Carter, Reagan, Bush, Clinton, the second Bush, or Obama said, “China called,” you’d be like, “what’d they say”? With Trump, you’re like, “Did they?” At this rate, the current president of the United States has less credibility than the president of the Hair Club for Men because A.) the Hair Club guy’s claims are more believable than any of Trump’s claims and B.) his hair looks better.

That’s the current state we’re in. We can’t trust even the most minuscule comments from the president of the United States. Even his most innocuous (if you’re a Republican, “innocuous” means not important) statements and claims can’t be trusted unless they’re backed with video proof and witnesses who don’t work for him. Why? We don’t even have to go that far back for examples. Let’s just use some from last weekend’s G7 summit.

Our first example comes from Trump admitting to a reporter that he had regrets over the trade war with China. Later, the White House tried to clean it up by saying he regretted not raising the tariffs higher. That would be like after sticking your penis into a beehive, regretting there weren’t more bees.

Our second example is from Trump skipping the climate meeting before the close of the G7. Stephanie Grisham, the new and improved HuckaSans who at least doesn’t appear to have applied her makeup with a paint blaster, said he skipped the meeting because he had scheduled bilateral talks with Germany and India. When asked about the meeting, Trump said, “We’re having it in a little while,” after it had already happened. To make matters worse, photos of the meeting emerged that showed German Chancellor Angela Merkel and Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi at the meeting along with Trump’s empty chair. Not only did Trump lie, but his representatives, who work for the United States of America, lied. So where was Trump? He was probably having “executive time” to see how much praise he was receiving from the Fox News propaganda machine. Or, maybe he was busy not being on the phone not talking to China.

Example number three: Trump claimed Putin outsmarted President Obama, which is why the Russian leader was kicked out of the G7. Nope and nope. He did not outsmart Obama in taking Crimea from Ukraine. Fact: If you’re a Republican, Crimea is a part of Ukraine, not the United States. Putin did not take Crimea from President Obama. Another fact: President Obama did not kick Putin out. The rest of the G7 kicked Putin out. In case you’re a Republican, President Obama was not President of the G7. But, it is true that world leaders like President Obama more than they like Donald Trump so he probably does have more influence. One reason they probably like President Obama more than they like Donald Trump is that President Obama never lied about stupid shit that was easily proven false, like…

Example number four. Donald Trump claimed Melania was chummy with Kim Jong Un. Trump said, “The first lady has gotten to know Kim Jong Un, and I think she would agree with me he is a man with a country (true) that has tremendous potential.” As it turns out, she was not present for any of Trump’s three love fests with Kim and there is no evidence she has ever spoken to him. And, if she had, I seriously doubt she speaks Korean. Sure, there are translators but how well can you know a person after three interpreted conversations? The new and improved HuckaSans swooped in to save the day and scoff at the press with, “President (sic) Trump confides in his wife (when they’re not in their separate bedrooms) on many issues including the detailed elements of his strong relationship with Chairman (sic) Kim.”

Based on that logic, I met Arnold Schwarzenneger once. He said hi. I said hi back. He’s short, even with the cowboy boots he was wearing. We took a picture. Now, you know Arnold Schwarzenneger too. Though in all honesty, he’s never written me a beautiful love letter, or any love letters.

If anything, the only world leader Melania has any desires to get chummy with is Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau. I hear she’s learning to speak Canadian.

Lie five: Trump said we gave Iran $150 billion. The fact is, it’s closer to $56 billion and we didn’t give it to them. It was their money that had been frozen in the United States.

Lie six: Trump said the Iran deal (that he pulled us out of) is “almost expiring if you think about it.” Trump should stop trying to think. Some provisions of the deal were written to expire in the next 10 to 15 years, but the deal as a whole was written to continue in perpetuity (if you’re a Republican, “perpetuity” means forever like).

Lie seven: Trump said “we’ve been losing $180 billion a year for many years” in our trade deficit with the European Union. It has not been at one consistent number for “many” years. It was $114 billion in 2018, $101 in 2017, and $93 billion in 2016.

Lie eight: Trump said China had been “taking” $500 billion from the U.S. for “many, many years” and “every single year.” That was just in case “many, many” don’t cover “every single.” The truth here is, China does not “take” money from the U.S, which most economists reject. The trade deficit with China has NEVER been $500 billion. Never.

Lie nine: Trump said, “We have billions and billions coming in” and “The United States which has never collected 10 cents from China, will in a fairly short period of time be over $100 billion in tariffs.” We’ve had tariffs on China for more than two centuries, so yeah…we’ve taken more than 10 cents from China. Americans make the tariff payments, not China.

Lie ten: Trump claimed Asian-American unemployment is at the lowest rate ever. Actually, the rate last July is higher than it was in President Obama’s last month.

Lie eleven: Trump claimed we’re not the top energy producer in the world and said, “I’ve made that wealth come alive.” Uh, I know he hates hearing the name “Obama,” but we became the top energy producer in the world in 2012. In case you’re a Republican, the man in the Oval Office during in 2012 was…wait for it…President Obama.

Lie twelve: Trump claimed he’s done “environmental impact statements.” The only environmental statement he’s ever made was that climate change is a hoax created by China.

Lie thirteen (I’m getting a cramp): Trump claimed his property, Doonbeg in Ireland (not to be confused with “Douchebag”), is part of the United Kingdom. In case you’re a Republican or Donald Trump, Ireland is NOT a part of the United Kingdom.

Lie fourteen: Trump claimed being president will cost him between three to five billion dollars. We haven’t seen his taxes but Forbes estimates his wealth at three billion and his claim of losing that much money “absurd.” Trump is trying to get our pity so he can grift the entire G7 next year by hosting it at one of his shitty golf resorts in Florida with the excuse “it’s near an airport.” It’s also near a McDonald’s which I’m afraid will be a major contributing factor.

Lie fifteen: Trump said he never asked about dropping nuclear bombs into hurricanes. Here’s the fact: Trump lies. If it leaks out of the White House that he said something stupid, moronic, idiotic, and oftentimes, racist, and then he denies ever saying it, it means he said it. What will happen is this; he denied it. His supporters will support his denial and tell the press he’d never say something so idiotic. Then, Trump will mistakenly admit he said it and try to explain how it makes sense. Then, his supporters will say he was only joking before coming back to, “Yeah, that makes sense. He’s a genius. I hate Mexicans.”

As for that phone call, Labor Secretary Steve Baby Fishmouth Mnuchin danced around whether there had been any actual phone calls. When asked, China’s Foreign Ministry said, “we called who now?”

Basically, if Trump wasn’t lying about the phone call then it would be the only thing he said that was true during his entire G7 adventure. Next time, can we send the Hair Club guy?

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.