Blackface

The Orangeface Blues


cjones02172019

In Quentin Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds, Brad Pitt’s Aldo Raine leads a team of Jewish Allied soldiers killing and scalping Nazis behind enemy lines in World War II. Of course, the soldiers’ actions go against everything in the Geneva Convention as Aldo says at one point in the film to a German soldier, “You probably heard we ain’t in the prisoner-takin’ business; we in the killin’ Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'”.

However, with each massacre, the Allied soldiers leave one survivor to tell the grisly tale and help build the Basterds “inglourious” reputation. In doing so, Also leaves the surviving soldier with a memento. A memento in the form of a permanent Swastika.

Before letting one survivor go in the film, he asks if he’s going to take off his uniform. Of course the German says yes and even swears he’s going to burn it. Aldo doesn’t like that answer and replies, “You see, we like our Nazis in uniform. That way we can spot ’em just like that. But you take off that uniform, ain’t no one ever gonna know you were a Nazi. And that don’t sit well with us. So, I’m gonna give you a little something you can’t take off.”

What Aldo does is take a huge hunting knife and carves a Swastika on the German’s forehead for him to wear the rest of his life. The men in his platoon compliment that his Swastikas keep getting better and better.

Taking off the uniform is exactly what Trump supporters are going to do after he’s going to prison and the nation spends decades recovering from his fuckery. They’re going to claim they never supported him. Have you seen Omarosa Manigault on TV? She hates everything about Trump now that he’s done with her, but she’d still be working in the White House if he would have her. She took off the uniform.

The liars of the future are the liars of the present. They don’t just include the general public. They also include elected officials. Ted Cruz and Lindsey Graham were two of the most anti-Trump Republicans in 2015 and 2016. They warned how he would destroy the nation. Cruz called him a “sniveling coward” for picking on his wife and father. Trump called Heidi ugly in a tweet and helped the National Enquirer spread a story that Ted’s dad was a part of the plot to kill JFK. Lindsey Graham said, “You know how you make America great again? Tell Donald Trump to go to hell.” Today, they’re both slobbering man servants to Trump. Lindsey Graham is helping Trump turn America into Hell.

Cruz and Graham don’t have a spine or an ounce of dignity between them, or the National Enquirer really has some good shit on them.

I know private citizens who were the same way. They swore they’d never support Trump. One conservative cartoonist even swore he’d stop sharing Breitbart links after they started supporting Trump, and right in line with a conservative’s convictions, he was true to his word for maybe three days. Today, how dare anyone criticize Trump.

All of these people are hypocrites. When the elected lickspittles decry Trump, we’ll have a public record of their groveling. But what about the private Trump brownnoser? Just like it pisses me off when someone accuses me of not being a Cubs fan until they won the World Series, it’s going to make me livid if they think I ever supported Donald Trump. How will we be able to tell the lying toadies apart from those of us who genuinely fought for our nation to protect it from Trump? It’s not like we can go around today and start carving Trump Swastikas into their foreheads. I checked.

We have to carve it into our memories. It’s easy enough with family members. It’ll be harder with friends and even tougher with casual acquaintances. But just as much as we can’t let them get away with lies today, we can’t let them do it in the future. And keep in mind, even when they do come around, they’re still the type of people who will put a psychopathic traitor before their nation. They’re still going to be racist assholes.

Just like Ralph Northam’s blackface yearbook photo came back to haunt him, we have to let their orangeface history haunt Trump’s sycophants.

For the Deplorable Basterds, we have to make orangeface really hard to wash off.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch the video.

Advertisements

Ugly Sweater Day


cjones02152019

It’s getting harder and harder to create satire when reality gives us an orange face president, blackface governors, and blackface sweaters. Seriously.

Gucci, a swanky and snooty overpriced fashion company released a turtleneck black wool balaclava sweater that resembled…I’m not making this shit up…blackface. If you’re like me, your first question is, what the hell is “balaclava?” The second question is, how was there not one person at Gucci that didn’t say “stop” at some point in the process of creating a blackface sweater?

You don’t need the Virginia blackface controversy to know how racist and insensitive society finds blackface. Gucci is now figuring that out as there have been calls to boycott the brand.

Someone famous who I’ve never heard of named T.I. has called for a boycott. Others include Soulja Boy and Spike Lee, who described it as “coonery and buffoonery.” Lee is also boycotting Prada for…wait for it…blackface. That company created a monkey charm named “Otto” that also resembles blackface. These controversies have knocked both companies from the line of succession for Virginia’s governorship.

Gucci’s CEO has agreed to meet with influential Harlem fashion designer Dapper Dan. The company has also pulled the sweater from stores and their website. But not before the media got a good screenshot of it.

I don’t believe Gucci is a racist company that intended to create a $900 blackface sweater. I believe this is more of a product of racially insensitive, arrogant, and obnoxious Italian fashion designers.

I doubt Gucci will replace the Klan hood and become the clothing brand of choice for racists. That particular item is still the MAGA hat.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch the video.

A Virginia Lineup


cjones02112019

What the hell, Virginia? When did we become Mississippi? No offense, Mississippi, but yeah.

Every southern state has an ugly history when it comes to racism. There are still people in the south fighting the Civil War. My former editor of The Free Lance-Star, Ed Jones (no relation) used to tell a joke that here in Fredericksburg, the Civil War was treated like breaking news and if you mentioned the subject, some people would respond with, “what’d you hear?” Ed wasn’t a comedian.

Virginia isn’t much different from other southern states. There are still fights over the Confederate flag, Confederate statues, Confederate History Month, and Jackson-Lee Day (for the two famous Confederate generals). It’s like we need all that stuff in case someone forgets which side Virginia fought for.

Over the past few decades, Virginia has become a purple state, voting for Obama twice, Hillary over Trump in 2016, having two Democratic United State Senators, and our three top elected officials are Democratic. Though there are parts of the state that resembles the north more than the south, it’s those three top elected officials that kinda has us looking more like Florida. No offense, Florida, but yeah.

A right-wing website created by people who supported the racist and accused pedophile Roy Moore published a medical school yearbook that “supposedly” features Governor Ralph Northam in blackface standing next to a guy in a KKK robe, or he was the KKK guy standing next to a guy in blackface. We’re not entirely sure which one, yet. The governor admitted he was in the photo and apologized. A day later, he said he wasn’t in the photo and someone put it on his yearbook page by mistake. Then, he said that he did wear blackface at one time in the 1980s when he entered a Michael Jackson dance contest where he did the moonwalk. As if the jacket, single-white glove, and moonwalk wouldn’t suffice, he needed the blackface. He also said he only applied a little shoe polish to his face, as anyone who’s familiar with the process knows how hard it is to remove. So, how familiar was he with putting shoe polish to his face before the moonwalk thing?

Fortunately, we have a Lieutenant Governor, Justin Fairfax, who can fill in if Northam resigns. He’s young, smart, talented, and African-American…and currently accused of sexual assault. What the? We were very excited to ditch Northam and have Fairfax complete his term as governor. What better way to heal than replacing a racist governor with an African-American? But then this came up, which was also released by that same hater website.

Sheesh! Who’s next in line for the governorship? That’ll be the Attorney General, also a Democrat. Mark Herring. What are the odds that the two highest ranking white guys in the state would have worn blackface at some point in their youth? Apparently, pretty damn good. Herring has come out and stated that he too once wore blackface at a party.

Herring called for the governor to resign before confessing to the Legislative Black Caucus, that at one time, just the once, in 1980, he went to a costume party as rapper Kurtis Blow. Have you ever heard of a black guy going to a party wearing whiteface, so he could be Vanilla Ice? Of course not, partly because Vanilla Ice sucks…but you’ve never heard it being done with the Beastie Boys either, right? The Beastie Boys rule, by the way.

One state legislature who was at Herring’s confessional said that the attorney general wiped tears from his cheek and that legislators also cried. Of course, they cried. That’s because the next in line is a Republican, Kirk Cox, the current Speaker of the House. Do you know how Cox became Speaker? He became Speaker by winning a coin toss. Seriously.

Our next governor could become governor because he won a coin toss, as Democrats basically tied with Republicans for control of the House, so for that one decided House race, they flipped a coin.

Damn. We are becoming Florida.

If we have to keep flipping through all these guys to where it eventually comes down to me, I’ll be disqualified too. Once, in my youth, I too pained my face (technically, my older sister painted my face). In the sixth grade, I went to a school party as Peter Criss of Kiss, the Catman. As we’ve all learned by now, he was a terrible drummer, a coke-snorting alcoholic, and he didn’t really write “Beth.” Also, while wearing the makeup, a lot of people thought I was a girl.

I was pretty but I can’t be governor. I should’ve gone as Ace.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid


cjones02072019

I learned something yesterday during Virginia Governor Ralph Northam’s press conference. It’s very hard to get shoe polish off your face. Of course, why would I have known that? I’ve never felt the inspiration to put shoe polish on my face. I know that if you draw a mustache on someone’s face with a Sharpie, like your little sister while she’s sleeping, that’s hard to wash off. But shoe polish? News to me. I also learned that there’s no better way to piss off someone than drawing a mustache on their face that’s hard to wash off, which is why you do it again.

But, our governor knew the shoe polish face thing at 25. During his press conference, he said he was not either of the two men on his page of his medical school yearbook. In case you don’t remember, one of those guys was in a Klan robe and the other was wearing blackface. The governor did confess that he’s worn blackface in the past while entering a dance contest as Michael Jackson. He even said he learned to moonwalk.

The governor went from apologizing for the photo on Friday night to saying it’s not him on Saturday. The press conference was supposed to make everyone calling for his resignation to change their minds. Instead, there are now more calls for his resignation. Now, it doesn’t matter if it’s him in the photo or not.

He also said he had never seen the photo before, which is hard to believe. I haven’t seen any of my yearbooks in decades, but I’ve seen them. He also didn’t explain the “Coonman” nickname.

While explaining the blackface thing, he said he only put a little on because, “as anyone knows who’s ever put shoe polish on their face,” it’s hard to remove. That doesn’t change the fact he put shoe polish on his face to impersonate a black person. And yes, in 1984, Michael Jackson was still black.

I was there in 1984. No, not at his stupid dance contest. I was a teenager in 1984. People, including white guys, were dressing like Michael Jackson. They were wearing those ridiculous red jackets with 27 dozen zippers while wearing one white glove. I don’t remember ever seeing one of them wearing blackface. Let me point out, this was in the south. I was living in Georgia when Thriller came out, moved to Louisiana before the year was over, and never saw guys doing the blackface thing. Then again, I wasn’t very popular so maybe I just wasn’t invited to all the Michael Jackson blackface parties.

So, yeah. There is a bit of a defense. He went from hateful racist attending a party to mock black people, to oblivious racist thinking he was just having fun. That’s not a good defense. Neither is “it wasn’t me THAT time.”

While people were calling for Northam’s resignation after he apologized for the photo on Friday, he was being respected for owning it. He lost that during his press conference.

Ralph Northam has to resign. Just leave. You can moonwalk while you’re leaving, as long as you’re leaving.

Beat it.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Governor Blackface


cjones02062019

One of the biggest criticisms Ralph Northam received while running for the governorship of Virginia was that he’s too boring. Problem solved. Perhaps he should have been a little more boring during his med school days.

Late Friday afternoon, a photo emerged from a 1984 medical school yearbook that shows a man in blackface and another in a Ku Klux Klan robe. One of the two men is Virginia’s Democratic governor, who was also listed in the yearbook with the nickname “Coonman.” The funny-not-funny thing is we’re not sure which of the two men is the governor. Does it matter?

Northam is a progressive Democrat and many in the state believe his criticism of the Nazi tiki marchers in Charlottesville helped elect him to the state’s top job. He’s spent his political career, which includes a term as Lieutenant Governor, on the correct side of race issues. Northam held great potential for Democrats despite being boring.

Northam quickly released a statement in a video acknowledging the photo and said, “It will take time and serious effort to heal the damage this conduct has caused. I am ready to do that important work. The first step is to offer my sincerest apology and to state my absolute commitment to living up to the expectations Virginians set for me when they elected me to be their Governor.” He didn’t mention any plans to resign.

He didn’t do a Brett Kavanaugh and try to explain it as something that it wasn’t like boofing meant farting and not shooting beer up your bum. Northam owned it.

Even with his accepting responsibility there have been calls for his resignation from the NAACP, Planned Parenthood, the Republican Governors Association, Virginia’s Republican Party, some national Democrats including presidential hopefuls Sen. Elizabeth Warren (Mass.), Sen. Kamala D. Harris (Calif.), Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand (N.Y.), Sen. Cory Booker (N.J.) and Julián Castro, a former mayor of San Antonio, and even singer John Legend.

Virginia Senators Mark Warner and Tim Kaine along with members of the state legislature’s Black Caucus criticized Northam but stopped short of calling for his resignation.

When a Republican’s racist past comes to light, or his present, Democrats always call for their resignation. But, it doesn’t hurt Republicans with their base because their base is just as racist. Democrats and liberals don’t go after the racists with glee and hoping to score political points. They know it’s bad for the nation to have racists in elected positions with political power.

When a Democrat’s racist past comes to light, Republicans go after them with enthusiasm and try to score political points, while ignoring their own racism.

Democrats have to call for Northam’s resignation. You can’t pick and choose which racist behavior you’re OK with. The echo chamber that is the comments under my cartoons on social media have mostly been calls for his resignation. I’ve only counted two liberals among those who believe he should hang in there.

One of my best friends argued by asking if you should give up everything over something stupid you did 34 years ago. Of course not. You shouldn’t stop being a doctor, pilot, or even a cartoonist. But, we’re not governors. If there’s something from your past that prevents people from trusting and following you, then you can’t do your job. In this case, we weren’t aware of Northam’s racist party photo when we were voting for him.

Northam has to resign because he can’t lead anymore. From this point on, he’s no longer Governor Northam and is now Governor Blackface. Governor Northam could accomplish great things and even reach across the aisle. Governor Blackface doesn’t accomplish anything. There are legislative elections in Virginia this November and no Democrat will want to campaign with Governor Blackface.

Northam wants to win our trust back, and he deserves that opportunity, as a private citizen. He shouldn’t be spending the next three years as governor trying to convince us he’s not the same racist guy he was at 25. Yes, 25. He wasn’t a kid. He was a grown man. Northam had the campaign to win us; he’s not to spend his time as governor wooing us back.

As I mentioned, Republicans are all over this while ignoring the racists in their own party. For example, the photos of Northam were exposed by the website Big League Politics, founded by Patrick Howley, a former writer for the Daily Caller and Breitbart. This website is operated by a political consultant who worked on Roy Moore’s campaign, the racist Alabama Senate candidate accused of being a pedophile. Do you really believe these people are out to fight against racism?

I’ve seen posts on social media by Republicans and Trump defenders celebrating the “gotcha” of Northam’s photos. Yet, these same right-wing hypocrites never went after Roy Moore, Steve King, or Donald Trump. They never criticized the Nazis who marched in Charlottesville. They never call for a Republican’s resignation over racism and are always the first to defend them. They even elected Cindy Hyde-Smith to the Senate from Mississippi, after she made jokes about attending lynchings, which is even less funny than blackface. And, Hyde-Smith didn’t make that joke when she was 25. She made it last November and she’s 59.

While liberals may think it’s unfair they have to be better people and live up to a higher standard than conservatives, that’s just the way it is. We don’t want to be like them and we have to present a better example. When a Republican gets caught again, which will be next week, we won’t have any credibility calling for his ouster if we didn’t call for Northam’s. Republicans don’t have credibility. For us, it’s a burden to be ethical. I became a liberal because I like to use facts. We have to use ethics and principles. We can’t Breitbart and Infowars shit. That’s what they do.

When this story hit, I thought I should put it off for a day or so because it was developing. But it just got bigger and bigger by the minute and I realized I’ll probably end up doing two cartoons on it. Virginia is my state. I voted for Northam. I also voted for his potential replacement, Justin Fairfax.

Northam probably won’t survive the weekend. So, Republicans…when you see a photo of our next governor, try not to freak out.

He actually is black.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.