Trump Kim Summit

Fun With Dictators


cjones06182018

Come to Sandals on the beautiful coastline of North Korea. There’s no Wi-Fi. You will be closely monitored and tailed by government officials at all times. You will not be allowed to leave the resort or talk to the locals. If you touch anything, you may be relocated permanently to a different kind of resort. You may return home in a coma. Bring the kids!

Donald Trump’s main takeaway from seeing images of North Korea are the real estate opportunities. Just imagine all the golf resorts on those pristine beaches. Maybe we can set up Carnival cruises. Trump said, “They have great beaches. You see that whenever they’re exploding their cannons into the ocean. I said, ‘Boy, look at that view. Wouldn’t that make a great condo?’ You could have the best hotels in the world right there. Think of it from a real-estate perspective.” Trump needs to start thinking from a presidential perspective.

Trump really liked the North Korean dictator. He liked Kimmy so much, that he canceled military exercises with South Korea, without telling South Korea or even the Pentagon. He didn’t even give Kim Jong Un his patented grip-and-pull-I-have-a-bigger-button handshake.

While Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is “weak,” and “dishonest,” Kim Jong Un is a “funny guy.” He loves his people, and they love him back with “great fervor.” He’s a very “talented guy” with a “great personality” and a “great negotiator.” What about all the people Kim has thrown into gulags? Trump isn’t too worried about them as he says they’re the “great winners” of the summit. The word “great” was tossed around a lot.

Maybe Kim is a funny guy. He often tells this joke: Knock knock. Who’s there? Just kidding. They’re not going to knock when they come to throw you into a gulag.

Trump tweeted about the advice President Obama gave him on North Korea being our biggest problem. Trump says “no more” and “sleep well tonight.”

Trump even made a propaganda video for North Korea. Seriously. It was so good; reporters thought it was made by North Korea. After asking a question during the summit, Trump’s 2020 campaign manager advocated for CNN’s Jim Acosta’s press credentials to be revoked, which is something they’d do in North Korea…and with a firing squad.

Trump showed Kim the propaganda video on an iPad, which made North Koreans ask, “what’s an iPad?”

Kim Jong Un is about as talented and funny as Trump is a deal maker. Kim has no interest in building golf resorts. He’s not interested in improving the lives of his people. He’s a dictator. His main priority is clinging to power through appeasing his military, killing off anyone who is a threat, and manipulating the citizens of his nation. This is a man who had his own brother and uncle killed. Some people have been sentenced to death by being ripped apart by dogs, which means the dogs are eating better than the citizens of North Korea.

Kim Jong Un is paranoid. He was afraid leaving his country for the summit would invite a coup. He even traveled with his own toilet so nobody unauthorized would handle his poo, despite the fact, his people have been brainwashed to believe he doesn’t poo (so who’s going to look for his poo if he doesn’t poo?). Right now, there’s an official poo handler in North Korea wishing to be ripped apart by dogs.

Trump said if he’s wrong about Kim Jong Un and North Korea and it doesn’t work out, he won’t admit he’s wrong, but he’ll find an excuse to lie about it. Maybe, say the summit never happened, or that Obama made him go, or blame Canada. His sycophants will buy any of those reasons because they are more gaslighted than Kim’s supporters. But, in defense of North Koreans, they don’t have access to information.

Otto Warmbier was a student at the University of Virginia. He went to North Korea, was abducted, and Kim sent him back to us in a coma shortly before he died. Trump said Warmbier did not die in vain.

If you doubt that, then you must have missed the part about beach resorts.

Watch me draw.

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American Beaches


cjones06172018

The summit in Singapore between Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un was truly historic. It was the first time an American president legitimized the dictatorial regime of North Korea.

Atlantic writer Jeffrey Goldberg has been searching out the Trump doctrine on foreign policy. After talking to administration officials over several weeks, he finally got one from a White House official with direct access to Trump. It’s “we’re America, bitch.”

That sort of attitude invigorates the testosterone-fueled, alpha-male wannabe Trump sycophants who want to see America mark its territory over friends and foes alike. Former White House official and white supremacists Sebastian Gorka famously said before it was discovered he was an international fugitive, “the era of the pajama boy is over.”

This new era without pajamas has given us a leader who agreed to sit down with a dictator without any preconditions, or consultations with anyone who knows anything about the region being discussed. It just felt good to him. Meeting Hitler probably felt good to Chamberlain too.

Trump told us he didn’t need to prepare for his meeting and his actions display he didn’t prepare at all. He agreed to meet with Kim Jong Un for their first meeting without anyone else in the room except translators. Immediately, he put himself at a disadvantage as Kim can speak English and Trump is still struggling with the language.

During the meeting, he tried to sell Kim the idea of building hotels on North Korean beaches. This is a dictator who refuses to give his people internet access. He’s going to build beach resorts?

Trump says his entire life has been about making deals, and apparently, the art of the deal is getting someone to agree to something they’ve already agreed to. Trump and Kim signed an agreement that Kim had already covered with the president of South Korea. Trump wanted to unveil the details later, but his shtick of showing off his signature gave photographers with zoom lenses the opportunity to see the four conditions on the one-page document.

The agreement said both countries would play nice, the U.S. would provide security guarantees, Kim would destroy a missile facility (just one), they would work on returning the remains of POWs and MIAs, and that Kim reaffirmed his firm and unwavering commitment to complete denuclearisation of the Korean peninsula. This is a weaker agreement than past agreements the North Koreans never kept. This agreement is so weak, they don’t even have to violate it. They can just ignore it. They got the photo-op.

There was no agreement on human rights. No word on Japanese citizens North Koreans kidnapped. Nothing about North Korea hacking American businesses. But, Trump said he’s suspending war games with South Korea, and he desires to withdraw all U.S. forces from the Korean peninsula. Trump did not consult or give a heads up on any of this with South Korea. This is what happens when you don’t prepare.

Trump described Kim as “talented.” He said he developed a “special bond” with Kim, and on people in forced labor camps, Trump said they’re “one of the great winners” of this summit. Did I mention he didn’t prepare? If the people in North Korean gulags had internet access, they could keep the “winning” in mind while eating dirt and cabbage tomorrow.

The one detail that can’t be overlooked is it doesn’t matter what was in the agreement. North Korea breaks promises and so does Donald Trump. While Trump and Fox News sycophants can crow and cheer his handshake with Kim, you have to gauge the “deal” on whom they dealt with.

Donald Trump signed an agreement with a dictator, a man who has murdered hundreds, including members of his own family. This is a regime that enslaves and starves their own people. There is no free press in North Korea. This cartoon and blog will not be read by anyone in the DPRK. Kim Jong Un is still a mystery to the world, but he’s built a cult of personality that Donald Trump can only dream of unless his followers have started to believe he can talk to dolphins and doesn’t poo. Trust me. He poos and dolphins don’t want to talk to him.

Trump left Singapore saying he trusts Kim Jong Un. Trump has given his trust to a dictator, legitimized a murderous, communist regime, and ended military exercises that the DPRK wanted to be gone.

By his not preparing, Donald Trump made himself Kim Jong Un’s bitch.

Watch Me Draw.

Thank you for your support. Reader contributions really do help and are appreciated in a time of dwindling revenue for political cartoonists. You will also be supporting free speech and the First Amendment, and independent journalism while those in power are doing all they can to suppress it. You can also support by purchasing a signed print for $40.00. Just look at the right of this page and click the PayPal button, or you can email and make other arrangements. Thank you!

Nobel Nonsense


cjones05062018

In 2009, the Nobel Committee awarded their prize to Barack Obama. It was thought that it was a preemptive award encouraging him to scale down America’s militaristic foreign policy. In reality, it was given to him because he wasn’t George W. Bush, a man who started a war on false pretenses. It makes me wonder what sort of grand prize will be given to the Democrat who follows Trump?

Republicans and other sycophants are clamoring for Donald Trump to receive the Nobel Peace Prize because North Korea wants to chat. It sounds crazy, right? Should a man who threatens nuclear war, wants to dismantle a treaty that ended Iran’s nuclear program, and has praised Nazis be awarded a peace prize? If you look at past recipients, crazy isn’t new to the Nobel Committee.

Aung San Suu Kyi won the award in 1991 and today she denies the genocide taking place in Myanmar which has led to an exodus of over 400,000 Rohingya Muslims. Her defense is basically, there are good and bad people on both sides. Crap, that sounds familiar.

Cordell Hull won the Nobel AFTER he led a revolt of Southern Democrats opposed to allowing Jewish refugees asylum in the United States. It was because of his pressure that Franklin Delano Roosevelt wouldn’t let them off their boat and shipped them back into the waiting arms of Hitler’s holocaust.

Did you know they gave a Nobel in medicine to the asshole who invented the frontal lobotomy? Did you know that Mahatma Gandhi does NOT have a Nobel?

Sometimes the people who give awards forget what the award is supposed to be for. A couple weeks ago, the Pulitzer Prize for Editorial Cartooning went to two guys, neither of whom are editorial cartoonists and one of them doesn’t even draw. Go figure. But I’m not bitter.

Last week at a rally in Michigan (Michael the Black Man was there in his usual spot behind Trump’s podium), the crowd chanted “Nobel, Nobel, Nobel.” These are the same jerks upset that we signed a treaty with Iran ending their nuclear program, that to this day Iran has not violated, and they no longer have a nuclear program. Trump wants to end this. But, these people love the idea of giving Trump a prize in peace because Kim Jong Un wants to chit-chat.

Remember how Obama and John Kerry were derided for the deal with Iran? They said we can’t trust Iran. But, for some reason, we can trust North Korea who has broken many promises and treaties in the past. Hell, Trump called Kim “honorable” last week. This is a man who had his uncle shot and his brother murdered on foreign soil. He’ll probably end up sharing the Nobel with Trump.

Let that sink in. Sharing a Nobel with Kim Jong Un. Is it really a grand achievement to share an award with a man who starves his nation, threatens war on a daily basis, sends dissenters to gulags, and murders his family? That’d be like sharing it with a wannabe fascist who uses his Justice Department to prosecute his enemies and wants to destroy the free press.

If they want to give Trump a Nobel, they better hurry while there’s still space on his wall for false achievements. He’s claimed credit for Obama’s economy, so maybe he can claim Obama’s Nobel.

Here’s the Video.

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